Phx Move-in date is no more... PLEASE READ MY LAST POST!!

Well, folks, I am finally doing it! September 8th, I will be moving out of my parents house in Mesa to Hayden Place apartments on Rio Salado, between Hardy and Mill. I'm so excited!! It's a 2 bedroom, 2 bath, 850 sq. ft. I'm moving with my best friend, Kelly... I can't wait!!

So, after the PFF meeting on Saturday, September 13th, we will have a mass migration to our apartment for a housewarming/moving in party, or more of a blowout!! So don't forget to clear your calendars for this day, you'll regret if you miss it!!



PS... any advice on how to tell my parents this news would be GREATLY appreciated...

 

Well CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!

I'm very happy for you MJ, this is a big step, and one in the right direction.

Now as far as telling off...I mean, informing your parents, nothing works better than the truth. "I'm moving out of here and in with a friend. You can help me or not, but you can't stop me." Well, maybe not so harsh (but maybe that's right for the situation). "I'm leaving." "Where are you leaving to?" "I'm moving in with Kelly."

That should be sufficient.

Congrats again!

 

Congrats! I hope it all works out very well .

 

MJ, that is so cool!!!! Im happy that you are getting out of that house!!!


and I think the best way for you to tell them is to simply sit down with them, and look them both in the eye and just say, " i have something to tell you. Im moving out with kelly In september." then be prepred for a whole range of emotions. but also be ready that they may try to talk you out of it. be firm when you tell them.

 

hooyah! way to go, mj! i know how important this is to you, and i'm happy that you were able to pull it off! even better than the december time frame you gave yourself too!

 

sweet. Im in, lol, i can walk from my place to ur place.

 

Sounds great!

Me, I took the subtle approach... Started packing up my stuff, and when they asked, I said, "Oh, didn't I tell you? I got an apartment..." Makes them think it was their own fault for not paying enough attention to you

 

Hmm, Zoo, I like...

 

It's the coawrd's way out, but sometimes that is the best way out too... Plus it gives them a little stick on the way out. And sometimes they need that

 

good to know some people get the things they want. congrats to you.

 

woohoo!!
good deal!

 

Those of you who would like to help in any part of the moving process, please let me know. I'm thinking of having a dinner that night for people who help (gourmet Little Caesars, or the like), so I'll take a tentative headcount and have it updated in August.

 

MJ:
I say, show your parents your excitement and share with them your intentions. Be open to their feelings but don't let it sway your decision. They love you and want the best for you. They have to let go sometime and I'll bet that, if you give them the chance, they'll be there for you. They may not like watching you go, but you're going and they can either support your decision or not. If not, then they will probably change their tune when you show them how well you can do on your own. That's all they are really worried about, I'm sure.

 

Kudoos to you MJ.

Now you're in the big leages.

Have fun at the shindig, that's months away...

 

Wardenx, I do not know all the people involved. In some situations, there are valid reasons for avoiding giving parents notice until the last minute.

MJ-- Are you concerned about what one relationship therapist calls "Change back!" responses? Threats, insults and generally childish behavior (yes) from your parents?

Or are you more concerned that after you announce what your plans, you will be bombarded with descriptions of "big, bad wolves"?

I experienced the latter response.

Be firm. DO NOT insult them or make angry remarks; we know what buttons we should NEVER push in our closest relationships.

Respond in a way that acknowledges their concerns with respect, wit and courage.

Remember to tell them you love them and you appreciate everything they've sacrificed and done for you.

Best of luck and . . .

. . . the Force will be with you, always.

 

MonMartha:
Funny, I thought that's what I said. LOL

 

I will help you move.
*nods head*

 

I didn't mean to rain on your parade, MJ.

When my best friend moved out, her older sister dedicated The Beatles' "She's Leaving Home" (check out the lyrics!) on the radio.

I hope that your situation is different from that of the teenage subject of the song. At least you're waiting until the worst of the heat is in the past! Unlike some people.

"If you can dream it, you can do it."

Go for it.

 

MJ If I were you I'd have all your ducks in a row. Make sure you are ready to give up the things they aren't gonna let you take, and make sure that the things that are important to your being able to do so are in your name (like your car) I mean as controlling as you've said they have been? I would not put it past them to try and use that stuff against you, say something like, well leave, but the car stays, and this stays and that stays... all the stuff that really matters to you (or they think matters to you) in an attempt to keep you in thier control.

You just need to be preparend and really think about what matters and what doesnt and prepare for the worst, hope for the best otherwise, they'll win just by gaining the upper hand on your emotions.

I have learned over the years it doesn't matter what is yours verbally, unless it's in black and white, on paper, signed, sealed and approved... it never happened.

Be honest be straight forward, but also don't give them too much time to ... I hate to use the words scheme or plot... but... come up with ways of discouraging you, or build up barriers. You also should temper it with enough time that you know what they are gonna do, and you don't get a shock if they come pick up the car after you've moved and say it's thiers and you were only "borrowing it" or some such notion..

Hopefully they will just go with the flow and support you in your decision and not make it difficult for you.

 

I have learned over the years it doesn't matter what is yours verbally, unless it's in black and white, on paper, signed, sealed and approved... it never happened.

I second that!

P.S., Do I sound like an eldest child? I am, so I should.

 

So we need to find a new apartment, one that allows small dogs... but we are still shooting for the same time frame to move out, and still planning on having our party...

 

ok, two things:

1)"unattractive" princess of corelia?

2)boys with eyeliner?!?!

 

Yeah... I'm a freak! What can I say? I think it's a theatre thing. My boyfriend wears eyeliner for me sometimes... mmmm... it makes me...happy...

 

Nothing wrong w/ a little makeup on a man. Long hair & earrings are good too, yum!

 

Oh, and good luck w/ the moving thing. I just got married and moved the hell out, not the best move I ever made in life. But what could they say?