Man Bites Dog - the zany headline game - game has a winner

I don't know, the monthly magazine is just called Contemporary Urology.

[/serious]

 

CROOKED ANGEL, NUN, MAYOR INDICTED
25+10+50+10+25=120 + 140 = 260

The Mayor of a small Canadian town has been accused of burglary. He claims that a nun and an angel instructed him to do so. His sanity is being questioned.

 

BIZARRE STAR PSYCHIC HITS, SLAYS

=105

HITS 10 points
SLAYS 10 points
STAR 10 points
BIZARRE 50 points
PSYCHIC 25 points

Famous Psychic I. C. Younow Hits and Slays an innocent squirrel as it ran in front of his car. The bizarre thing was the psychic did not see it coming.

 

EXCLUSIVE! NAKED HEIRESS REVEALED

50+10+50x2+95=295


I can't go into much detail here.

 

CRUEL HUBBY STUNS MYSTERY BLONDE

STUNS 10 pts
MYSTERY 25 pts
CRUEL 10 pts
BLONDE 25 pts
HUBBY 25 pts

= 95 points

In a case of mistaken identity a husband stunned a mystery blonde that he mistook for his wife by inviting her for a quickie back at his office; or so goes the husband's story.

 

SECRETARY RIPS OFF VACCINE, STABS UROLOGIST

VACCINE 25 pts
RIPS OFF 10 pts
STABS 25 pts
UROLOGIST 50 pts
SECRETARY 25 pts

= 135

I am not so great at coming up with stories, it seems.

 

MOB BOSS HITS EXEC, TRICKS JUDGE
25+10+10+10+25 = 80 + 260 = 340

He persuaded the judge that he was innocent.

 

DROPS 10 pts
COP 25 pts
SUSPECT 10 pts
INTERN 10 pts
AGAIN 25 pts


Intern cop drops suspect, again.


10 + 25 + 10 + 10 + 25 = 80

His only comment to the press was ?Oops.?

 

Wanted Tycoon Shoots, Saves Biggie

25 + 25 + 10 + 10 + 10 = 80

International business tycoon Yenom Rallod, wanted on seven hundred and seventy-seven counts of tax evasion, is reported to have shot a turkey weighing in at 86 lbs while hunting. Reports also indicate that he has preserved it in his personal freezer to save for Thanksgiving dinner. Gobble gobble!

 

BEAUTY 25 pts
JEALOUS 25 pts
MOURNS 10 pts
LADY 10 pts
EXCLUSIVE! - use it to double the score on this headline

EXCLUSIVE! Jealous Lady Mourns Beauty

25+10+10+25= 70*2= 140+175= 315

"Her prettyfulness and beautality was WASTED! WHy did she have to DIE?"

 

NAVY 10 pts
BURNS 10 pts
LAST 25 pts
BORED 25 pts
1st Lady 50 pts

Bored 1st Lady Burns Last Navy
120 + 340 = 460

Bored by the long war, she set fire to the last remaining remaining enemy navy.

 

Exclusive! Crazy Brave Nails Thousands!

25 + 25 + 10 + 25 = 85 x 2 = 170

In a stunning display of his hunting prowess, the famously eccentric Native American hunter who calls himself 'Goyathlay' tracked, hunted, and shot several thousand wild animals for food over the course of a year with his simple, handcrafted bow. In an interview with our reporters, he said that his success was due in part to his strategy of frequently moving across the country by jet to new hunting territory, where the native fauna would not be familiar with him.

 

NUDE 25 pts
DUMPS 25 pts
GIRL 10 pts
FAKE 25 pts
EXCLUSIVE! - use it to double this headline score.

EXCLUSIVE! Girl Dumps Nude Fake

10+25+25+25= 85*2= 170+315= 485

"He wasn't who I thought he was. He was a fake. And I mean that in the he really was a fake person way. Like, he didn't have a brain or anything. And he was naked all the time. Like, clothes just wouldn't stay on his body 'cause it was was slippery and made of plastic. I checked. Gosh, why can't a just find a real, dateable guy?! At least no one knows wher I dumped the body. Whoops, did I say that out loud?""

 

PREZ 25 pts
TEEN 10 pts
SLAYS 25 pts
BLASTS 10 pts
DOG 25 pts

Teen Prez Slays Dog.


85+440=525

 

WALL ST 10pts
NAKED 50 pts
ACCUSED 25 pts
TOURIST 10 pts
BLAMES 25 pts

ACCUSED NAKED TOURIST BLAMES WALL ST

The economy has even hit tourists hard as a naked tourist blamed Wall St for his less than stellar portfolio.

 

CONVICT 25 pts
LOVER 25 pts
SINGER 50 pts
PSYCHIC 25 pts
FALLS FOR 25 pt


Convict singer falls for psychic lover

25 + 50 + 25 + 25 + 25 = 150

 

1. DarthAnakin101
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I like the discard idea, though I probably wouldn't use it. I fear change.

Congrats, EmpireForever!

 

1. DarthAnakin101
2. BaSSiL
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