"My Dear Padme"- Anakin's death

Look, I'm aware that it's been almost seven months since a new post to the story in here, but I spent good sleeping time on that last post, so somebody ought to read it...

 

Well I liked it if nothing else

 

That's always a plus.

 

Keisha, I missed you! This thread was dull without ya!

Yeah! A new post...Will Anakin turn to the light (insert hoping face) or will this only drive him further towards palpy?

EOJ

 

A post! It looked like Anakin was turning back to the light Please get him to come back

Great post though

 

YEAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A Post!!!!!!!'


NO!!!!!!!!! Not Sabé!!!!!

Great post, though!!!

 

Up!

Poor Sabe

EOJ

 

I would like to thank JMMJ for her help on that post.

 

The trip back to Amidala was a quiet one. Much of Sabé?s guard had remanded behind with the Jades to finish deciding the details of the alliance, so only Obi-Wan Kenobi and Aulos Rae were traveling back to Naboo, with the exception of the pilot and co-pilot. Kenobi spent most of the trip sitting at the small table Sabé had watched the company while pretending to play cards. The little girl seemed to sense his disquiet and avoided him. Over and over in his mind, Obi-Wan considered the statements the handmaiden had made about her. It was because of Rae that Sabé had been killed. It was because of Anakin that Padmé had been abandoned. It was because of him that both had occurred. And even this morbid circle of thoughts couldn?t keep the cold, inert shell that once was his dear friend from subtly permeating his mind. He tried to come up with a way to tell Sabé?s queen well, but he had no ideas.

Padmé was waiting on the landing platform when the small transport arrived. She was alone, and Obi-Wan watched as the wind whipped her cloak around her, playing with it as if it were merely a plaything. He shook his head. The wind is more kindly to you than life has been, he thought mournfully. Gruffly, he told Rae to go into the palace and occupy herself. Then, he left the transport.

?Did all go well,?? Padmé inquired as he approached her. She seemed calm and serene from her newfound motherhood, glowing with the secret pleasure of her children?s existence. The Jedi would have to take them away from her, as he?d inadvertently taken her husband and her best friend.

?Force, Padmé, it would be better if you?d never met me at all,? Obi-Wan said suddenly, breaking the silence he hadn?t been paying attention to. He?d been too lost in his thoughts about what he had to tell her, what more he had to take away from her. ?I hope someday you?ll be able to forgive me for that.?

The Queen looked at him questioningly, and he saw her cool confidence slip. ?What do you mean?? she asked, although it was more of a royal command than a true question. Kenobi shook his head, recognizing her attempt to conceal her emotions behind the guise of the Queen, who wasn?t allowed to have emotions. Just as Jedi aren?t supposed to have emotions.

?I met Anakin on Bothawui,? he said hesitantly. How do you tell someone her best friend is dead because of you? Obi-Wan decided just to explain it as it happened and deal with the results afterwards. ?He wanted to fight me, to kill me. I told Sabé to keep Aulos out of the way. Aulos got away from her and slipped between us. Sabé tried not to follow, but the rain made the grass slick and?? The Jedi shook his head, unable to continue.

?What are you saying?? she replied softly, suddenly paying attention to nothing except Obi-Wan?s narrative. She grabbed his shoulder, shaking and squeezing him nervously. It took a moment for the Jedi to realize she was trembling slightly although trying to control it to the best of her ability. ?Tell me what happened.?

?He struck her. Anakin killed Sabé, though in his grief he thought it was you. Sabé is dead, Padmé.? Abruptly, the Queen let go of his shoulder, turning slightly away.

?Oh, my dearest handmaiden,? she moaned softly, ?my friend.?

?I wish to give her a Jedi?s burial, if you will allow me. She deserves the honor because she acted as one. I hope you will give me permission to build her a funeral pyre.?

?I will have to think on it, but it will be a hard choice. She may deserve the honor, but I don?t know if I want her body to be treated as the Jedi.? Amidala turned to face Obi-Wan. ?The Jedi have taken my husband, my best friend. What more could you demand of me? I have nothing left except my children and what shambles remain of my life. What else could you take from me??

The dampness on her face from her tears tore at his heart, but Obi-Wan knew there was something else he had to ask of her. ?I need your children,? he said simply. ?I must take them too and hide them so that Anakin can never find them, o

 

Hurray!!! Another post!

 

yeah!!

Aw, it's so sad!!!!

 

It's very sad.

EOJ

 

Should I stop then?

