Before - Legends Masquerade -The Betrayer and The Fool - part two" posted 16/3/06 - NEW beaut competition

Sara, all if would have taken was just a jab with the knife....

Great job!

HaiGan!!

 

Dianethx - Thanks That's a big compliment coming from a talented writer such as yourself. Yep, Sara is starting to realise the truth about Xani, but how much of that she actually acts on is another matter.

Mouse - Where did you go? Sara has a choice? You're forgetting what sort of relationship Xani is setting her up for. Her choice is Xani's choice because the two of them are linked.

Velo - That's okay I don't mind answering questions I just hope that I'm clear because half the time I have a tendency to ramble and swap thoughts midstream.

Xani didn't hit Sara because she said something to him, broke the spell. He was angry because he's upset with what happened with Barin. Barin left him (something that comes up again and again) and Xani can't handle that by himself. He can't talk to his master and he now can't talk with Sara. He knows he did the wrong thing with Juli but his reaction is one of anger at Sara because she isn't instantly forgiving him, she's making him own up to what he did wrong. For some people that's really hard to handle. They don't like what they did wrong to be pointed out, or to be compared to someone they think is infinitely worse. Does that make sense?

Xani is an actor, there is no denying it. Sara is right though, his anger was real and he just masked it when he realised what he was doing and how much of himself he was giving her.

I could get into the psychology of an abusive relationship or the way in which Xanatos needs Sara, but I might leave that for another day.

Thanks for the compliment. One day I'll write a post where you'll really see how nice Xani can be.

SiriLVR - Thanks We try and tug those heart strings, and hopefully make you think at the same time.

Miana - Yep. That's one of the things. Sara has the power because with the knife she's a bigger threat, but she lets it go.


I think we should encourage HaiGan to post more often!


Kithera

 

Truthfullness

by Kit'

****

?Sara.?

He?

?Sara??

How dare he?

?Sara, are you listening??

and Juli?

?Sara? Hello??

Oh Xani? why did you have to do it? Why did you have to lie?

?Sara??

?Whaa?? Sara looked up in astonishment to see Charly smiling at her, brown eyes warm and kind. She hadn?t seen Charly since well, since the thing with Xani and that had been four days ago.

?You were off in dream land.? Charly said, ?What were you thinking about??

?Xani.? Sara replied. Funny how that hurt less now. It was like touching a fading bruise, it still made you wince but you knew the pain was going away. Charly?s smile faded for a second at the wistfully sad look on Sara?s face and then brightened again as Sara glanced at her. The brown-haired girl wound one finger through her fine hair and gave another one of her small bright smiles. Sara didn?t think she had ever seen Charly without a smile on her face. The two began walking down the stairs towards the lower levels containing not only the crèche but also the cafeteria.

?Has he apologised for the incident with Juli?? Charly asked and Sara had to shake her head, biting her lip as she did so. She had avoided him like a unwanted chore for days now by eating in the cafeteria and studying in the library. She had managed to stave off Qui-Gon's concerned looks by telling him that she wanted to improve her grades. It was a half truth and that was all. It wasn?t as if Xani hadn?t tried to talk to her. There had been flowers and small presents that Qui-Gon wouldn?t notice left behind. A couple of times he had tried to catch her eye, tried to talk to her but she had managed to avoid him. Despite this, Sara found herself longing that things could go back to the way they had been before Juli, before Barin had left and before he had almost hit her. She wanted him back desperately, but didn?t want to give in to what he had done. She wanted his arms around her, wanted him to tell her that everything was alright. She wanted him back, and as much as she hated herself for thinking that, she knew it was true. She sighed miserably and then tried a small weak smile at Charly?s suddenly concerned face.

?Are you going to eat at the cafeteria?? Sara asked moving away from the topic of Xanatos.

?No.? Charly screwed up her nose making the freckles scrunch up too, and gave Sara a look of disgust. ?Not unless I want to get food poisoning and end up at the healers. As much as I admire An-Paj, I don?t like him when he is carrying a large stomach pump that?s aimed at me.?

Sara giggled at the mental image of An-Paj stalking the dim healing halls, stomach pump in hand ready to spring on innocent padawans back from the refectory. For a moment, Charly?s joke made her forget about Xani. It was only a moment though, and soon the thoughts were back. Sara tried one more smile, but it faltered and she glanced at the ground.

