Before - Legends Myyyyyyy Prrrrrrrrecccccccciousssss [Obi-Tourtue/abuse/neglect tragedy] COMPLETED!!!

Hi, I may or may not get a post in next week, if I don't, then you don't get a post until July.

 

[face_shocked]

Since thou torments us by making thy faithful readers wait, this one shall torture thee by the confusing icons above this infernal post. Confusin' enough for ya?

 

Oooooookay....

Klea, darling, just how much sugar have you consumed lately???

Well, you made me laugh out loud, so it's all good. *Qui-Gon was dancing* I don't know why, but at that part, I had a metal image of Qui-Gon doing the HokiPoki, while SINGING it. I died. Or is that HockyPocky. Or HociPoci. Or HocyPocy, or HokyPoky, or HigiltyPigilty, or Neih! What ever.

Well, though, the banana peels....hm, Dad sumed it up when he read sum before me. "It's fine, but kinda silly." At least, he sumed it up though grossly understating it....


Can't wait for sum more!

-Nio

 

Yeah! More readers! I feel so special!

Not much sugar...But does peanut butter count???

Yes...I am still not sure where the banana peels came from...They just kind of...appeared. lol

Yes, quite confusing, not the actual icons, but the fact that it took the queen of confusing [lol my sis says she was hardly ever confused when she hardly ever saw me for a week of camp] about 5 minutes to figure out what icons you were speaking of, lol.

But, because I got feedback, you get a post before I leave for 2 months, so yes, enjoy!

**********************************************************************************
HERE BEGINS THE FIRST ENDING OF THIS CHARMING STORY>>>
As soon as Qui-Gon left, he painfully climbed out of bed. ?Katirna, I will be leaving for the Argi-corps sooner then I planned?
***
It took Qui-Gon a half hour to find Mace, it seemed that Mace was deliberately avoiding him. When he finally found Mace, he practically tackled him. ?Where have you been??? What do you want????
Mace rolled his eyes ?Stop acting like a parent, Obi-Wan has decided to leave for the Argi-Corps?
Qui-Gon was convinced if his jaw dropped any lower, he would have to roll it up and safety pin it in place. ?It was your idea wasn?t it? You?ve always been jealous that he was MY Padawan, so you have doomed him to destruction, you ZORK!!! You are kidnapping my Padawan, you-?
?QUI-GON WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO ME?!?
Qui-Gon was startled into silence but he continued to clench his fists and pace.
?I thought you knew that he was leaving, he said that you mentioned him returning to the Argi-Corps with the last shipment of Jedi, and he agreed to go? Mace frowned
?Yoda was NOT very happy?
Qui-Gon stared at him ?I NEVER SAID ANYTHING ABOUT HIM LEAVING!!! YOU?RE LYING!!! YOU ARE TRYING TO STEAL HIM!!! TRICKSY WINDU, DIRTY LITTLE s?THIEF!!!?
Mace smacked him on the back ?Breath in, breath out? he instructed. Qui-Gon finally complied. ?That game has warped your mind? Qui-Gon ignored him ?What ship was he leaving on??
?We?ll Have a Blast 2? Mace answered.
Qui-Gon swiftly turned and ran for the stairs.
20 minutes later...
Cursing the Courscant traffic and weather under his breath, Qui-Gon jumped off the roof of the last speeder and ran over to the traffic control center [as he was out of credits he had resorted to hitch-hiking on speeder roofs, unfortunately it was raining]
He ran over to a traffic control Bith ?What landing platform is We?ll Have a Blast 2 on??
?Its just departing on platform Q-13? the Bith said as he pointed straight up. Sith! He would need a speeder to get there, and it was to late anyway, he watched in horror as it lifted off. Obi-Wan was on board, he could sense it. He had heard that the Argi-Corps were only going to accept one final load of Jedi from Courscant, then [due to a large amount of theft] they would be closing off the planet to all incoming traffic until a further announced date; at least a year. Mace had cheated him again. Ah well, there were other Padawans...
20 years later...
Qui-Gon nervously stepped off the ship. He hadn?t been to this planet in 21 years...
He entered the large info building.
?May I help you?? a receptionist asked
?Yes, I?m looking for a Jedi that was sent here 20 years ago to farm?
?Do you know his name?? she asked as she began opening some files.
?Obi-Wan Kenobi?
?Ah? she closed the files
?He is in currently working in the orchards in Manher? She gave him a map ?Just ask for Obi-Wan, everybody knows him around here? Qui-Gon nodded his thanks and left.

