main
side
curve
  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Before - Legends Misplaced Perceptions (Obi-Wan / Bruck) Complete (Author Replies 5/18)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Bekah_K, Nov 15, 2004.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. shanobi

    shanobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 11, 2001
    No need to worry Bekah, it was great, and nice and long too :)

    I think it makes perfect sense that Obi-Wan took a bit longer to come around. Bruck really hurt him, and was responsible for huring those he cared about. It's hard to just let go of something like that. Yet he is maturing and learning to trust in the Force. I like what Qui-Gon said - that the Force only knows the truth, and will never lead you astray. Very nice.

    Nice twist, to have Aalto escape on his own. You're pulling things together very nicely and this has been a joy to read. Patiently awaiting more :)

    --shan
     
  2. PadawanKitara

    PadawanKitara Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 31, 2001
    oops- missed a chapter. I hope this means the poor kid will be rescued soon.
     
  3. shanobi

    shanobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 11, 2001
    Upping in the hopes of a posty very soon..... :)

    --shan
     
  4. Bekah_K

    Bekah_K Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 3, 2002
    Kynstar: Thanks! :)

    OE: Obi's coming around! ;)

    jacen: They're on their way. :)

    maychorian: So cool that Aalto escaped on his own! He has motivation now, a stubborn master and a friend. ;) With Aalto's escape, Kaden's plans may have to change.

    diane: The boys may be letting go of misperceptions, but old behavioral habits die hard. :)

    darkest_angel: [face_laugh] Thanks for reading!

    shan: I've a bit more written if you want a peek. Although I don't remember where the last post I e-mailed left off. Interested? o_O I've also started on the second bunny. Not too far into it yet but started none the less. :)

    PK: [face_mischief]

    shan: Thanks for the up! I've been so caught up with so many things lately that when I saw it it hit me that I needed to update. :p


    Author's Note: I know it's been a while since I posted last. Life has been busy. We moved recently and all my time has been wrapped up in that. On a sour note as a result of the move, my Internet has been down graded from DSL to dial-up. So I've had some problems of being able to stay logged in for a fair amount of time.

    Now for a fairly long post...


    Chapter 16

    Representative Feld assured the Jedi that they had his full support in their search for their missing padawan. He generously offered a number of his best soldiers to accompany them but the Jedi graciously refused. Saying their goodbyes, the two masters took the proffered speeder and began their search.

    Jai paused on the west end of town bringing the speeder to an abrupt halt.

    ?What do you think??

    ?I think this is where the Force is leading us,? Qui-Gon hopped out with a grace born of a man much younger than himself. Scanning the area for any threat, the two began walking east.

    ~ ~ * ~ ~

    Aalto shifted within the confines of his makeshift hideaway. The heat from his body had encompassed the area of his temporary shelter creating a warm environment; however, that did little to warm the boy himself. Shivering, he pulled his good leg closer to his chest as he attempted to wrap his arms around it for warmth.

    I want to go home. He silently admitted although he would never say it aloud. From somewhere in the deep recesses of his mind he heard an answer to his lone request.

    Together we will go home, padawan. Tears finally escaped after having been held back for so long. He tightly shut his eyes and took several deep breaths. If that whisper of air was indeed real and not a hallucination of his fevered mind, then he would be well placed as a good padawan should be when his master showed up.

    A small rock tumbled through the curtain of water and into his safe haven. He froze. His eyes widening at the sound of shouts carried through the loud roaring wave. Rocking back and forth, he prayed to the Force that they would pass him by.

    ~ ~ * ~ ~

    Callen felt a sudden surge of uncertainty through the weakened link he shared with his apprentice. Hurrying his steps without thought to the two padawans following in his wake, he began to run toward the source of discomfort.

    Bruck and Obi-Wan quickened their pace falling into step directly behind the much taller Jedi Master. Kenobi sent a quick message to Qui-Gon before resuming his focus on their present circumstance.

    ~ ~ * ~ ~

    Qui-Gon paused briefly as he took in what Obi-Wan was telling him.

    ?They?re heading our direction. Cal?s picked up the pace,? he relayed to Jai.

    Jai looked back over his shoulder, ?We?ll meet them in the middle. He must have picked up on Aalto?s position.?