?Maybe you could eat at my house,? Charly suggested, ?I?m sure my Master wouldn?t mind.?

?Really?? Sara said looking up at her. The idea of spending a night away from Master Jinn?s apartment and Xani was almost too much.

?Sure.? Charly said. ?Let me check with her first, though. Why don?t I meet you in five minutes at the bottom of these stairs? That way I can check and run back before you get bored!?

Sara grinned at her new friend. Mentally she crossed her fingers, hoping that Charly?s master would say yes.

?See you in five minutes then.? Charly said racing off down the corridor. Sara watched her retreating back and then turned to find a good spot to sit down and wait for Charly?s return. Sara was just about to sit down when she heard Juli?s harsh grating laughter.

?Why if it isn?t Xani?s little pet, or should I say ex-pet.? Juli sneered in a loud voice. Sara turned keeping a tight control of her emotions; she wasn?t going to let Juli see that she had hurt her. Juli stood in the middle of the landing, hands on her hips. She was dressed as if she had just been out

 

Still sad really sad.Sara jealus (sp) oof juli i think realy jeealus.(sp)

 

Bad Juli! Bad bad Juli!

What an evil heartless... Well you get the idea. I'm glad to see that Charley doesn't believe her, and plans on going after Sara to see what happened.

And I guess I know that Sara doesn't have a choice when it comes to Xani, but she should. She should at least be able to know her own mind and make her own decisions. Xani's just too strong yet needy for her.

 

I like how you blended in real life situations with starwars fiction in several sections. There are many interesting concepts and the characterization is excellent.

The conversations are very well written and the way the children talk is very realistic.

I liked this part in FRIENDS:

A group of children were playing in the clear space in the middle of the room, acting out a fantasy of castles, princesses and dashing knights. Building-blocks and datapads became gleaming towers, flying flimsyplast flags snapping in an imaginary wind. The smallest of them held center stage, spinning stories about their make-believe, creating images with words.

I liked this part in FEELINGS:

"Children, please!"

The assistant was close to tears. She shouldn't have been alone with so many. She had only started a week ago. Surely Jedi Initiates shouldn't be so boisterous? She tried to release her tension into the Force and project calming waves at the youngsters, but it was hard with the noise and the chaos, and she didn't dare close her eyes to help herself concentrate. Things were out of control as it was.


I liked the dialogue concerning whether fairies exist or not and the Jedi and the Force in Fairy Tails:


"'Cos there's no such things as fairies," said Kurtas as he bounded past the end of Barin's bed and hastily stopped when he spotted Yaddle's gentle glare.

"Is too!" Nat protested.

"How do you know?" Barin asked the newcomer with a slight tilt of his head.

"Nobody's ever seen a fairy. They don't exist," Kurtas stated flatly.

Barin was unperturbed. "Have you ever seen the smell of a flower?"

"'Course not," Kurtas said scornfully, hopping onto the bed and worming his way in between Xanatos and Nat. "What's that got to do with it?"

"Just because we are made of stuff we can see and touch..." Barin gently pinched Nat's nose to illustrate, and the younger boy giggled. "...does not mean that anything we cannot see does not exist. There might be people made of other stuff. Stuff we are not able to see."




"Why should we think we know everything, just because we are Jedi? Just because we are Jedi does not mean we are special. There are lots of things in the Galaxy that are much more wonderful than... than a few people who can use the Force. How about the Force, even- that has to be pretty amazing to do all the things that all the Jedi in the Galaxy do. How about a star? Just one star can keep billions and billions of people alive and warm and fed, just by being there. Jedi are not important when you think about that. We are just tiny dots in a great big universe."


I liked the themes of friendship and success in PRACTICE:

"Come on, Xan, you can do it!" Barin grinned down at his friend, then turned two cartwheels along the high practice wall that marched almost half the width of the end of the training-room, and finished with a roundoff. "See? Easy!"

Xanatos still looked dubious. The thin line of grip-finished firmaplas looked awfully high. He might fall off, and then he'd look stupid???????.. A good and realistic portrayal of how one thinks.

