Murder Mystery: The Basement

//walks down basement stairs

//turns on overhead lights

Now where is that washer and dryer? I need to get this dress washed and the rest of my laundry done before I go home.

//picks up dress

Oh...mama's gonna kill me for getting her dress all dirty. I just wore it one night and look at the mess I made!

There's the washer! What a beauty. Sure beats the tub outside the trailer back home.

//applies stain remover to dress

//puts dress in washer

I guess I'll just set here and wait for my stuff to get done. I know! I'll think about the plans for Blue and I when we leave here.

 

//walks down basement stairs and hears the sound of the washer

What the...? Shanaenae? Doing your laundry, I see. I guess they don't have dry cleaners in Dogpatch, do they?

//leans up against post

 

//turns around sharply

Ms. Undress! I didn't hear you come down the stairs, you scared me!

I'm just doing some things that...got a little dirty while I was here. I think I've told you before, I'm not from Dogpatch, I'm from Mississippi.

//glares

Are you trying to get me riled up, Ms. Undress? Cause if you are, you're not gonna like me when I'm upset, I can guarantee that.

 

//smiles

Oh, Shanaenae, dear, I wouldn't dream of trying to get you riled up. I'm quite sure you can look after yourself.

//moves toward supply shelves

//picks up stain remover

I just came down here to get a stain out of my dress. Silly me, I just dumped my Bloody Mary all over it. What kind of stains are you trying to remove? Maybe some grass stains from you and Blue's little romps in the garden?

//snickers

 

//hears the commotion on her way down to the tennis court

Ms. Solomon, is everything all right down there? I hope you're not breaking the washer and dryer. cb's maid still needs to wash my dress for me!

//blanches as she walks down the dusty steps into the dimly lit basement

I sure hope that monkey isn't hiding down here. . .

Ursula?

//notices the looks the two women are giving each other

What's going on here?

 

//moves quickly toward Ursula

You stay out of this Bakerfield!

Don't you say anything bad about me and Blue you witch! He loves me and we're gonna go away together!

//pushes Ursula's shoulder

I've seen the way you make your cat eyes at him and I ain't gonna let you go after my man! You just leave him alone or...or...

//puts hand on hips, ready for a fight

 

//Ursula's mouth cocks in a wry smile

Or what, Shanaenae? You'll fight me? You'll kill me? Sweetheart, with all that's gone on in this mansion in the last day, I think you'd want to be very careful who you threaten.

//moves a step closer to Shanaenae

//looks in her eyes

And you definitely don't want to threaten me, little girl. You have no idea who you're dealing with.

//steps back

Don't worry, sweetheart, I'm not after your man. I have one all my own. You and Blue go right ahead and play house...or doctor...or whatever it is you two do together. Just stay away from me and everything will be fine.

//turns and begins walking up the stairs

Thank you for your concern Ms. Bakerfield, but I do believe Ms. Solomon and I have reached an understanding.

Now if you don't mind, I'm going to change my clothes and find another drink. Perhaps I'll see you in the Kitchen Ms. Bakerfield. I could do with a light snack as well.

 

//gives Ursula a snotty look behind her back as the older woman reaches the top of the stairs

I think we figured out where the monkey is hidden. Right up her ass!

Don't pay her any attention. She's just jealous because you've got an exciting, sexy man and she's got. . .well. . .

//raises eyebrows

monkeyman.

 

//clenches her fists

You think you're so much BETTER than EVERYONE don't you?! Well, YOU'RE NOT! I may live in a trailer but I'm GOOD PEOPLE! And YOU'RE MEAN AND EVIL!

I HATE YOU!

//stands and glares at Ursula

You're the one who needs to stay away from me, Undress. Far away. You get me?

 

//turns around at the top of the stairs and looks down at Shanaenae and Nathalie

Ms. Solomon, you have no need to worry. I don't plan on spending time with you or your so-called Doctor Blue. Frankly, I don't care if you think I'm Atilla the Hun...just remember what I told you.

And Ms. Bakerfield, I was trying to be sociable, but if you insist on spending your precious time with this backwards, trailer park hick, be my guest.

//smiles

Have a lovely day.

//exits basement

 

I'll spend my time with anyone I feel like, Ms. Undress.


Out of the night that covers me, black as the pit from pole to pole. I thank whatever gods may be for my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance I have not winced nor cried aloud. Under the bludgeonings of chance my head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears, looms but the horror of the shade, and yet the menace of the years finds, and shall find me, unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate, how charged with punishments the scroll, I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul.

-William E. Henley


So, now you see how I feel.

 

//watches Ursula leave

//begins pacing

Oh! I hate that woman! She's up to no good, I can tell. She just thinks she's so much better than us what with her dating that fancy Professor.

I should just fix her. Take her out and be done with her...

//stops

//looks at Nathalie

//smiles

I'm sorry. I get a little carried away sometimes. Mama always said I had a right nasty temper.

//laughs

Oh...look at that, my dress is done!

//steps over to the washer

And all the stains are out!