    ~ ~ * ~ ~

    Callen, Obi-Wan, and Bruck slowed their pace when they heard various voices coming from the area in front of them. Crouching down behind a fallen tree and some brush, Callen signaled for the padawans to remain close.

    Searching the area, he sensed the multitude of life signatures slowly surrounding them; he turned toward the two apprentices whom were in his c
     
  5. maychorian

    maychorian Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 7, 2005
    Ooh! Wonderful, wonderful post! Definitely seeing some battle ahead. Loved how Bruck and Obi formed a bond, weak as it is. Also their hesitance around each other is good. It wouldn't be realistic to have them suddenly drop all their complaints against each other. But this is great--banding together to complete a common goal. Poor Aalto. Hope he recognizes that they're there to help him.
     
  6. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 1, 2002
    You left us with a cliffie - literally!

    I liked that Aalto doesn't know any more about what is happening - he must be getting sicker. And the Masters trying to decide what to do in order to get their Padawans and themselves out of there. I liked that Obi and Bruck had to trust each other enough to make it work.... we hope.

    Good job.
     
  7. Kynstar

    Kynstar Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Mar 2, 2004
    Poor Callen... you know he wanted to take the guy out. Good that he didn't. At least he believes Aalt has escaped :)

    Wow... the boys are going to work together! Man now that's dedication for a friend :D Good to see!! Can't wait for them to be reunited with Aalt!!
     
  8. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 14, 2002
    Good boys! Behaving themselves somewhat. ;) So close! I hope they find Aalto.
     
  9. shanobi

    shanobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 11, 2001
    Awesome post Bekah! I love how you've set this whole scenario up - really adds to the suspense of what's to come.

    Great interaction between Obi and Bruck as well. Love that they had to form this necessary albeit temporary bond - i imagine it will give each a closer and iluminating look at the other as well.

    Both Obi and Bruck seem to be trying, but it's obvious they still do not like each other by the quipping back and forth. STill, it is obvious they are coming to respect - if not like each other. You've done a really good job showing this!

    Can't wait for more! And speaking of that sneak peek ;) I'll PM you on that ;)

    --shan
     
  10. jacen200015

    jacen200015 Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 11, 2002
    Go Obi! Go Bruck! :)
     
  11. darkest_angel

    darkest_angel Jedi Youngling

    Registered:
    Dec 10, 2004
    Great Post!!!
     
  12. PadawanKitara

    PadawanKitara Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 31, 2001
    Hurray for Obi and Brick... did I just say hurray for Bruck? :eek:
     
  13. Bekah_K

    Bekah_K Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 3, 2002
    maychorian: We'll see Aalto's reaction today. ;)

    diane: The boys aren't as prepared for their little adventure as they'd like to think. [face_mischief]

    Kynstar: Callen didn't get as far from the confrontation as he would've liked.

    OE: They can be good when they need to. :D

    shan: I didn't think it would be believable if they didn't still have some issues between them. They may have come to different conclusions concerning where they are now, but that doesn't erase certain habits that set in a long time before. :)

    jacen: :)

    darkest_angel: Thanks! :)

    PadawanKitara: ...did I just say hurray for Bruck? :D You sure did!



    Chapter 17

    Qui-Gon released his frustration into the force. Sighing heavily, he stopped and took in their surroundings. Trees for miles and miles it seemed. Jai paused next to him.

    ?They could be anywhere. Have you heard from Obi-Wan? Do you know his location??

    Shaking his head, Qui-Gon replied, ?It?s distorted. What about Bruck??

    ?It?s hazy. The Living Force is so strong within these woods that it?s interfering with our connection to the boys.?

    Qui-Gon nodded in agreement. He could feel each and every life form within the surrounding area. The trees sung in merriment at the wonder of the sun above. The animals scurried to and fro gathering food and returning it to their shelter. The wind blew steadily, a gentle breeze to cool their brow. ?If our situation wasn?t so dire, I would plant myself down right here and enjoy the wonderment of this place.?

    Jai laughed lightly and tugged on Qui-Gon?s sleeve. ?Come on, let?s keep moving.?

    A few miles farther into the clutches of the forest the Force nudged Corwin to listen. ?Water,? he breathed.

    ?What??