I liked the bit of humour here:


"'Do or do not,'" quoted Xanatos, wiggling his hands like ears at the side of his head.

Barin laughed. "Do, then. Come on. Just imagine you are down on the low wall. You are good at pretending. I will be right here to help you."



I liked these parts in DECISIONS:

Juli looked at the boy as if he'd suddenly turned into a Hutt. "Ew!"

"Being a Jedi is not a competition, Xan," Barin told him with amusement. "It is not about beating other people."

"I want to be the best knight," Xanatos said quietly. "Like Lord Telesian. I'll be the best, and they'll all follow me into battle to bring peace, and I'll be wise and just and everyone will come to me for advice."

It was a close thing, drawn out because the two fighters had been former sparring partners on several occasions and were familiar with the style and tricks of

 

Here's a measly little reply compared to a humongous one...

Er... I liked it?

Bad Xani Bad Xani!

 

Siri Thanks

Mouse You hit the nail on the head girl! That's exactly the problem and unfortunately it just happens to be the case in many real life relationships too.

Keeper of Swords WoW! Thanks for that, it's interesting to go read the little excerpts objectively. That must of taken some time... Thank you for the compliments

Darsha - Mmm, Bad Xani alright.



*

The next post is a revised one as well (its be edited and changed). I think you might change your opinion (or cement it further)of several characters over the next bit. I'm still not happy with this post in its current form, but I've rewritten it several times to little effect.

Just another quick question, would people like me to PM them when I post stuff up? Or would you like to find it yourself when you want to?


Kithera

 

Closer To The Edge

By Kit'

***


?Is Sara here please?? The young girl at the door asked Xani, her brown eyes bright regarding him with distaste.

?Sure,? he replied briefly wondering why this girl disliked him so much, ?but she might not want to talk to you. She hasn?t been feeling well recently.?

?Just tell her that Charly is here and I want to talk to her.? The girl said firmly. He nodded and turned away from her into the house.

Sara was still not talking to him, despite the three days that had passed since the incident in the kitchen. He had tried to apologise but she had ignored him completely. The incident with Juli hadn't been his fault. He'd be forced into it, tricked by Juli into kissing her. It wasn't his fault, but Sara wouldn't listen to him. The incident in the kitchen had made it worse, and he knew that, but she?d pushed him past the point of anger. She had brought up a subject she knew would hurt him, had done it almost maliciously and therefore he had been justified in the way that he had snapped back at her. Despite the fact that he knew it was her fault, he didn?t want Sara to be angry at him. Even if she was the one who had made him angry by mentioning?him. He clenched his fists and the memory of the boy who had betrayed him, had left him. Now he only had Sara. She was the only person he could trust. She was the only person who cared about him.

?Sara?? He asked as he knocked on the door. There was no answer, but that was normal for the last couple of days, ?Sara, Charly is here.?

There was silence for a few minutes and then the door opened to let Sara through, she didn?t even glance once at him as she strode past into the lounge room her face a blank mask. Something inside Xani snapped and he lashed out, his hand catching her around the wrist.

?Sara.? He pleaded softly. ?Why won?t you talk to me??

?Let me go.? Sara said her voice dangerous. He didn?t instead his grip tightened on her wrist.

?Not until you tell me what I?ve done.? Xani said.

?You?re nothing but a liar. You don?t care about me, you despise me.? Sara said. ?You?re only nice because you want someone to fawn up to you.?

?What? How could you think that?? Xani asked incredulous.

?What else would explain the way you have treated me over the last couple of days?? Sara asked angry, the muscles in her jaw tensed, ?You couldn?t love me and still hurt me.?

?Sara, I didn?t want to hurt you.? Xani said. It was true, he didn?t. He hadn?t thought but she had hurt him my mentioning Barin and what had been worse was that she?d done that deliberately. Had hurt him deliberately. ?I??

?But you don?t love me.? Sara said her face a mask.

?Who would say that?? He was incensed, his bewilderment quickly turning to anger.

?Juli. She told me what you really were, told me that you despised me and loved her.?

?Juli?? His astonishment was so great that he dropped her wrist long enough for Sara to run to the door. For a few minutes Xani sat stunned in total silence. It had been Juli who had done it, who had turned Sara against him. Silently Xani picked up his cloak and left the room.

