Beyond - Legends Never Sneak up on a Hutt !!! (First Sentence Challenge)

First Sentence Challenge (3/11/08)
Use the following sentence to start your fic:
?Maybe it wasn?t such a good idea pairing those two up.?

The "First Sentence" thread is right HERE. (FanFiction Resource)

_______________________________________



NEVER SNEAK UP ON A HUTT


?Maybe it wasn?t such a good idea pairing those two up.?

I looked up from the summary report to see something close to amusement in Corran?s face. Although, there might have been a bit of embarrassment residing there as well. In truth, I hadn?t even been reading the report. I was just stalling, and trying to gather my thoughts. Those two?

?Well, they both earned their positions.? I tried to sound innocuous, but I was never much of an actor.

?A couple more missions like this last one and they will have earned a one-way ticket to kitchen detail in the Temple without the possibility of parole.? Corran turned with the words and pretended to be interested in the holo-image hanging above the Kashyyyk secretary. I knew he was hiding the smile that neither one of us seemed to be able to shake since hearing of the exploits on Vodran.

?I always knew Hutts were dangerous, but?? I couldn?t finish as a *guffaw* spiked through, and Master Horn bent over trying to control himself. ?Though, I would have to give them credit for innovation. I mean, I have never?? I lost it again, and Corran wasn?t helping. He was doubled over shaking in laughter. What a sorry pair of Jedi Masters we are.

Pairing my Ben with his Valin seemed like a good idea. I mean, they liked each other, and always seemed to work well together in whatever exercises we threw at them by way of training. Maybe that was it. Maybe?they worked too well together. Perhaps they were so in tune with each other that there was never an opposing view point; no checks and balances. Either way, that?s no excuse for what happened.

?A rather explosive situation, in their defense.? Corran could barely get the words out before he broke down into another fit of laughter. ??they had to watch where they stepped.?

You can?t call on the Force to carry a straight face when all that is in you wants to further a carnival of laughter. I am a testament to that. Gods help me, I laughed with him and cursed him at the same time. One thing I did notice, though; any embarrassment Corran had held previously was surely gone with that last round of mirth.

?Luke??

?Yes, Master Horn?? I sobered up because he had as well.

?Read it again.? The huge grin was back, and I?m ashamed to say I matched it.

?One last time.? I warned nowhere near seriously.

He just waved it off. There was no doubt that the report would make its rounds, and we would both have the opportunity to read it in perpetuity.

I cleared my throat?and proceeded.


__________________________________


ABY 45; Team Leader Report: Jedi Knight Valin Horn; Team Member: Ben Skywalker; Si'Klaata Cluster, Planet Vodran; Mission: Ac'fren Spur hyperlane access protocol

Mission Detail: Assigned team will negotiate access protocols to the Ac?fren Spur Trade Lanes with Zoggnoga the Hutt inclusive of fare rates; communications; weight limits and tributes/gratuities. Zoggnoga the Hutt has a history of violence and should be handled appropriately, but with respect.



We arrived in Vodran orbit via Stealth X within parameters of the mission three standard days post assignment and were greeted by a full squadron of Z-95 Headhunters (modified-see appendix B) upon announcing our presence. Jedi Knight Skywalker suggested that we take an apathetic approach, and offer no agression. I concurred, and we cooperated by using the landing coordinates provided. Had we known that said coordinates would land us in the middle of a swamp, we

 

That was great! Valin and Ben apparently have a way with Hutts. And Luke and Corran laughing about their kids was great!

Good job! Definitely an interesting response.

 

wonderful job Trepidation!!!!

 

Note to Self: Never ignite a lightsabre when in close proximity of the south end of a Hutt.

*snort*

I think I just about lost it right there.

Very unique -- and I think we learned a very valuable lesson about sneaking up on Hutts.

 

Thanks...You know, it's hard to find any reference in a Star Wars book where a Jedi truly laughs. That seems odd...they must all be CPA's.

Thanks much!!!

It's a dangerous galaxy...especially for the lactose intolerant. Thanks for reading and the comments.


Cheers,
Trep

 

That was...well, absolutely...


Bravo!

 

How incredibly amusing and creative!

 

OMG I don't think I've ever laughed so hard in my my life, this was so funny.

Reading the first part I became anxious to see what would send both Corran and Luke into fits of laughter. So then I read the report and I have to agree with you there about it being a dangerous galaxy.

I can just picture that flaming monkey lizard shooting across the room and onto the Gammorean's lap. What an image!

Though I should have felt sorry for Valin and Ben, I couldn't, especially hearing about the gift they brought. I'm sure it would have been perfectly innocent had the initial incident not occurred, but it did, making it all the more comical.

Luke made a wise decision adding this to the padawan curriculum. It would only have been funny the first time anyway.

And fyi: I totally agree. Flaming Monkey Lizard is a great name for a slam band. I hope you get to use them in your future pieces.

Awesome entry Trep!

 

Very hilarious, Trep. Very hilarious.



Yours, Alkibiades

 

OKay, how did I miss this before... I'm laughing so hard I can barely see the screen.



Flaming Monkey Lizard, indeed.

CJM