 

I'm glad for the post, don't get me wrong, but did you have to leave it there? You're leaving for two months? Does that mean we have to wait that long to read more? No fair!!!
OK, so that was a great post, and I can't help but wonder what Obi's been doing this whole time. 20 years since he left? That's a lot of time to wonder what happened. Hope to see more soon, but if not, I guess I'll understand. *sniffles*
--later--

 

KLEA!!!!!! YOUR GOING TO LEAVE THESE POOR PEOPLE IN SUSPENCE FOR TWO MONTHS??!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!

That is cruel, and unfortunently not unusal torture!! you should be ashamed of your own terrible self!! ~points to corner~ corner!! now!!!

Ya'll (ok, so theres only one faithful reader.. good enough) have my permission (and since I'm her elder sister I can do this) to bomb her with tomatos, oranges, bananas (purple!) ect, ect, until she posts another piece of the poor little story.

Yes, yes, I know, I'm a very kind, loving, blah blah blah older sister. oops! (wrong face)

 

come on lestie
you've got more written how hard could it be to type it up.

you're being so mean.

if you're not careful i'll have alex ban you from the twig forever or for a week i can never tell the two apart.
Tehehe.

also you are not leaving at least until
after efy.
else you would be shot.

the end of randomness for now.

good day Master, lestie, see you at YC

good day to Darth_Leia also even though i don't know you.

 

YOUR LEAVING FOR TWO MONTHS!!!!!!! I'll personally strangle you if you leave us without another post. I'll find you, don't worry.
*pauses*
WAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
*reverts to sanity*
Please write soon!

 

[face_shocked]
Awsum.


I love twists, like killing a main character, or killing a main character, or killing a main character or something. Whowouldathunkit??

I can see obi's reaction.

"AGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!AGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!AGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!AGH!!! AGH!!!AGH!!!AGH!!!"
And then his supermodel wife comes out and starts laughing, while Qui continues to attempt to bring air to obi's circulation.....

Oh yeah, it's all coming together.


T-t-t-two months??? *stands in a stupor long enough to gather moss* Oh. Okay. *sigh* If it must be....then....I must cry. [face_cry}

-Nio

 

Just wanted to say that I let my nine year old video game addicted son read the first two posts of this, and he hasn't stopped laughing for about ten minutes. Now he's working on the rest of it, and will be wanting more, but there is no more yet. His favorite parts? The banana peels, and when Qui-Gon shouts DIE DIE DIE! Ok, he's as disturbed as his mother, but that's bad genetics!

Just wanted to let you know that this story is good, and should be finished!! Please????

--later--

 

LOL I never expected such feedback! So, [I am back at the house for a couple hours before we leave for our family month-long-vacation] I emailed the story to myself from Word, and I will find a puter and get you a post sometime next week, I promise!

 

YEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!
*dances around the room*
TKJ

 

I'm looking forward to that!
So is my son!

 

Alrighty, at long last, here is the 2nd half of ending #1. If you aren't to scared off by this one, please stick around and read the next one. That one has a happy ending. Again, thanks for all the feedback!

