Need help with battles

i'm currently wriring and revising my fan fict, but space battles completely allude me. as do lightsaber battles, i find it very hard to write what i see.

could i have some help here? dialogue and themes are fine, it's just battles that i can't handle.

 

I remember this thread from a while back, the name of the thread stuck in my head. It should help

 

If you want a beta or even someone to walk you through the writing, I'm very willing to do that.

 

jaya is my beta reader, but i sent her the fict and haven't heard from her since.

but it's just there's glaring holes in my story where the battles should be, i just sorta skimmed over it.

 

Well, pm me the story and your ideas for battles and I'll make some suggestions.

 

that depends if you are into spoilers or not

 

There are two ways to come at any battle. The first is to step back and describe the actual movements of the combatants; this third-person technique, of course, requires intense visualization.

You need to step into the shoes of Nick Gillard and choreograph the sections of the fight you want to describe. Don't be too anal about it--that is to say, avoid listing every move except on very rare occasials. One time you might want to do a list is to show the speed of the battle: "The lightsaber flashed; slashed at his right shoulder, left flank, neck, arm, head--all in the space of a heartbeat."

Also, under "show," I would include little asides... focus on a small thing, or an ambiant thing, the play of light and shadow, the texture of the mud underfoot, the appearance of the mist churning in the wake of the fighters, are just a few things you can turn to. Such asides can add a poetic, sometimes, even a metaphorical aspect to the battle.

Another way, besides showing, is telling: getting a first-person perspective, moving out of the role of the observer, and getting into one (or both) of your character's(') head(s). What might your characters be thinking? Random thoughts ("Oh, I hope I didn't leave the shower in the 'fresher running!")? Are they in a contemplative mode with the Force removing their conscious might from the action ("He let the Force guide his hands, his feet, his entirety--he was only dimly and distantly aware of the hiss and clash of the two sabers.")? Is he reflecting on how this battle came to be--what led to it, and how it could have been avoided? You can also easily fit the previous technique of asides into this nerrative mode, with one of the fighters focusing in on a small thing.

The most important thing--with space battles as well as with saber fights--is to not be repetative. Use as many tricks as you can to make a prolonged battle exciting--describe the action, go into asides, and enter your character's minds at will to give your readers some variety.

For inspiration, watch dogfight footage, watch duels. Watch the lightsaber fights in the SW movies; the epic, multi-player mele war in Kill Bill; the duel between Westley and Inego in The Princess Bride; any movie that you know has a well-done fight, watch (also, check out some of the choreography demos in FF.N's fan film theater, maybe even go to the Fan Film boards and ask them some questions about planning out a fight). As an exersize, as you're watching these duels, try your best to describe them, put the movements into words. And remember, the thesaurus is your friend--part of avoiding repitition, I need hardly say, is to avoid repetative descriptions.

One last thing. Write like an editor. The length and quality of your sentences and paragraphs determine the pacing of your story. Long, introspective and descriptive sentences and paragraphs will slow the pace--short, clipped, and concise sentences and paragraphs will quicken the pace. Manipulate your imaginings with words like an editor manipulates raw footage with his tricks. For example, slow motion to accent the fluid grace of the human body; fast motion to accent the dramatic immediate danger of fighting with and against a blazing weapon that can sever a limb as easily as a hot knife through butter.

Hope this tirade helped.

 

thanks for that, i'll go through it in my story when i have the chance

 

Just my two cents:

Avoid uber ****ing anything. The same goes for deus ex machina, unless absolutely necessary.

A few sudden twists during the battle can also make it more fun and exciting.