Before Mask of Duty - AU - guess what? A POST!!! 12-21-04!! :D

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Arldetta, Mar 29, 2004.

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  1. The_Hutt Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2004
    star 1
    Wow, that was an excellent post, Arldetta! The confusion and intrigue between Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan is almost touchable, and it's breaking my heart how Obi-Wan is punishing himself. Without his master, he feels so alone and so lost. And it seems that he's never met someone like Qui-Gon before; when emotional stability is so important to those of Obi-Wan and Klp's kind, I can see how Qui's passionate nature would be so frustrating and yet enviable to them. And now Bruck is on the scene? Obi-Wan's self-punishing nature doesn't exactly give him a hand in these situations! Come on Qui-Gon, walk in to the scene now! Okay....NOW! come on! Anyways, great post, and thanks also for updating FnB!
  2. shanobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 11, 2001
    star 4
    Oh, that was good Ari. They were doing so good, but Qui hit just a little too close to home. It's totally understandable that Qui is going to have to very slowly earn this boy's trust. Unfortunately, he's not off to a good start. I have faith that Qui's compassion and overall affectionate behaviour will make a dent - - eventually.

    Oh Bruck!! Why that little snot :mad: An intro like that can only go downhill. I hope Obi atleast sticks up for himself verbally - since we know he wont use the Force in any way, for fear of hurting the big bully.

    Great job - I love how this is developing :) I just love the paradox here of Qui being the one to trying to get closer to Obi :) Keep up the good work.

    --shan
  3. Arldetta Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 19, 2002
    star 4
    Well, well, now. Very interesting comments. Considering I still have no clue as to where I'm really going with this fic, I really appreciate everyone's candid remarks. It helps me get a better hold on where this may be headed. ;) Thanks!! :D


    So, here's today's little diddy. Hope you like it. Just try to remember what my forte is whenever I write, be it here or FnB. It is the reason that "Poor Obi" is our slogan!! [face_devil] Anyway, here you go.....

    -------------------------------------------------------

    Breathlessly, he said, ?Bruck.? He couldn?t believe he hadn?t felt him. But then again his mind was preoccupied with Qui-Gon Jinn. He had lost his chance to bypass his rival and avoid this encounter.

    ?Yes, Oafy? It?s been a while hasn?t it??

    ?Please, not right now. Please.?

    ?Why not? Afraid you?ll kill me like your Master?? He taunted, a wicked grin on his lips. His smile broadened when he saw the pained and startled look in Obi-Wan?s eyes. ?Oh, yes, I know that you?re Master?s dead. I?m sure you had a hand in it,? the white-haired boy snickered.

    Obi-Wan?s breath caught in his chest. ?No,? he mouthed before finally finding his voice, ?I tried saving him. But I couldn?t.?

    ?Couldn?t or didn?t want to??

    His vision blurred at the accusation as the memory crashed into him again. Abruptly he closed his eyes to ward off the recollection. His voice broke, ?I couldn?t, he wouldn?t let me.? Still pressed against the wall, Obi-Wan?s body went slack. Defeated. The nipa in his hand slipped from his grasp.

    ?I?m not surprised, if I were him I wouldn?t have let you either. Now come on, let?s go catch up on old times. The training rooms should still be free.? Bruck yanked him from the wall and pushed him forward. Together they walked to one of the training rooms on the same level.

    *

    Qui-Gon was slowly making his way out of the Room of a Thousand Fountains. After Obi-Wan had run out, he was not really up to staying. As he walked along, he looked at his half-eaten fruit. He found that he was no longer hungry with the bitter taste in his mouth. He discarded it in a waste receptacle and headed for home.

    He was walking along the halls, deep in thought when an odd sensation washed over him. He could feel a hint of apprehension and something darker. But then the sensation seemed to be pulled away from him, like a vacuum suddenly swallowed them up. His heart skipped a beat as he realized what he felt. Frantically, he looked around searching for something. Then his eyes spotted it. On the ground near the wall sat a nipa fruit. Automatically, he went over to it and picked it up. It was much softer than before as if it ripened within the few minutes he had given it to Obi-Wan.