**********************************************


?Ah, you look thirsty, have a drink my pretty one? the brown hermit bent carefully over the plant to give it a drink. He was odd looking, he wore faded brown robes patched with some kind of plant, sewn in place by some kind of vine. Colorful patches of flowers seemed to be actually planted in his pockets. His long hair was tied back with pink grass and he was barefoot, with thick calloused hands and feet. The only thing vaguely human about him was his eyes, they were a beautiful shade of green, shining with a strange gold light.
He carefully moved on to the next plant, examining and talking to it like an old friend.
?And how have you been my lovely one? We hopes you had a good sleep. No? Are there rocks bothering your roots again??? Here, let me help? The hermit placed his hand on the ground next to the plant, reaching down with the force and nudging a rock over an inch. ?All better? Are you thirsty? No? Well I am? The hermit took a long draught of water. He moved on the to next plants, continuing to talk to them and help them get comfortable.
Qui-Gon stared at the hermit in front of him, is this what he had been reduced to? His mind was reeling in shock. The hermit moved on to him next ?Oh look friends? he addressed the other plants ?We have a new friend, maybe he?s just a visitor, no, he isn?t moving, he looks thirsty. All brown and wrinkled, wouldn?t you like a drink my lovely? He doesn?t speak, what a strange, creature, ah well, perhaps he?s to parched to speak? With that, the hermit dumped several gallons of water on Qui-Gon.
Qui-Gon was still in shock. He gently placed his hand on the hermits arm and looked into his eyes ?Obi-Wan? Do you remember me?? The green eyes met his in confusion. ?Its me, Qui-Gon? Obi-Wan gave him a puzzled look. ?Look my friends, he speaks! But such a strange creature, Obi-Wan? I think I?ve heard that before, but Qui-Gon? What a strange name for a plant. Ah well, it was nice meeting you, we always welcome new friends. Farewell my lovelies?
With that Obi-Wan ambled on to the next row of trees.
Qui-Gon stared after him and shook his head, it all started with one dumb toy. First he was obsessed, Obi-Wan had been mentally abused to the point of insanity now Mace and Yoda had been playing SpAcEbOy for 3 years straight, 17 other Jedi had been expelled from the Jedi order for the same reason and locked in a special padded meditation room. [the only reason Yoda and Mace escaped this is they are far to powerful to kick out of the Jedi Order. So, they were just locked away in a room on off the Jedi Council room and declared to sick for visitors; which was probably true]
His next Padawan after Obi-Wan [Anakin] was also locked away in the secret room for the mentally obsessed Jedi. [A little known of room that was kept VERY quiet]
Well, at least Obi-Wan seemed happy. Maybe he would take up farming to, it sounded soothing...He could help Obi-Wan with the plants, and they would be forever united. Yes, that sounded good.

THE END Of ending #1

 

Alrighty, at long last, here is the 2nd half of ending #1. If you aren't to scared off by this one, please stick around and read the next one. That one has a happy ending. Again, thanks for all the feedback!

**********************************************


?Ah, you look thirsty, have a drink my pretty one? the brown hermit bent carefully over the plant to give it a drink. He was odd looking, he wore faded brown robes patched with some kind of plant, sewn in place by some kind of vine. Colorful patches of flowers seemed to be actually planted in his pockets. His long hair was tied back with pink grass and he was barefoot, with thick calloused hands and feet. The only thing vaguely human about him was his eyes, they were a beautiful shade of green, shining with a strange gold light.
He carefully moved on to the next plant, examining and talking to it like an old friend.
?And how have you been my lovely one? We hopes you had a good sleep. No? Are there rocks bothering your roots again??? Here, let me help? The hermit placed his hand on the ground next to the plant, reaching down with the force and nudging a rock over an inch. ?All better? Are you thirsty? No? Well I am? The hermit took a long draught of water. He moved on the to next plants, continuing to talk to them and help them get comfortable.
Qui-Gon stared at the hermit in front of him, is this what he had been reduced to? His mind was reeling in shock. The hermit moved on to him next ?Oh look friends? he addressed the other plants ?We have a new friend, maybe he?s just a visitor, no, he isn?t moving, he looks thirsty. All brown and wrinkled, wouldn?t you like a drink my lovely? He doesn?t speak, what a strange, creature, ah well, perhaps he?s to parched to speak? With that, the hermit dumped several gallons of water on Qui-Gon.
Qui-Gon was still in shock. He gently placed his hand on the hermits arm and looked into his eyes ?Obi-Wan? Do you remember me?? The green eyes met his in confusion. ?Its me, Qui-Gon? Obi-Wan gave him a puzzled look. ?Look my friends, he speaks! But such a strange creature, Obi-Wan? I think I?ve heard that before, but Qui-Gon? What a strange name for a plant. Ah well, it was nice meeting you, we always welcome new friends. Farewell my lovelies?
With that Obi-Wan ambled on to the next row of trees.
Qui-Gon stared after him and shook his head, it all started with one dumb toy. First he was obsessed, Obi-Wan had been mentally abused to the point of insanity now Mace and Yoda had been playing SpAcEbOy for 3 years straight, 17 other Jedi had been expelled from the Jedi order for the same reason and locked in a special padded meditation room. [the only reason Yoda and Mace escaped this is they are far to powerful to kick out of the Jedi Order. So, they were just locked away in a room on off the Jedi Council room and declared to sick for visitors; which was probably true]
His next Padawan after Obi-Wan [Anakin] was also locked away in the secret room for the mentally obsessed Jedi. [A little known of room that was kept VERY quiet]
Well, at least Obi-Wan seemed happy. Maybe he would take up farming to, it sounded soothing...He could help Obi-Wan with the plants, and they would be forever united. Yes, that sounded good.