    Jai looked over to his companion and repeated, ?Water.? Turning his head, he focused on the splashing sound. ?A waterfall to be precise,? he elaborated. ?Come on, this way.?

    ~ ~ * ~ ~

    A massive stone garden stood at the end of his path. He ducked behind one of the memorials and waited out the inevitable. It wouldn?t be long until his pursuers caught up. Searching the sandstone plot, he vaguely wondered if this were a natural formation or if someone had purposely created this lot. Noting the points of escape, he climbed up onto the highest rock formation and sat waiting. Stretching along the now muddled bond he shared with his padawan, he found his apprentice in a troubled slumber. Sharing as much warmth as he could manage to pass through the constricted link, he enveloped his padawan within the arms of the force and withdrew.

    Hushed whispers could be heard all around. Callen listened intently as the leader of the group stepped into the garden. Kaden searched through each opened pathway for any signs of disturbance that the Jedi had gone through. Seeing nothing that would indicate any type of commotion, he proceeded with caution. His troop spread out surrounding the area with what few soldiers they had left. After their last encounter with the Jedi Master, they were no longer about to take for granted the ease of their young charge?s capture.

    Kaden moved forward, blaster in hand. Quietly the remaining squadron crept around each rock formation searching high and low. Callen waited patiently, jumping from one stone configuration to the next. Silently he leapt, taking out the band of mercenaries one by one. He despised with every ounce of his being having to take these lives, but he could no longer preserve what was so adamant on self-destruction. He prayed to a higher power for each and every one, asking that it have mercy upon them.

    One by one the warriors silently fell, the bodies hidden behind the massive structure within the center of the plot. Having removed the last obstacle, Callen sought out the man that had taken his apprentice. Zarek watched as Kaden rounded the configuration. Stopping in his tracks, Kaden?s eyes grew wide. A howl of fury was released from deep within the rebel. Turning at the sn
     
  14. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 14, 2002
    :eek: Excellent scene there between the three boys! Very intense. So glad the Masters turned up in time to help the boys land safely. I hope Aalto snaps out of it before he hurts his best friend. [face_worried]
     
  15. Kynstar

    Kynstar Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Mar 2, 2004
    Yay! The Masters saved them! But... oh man... who's to save Aalto from himself? :( poor guy...

    Uh oh looks like the Masters have probs of their own as well as Callen. *Chews on fingernails* Man what a cliffy!
     
  16. jeday

    jeday Jedi Youngling star 2

    Registered:
    Jan 4, 2004
    I wonder too how this will turn out! :D
    Again a great post. =D=
     
  17. maychorian

    maychorian Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 7, 2005
    Whoa, that was excellent! Can't wait to see what happens between Callen and the bad guy. Hope the masters reach the boys soon, and that Aalto comes back to something of himself. Poor kiddo. At least Obi and Bruck are with him now. Loved all the action. Keep it coming!
     
  18. shanobi

    shanobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 11, 2001
    This was great Bekah! Loved the part with the boys falling and the master's having to help them safely down :)

    Lots of serious stuff going on - you're doing great going from scene to scene and giving us a front row seat to everyone's emotions.

    Poor Aalto - the padawan interactions are wonderful!

    --shan

     
  19. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 1, 2002
    Great stuff. I especially liked the last scene with Aalto being so confused that he was attacking his friend. Loved the force being used as an cushion. Good job.
     
  20. Bekah_K

    Bekah_K Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 3, 2002
    OE: Thanks! :)

    Kynstar: Things get settled a bit with this post. ;)

    jeday: Thank you! :)

    maychorian: Callen's confrontation ends today. [face_mischief]

    shan: ...you're doing great going from scene to scene and giving us a front row seat to everyone's emotions. Thanks! [face_blush] I think I'm finally getting a handle on writing from this point of view.

    diane: I especially liked the last scene with Aalto being so confused that he was attacking his friend. The old saying is 'We hurt the ones we love'...It seemed more appropriate for Aalto to launch his confusion and anger out on Bruck than it did Obi. :)



    Chapter 18

    Silence stretched between them as they waited for the other to make the first move. Callen stood tall, his stance relaxed, a deceitful image to someone who didn?t know better.

