Before Lotus Leaves (Obi/Qui, JA) - *COMPLETE* - 5/27

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by ithesock, Apr 27, 2005.

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  1. LuvEwan Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 24, 2002
    star 4
    The imagery and emotion in this chapter was so perfectly described. I loved the atmosphere created by the storm, and the closeness of Master and Padawan. The storm just personifies so well what Qui-Gon is, a maverick, unpredictable, and that Obi-Wan is very much the opposite, closing his eyes against the coming thunder. Just beautiful.
  2. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    He felt Qui-Gon?s fingers reach for his own, and clasp them gently. ?My padawan, did my arguments about the Force, over the years, mean nothing to you? Are T?shar?s theories which you?ve heard for a month, much more to you than what we?ve learnt together for almost ten standard years??

    Obi-Wan felt his breath quicken as Qui-Gon?s voice sank lower, assuming a lower timbre. ?Where have I erred in teaching you, Obi-Wan??


    And that is the 100000 credit question, isn't it? How could Obi-Wan listen to someone that he had only known a month and yet ignored his 10 year partnership with Qui-Gon?

    Looking forward to hearing the answer.

    Wonderfully done. Loved the mush, loved the conversation with T'shar and the way he cut across her answers (he was mad!). Just plain loved it.


    And VaderLVR I'm pretty sure I know who ithesock is. She gave herself away earlier but I could be wrong!

    Are you going to reveal that little piece of info later, ithesock?
  3. maychorian Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2005
    star 4
    Beautiful! Love the image of the storm, Obi-Wan drawing close to Qui-Gon.

    I want to know the answer! I'm beginning suspect something deeper than mere words.

    T'ahar is evil, evil, evil.

    Will we get to see Qui-Gon confront her later?

    Keep posting!
  4. Seven Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2000
    star 3
    That was simply magnificent!

    I can't help but feel very down for Master Jinn. I really think that he deserves an answer. But I am really very afraid to find out what that .... ~growls~ woman... said to him to make him so distraught.

    And poor Obi, to have come to such a conclusion, just a little to late to spare his Master, the one person he's been jumping in front of blasters to please. He must feel horible about CAUSING his master such pain.

    ~wince~

    Sometimes I really think that the Force has it in for them.

    More soon please?
    Seven
  5. Shaindl Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 18, 2002
    star 4
    ?...had you but known your apprentice well, Master Jinn, you would have foreseen...?

    So they've had a run-in before, hm? Over another apprentice? Intriguing... [face_thinking] :p

    Somebody should explain to dear Master T'Shar that Jedi do not hold grudges or take out their repressed feelings on innocent Padawans. Or bring up old ghosts to haunt said Padawans with.

    What a cow. [face_cow] :D
  6. Layren Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    star 5
    Yay! I"m all caught up now!

    Used the time waiting for ROTS to catch up on this :D

    Life has been so busy lately with working extra hours and the premier :D


    Everything is so wonderful. The action, the emotions, the dialogue and the internal debates. So lovely.. and I'm just dying along with the rest to try and figure out who you are...
  7. PadawanKitara Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2001
    star 5
    I have my suspicions about you lil' sockie. Are you going to do the whole midnight unmasking thing, or just keep us guessing?

    All I ask is that you keep the mush coming :)
  8. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4

    Oh so moving!
    I loved the way Qui-Gon kept him from waking to give him rest.
    It is beautifully written [face_dancing]
  9. Artanis Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 10, 2005
    star 2
    Oh...now I'm dying to know what happens! *fumes* That evil archivist!

    Great chapter, the descriptions were perfect and the atmosphere fitting. And the cliffhanger - well, I can say it was certainly effective. :)

  10. -Darksaber- Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 22, 2005
    star 3
    Punch her Qui-Gon! Get her right in the eye!
    Growls nastily at evil Vulcan lady....
    *backs T'Shar into corner*
    "I'm not going to kill you, for that is not the way of the Jedi. However, I'm gonna make you wish you were never born, T'Shar"
  11. River_Stone Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 7, 2005
    star 1
    Another wonderful post, well done =D=

    Quite sad that Qui-Gon feels as lost as Obi-Wan when it comes to how evil-woman-who-should-be-slapped created such confusion. It must bring up memories of Xanotos, and his insecurities of how his teachings were responsible for his turn. Poor Qui...

