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Saga Negotiations short A/P AU (finished)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by aninonymous, Mar 28, 2003.

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  1. aninonymous

    aninonymous Jedi Youngling star 3

    Aug 27, 2000

    This is an AU set at the end of the fireplace scene.


    "We'd be living a lie Anakin,

    I couldn't do that, could you?"

    The seconds stretched into centuries as the silence settled between
    the two. Neither one of them seemed to know what the next step
    should be.

    Anakin was trying hard to fight down the growing feelings of
    disappointment and frustration.
    His Master was forever chastizing him not to focuse on the negative
    so much, but if there was anything positive about this situation, Anakin
    certainly couldn´t find it.

    He didn´t understand how Padmé could be so composed, so certain of
    what was the right thing to do?
    He wasn?t sure of anything, anymore.
    His mind felt like a sandstorm on Tatooine. All confusion and chaos. There was no solid structure, no horizon to look for. No direction seemed the right one to take.
    He was lost!
    Every fibre of his being was telling him that his feelings were right, yet every letter in the rulebook was proofing him wrong.

    ?We could keep it a secret!?

    It had been his one childish hope to simply shut out the world around them.
    Create their own little universe and banish all rules from it.
    But as usual reality was a far cry from what Anakin Skywalker thought it should be.
    And Padmé had seen it right away.
    Her sharp mind had struck, and had bust the little romantic bubble he had so much wanted them to life in.
    There was no way they could hide what was between them, without destroying it.

    But what else was there?
    How could he argue with her sense of duty, or his own?
    Could he truly sacrifice his dream of becoming a Jedi, the reason he had left his mother, for his desire to be with Padmé?

    More questions he had no answer for.

    Unable to face her, Anakin turned his gaze out the window.

    Seeing the defeated look on Anakin´s face made her heart ache for the proud young man.
    He had opened up to her so completely, laid all his feelings bare and she had responded with reason and logic.
    A part of her wanted to take it all back., to simply give in to him and put the sparkle back into his eyes.
    But she couldn?t now, could she. She had effectively brought him back to the real world and that is where he needed to stay.
    They both had their responsibilities.
    However appealing it might be right now to simply follow her hearts desire, there was just no room for falling in love in the lives of a senator and a padawan. And the longer they held on to any illusions the greater the pain would be in the end. It simply couldn?t work.
    And if Anakin didn?t want to accept the cold reality of the world they lived in, than she had to be the voice of reason.
    With as much conviction and strength as she could muster, the young Senator set out to end this discussion.

    ?We should concentrate on our duties and just forget about everything else. We will be parting again in a few weeks and likely never see each other again anyway.?

    Padmé had intended this to be her closing argument, a final statement to end the matter and move on.

    It was however exactly that air of finality, that frightened Anakin out of his gloom.

    ??likely never see each other again.?
    The words had hit him like a physical blow.
    He couldn?t believe that she would dismiss everything they had so completely.

    Since the day he had met Padmé in Watto´s junkshop ten years ago, and in some way, Anakin wasn?t quite sure how to explain, even before that first encounter, she had been with him.
    He had kept the memory of her, that unique feeling of excitement and peacefulness, deep within him, in that place inside his heart where he hid all those emotions that the Jedi would frown upon.
    And whenever life had left him feeling cold and alone, he had gone there and wrapped himself in her presence, dreaming of a time when he could truly be near her again.

    And now that it was real, that he was here next to his Angel, he was just supposed to let her go.

    No, he couldn?t give
  2. diamond_pony2002

    diamond_pony2002 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Nov 6, 2002
  3. Darth_Pixel

    Darth_Pixel Jedi Youngling star 2

    Jan 17, 2003
    *Raises hand* I want more! lol
  4. aninonymous

    aninonymous Jedi Youngling star 3

    Aug 27, 2000
    Thanks for the replies! :D

    Here is the rest of it!

    ?I won?t?