 

Many, many thanks to JMMJ who helped me write it and was patient through my explanation of the character pathos... always interesting discussion. She wrote at least half and beta-ed what I wrote.

***

She was dead.

Anakin felt the knowledge within him like a sickness eating away at his internal organs, making him a shell from the inside out. He stormed into his habitation, the hated chamber that his master had made for him to rejuvenate. The door hissed shut behind him, repressurizing the enclosure with pure oxygen for his system. Anakin tore off his inhuman helmet, heaving it as hard as he could at the white wall. Despite his strength, the helmet simply bounced away, not dented due to either foresight or coincidence. He began tearing at his armor, peeling it off piece by piece in frustration, revealing only a soft undertunic and leggings underneath and removing his only method of support.

He collapsed to the floor, his misshapen, pale head buried in his hands. Hot tears poured from his eyes, streaming painfully down his still tender cheeks. His Padmé was dead, and it was his fault. Her face as she slid, wounded, was hovering before him, distorted by the pain and the night. Somehow he knew that face would haunt him in his dreams and his waking moments.

You gave up love for hate.

Obi-Wan Kenobi?s words stung him, and, although the fallen student was loathe to admit it, he knew Kenobi was right. But it was the own bastard?s fault! The Jedi had stolen and defiled his wife, his Padmé! The one woman Anakin had ever loved and ever complete trusted, his master, the man he was supposed to trust, had stolen her from him, coaxed her away from him.

By herself, in a way he couldn?t even begin to understand, she?d drawn from him a song, something he didn?t know even existed within him. The tune was one of love and bliss, happiness he?d never known before or since. But then the tune had changed. The only thing Anakin had really learned from his brief encounter of love was how to aim for someone who outdrew him. Padmé was too far above him, knowing too much and acting too much! She was passionate grace to his fumbling clumsiness, and soon the tune had faded from his lips, the runs too complicated for him to replicate as he should.

As the tune evolved from the original simplistic melody, Anakin had watched the notes slip from his grasp. It had seemed the tune she had sung to him she suddenly began to teach to Obi-Wan. He caught on to the melody quickly, rising beyond Anakin in a mere breath, until the love was gone, replaced by cold loneliness and even colder fury. Anger filled Anakin at the thought of betrayal. Love, in the end, had earned him nothing but pain and fond memories that hurt even worse than any situation he could conceive. Anger had replaced love, filling his days with unhappiness and fury.

But anger had also brought him respite from his love for Amidala. Whenever he had felt that hole in his heart where she had been, all he had to do was let his anger take over and the pain would be gone. His mind could divert from his Ami and back to himself.

But it never lasted long enough, somehow. Ami had kept coming back to him, all the time - her expression when she was giving orders, the smile when he made her laugh, the light in her eyes when she was happy, her beautiful hair, her comforting words. It was a paradox: he couldn't make himself forget, but he couldn't bring himself to remember.

Now she was gone forever - he couldn't ever hope to see that smile again. The one light he had left in the world had gone out... and the only thing left was anger.

Only one problem: he couldn't blame it all on Obi-Wan this time, as much as he tried. He had wielded the blade, he had been so blinded by the confusing mix of love and anger that he hadn't really seen what was right in front of him.

The faults you hate most about others are the ones you see in yourself.

*Damn you, Obi-Wan!* He couldn't get away from his Master's teachings, even after

 

Eep!!! I know it has to happen, but will the real Padme talk some sense into her hubby, now!!! There's still hope!!!

Loved it!!!

EOJ

 

That was so good!!!!!

Good but sad!!!!

up!

 

Up!

EOJ

 

boosting this up...

 

No one's online....

 

Just realized that this thread was ALIVE again!!!

I am hooked once more on this story. Keep it coming!

 

Just wanted to compliment you on the excellent job you did of stringing our disconnected scribblings together, Musical. I like the final product very much - excellent!

I especially enjoyed some of the additions you made that I didn't notice as much because I was writing myself - like the entire metaphor to a song. Very poetic - I think that's what I like best about your writing: it's very lyrical. Anakin's fury was beautifully expressed and I love the words you used to do it. You seem to find different ways of expressing ideas, which is awesome, because you challenge yourself.

Keep up the great work, and I hope I find you online again soon so we can work out more of this story!

JMMJ

 

Up!

EOJ

 

Thanks, JMMJ! I couldn't have done it without you though. Too bad we haven't seen each other online recently. I look forward to it!

E: I can't spell... *grins sheepishly*

 

Up!

EOJ

 

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