THE END Of ending #1

 

Alrighty, at long last, here is the 2nd half of ending #1. If you aren't to scared off by this one, please stick around and read the next one. That one has a happy ending. Again, thanks for all the feedback!

**********************************************


?Ah, you look thirsty, have a drink my pretty one? the brown hermit bent carefully over the plant to give it a drink. He was odd looking, he wore faded brown robes patched with some kind of plant, sewn in place by some kind of vine. Colorful patches of flowers seemed to be actually planted in his pockets. His long hair was tied back with pink grass and he was barefoot, with thick calloused hands and feet. The only thing vaguely human about him was his eyes, they were a beautiful shade of green, shining with a strange gold light.
He carefully moved on to the next plant, examining and talking to it like an old friend.
?And how have you been my lovely one? We hopes you had a good sleep. No? Are there rocks bothering your roots again??? Here, let me help? The hermit placed his hand on the ground next to the plant, reaching down with the force and nudging a rock over an inch. ?All better? Are you thirsty? No? Well I am? The hermit took a long draught of water. He moved on the to next plants, continuing to talk to them and help them get comfortable.
Qui-Gon stared at the hermit in front of him, is this what he had been reduced to? His mind was reeling in shock. The hermit moved on to him next ?Oh look friends? he addressed the other plants ?We have a new friend, maybe he?s just a visitor, no, he isn?t moving, he looks thirsty. All brown and wrinkled, wouldn?t you like a drink my lovely? He doesn?t speak, what a strange, creature, ah well, perhaps he?s to parched to speak? With that, the hermit dumped several gallons of water on Qui-Gon.
Qui-Gon was still in shock. He gently placed his hand on the hermits arm and looked into his eyes ?Obi-Wan? Do you remember me?? The green eyes met his in confusion. ?Its me, Qui-Gon? Obi-Wan gave him a puzzled look. ?Look my friends, he speaks! But such a strange creature, Obi-Wan? I think I?ve heard that before, but Qui-Gon? What a strange name for a plant. Ah well, it was nice meeting you, we always welcome new friends. Farewell my lovelies?
With that Obi-Wan ambled on to the next row of trees.
Qui-Gon stared after him and shook his head, it all started with one dumb toy. First he was obsessed, Obi-Wan had been mentally abused to the point of insanity now Mace and Yoda had been playing SpAcEbOy for 3 years straight, 17 other Jedi had been expelled from the Jedi order for the same reason and locked in a special padded meditation room. [the only reason Yoda and Mace escaped this is they are far to powerful to kick out of the Jedi Order. So, they were just locked away in a room on off the Jedi Council room and declared to sick for visitors; which was probably true]
His next Padawan after Obi-Wan [Anakin] was also locked away in the secret room for the mentally obsessed Jedi. [A little known of room that was kept VERY quiet]
Well, at least Obi-Wan seemed happy. Maybe he would take up farming to, it sounded soothing...He could help Obi-Wan with the plants, and they would be forever united. Yes, that sounded good.

THE END Of ending #1

 

Well, that was odd, but I liked it. Mace and yoda playing for three years straight? Anakin locked in the crazy room? That was great! And so likely. In fact, can I lock all four of those game crazies in my house up? I'll give them a big room, a tv for each system, and I'll even throw some food at them every so often!

Looking forward to the next ending!

--later--

 

For curiosity's sake Why is it posted three times?
Hello everyone.
um...
Goodbye everyone.

 

Arraagggg! The stupid puter posted it 3 times! But at least it posted, dial-up does not like theforce.net and it took forever for it to accept the post.
LOL! They would probably think that they were in 7th heaven. Thanks for sticking around, I'll post the 2nd ending when I return home in August.

 

yeah
dumb internet really dosen't like this site
mine usualy disconnects me every few minutes
i find it very useful to get on at some unearthly hour of the night when not many other people are on
it useualy works better

 

~GASP~ ~FAINT~ ~runs around screaming~ Klea posted!! It POSTED!!! Party!!!! ~jumps up and down screaming in an extreamly immature fashion~

And yes, I spelled things ~gasp~ incorrectly!!