    Her voice was so faint, Anakin wasn?t sure he hadn?t just imagined hearing it.
    It had happened before. When he had gotten so caught up in his dreams about her, that for a moment he had actually thought he could feel her presence and hear her voice.
    So he remained still, waiting for the illusion to be shattered, as it always was.

    Nothing happened!

    Padmé hadn?t moved or said anything more. Her forehead was still resting against his and Anakin could feel her breath against his skin.
    Soft and even.
    Finally, unable to wait any longer, he opened his eyes to reality and looked at her.
    She seemed different. Calm.

    The tension that had been so evident on her face a few minutes ago had completely disappeared and her eyes had regained their usual confidence. But there was something more. She radiated a sort of peace, that he?d seen glimpses of only once before, when they had been staying with her family.


    Padmé carefully watched his reaction.
    Anakin´s face was alive with emotion and he certainly showed no sign of the renowned Jedi serenity right now. To her it appeared as if he wasn?t sure whether to be amazed, overwhelmed or simply confused.
    Well, she couldn?t blame him, really.
    Her promise had taken her by surprise as well. It had spilled past her lips before better judgment could intervene. But now that it was said she felt no regret , and she knew that it was true.
    Leaving him was no longer an option. Maybe it had never truly been one. Maybe that future had been written the moment a dusty little boy had told her he would marry her someday .
    It had been a foolish thing to belief that denying her feelings would erase Anakin´s existence from her life.
    For even if he were to leave now, there was no doubt in her mind she would still think and worry about him. And no resolution, however reasonable and pragmatic, to end this, to simply not acknowledge the emotions, would make them disappear.
    The moment she had heard herself admit it out loud, an incredible feeling of freedom and contentment had washed all the inner turmoil away.

    And looking at it now, from the other side, she couldn?t really grasp why she had been so afraid to let go.
    The world certainly hadn?t dropped into chaos, just because Senator Amidala had acted on her emotions. No.
    Naboo was still on its steady course around the sun. The stars were still shinning and she would most likely be safe in the assumption that the Republic hadn?t suddenly disintegrated.
    There would be consequences, Padmé had no illusions about that. Life was certainly not going to be easy. But then it never was.
    At least this time, she wouldn?t have to deal with it alone. This time she had Anakin.

    Padmé reached out and ran her fingers along his jaw before taking his face between her small hands.
    He still hadn?t said anything and she could tell by the way he looked at her, that he was waiting for this moment to end. Anakin was preparing himself for the inevitable wake up call.

    ?I love you.?

    The words felt comfortable in her mouth, despite the fact, that she so rarely used them.
    Of course she had said them to her family, but that wasn´t really the same.


    Anakin´s mind worked hard, trying to make the transition between ten years of wishful thinking and actually hearing Padmé confess her love for him.

    ?You love me? But I thought you said you couldn?t afford to fall in love.?

    His voice was unsteady and Anakin cringed inwardly at how childish he sounded.
    And what was he saying anyway?
    Hadn?t he just spent half the evening arguing with her, trying to convince her to give in to her emotions, to listen to her heart and ignore the consequences?
    And now that she had done just that, he should be ecstatic, not demanding an explanation. Maybe Master Obi Wan was right, when h
  5. Wook

    Wook Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 23, 2002
    Wow! [face_shocked]

    I was thinking how proud ObiWan would be of me right now!

    I almost fell off my chair laughing at that one!

    I definitely like your writing style. Any more? Please? :)
  6. tun_dot_com

    tun_dot_com Jedi Youngling star 2

    Dec 5, 2002 of the BEST I've ever read. I know it's The End, but could you possibly write more? You obviously have a great gift in writing. :D
  7. aninonymous

    aninonymous Jedi Youngling star 3

    Aug 27, 2000
    Thanks for the nice replies! :)I´m all flattered now! [face_blush]
    I really do appreciate it and I´m glad you enjoyed it!

    I don´t think I can add anything to this story, but I have a few other ideas. :D

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