Story [Multi-Fandom] Drabble Squadron (1/26: "Synchronicity" (Sapphire & Steel))

Thanks. This one is a bit... sillier.

Title: Taurum Tollet Qui Vitulum Sustulerit
Fandom: Marvel Comics


The figure at the clear Perspex podium stared out into the audience, his eyes scanning the crowd, searching. "I'd like to thank those who supported me when I was younger, who helped guide me and mold me into the man you see before you.

"Even those," he added, "who may have been unaware that this is what they were doing." He raised one gauntleted fist into the air and slammed it back down. "Especially those who were unaware!"

The audience applauded with feigned enthusiasm, every person afraid of what Dr. Doom might do to them if this farcical display ended.

 

It's not easy being a Latverian ...

 

Thanks.

Title: In Morbo Recolligit Se Animus
Fandom: 30 Rock


Kenneth smiled underneath his paper mask as he entered the writers' room with another tureen of chicken soup. Liz and those few of the others still ambulatory lumbered toward him and weakly tried to wrest the soup from his grasp.

Evading them, Kenneth set the tureen on the table and said, "I envy you guys your ability to get sick. My aunt always used to say that sickness was the soul taking a moment to renew itself."

Frank tried swatting at him but wound up merely falling back into his chair, angrily shaking a finger. Kenneth chuckled. "Oh, you kidders!"

 

Title: Dies Infaustus
Fandom: 24


Jack Bauer had experienced worse days - Teri's death, for one - but never one where he'd been kicked so hard by blind, dumb bad luck. This gang of criminals he'd been chasing was the least competent he'd ever come across, but they'd somehow turned that very incompetence into some kind of superpower. Already, seventeen of his colleagues had been killed, half the Valley was on fire, and he'd just spent an hour trapped in a broom cupboard. He'd only been able to escape when the rest of the building collapsed.

And then the call came. "Jack," Chloe said, "my water broke."

 

Title: Experientia Praestantior Arte
Fandom: Doctor Who
Doctor: War


The Doctor slammed both hands on the table, causing the embedded holoprojector to fizzle out. "That is the most idiotic plan I have ever had the misfortune to hear," he shouted, "and I've spent centuries among humans!"

The other Time Lords all turned to Head Strategist at the far end of the table. "The plan is sound. We have run the simulations and-"

"Simulations? Aren't there any Time Lords here who've actually fought in campaigns? Have any of you even been off Gallifrey before?"

One hand started to go up, but the Head Strategist glared, and it went back down.

 

Title: Obsequium Amicos, Veritas Odium Parit
Fandom: Sledge Hammer!


Captain Trunk glared as he concluded, "Of course, organizing this taskforce would've been so much easier if a certain someone hadn't burned most of our bridges with City Hall."

"One bridge! One!" Sledge snorted dismissively. "Of course the politicians down at City Hall don't like me," he said. "I don't spend my time kissing up to their egos or sugarcoating what I have to say. I speak truth to power, Captain. And occasionally shoot at it."

Dori responded, "Sledge, being tactful isn't just kissing up. It's about being polite and careful with..." Seeing his confused expression, she said, "Never mind."

 

Loved this!

Sledge: 'Polite' and 'careful' ain't in my lexicon, Missy!!!

 

Thanks.

Title: Amicus Est Unus Animus in Duobus Corporibus
Fandom: Danger Mouse


Danger sat on the ground and closed his eyes. "Penfold, if we are going to stop Baron Greenback, we need to be in perfect harmony. Join with me, and we shall merge our minds."

"I'd rather not, if it's all the same to-"

"Sit!" Danger commanded, and Penfold sat immediately.

Soon, they were chanting in unison, pushing their conscious minds together. "I can feel it!" Danger shouted. "It's working! I can feel... hungry?"

"Sorry, that's me," Penfold admitted.

Danger said, "I can't think of anything but going out for a curry right now."

"Me too! I'll drive!"

"No, I'll drive."