    Tossing aside his blaster, Kaden pulled two vibroblades from the belt at his waist and tossed one to Zarek. ?Now we?re even.?

    Catching the blade with ease, Callen smirked. ?It would appear so.?

    ?Ah, but appearances can be deceiving,? Kaden continued as if the Jedi had not spoken. ?We will finish this on equal footing. No tricks Jedi,? he emphasized the word knowing his point would be well taken.

    ?No tricks,? Zarek agreed.

    Kaden slowly began circling his opponent. ?Now that we have that settled perhaps I should let you in on a secret.?

    Callen stood his ground, neither rotating ? as Kaden disappeared from view as he walked behind him in a wide circle ? nor physically reacting to the bait Kaden was joyfully throwing out in the open. ?And what would that be??

    ?The little Jedi was a lot like you. He held fast to his beliefs and to his training, that is until he was pushed a bit too far. See I?ve learned that even Jedi have their breaking point.?

    Callen?s anger resurfaced causing him to take a moment to release his emotions. Going into battle distracted would do him no good.

    Receiving no answer from his prey, Kaden continued, ?If a being is kicked around enough, told their no good long enough, half starved long enough, and in poor environmental conditions, that being will do about anything to regain its freedom.?

    ?You do realize that speaking is only delaying your death, do you not?? Callen calmly replied as if he were bored with the whole situation.

    ?What is it you Jedi are so afraid of?? Kaden persisted, ?ah, yes, the dark side. I was informed that once it took hold there was no going back. Is that true??

    Callen didn?t like the direction this conversation was going and yet he was curious. ?That?s what I?ve been told. However, there are many Jedi who have touched it and returned with no ill affects.?

    Stopping in front of the Jedi, Kaden looked his foe in the eye. ?Remorse must play a part in that recovery, no? No one can go through something like that without it affecting their life in one way or another. Unless of course they become indifferent, as is the case with said little Jedi. Killing in a fit of rage and having a hollow vacant look tells me he has no remorse for his actions.?

    Callen stepped forward threateningly, ?And who are you to judge??

    Kaden smiled, ?You know the little Jedi I speak of,? he stated.

    Swallowing through a tight throat, Callen pressed his advantage until he stood toe to toe with his adversary, ?I heard he escaped.?

    Kaden?s smile vanished. Pushing Callen back he launched himself toward the Jedi. Falling on his backside Callen quickly raised his hands and feet as he saw Kaden flying toward him. Using his appendages, Zarek flipped Kaden over him and onto the ground. Quickly gathering his discarded blade, Callen waited. The militia leader rolled over, his hand reaching up toward his lip gently touching the damp area. He lowered his hand to find a smidge of blood on his index finger. Looking back to the Jedi, he allowed his hand to grab a handful of dirt, rocks, and debris before rising to stand. Callen stood a little ways back, watching intently. Kaden threw his b
     
  21. Kynstar

    Kynstar Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Mar 2, 2004
    Oh man!! Talk about intense!

    Yay! Aalt felt his Master's presence! And the two connected! Oh man... :( is he gonna be all right??

    Great action scene! Loved how Kaden was toying with Zarek there :D The Master kept his cool somewhat ;)

    Excellent work! I bet Obi is relieved ;)
     
  22. maychorian

    maychorian Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 7, 2005
    Ooh, cool. Aalto and Callen saved each other. Very, very nice.

    So the masters are having some trouble controlling themselves, are they? :D It's fun too push Jedi to the breaking point.

    Looking forward to more!
     
  23. Gkilkenny

    Gkilkenny Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 27, 2004
    Excellent very tense nearly fell off the edge of my chair.

    it's so different seeing Obi and Bruck on the same side.
    [face_good_luck]
     
  24. Bekah_K

    Bekah_K Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 3, 2002
    Kynstar: ...is he gonna be all right? He may have a few problems.

    maychorian: It's fun too push Jedi to the breaking point. Yes it is. :D Even the masters have some lack of control if the right buttons are pushed. ;)

    Gkilkenny: it's so different seeing Obi and Bruck on the same side. Yes, but it's kinda cool to. :)
     
  25. jacen200015

    jacen200015 Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 11, 2002
    I caught up :D I'm glad Obi-Wan and Bruck are being a good team. Even though doing that jump was not excatly the best idea.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.