    He looked up then, seeing if he could catch a glimpse of the youth but found none. But something didn?t feel right to him. He hurried through the halls seeking out that void that was becoming more and more familiar to him.

    *

    ?Which would you prefer, Oafy? Saber or hand-to-hand? Either way you?re taking a beating.?

    ?Please Bruck, not now.? Obi-Wan said from the floor. Bruck had pushed him down on the mat once they reached the salle. He didn?t have the strength to get up and fight back. But more importantly, he didn?t have the will either.

    ?Come on, Oafy, we haven?t sparred in a while. It?ll be fun, and serve as a good reminder of how worthless you are.?

    ?Why must you torment me so? I told you I was sorry for what happened. But that doesn?t matter to you, does it??

    ?Shut up and fight.? Bruck plucked his saber from his belt and held it aloft, unlit.

    ?I won?t fight you Bruck. I won?t play along this time.? He was getting more and more tired. His body may have been healed but as a whole he was no where near fully recovered.

    Bruck scowled and lit his saber. He commanded his opponent, ?Fight!? Then charged the kneeling form.

    Obi-Wan barely had time to block. In the Temple, the Force was easily accessible once you knew how to tap it and he was able to
  4. Kynstar Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2004
    star 5
    Yeah! Qui to the rescue... well sorta. Poor Obi... he does realize Qui wants to help but just to stubborn to allow him to help. Ironic isn't it? Juz like Qui! ;) hehehe

    Great post!!!
  5. jeday Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 4, 2004
    star 2
    Yes, Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon match perfect in their stubbornness! :) :D
  6. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    Great job, Ari. I loved that Qui-Gon was able to break up the fight and get Bruck to leave! And now Qui-Gon is beginning to sense the hole in the Force and some of Obi-Wan's emotions leaking through it. Good. Keep it up, Qui and you'll blast through those barriers of Obi eventually.

    Looking forward to more!

    And if you need more prodding, just let me know. I'll be glad to prod you!
  7. Opal Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 17, 2003
    star 4
    Wonderful. I love frequent posties.
  8. Shaindl Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 18, 2002
    star 4
    Listen to your heart, Qui, not logic! Can't wait to see what happens when they finally get together.

    Shaindl
  9. The_Hutt Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2004
    star 1
    Ach, Bruck needs to get a life. He has nothing better to do than harass people who have suffered mental and physical sufferings? Argh! He is so awful! It kills me that Obi-Wan barely has the desire to defend himself in such situations! I wish there was a bit of understanding between Obi and Qui. Qui-Gon was simply worried, but Obi-Wan simply thought that he was being a meddlesome person. If Obi-Wan has such power over the force, he should be able to grasp the intentions behind Qui-Gon's actions. So untrusting, though it's somewhat understandable. And I agree with Jeday and Kynstar...Qui and Obi's stubborness is really getting in the way of things...why don't they just have a simple talk without letting their impassioned emotions get in the way? I know, I know, I'm ranting a lot, but I rant because I love! Great chappie!
  10. Arldetta Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 19, 2002
    star 4
    Sorry not much chatter today. Doing a hit-and-run kinda post. Try to be back later tonight for more. ;)

    -------------------------------------------------------

    Absently, his thumb and forefinger gently rubbed his chin while he sat in his favourite chair. He pondered the recent events, mulling them over and over again in his mind. The universe never ceased to amaze him and the past 48 hours have been the most turbulent by far. And above all things, Qui-Gon disliked his world in chaos. So it was quickly becoming his obsession to find a solution. And so his thoughts were predominated by the enigma that began this wild storm.

    Of course, he didn?t know why the boy plagued him so. Maybe it was curiosity or his drive to solve riddles or could it be something else? He had been given the answers he sought. After the incident on Melida/Daan, Qui-Gon was able to discover why he had blacked out. That had been his original goal. Then why was he still thinking about Obi-Wan Kenobi?