    Loved how you described Qui-Gon's impulsive behaviour and how the other Jedi view it. It can't help his self-doubt, a quality that his Padawan appears to have inherited.

    By the way, T'shar wouldn't happen to spend her free time in the Temple gardens lurking in apple tress and telling small Padawans to eat fruit meant for the Masters, would she?

    xxx [face_love]
  12. ithesock Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 12, 2005
    star 2
    Reply-time :). Am still hung-over on the after-effects of watching AoTC...and I kept thinking how, or why Padme fell for a padawan, when there was this gorgeous master standing right in front of... eh.[shakes head.] Part of the reason why the next post is taking so long to write - I keep thinking about the way Obi-Wan's eyes sparkled while talking to Jango Fett...and its la-la land for a while. :D

    VaderLVR64...>>>I like to have all my options covered!>>. That you do. I was grinning the whole time I read your comment. My poor dear - and all that jello too. [face_mischief] - and if that was a bait, no, I'm not falling for it! [face_laugh]

    LuvEwan...I love it when you write about what the post means to you - like the storm being like Qui-Gon - unpredictable and impulsive. The idea was in my sub-conscious when I wrote it - but your comment really made the picture clear {After which I spent ten minutes re-reading my own post. :D } . Thanks.

    dianethx...thank you. I was thinking of you when I wrote the 'mad' Qui-gon reply. [Am thinking of making him madder]. :) - satisfying you about the 100000 credit question...eh, I can but try. :) >>>She gave herself away earlier but I could be wrong!>>> There is always room for uncertainty, isn't there? [face_laugh] I probably gave myself away a dozen different times - wasn't concentrating on misleading anyone. As for the unveiling...I'm in two minds about it.

    maychorian...and well may you suspect. :) Thank you.

    Seven...yup, the Force does have it in for them - it always tests the best. :D You think Obi is feeling awful at the moment? He's going to feel worse. :(

    Thank you, blue-grey eyes, as always. :)

    Shaindl... now this one really had me sit up with a jerk. :eek: Whoa. Another padawan...>>>Somebody should explain to dear Master T'Shar that Jedi do not hold grudges or take out their repressed feelings on innocent Padawans. Or bring up old ghosts to haunt said Padawans with.>>>

    Somebody should explain a lot of things to her...that I agree with. :)

    Layren...so glad you finally caught up - and before the show, no less. :D Thank you very much. And happy confusion!

    PadawanKitara...little PK, no unmasking-thingie, as midnight's already passed - to tell the truth, the idea never even occured to me. :D. More mush you will get, methinks.

    Gkilkenny ...thank you. :D

    Artanis...well, sinatra, I didn't plan it a cliff-hanger - it just came out that way. Yes, that archivist is evil - from a certain point of view. :) Thank you.

    -Darksaber-...whoa. [Archivist T'shar looks at Master Jinn warily] "I won't...I didn't..."
    Thanks [face_laugh]

    River_Stone...no, it can't help Master Jinn's self-esteem. On the other hand, his theory of 'living in the moment' must help him considerably, I think. :) .

    >>>By the way, T'shar wouldn't happen to spend her free time in the Temple gardens lurking in apple tress and telling small Padawans to eat fruit meant for the Masters, would she?>>>

    [face_laugh] She's a workaholic, y'know. Doesn't believe in going to Gardens. She accomplishes all she wants without resorting to fruit-trees. :D

    Half done with next post. Question is...it looks like its going to be longer than I thought it'd be.Am wondering if I should split it up (for the angst content, and all that) - or just dish it out in one big....serving. :confused:

    And it's also likely to be the last. :)

    [prays no one'll say... "just end the dratted thing!"]


  13. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    Split it up into two. That way, the enjoyment lasts longer. And for me, it's more like, darn it's almost over!
  14. ithesock Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 12, 2005
    star 2
    Thanks :). Split-up it'll be, then. :)

    And here you go......

    ************

    XIII


    Obi-Wan flinched. No, no, no. Not that. Not that.

    Qui-Gon could sense his discomfort?not only from the way the Force swirled around him, uncertainly?but also from the way the padawan?s eye-brows knit together and his eyes closed, as though in pain. He extended his senses, determining again that the younger Jedi was not injured?confirming that Obi-wan was in no great physical pain.