 

Title: Nos Duo Turba Sumus
Fandom: Pinky and the Brain


Brain closed his eyes tightly and grabbed the sides of his head. "Pinky, right now, I'm feeling more than a little claustrophobic; this cage just isn't large enough for the two of us."

Pinky looked around, confused. "But Brain, this is our usual cage. There's loads of room."

"I need you to leave me alone!" Brain screamed.

Tears welling in his eyes, Pinky unlocked the cage and started to stagger out. He turned back and asked, "But Brain, does this mean we're not taking over the world tonight?"

Brain grunted, "Just take one on the substitute plans from the drawer!"

 

Title: Gemini
Fandom: James Bond


Bond ducked under one twin's wild punch and tried to land his own jab on the side of the man's knee, but the other twin's foot smashed his elbow before he could connect. Less than a second later, a second punch from the first twin caught him on the back of the head.

Dazed, Bond lunged forward, slamming into the first twin's legs. The last thing he felt before losing consciousness was the man landing atop him.

* * *

He awoke to find the twins standing over him, one with a heavily bandaged head. "At least now I can tell you apart."

 

Taurum Tollet Qui Vitulum Sustulerit

Yeah, that was alright.



Gemini

Wow, a simple title. I already feel better about it!

Great line, and a classic Daniel Craig' Bond one.

Not just with your use of the move, and result, but anytime I see it in literature; as a judoka who got his blue belt with a "lunging at legs" move (Morote Gari, if you're asking) I always have difficulty envisioning the person being attacked, landing on the attacker. Admittedly Bond was dazed, so he wasn't doing the move with the utmost finesse, but still. Even if you rugby tackle someone, you don't get squished by them.

An okay drabble, lifted by that last quip.



Amicus Est Unus Animus in Duobus Corporibus

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA. LOL.

 

Thanks. Sith, if it helps, the guy was likely already leaning forward.

Title: Quo Me Vertam Nescio
Fandom: The Legend of Zelda


Link had set a small bundle of sticks near the point where he'd entered this forest; he'd hoped he could identify the exact point where he'd get bounced back before it happened. But no, he couldn't see the sticks until he was right on top of them.

He tried turning, cutting left or right through the trees, only to find himself back in the same spot. Maybe there was a specific pattern he needed to follow, he thought, wondering if he had the patience to find it.

* * *

Ten minutes later, he emerged on the forest's far side. "Barely," he muttered.

 

Title: Qui Tempus Praestolatur, Tempus Ei Deest
Fandom: Babylon 5


"You must strike the moment an opportunity first presents itself!" G'Kar announced to his gathered acolytes. Most were Narn, but some humans and a handful of other races had joined the ranks. "For another chance may never come, and then where are you, hmm?"

As they fawned over this latest insight, he noticed the chronometer. "If you'll excuse me, I have a shuttle to catch." He rushed to the station, his followers close behind, and arrived just in time to see a shuttle leaving the station.

"What I said doesn't apply to shuttles," he said. "For these, you can wait."

 

Title: Manibus Pedibusque Id Fac!
Fandom: Superfriends


Grodd grabbed a third lever with one of his feet and pulled hard. Almost immediately, he developed a rhythm, using three limbs to pull, the fourth for maintaining his balance.

Across the control deck, he saw that the Riddler and Black Manta were each settling for two levers at a time. "Come on," Grodd shouted, "use your feet!" He changed his balancing limb to an arm and held a lever in each foot.

"Foolish ape!" yelled Riddler. "The rest of us don't have opposable toes! We couldn't do that if we wanted to!"

Grodd grunted dismissively. "Must I do everything?"

 

Title: Iucundi Acti Labores
Fandom: Burn Notice


It's said that there is nothing so satisfying as a job well done. For some spies, the true believers, it's the certain knowledge that they've made the world a better place. For the less naive, it's the relief at making it through another assignment in one piece.

* * *

"But that's just it, Mr. Weston!" the large man yelled, waving his stump. "Tell me where I can find my hand, and maybe I won't take yours instead."