~composes self~ Well, that was fun. ~straightens tunic, ect. in a half hearted attempt to look extreamly proper and Jedish~

~leaves in an exceedingly calm fashion~

 

**blinks**

master is you alright?

 

Just finished reading and e-mailing this to a friend (A gameboy addicted friend. A gameboy, don't touch that or I hurt you very badly addicted friend.

that was great...

 

Yeah! Another reader! Welcome! Glad you enjoyed it! Well I just got home this AM, so expect a post either later today or Monday!

 

Alrighty then, here goes!

**********************************************


HERE BEGINS THE 2ND ENDING OF THIS CHARMING STORY>>>
Qui-Gon glowered at Mace ?Are you telling me that you made me leave my Padawan, skip supper, miss my turn in the showers [I wish you WOULD let me leave that dorky padded room and return to my old apartments.] Miss my favorite show, and give up my resses peanut butter cup [which was my DESSERT] JUST TO DRINK HOT CHOCOLATE AND BLUE MILK AND TALK FOR OLD TIMES SAKE?!?!?!?!?!??
Mace put the cap back on the milk. ?Not exactly, but pretty close, I have your Resses if you want it.?
Qui-Gon glowered at him ?I am not in a talkative mood?
?Just drink your milk? Mace said. Qui-Gon stonily picked it up and swallowed the quart-glass in one gulp. ?What do you want????
Mace sighed, ?Well, I am a certified psychiatrist and I would like to help. I think you?re a little confused? Qui-Gon squeezed the cup in his hand so hard that it shattered. ?I DON?T NEED THREAPY!!! I AM PERFECTLY HAPPY!!!? he shouted.
Mace glanced at a data pad ?Alright? he said in a soothing voice ?Lets talk about your Mother? Qui-Gon stomped his foot and growled. ?You would prefer not to? Alright, lets talk about your childhood?

1½ hour later...
?For the last time? Qui-Gon said in a slow controlled voice ?I did NOT have a rough or unusual childhood. It was PERFECTLY NORMAL!!! At least as far as any Jedi?s childhood can be.?
?Ah!!! Now we are getting somewhere!!!? Mace proclaimed
?Now, the REALL question and the real reason you are having this soothing session? Qui-Gon carefully controlled his temper ?Ah yes, it has been, most soothing...?
?Good? Mace nodded approvingly ?Because I was at the very bottom of my class and I am barley legal. Anyway, Yoda has sent me to ask you why you are sending your Padawan to the Argi-Corps?? Qui-Gon sat bolt upright in his chair ?WHAT?!?!!?!?!??
Mace went on speaking in a smooth unruffled tone as if he hadn?t heard him. ?As this is also a inquisition, you are hereby under arrest, you have the right to remain silent, anything you say can be used aga-? Qui-Gon leaped to his feet ?WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?!?!? I am not sending Obi-Wan anywhere, I never even CONSIDERED sending him back, I do NOT want to talk about my childhood, I DO NOT HAVE A MENTAL PROBLEM, AND I DO NOT NEED THERAPY!?
Mace sat there staring at him ?You don?t want to send him back??
?No? Qui-Gon answered, slowly sitting down.
?Um, well, ah,? Qui-Gon was suddenly suspicious ?What??
?I hate to tell you this, but Obi-Wan just LEFT for the Argi-Corps.? Qui-Gon shot out of his chair ?WHAT?!?!?!?!?! And you ALLOWED IT?? He grabbed Mace ?Now listen buddy, I?m out of patience, what ship did he take?? Mace gulped ?We?ll Have a Blast 2? Qui-Gon dropped his grasp then whirled back around ?Keys?? Mace reached a trembling hand into his robe and handed him the ring of key beepers. [they?re like electronic keys]
?Rule #1? Qui-Gon muttered, ?Never mess with a insane Jedi separated from his apprentice.?

2 Days later...
Qui-Gon stepped off the ship clutching his stomach. I really need to send in a complaint about those ships... He muttered.
?Halt!? Qui-Gon stopped short in confusion. Two guards marched over and began locking some cuffs on him ?Hey!? Qui-Gon started yanking away ?What do you think your doing?? a guard behind him shocked him with an electro-jabber ?We have orders to restrain all Jedi who come here and put them instantly to work?
?But I?m not-?
?We have particular orders to restrain a older, human, male Jedi, sent here for causing unrest and trouble in the Jedi Order?
Qui-Gon was seething ?Who sent this order??
?Jedi Council member Mace Windu?