    Obi-Wan felt the probe, and in some obscure way, felt re-assured. In one way, it made things easier to explain?in another way, however, he had never felt the weight of a confession?of sorts?quite so much.

    Intermittent flashes of lightning lit up the Gardens every now and then, throwing the foliage into sharp relief. Rain had begun its heavy descent moments ago spattering in thick drops all over the ground?the force of the wind had thrown some moisture into the corridor, too. Through it all, he could sense Qui-Gon sitting beside him quietly, looking out into the rain, ankles crossed, and one hand in his lap while the other covered his own.

    Rarely did his master find such moments of peace?such things were luxuries not granted to Jedi, and they were taught to accept refreshment whenever they could. Qui-Gon had gone through his own share of difficulties the past month?and now, when he might be expected to acquire some rest, he would be ruining it. And there would be the inevitable repercussions to what he would have to say?

    I have put it off long enough. I cannot do so, anymore.

    Resolutely, he began. ?The mission to Calai?that was when it started.?

    To his left, he heard Qui-Gon draw a deep breath, and felt the hand that had held his, removed. ?Proceed.?

    He bit his lip, trying to arrange his jumbled recollections in some order, and to keep away the inclination to lose himself in them. ?I?was not in favour of your going alone, master.?

    ?I was aware of it, padawan. You made it a point to tell me.?

    Obi-Wan lowered his head. ?I always felt it too dangerous for a lone Jedi to handle??

    Qui-Gon raised his eye-brows, but did not comment.

    Obi-Wan continued. ?As your padawan, I knew it to be my duty to come with you.?

    ?The Council forbade it, Obi-Wan. And they had their reasons.?

    Obi-Wan bit his lip. ?Forgive me for saying so?but I could not agree with it.?

    ?The Calains are contemptuous beings, padawan?this I?ve already explained. They have little respect even for the Jedi, and only agreed to the Senate?s offers of reconciliation, because it affected their trade agreements. Theirs is a strictly hierarchical society, and the Council was of the opinion that your age would not aid us there. Instead, they thought it pertinent to send me.?

    ?Alone.? Obi-Wan?s voice grew slightly sharp. ?There had already been three assassination attempts on various members of the planet?s negotiation party, master?one of whom was eventually killed.?

    Qui-Gon?s voice was mild. ?It isn?t as though I haven?t faced attempts on my life before this, padawan.?

    ?True.? Obi-Wan risked a look at the still profile beside him. ?And I have been with you on each mission that involved such a situation, since?? he paused. ?Can you deny that I?that I did my best in averting danger whenever possible??

    ?No, young one,? Qui-Gon?s voice had grown softer. ?I cannot deny it?nor will I deny the fact that your presence was a reassurance, at such times.?

    ?Why then, and not now??

    ?I can only offer you the Council?s own explanation?it would have served no purpose. We have been on many missions where there were attempts on lives after we entered the negotiation phase?and the Force has been merciful in averting disaster of a large magnitude?here was a situation in which it had crossed the danger mark. My presence was what might be called a last-ditch effort at averting what was already a crisis situation?? his voice trailed away.

    Obi-Wan swallowed, eyes glittering as he stared through the rain-covered horizon. ?In other w
  15. maychorian Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2005
    star 4
    Ooh. Very intriguing. Amazing how you manage to keep me interested in this esoteric debate. Can't wait for more. Everything's still a bit murky, isn't it?
  16. -Darksaber- Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 22, 2005
    star 3
    Qui-Gon turned then, recognizing the slight waver in the apprentice?s voice, and swiftly placed a hand on the young man?s forehead. ?Padawan, there is no need to apologize.?

    Ooooh, goody,good.

    More please, ithesock.
    *tries to use her control of the Force to influence Sockies mind into doing a new post*
  17. Seven Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2000
    star 3
    ~looks at the new update with absolute adoration~

    ~face falls as she realizes she needs to leave for and eight and a half hour shift~

    SITH!

    I apologize, Master Writer ithesock, But I have to leave. But rest assured that I will be back in .... nine and a half hours to review for you!

    Enjoy the pst everyone... since I can't!