Michael shrugged. "I chucked it out the car window less than a block away, Fyodor. It's only been twenty years. It may still be there."

 

Part of the fun of these is seeing which fandoms I know and enjoying the name dropping, and the rest of the fun comes from speculating the characterization of the new fandom's characters to me.

 

Thanks.

Title: Qui per Vitutem Peritat, Non Interit
Fandom: World of Warcraft


"Here," King Varian Wrynn announced to the gathered crowd, "is the new memorial to those who gave their lives to defend Stormwind against the Orcish invaders!" The curtain fell from the marble monolith inscribed with names. "Almost two thousand men and women are commemorated on this-"

A voice from the crowd interrupted, "But tens of thousands died defending this city!"

"Where are their names?" another added.

The king nodded sadly. "I regret that the names of most who fought were lost when Stormwind fell. Even then, there wasn't enough space to include every name, so we had to be... selective."

 

Title: Perge, Scelus, Mihi Diem Perficias.
Fandom: Archer


Lana fired a few shots over the barricade. "I thought Burt Reynolds was your idol."

"A guy can have more than one. And have you ever watched Dirty Harry?" Archer covered with some shots of his own.

"I have!" Cheryl interjected. "'Make my day, punk!'"

Archer grunted. "That's from Sudden Impact, the fourth film in the series! And you said it wrong!"

Pam raised her hand. "I know! 'Do you feel lucky?'"

"That's from the first one," confirmed Archer.

"My turn again," Cheryl said. "'It's not a tumor!'"

Archer turned to Lana. "Shoot her or shoot me, don't care which."

 

Title: Sunt Asini Multi Solum Bino Pede Fulti
Fandom: Flash Gordon


The elected ruling council of Mongo had decided to celebrate the twentieth anniversary of the final defeat of Ming the Merciless with a grand spectacle, a great showcase for the special talents of all the planet's various races. Well, almost all.

"Why are we to be excluded, when even the Shark Men are being allowed to take part?" yelled Prince Jack of the Donkey Men. "We have been staunch supporters of the council since its inception!"

"This isn't about who's loyal or not. It's just, well, some of us have seen the kinds of shows you Donkey Men put on."

 

Title: Optima Medicina Temperantia Est
Fandom: The Simpsons


"No, Homer," Dr. Hibbert said, "you can't just take your son's liver."

Homer protested, "But the whole reason we had him was to one day harvest his organs!" Marge hrmed for several seconds before reluctantly agreeing.

"The only way you're ever getting a spot on the transplant list by avoiding all alcohol consumption for at least a year," explained Dr. Hibbert. "Though quite frankly doing so would likely be enough to reverse the damage, eliminating the need for the transplant.

"Either way, if you want to live, you'll have to give up the booze."

Homer's scream echoed down the hall.

 

Title: Aequo Animo Esto
Fandom: Earthworm Jim


"I must remain calm," Peter chanted, concentrating on the flame before him. "I must remain centered. I must remain-"

A reverberating crash right outside the room threatened to break his concentration almost as much as when the door opened a second later.

"Petey," Jim said, "just ignore anything you hear. I don't want to interrupt your meditation time." He left, closing the door softly behind him.

The next minute was a cacophony of crashes, bangs, screams, moos, and other assorted noises, each driving Peter closer to distraction.

Then the door opened again. Jim asked, "Where do we keep the mop?"

 

Title: Fortis Esto Non Ferox
Fandom: Doctor Who
Doctor: Twelfth


The Doctor glared at the monitor; through the static, the ranks of young men and women proudly marching out to their certain deaths remained unmistakable. That hideous voice taunted him again. "See, Doctor? We have so many brave young troopers ready to defend their homes and families."

"This isn't bravery!" the Doctor shouted back. "It's naivety, maybe. Foolhardiness, most definitely! But there's nothing brave about mass suicide!" For several minutes, the voice didn't say another word, but the marching continued relentlessly.

Finally, it said simply, "Then save them."

"By defeating your enemy for you?" he asked. "Or by stopping you?"