    And that was what he had been trying to figure out since their last encounter. Qui-Gon wished in some way they could have started over. But if time could roll back, he would then have to face the boy?s previous Master, Garg Klp, and that was something he refused to do. When he had first met the boy, his manner was mild but the logic in many ways resembled that of his Master. He was cool, emotionless and determined to continue a mission that had already been deemed a failure. But it was also the boy?s stubbornness that brought them back to Coruscant. He had been wounded, which Qui-Gon realized he had never really discovered how, and been ignoring it. An infection set in and when he had drained all his strength, the boy collapsed and that?s when it was discovered.

    So they rushed back to Coruscant and he learned of Force Channelers. Could it be that he wanted to know more about their abilities that kept his thoughts on Obi-Wan? Perhaps that was it. He needed to know what they could do. Master Uvontra had indicated that they could be very dangerous if not handled properly. Or if they fell to the darkside. The thought sent a shiver up his spine. For some reason, he didn?t believe that Obi-Wan would ever turn, but what if he were forced into it?

    He also had some questions for the Troll. He was beginning to suspect that the little green Master knew more than the boy?s Channeling abilities. There was a hint of uneasiness during their meeting when he mentioned his black out and they were all too quick to dismiss the incident. Which led him to wonder if maybe the Jedi were being shielded for other reasons. These considerations brought him back to Obi-Wan. If there was something on the horizon, Qui-Gon had a suspicion that Obi-Wan and those like him could be the key.

    Could there be someone out there lurking, waiting for the chance to spring on the Jedi or Republic and in the process use those select few to conquer the rest of the universe? He recalled Melida/Daan, just the power to deflect blaster fire without the use of a lightsaber was incredible. And the ripple he felt outside the training room was fascinating. In his mind?s eye it reminded him exactly like a pebble had been thrown into the middle of a smooth pond. But only one wave had fanned out. The curiosity was eating away at his resolve. What else was the boy capable of? How well could he control his abilities? In a way he longed to know what it was like to have that kind or power. To be that close to the Force that it is infused within your entire being. The thought was intoxicating.

    His mind flitted from one thought to the next, unable to settle on one notion or another. If only he was able to work with the boy more. There was so much he could learn. And not only that, he could teach the boy as well. The Padawan?s emotions were in chaos, that much he knew. If given the chance he could show him how to control those emotions, not simply bury them. There had to be a way to draw him out, to get him to let go, the question was, how? A
  11. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    Hurray you posted again and so quickly. I'm very envious!

    I'm glad that Qui-Gon is going after Obi. The fact that he can sense him and is continually curious about him indicates that perhaps they would be good together.

    And poor Obi-Wan, trying to do what is right and only getting in deeper and deeper. Channeling that much power is not good. I hope that Qui can figure out that Obi needs to go to that room. Will Qui leave him there alone? I don't think so but I'll let our lovely author have the final word....

    Good job.
  12. Padawan_Travina Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 5, 2002
    star 4
    Hmm great last two posts my friend..Evil like always..**smiles**

    I love how you are explaining the Force and its uses in this one..and love how you are slowly brining Obi and Qui together with out them even seeing it.

    Wonder though what will happen in the next post..Will Qui be able to see what needs to be done? Will Obi be able to state what needs to be done and keep his power under control until then?

    Tune in tomorrow. Same Jedi Channel Same Jedi Time.

    --PT
  13. Kynstar Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2004
    star 5
    NOOOOO! Evil Cliffy! And this is the worst one yet!! Arggg! *Breath slow...must relax* *snrk* hehehe hold me by the edge of my seat you do! Ack! Please post soon!!!

    *sniff* poor Obi...
  14. Musing Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Oct 31, 2003
    star 2
    I don't think the midi-chlorians concept really spoils the mysticism of Star Wars, Arldetta. It's just a different explanation of how things work - sort of the way some people prefer the Biblical story of Creation over Darwin's theory of evolution. And knowing that midi-chlorians is the mechanism by which certain people can manipulate the Force doesn't mean everything about it can be explained - it's comparable to unravelling the mystery surrounding genes. Anyhow, you can't have a fanfic in this genre without a little science in it somewhere! :)
  15. Shaindl Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 18, 2002
    star 4
    Sniffle. If Qui doesn't realise after this what his real motivation is, I hope Tahl hits him. Hard. With a big stick, if possible.

