Mod Squad Update for the Week Ending October 13, 2002

Only room for one what? What did you say?

 

"False Accusations Via PM

This is considered to be an offense of slander and will be treated as such. If a name is defamed without proof, publicly or privately, it will be treated the same. This is policy."


There should be a 24 hour ban for this no matter what. In the Babalyion Kingdom, There was a law code with a law that said:

"If a man tells of a man who put a deathspell on him, but cannot prove it, he shall be put to death."

 

Yes!

Thats what we need around here, more Hammurabi!

If someone flames....well, we can cut off their hands. If someone trolls, we can cut off their legs.

And if they post porn...well, I'm sure you can figure out what to cut off all by yourselves

 

Ah, so you've heard of Hammurabi too great Dagsy.


Remember the rule about if a merchant is robbed, the province or state that he was robbed in shall pay him the cost of the stolen items?

 

If we followed the Code of Hammurabi on these boards, there would be few users left with fingers to type with.

 

LOL@Saipy


Are these boards a Democracy, or are they communist? Or has Griffz turned it into a Anarchy yet?

 

Don't be silly. This is a totalitarian democracy.

 

FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care
of them, and sells you the milk.

PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them,
and you all share the milk.

APPLIED COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the
government takes all the milk.

DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.

MILITARISM: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.

PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to
tell you who gets the milk.

AMERICAN DEMOCRACY: The government promises to give you two cows if you vote
for it. After the election, the president is impeached for speculating in cow
futures. The press dubs the affair "Cowgate." The cow sues you for breach of
contract.

BRITISH DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. You feed them sheep's brains, and they
go mad. The government doesn't do anything.

EUROPEAN DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. At first, the government regulates
what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then, it pays you not to
milk them. After that, it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours
the milk down the drain. Then, it requires you to fill out forms accounting
for the missing cows.

NIGERIAN DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. The government takes both, shoots you
and sends the cows to Zurich.

SINGAPOREAN DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. The government fines you for
keeping two unlicensed farm animals in an apartment.

CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

HONG KONG CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell three of them to your
publicly-listed company, using letters of credit opened by your
brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an
associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax
deduction for keeping five cows. The milk rights of six cows are transferred
via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company secretly owned by
the majority shareholder, who sells the right to all seven cows' milk back to
the listed company. The annual report says that the company owns eight cows,
with an option on one more. Meanwhile, you kill the two cows because of bad
feng shui.

HINDUISM: You have two cows. You give them all your food.

TOTALITARIANISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they
ever existed. Milk is banned.

POLITICAL CORRECTNESS: You are associated with (the concept of 'ownership' is
a symbol of the egocentric, warmongering, intolerant past) two differently
aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of non-specified gender.

COUNTERCULTURE: Wow, dude, there's like...these two cows, man. You have got
to have some of this milk.

SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take
harmonica lessons.

BOSSISM: The boss has the cows. You sweep the manure.

And finally...

TF.NISM: After finding that demand for a place to discuss cows existed, you band together with your friends to discuss cows. Cow-talk becomes so successful that you invite others to discuss cows. Instead they discuss how poorly you and your friends discuss cows. Soon Sheeptalkers and Goatsayers begin infiltrating discussions about cows and begin cow bashing. Discussions of whether hefers or brahmans are more officially a cow overwhelm all discussions as do whether or not the older cows are better than the newer cows and despite the fact that over 900 breeds of bovines exist, there always seem to be at least someone who can't find one he likes. Cowbashing and Cowtipping become the favored entertainment of choice and everyone who just wants to talk about cows is run off.

 

I think I'm a little bit of each of those.

 

Thank you for that, Genghis. I totally cracked up, especially at the American and British parts.

~*~Bria

 

I've seen that, but it's still really funny

 

I've seen parts of it too. But never such a long list or one that ended with TF.Nism.

~*~Bria