*

He found Juli by herself, standing on the veranda of a training room watching the cars go past. Her back was towards him and so she didn?t see him coming until he had his hands on her shoulders. He whipped her around, his fingers digging into the soft flesh under her collar bone as hard as he could. It was the only thing that kept him from snapping, from throwing her off the building.

?Xani.? Juli cried in delight not seeming to care about the pain he knew he was causing her. ?Come back for seconds?? She asked.

Something inside him broke and without thinking his fingers had wrapped themselves around her neck and he was slamming her backwards against the wall of the Temple. Red mist clouded his vision but he pushed it away.

?Ooo Xani,? Juli cooed in delighted pain, ?I like it when you play rough with me.?

?Stay away from her.? Xani growled. The red mist was began to seep into the

 

Oh yea Juli got what she deserved.Great keep it up.

 

*Starts applauding Xani*

Well, Juli does deserve it... But dangit, Xani, just PICK ONE and STICK TO IT.

 

Juli deserved it. And stop calling Bar a cockroach!!!

 

Okay... I will applaude Xani for what he did to Juli. She deserved it, but I also have a feeling that she's also treading close to insanity.

Closer to the Edge is a perfect title for the way Xani's acting. I caught his little 'not yet' and it gave me a chill up my spine. But I also caught Xani's reasoning that Sara being mad at him and causing him to act toward her as her fault. That she hurt him deliberately by mentioning Barin. Now that was creepy!

 

Siri - Thanks

Miana - I think Xani's generally chosen Sara, what really happened in the training room you'll just have to guess at!

Darsha - There's reasons why Juli calls Barin "the cockroach". Thanks

Mouse2 - She is, but then I don't think Juli would recieve a lot of support from her Master, and she's certainly not recieving it from her friends. Xani's thought that Sara made him angry is something that seems to happen a lot in this type of relationship, but you're right...it is creepy Thanks for still reading!


*

Just to let people know, this will be the last post for a while as I'm going on holidays until Thursday. That means that there won't be another post until Saturday.

This post is also a "never before seen" snapshot too and hasn't been posted anywhere in the Chronicles before too.


Just want to thank Leona for beta reading it for me (as she's done for many of the new Snapshots).

Kithera

 

The Beginning

by Kit'

****

?Sara?? Master Adu-reil called from the lounge. Inside her room, Sara dragged on one boot after the other. Adu-reil had come home early from the conference, complaining about the food, bedding and anything else that sprang to mind. Part of Sara was glad to get away from Xanatos, Juli and the whole uncomfortable, stomach churning situation of the last couple of weeks but at the same time some other part of her wanted to be back in his arms, with him stroking her hair telling her that it was all going to be alright. It was like a war in her head that controlled everything she did, that sprang on her unawares at the worst possible moment. ?Sara, hurry up! We need to start meditation now if you are going to get to class on time.? Adu-reil called from the front room again. Wearily Sara sighed and went to meet her master. The door to her room opened just before she got there, and wrinkled face of her master peered at her. ?Just making sure you were out of bed.? Adu-reil said cheerily, ?We?ve got a lot to do today before first tea.?

Sara nodded trying not to let her unhappiness show on her face. She followed her master into the lounge and tried to settle herself on one of the oversized cushions that Adu-reil insisted they use for meditation. She said the cushions made it easier to balance and meditate, but Sara suspected it was more today with her master?s increasing fragility then anything else. She tried to focus on her breathing, letting the world come in but not acknowledging the sounds or thoughts that rushed through her head. Sara had been meditating like this for almost her life. Initiates in the toddlers creche were taught the basics, so by rights she should have been able to meditate anywhere, even in a busy, crowded street. Not today. Sara couldn?t get the thought of Xani out of her mind, it made her angry in a way she couldn?t even begin to comprehend. It also made her stomach ache with wanting him not to be angry with her, to care about her again. Her hand twitched as she continually forced the barrage of images from her mind, she couldn?t let them go. She shifted in her seat.

?Sara?? Adu-reil inquired from the other side of the room, ?is everything alright??

She opened her eyes to find her master peering at her again, more concerned then before.

?I?m alright, I guess,? Sara mumbled trying to plaster a smile over what sounded like an unconvincing lie, ?I just have a headache.?