    Lovely post, Arl!

    Shaindl
  16. Opal Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 17, 2003
    star 4
    Oooh, you're really starting to turn the angst up a nothch now, aren't you?

    Excellent as always. :)
  17. RosyRedFinguredDawn Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2003
    star 3
    I never feel I have much to say other than good job, but its always nice to hear that so I'll say it.

    I really liked the further explanation you gave in this chapter and how it was muddled by Obi-Wan's thoughts. I wish Qui good luck. Thanks and keep it up.
    ~Rosy
  18. jeday Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 4, 2004
    star 2
    Very evil cliffie! :
    Hope they find a way to help Obi-Wan. :(
  19. The_Hutt Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2004
    star 1
    Woo hoo! This thread gets so many updates, it's great! But what a cliffie you left us with on this one! It would be interesting if Qui and Obi would just sit down and have a frank conversation about Obi's abilities. It would be intrigueing to see what Qui-Gon, who is not a channeler but seems to have some sort of connection to Obi-Wan, could offer Obi-Wan on the matter of his abilities. Even though Klp's techniques seemed to work to a certain degree, that doesn't mean that his teachings were the best option. I don't think that any path that encouraged one to close their mind off could be a good thing. Obi-Wan is doing just that and look where he is now?! And what is going to happen if his shields collapse entirely? I think the result doesn't necessarily have to be negative...Why did the force react to Obi so oddly when he tried to heal his wound? Why did it swell do dangerously that he had to try to cut himself off from it? Is it just that the force is such a part of him and he doesn't have control? And why does Qui-gon sense Obi-Wan as a void? Is it because of his strict shields? Ach, so many questions. Sometimes when I read these threads I don't know if my questions are simply going to be answered later on or if I am truly dense and I'm not getting the hints. Anyways, good postie! This one's going to keep me up at night!
  20. Arldetta Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 19, 2002
    star 4
    Unfortunately, I'm doing another hit-n-run posty. [face_blush] I promise to come back tonight though.

    Enjoy!!

    -------------------------------------------------------

    Cautiously, Qui-Gon approached Obi-Wan. As he drew nearer he could feel the Force emanating from the boy. For the first time since their meeting, the young Padawan did not speak first which meant that he was not aware of the Master?s presence. Qui-Gon knelt down next to the youth and gently placed a hand on a trembling shoulder. Immediately, his hand shot back. When they touched it was like a surge of electricity coursed up the man?s arm. Even now it still tingled from the contact. Despite this, it achieved the desired effect. Obi-Wan?s eyes popped open.

    It almost knocked the Knight over. Haunted, pained and pleading oceans stared up at him. So often he had only seen hints of emotion in those depths but now, now there was an overabundance. Somewhere inside him he thought that the range of feeling he saw made them more captivating and inviting. But he quickly pushed this thought aside when a strained and shaky voice begged, ?r-room??hafto?..get???please?

    Confusion clearly shown on his face, ?Room? What room, Obi-Wan?? The boy?s eyes clenched and he fell back moaning once again. Qui-Gon waited apprehensively for an answer that wasn?t coming. ?Obi-Wan, what room??

    ?Force Chambers below we must take him. Quickly.? The trio turned to see the little green Master walking down the hall. He urged, ?Hurry we must.?

    Nodding, but not quite understanding, Qui-Gon turned back to the youth. He bent down even further to whisper gently in the child?s ear. ?Obi-Wan, we are going to take you to the room now but I will need to carry you.? Aquamarine gems fluttered open, but there was understanding in them as well. Taking a deep breath, he reached down and picked the fragile form up. Gratefully, the boy did reign in the power tighter, reducing the charge he had felt down to mild tingling in his arms and chest where he held the boy closely.