    ~wails and goes to work~

    Seven
  18. Artanis Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 10, 2005
    star 2
    Ooooh, very nice. I have to say I'm still pretty confused, but then, maybe I'm supposed to be. :) The chapter was great! Can't wait to see what the "other factors" are. Good job!
  19. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    More did you say??? I liked the explanation of why Obi-Wan was listening to T'shar even if she was wrong to belittle his choices and make him question himself and Qui-Gon.

    I look forward to reading about the more.... :D
  20. Seven Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2000
    star 3
    ~falls into her chair in a decidedly tired manner~

    I'm back! And I am more than ready to review.

    Well Master Writer ithesock, I must say that that was once again with the most supreme skill.

    I adored the interaction between the two of them. It made me want to squish them both in huge hugs.

    I still feel so bad for them both. Obi-Wan having to sit at home wondering if his Master would ever come home. After all, Obi is dedicated soley to those that he loves, and to be forced to sit and wait for bews that would almost definatley be death would me more than a touch horrifing to him.

    And Qui-Gon, Having left thinking that what was most dear to him was where is would be safest, only to come home to find it nearly destroyed by the hands of some arrogant witch.

    Pah! She sucks. Down with evil archivists!

    As I have once again delighted in this most estemed story, I believe that I shall go to bed.

    Again this post was golden.

    Hoping for more soon,
    Yours,
    Seven
  21. LuvEwan Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 24, 2002
    star 4
    Wish I was coherent enough to write more of a review, but I'm not. So I'll just leave it at this: beautiful and engrossing. ;)
  22. River_Stone Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 7, 2005
    star 1
    That was very sad :(

    ?The galaxy is full of what are perceived and given up as lost causes, padawan, while in reality, they are not?and very few to champion them. I know of none better than you, to achieve success with them.?

    Right on, Qui! Tell it as it is!

    How like Obi-Wan to act in such a manner, to seek understanding because he feels he is failing Qui-Gon's teachings in his confusion. Obi-Wan never saw it the way Qui-Gon did...until it was too late.

    ?While I admit that you certainly must have released your fear and guilt into the Force?there are other factors involved.?

    Would the other factors involved be, per chance, that this woman is incredibly narrow minded, vindictive, and actually holds a red light-sabre? ('What Master Yoda? No, my light-sabre isn't red...oh, will you look at that? Could have sworn it was blue this morning...)

    Great job, keep up the fantastic work [face_love]
  23. The_Hutt Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2004
    star 1
    Ah! Sorry I missed commenting on the last few posts! Things have been busy. I have been reading them, however; I've been printing them out and taking them with me to work, so that I could have a bastion of sanity. :D I must say, I've really loved the last few posts! I could truly sense Obi's discomfort throughout the whole situation. I've been in this situation before, being gently questioned and reprimanded at the same time. Despite the other person's good intentions, it can be quite hard not to become defensive and emotional, and I admire Obi's control. These flashbacks- it seems as though through all this, Qui has managed to talk to T'shar? I really loved his "Don't inturrupt me!" dig. T'shar might be able to impress herself upon younger Jedi, but honestly, she couldn't have that that her same smugness would have worked on Qui-Gon! I'm beginning to see where she is coming from, but I still don't like her condescending attitude...
    I like the discussion about how being prepared for one's own death is not as difficult as preparing for anothers. Their pain was quite tangible, and it will no doubt take Obi much more time to resolve it so easily.

    ?It would serve us well, if we were heartless?unfortunately, we require a heart to accomplish what we must. What is required, therefore, is a heart that is soft enough to melt with compassion?yet is hard as a rock when it comes to duty. That, young one, is why some Jedi are ordinary, many are good?but only a few are destined for greatness.?

    Hmm, maybe I shouldn't have posted the above section, but I just love the entire thing. Very well written! One of those sections that lingers in my mind, not only in wording, but in truth. If that makes sense. Anyways, loved the posts, and I can't wait for the next!
  24. Neo-Paladin Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 10, 2004
    star 4
    It's a good thing I rock climb, because this is a preaty nice cliff you left us hanging on ;)

    I do love how you built the situation around Obi-Wan that lead to his ... confusion. o_O

    I can't wait for more!
  25. PadawanKitara Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2001
    star 5
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