?Hmmm,? Adu-reil frowned at her, ?Come here.?

Diligently Sara stood and crossed the room, her master raised a frail, hand to her forehead for a moment and her frown deepened.

?You haven?t got a fever, but you do look a little peaky. Perhaps I should get something for that.? Slowly and stiffly her master made her way off the pillow and into the her bedroom. There was the sound of things being moved and shifted and a minute later Adu-reil reappeared with a bottle of small white pills. ?Take one of these, and then go lie down before your classes. It?s best not to meditate with a headache, I?ve always found that if you can?t focus then you can?t get it right. If you can?t get it right then it isn?t worth doing at all.?

?Yes Master,? Sara replied dutifully heading towards the kitchen.

?I got these while I was on the conference,? Adu-reil was saying behind her, almost to herself, ?they?re good for pain and a bit of a pick me up too. Now, I?ll be in the library if you need me.?

In the kitchen, Sara poured herself a glass of water and tried to push the thoughts of Xani away again. As she raised the glass to her mouth, a shiver ran down her spine, but Sara ignored it. It was a headache tablet, nothing more.

*

Saying goodbye to her friends, Sara headed her home after lightsabre practice. She felt euphoric, the last two weeks pushed out of her mind. As she climbed the last set of stair she felt the energy start to drain out of her, replaced by the fears and concerns of this morning. The door to the apartment slid open to reveal a black interior. It w

 

It was a headache tablet, nothing more.

EEP FORESHADOWING!

Uh oh... Sara, step away from the pills!!!!

Great job!

 

Holy Tamole!

It all started with a 'headache pill' that her MASTER gave her! And I know it's safe to bet that her master never notices anything or realizes what she's done.

Sara needs someone to TALK TO! To notice that she's upset and something is wrong! Not someone with a quick fix. Grrrr!

Incredible post Kit'! Have fun on your holiday!

 

don't think about don't get away from those pills Sara.Reallly good.

 

Never trust pills. Take the good old herbal brew.

 

Oh, the last few posts have been wonderful, angsty and sad. Trying to catch up...

On truthfulness, Juli is not a Jedi. She is a child, selfish, willful, vindictive and full of darkness. The rape has only solidified her vicious nature. She needs serious help but is unlikely to get it. Trapped in her own dark cage.

On Closer to the Edge, I can certainly see why you called it this. Both Xan and Juli seem to swirl with darkness - almost as if they were edging each other towards destruction. I especially liked ?I?m not like Barin.? Xanatos answered softly, ?unlike him, I don?t do things by halves.? Very shivery and good foreshadowing.

On the new snapshot The Beginning, I can see that Sara doesn't understand about taking more than she should. Her master had said one pill, not two and she took them for all the wrong reasons. Not a good thing to do. Another good post.

 

Kit?, thanks for answering my questions. I get it now. *sigh.* I?m so dense. Your explanation makes a lot of sense.

I?d love to hear what you know about the psychology of an abusive relationship or the way in which Xanatos needs Sara, but only if you have time.

truthfulness. So sad. I feel sorry for Juli and Sara. I?m glad that Charly doesn?t quite believe Juli.

closer to the edge Gee, Xan wants to turn his anger on and off? Allow it full rein later on when he wants it? Stupid boy. Or is it the darkside, not merely anger?

the beginning Uh oh. I hope Sara sorts things out. Or gets help. How old is Adu-Reil again? I thought that she?s a temporary Master for Sara.

Sorry about the crappy replies. I don?t know what to say. I wish Barin came back. I?ve just finished reading You can run but you can?t hide last night, and I really, really want more of Barin. Thom, too.

~Velo

 

Miana - Yep, foreshadowing is what we do best

Leona - Thanks

Mouse - I did It was a great time, if you ever get down here I'll show you just how beautiful our dry, dusty country can be.

Siri - Thanks

Darsha - I don't think it's the pills themselves but Sara's use of them that is the problem

Dianethx - You're spot on about Juli. She is a child, but one made from both her personality and the way in which her master and the temple have dealt with her. These aren't some isolated issues that are prompting Xani and Juli towards the edge but symptoms of an infection that is a lot deeper and widespread then anyone wants to see.