    The now quartet rushed through the halls down a few more levels and entered a strange hallway. At the end of which was a set of double doors. Walking through they found a huge spacious room and in the center sat a large metal box with a door. ?In there, quickly.? Yoda commanded. Tahl had lifted up the tiny Master onto a stool, he then punched in a number of codes into a keypad next to the door. Automatically, it swung open and a light turned on inside.

    His attention was drawn to the figure in his arms. ?can?t?..hold?..?

    ?Now, Qui-Gon.?

    He looked at the Master one last time before making his way inside. The interior was very plain and very white. The only piece of furniture in the room was a thin sleep couch in the corner. He took a step in its direction but dropped to his knee instead when Obi-Wan?s body arched almost causing him to drop him. The shaking had increased tenfold. Through chittering teeth, Obi-Wan cried, ?Leave!? Somehow he found the strength to push at the Knight.

    The intense electric charge was back, Qui-Gon could do little else than let the boy slide out of his arms to the floor. The small body continued to thrash. ?Go!? A desperate scream escaped Obi-Wan.

    Qui-Gon was back peddling his way out of the room, his eyes never leaving the youth. As soon as he stumbled over the threshold, the door slid closed. One tiny window was inlaid to the door allowing him to watch the boy?s throes. Stunned and entranced at the same time he watched as the power finally overcame the child. All those standing beyond the door heard the piercing scream that tore out of the boy?s throat. An instant later, they felt the swell in the Force that crashed through the room and even past the reinforced walls to roll out through the Temple.

    He, like the others, took a step or two back but that was all. A bit awestruck, he was amazed at what happened. What he felt when the power was released was almost soothing. The only thing his mind could compare it to was when he floated
  21. shanobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 11, 2001
    star 4
    What a busy little bee you've been Ari. I'm off line for a couple of days and you've got three new posts up. You're muse really seems to be in full swing - I hope it stays there :D

    I love the direction you seem to be taking here. That was quite the Force wave Obi sent out. Even some in the city felt it? And someone in the senate? So, does that mean Palpy is going to be making an appearance? Have to wait and see I guess.

    So Qui has finally submitted to his feelings here. That was a nice read. It's about time. Those two can be so sweet together. Can't wait to see what's next in store for these two.

    --shan

    Oh, and Musing - glad to see i'm not the only author you are keeping on their toes :)
  22. Shaindl Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 18, 2002
    star 4
    Oh, Arl, I so needed to read something mushy! Thanks for filling the need. :) Lovely job - I'm glad Tahl didn't have to hit Qui with the big stick I mentioned. ;)

    Cheers,

    Shaindl
  23. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    Wonderful! I love that Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan are now Master and apprentice. I just hope that Obi-Wan will remember all this when he wakes up again. Of course, now Qui will have to deal with his Padawan's powers and control. Hope he can cope!

    Great job. Looking forward to more....
  24. Padawan_Travina Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 5, 2002
    star 4
    WHOO!!! They are finally a pair..took them long enough.

    Great job..and I like everyone else hope that once Obi wakes up he will remember what just happened and be willing to let Qui be his master.

    Great job so far and I look forward to more.

    --PT
  25. Kynstar Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2004
    star 5
    *SNIFF!!* Ohhhhh so touchy feely!! *sniff* Warm fuzzy feelings in me heart!! Love this soooo much!
    Not even realizing, he pulled the boy closely to him, hugging him firmly but tenderly. He never wanted to let Obi-Wan go. Somehow in the midst of their squabbles he had grown to love the boy. And the thought of losing him was more than the Knight could bear. It was then that he felt the tears that were coursing down his own face. Not thinking, he pressed his weathered cheek against the boy?s forehead.

    *SIGH* soooo good! Ummm Please do tell what Masters Windu & Yoda are thinking on this! I bet Tahl is touched by it as well! Ummm wonder what Bant thinks..

    Great play of emotional display there! :D Great work! Can't wait for the next update!!!!

    (Edit: had to reread it once more! Yep it's that good of a postie!! Loved the defiance Qui showed the Councilors!! hehehe 'While you stand here...I'm going in." *snrk* loved that! You tell them you emotional handsome loving man you are Master Jinn!!)
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