Velo - I promise I'll explain my understanding of it at some stage (just my understanding mind you) but I'll do it when I have a little more time and energy then I do now. Xani is edging closer to the darkside but he thinks he's still got control - he can stop anytime he wants to. Adu-reil is about sixty and she was supposed to be temporary but like a lot of things, temporary often turns permanent. You can find more snapshots of Thom and Barin on hellschancecantina.com


New post in a minute, but just wanted to spare a thought for the people in London. Someone said this morning that we spend too much times arguing over our differences then celebrating our similarities and with that I agree.

Kithera


Edit: Should mention that the title of the next snapshot is a title taken off a great Aussie band's latest CD. When I remember who it was I'll post it.

 

Chills, Thrills and Sunday Pills

by Kit'

***

A Jedi should not steal

?Sara, have you seen those tablets I brought back?? Adu-reil called from the front of the apartment. Guiltily Sara turned the little bottle over in her hand and then tucked it under her mattress. She?d gone through them all in little less then a week. The whole bottle of little white pills disappeared inside her. What was worse was that every time she?d told herself it would be the last, and yet it had seemed to only make her want them more, until her thoughts were consumed with the idea of them. Those little white tablets strolled and rolled through her thoughts, flashed behind her eyes when she fell asleep. ?Sara?? Adu-reil poked her head around the door frame. Sara plastered a sickly sweet smile on her fact that she just didn?t feel.

A Jedi should not lie

?I haven?t seen them Master.? The lie made her bite her tongue with the very idea of it. Her hand began to shake and she clenched her fist until her nails cut into her palm.

?Are you alright?? The old lady asked from the door, ?you don?t look very well.?

?I?m fine.? Another lie, sounding pathetic to her own ears. Adu-reil pursed her lips and moved slowly and carefully into her padawan?s room. Sara?s stomach roiled as she came closer. Now she was done for, the lie would be discovered. Under her mattress the pill bottle felt hard and uncomfortable. Her hands trembled and she clenched them together on top of her lap, trying to quell the feeling that her guilt was as obvious as a lit torch in a darkened room.

A Jedi feels only calm

Adu-reil put one of her own trembling, wrinkled hands to Sara?s forehead. She made a little clucking noise and Sara tried not to squirm under the pressure.

A Jedi feels only peace

?You don?t look well, but you aren?t running a fever.? Adu-reil said with concern.

?See, I told you I?m fine.? Sara said her voice sounding over bright. She got up from the bed, expecting the little bottle to fall out and proclaim itself to the world. Her arms shook, and she tried to cross them quickly before Adu-reil noticed. Too late. The old master made an annoyed sound.

?Sara you?re shaking!?

?I?m just cold, Master. Really.? Sara lied again.

?I think you?re sickening for something.? Adu-reil proclaimed, ?go down and see An-Paj.?

?Really Master?? Sara pleaded with her Master, ?I?ve got so much work to do.?

?I think that?s part of the problem. You?ve been working too hard lately. You?ll go straight down and see An-Paj now.?

?But Master?? Sara tried once more, but it only seemed to make Adu-reil more decided in her choice.

?Go, and I?ll check with him later to see what he said.? Adu-reil pointed towards the door, her posture making it clear to Sara that on this account there would be no argument. Pouting, Sara followed her directions making her way towards the door. She was done for.

*

A Jedi feels no anger

She was still grumbling by the time she found herself in the temple infirmary. Her stupid master had no idea what she was talking about. Sara reluctantly hung around the outer edges of the waiting room, trying not to be noticed. She folded her arms to try to stop the shaking, and after a while it lessened. Now though she couldn?t get the thought of the pills from her mind. Her mouth started to go dry and after a while she gave up her pretence of trying to be invisible and just sat on the seat. Now she didn?t feel very well at all, she could only think about the pills and where she could get some more from. Finally the last of the knights and cold-ridden padawans were dealt with and An-Paj came out and gave her an inquiring look. His little blue antennae swivelling in her direction.

?Well, Sara??

?My master thinks I?m getting sick.? Sara said sulkily.

?Well, you?d better come in then.? An-Paj said motioning inside the examination room. Sara got up, trying not to be too obvious that she was deliberately dragging her feet to get i

 

*Hugs Sara*

Great job!!!