***Nicht SW Zitate***

Aus der Reihe "stating the obvious":

"Individuelles Glück aber ist nur möglich in einem Leben, das nicht von leiblichem Schmerz und psychischer Qual beherrscht ist."

Martin Seel, Glück, wann weiß ich nicht, Jannes Philo-Lehrer kopiert schlampig, ohne Quellenangabe

 

*g* du liest dir den Kram tatsächlich durch?

 

nein, ich wollte nur etwas von dir besitzen, für meine neue VooDoo-Puppe. Achja, und das immense Porto solltest du bezahlen - ich will dich ruinieren.

Aber schöne Zeichnungen, diese Rankenpflanzen zwischen den Paragraphen

 

so sehen fast alle philosachen aus (sahen sie aus) langeweile

 

Ja, kenn ich, die Rückseiten meiner Notizen aus der 11. sahen nicht anders aus. Naja, anders schon, mehr SW, aber nicht unbedingt weniger voll

 

"dann meinte schröder bayern hätten und stoiber meinte dass ...", Janne, ICQ, gerade eben
? WAS!??

 

[...]"Mit Verlaub, Herr Präsident, Sie sind ein Arschloch", hatte Fischer 1984 im Bundestag getönt und sich eine Ordnungsstrafe eingehandelt. Der Adressat, Bundestagsvizepräsident Richard Stücklen, hatte zuvor der Grünen-Abgeordneten Christa Nickels das Mikrofon abgedreht.
Die Grünen galten in ihrer damaligen ersten Wahlperiode im Bundestag als absolute Bürgerschrecks, schon weil viele von ihnen mit langen Haaren und Grobstrickpullovern deutlich von den Parlamentskollegen in Schlips und Kragen abstachen.

 

Ich habe keine Ahnung ob wir das schon hatten, hatte aber auch keine Idde wo ich es sonst schreiben sollte, also kommt das jetzt einfach hierhin

1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.

10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

EVER WONDER

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor,
and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes?
Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

In case you needed further proof that the human race is
doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions
on consumer goods.

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.
( and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos:! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be how???....)

On some Swanson frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
"Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this ! save me more time)?

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a
car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents
if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and...I'm taking this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to...what)?

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."

 

Zufall, dass ich gerade jetzt auch posten will?


"If someone can honestly sleep better at night happily believing that Lucas is an out of touch hack and the prequels are little more than elaborate toy commercials, who am I to disturb their rest? It's really none of my business, and ultimately, none of my concern."
- Paul F. McDonald, here, September 17, 2002

 

da ich momentan (für mein verhältnis) viele filme sehe, hier ein wunderbares zitat aus "Last Man Standing", Neo-Western (laut Fernseh-Zeitung) mit Bruce Willis, Yeah-Baby-Yeah:

"Betrunken oder nüchtern, ich hatte keinen Grund mich zu beklagen."

Dann ein wenig TV-Highlights der letzten Wochen:

Austin Powers 2:
Dr. Evil nach seiner ungewollten Karusselfahrt auf seinem Drehstuhl:
"Na gut; jetzt wird gekotzt!"

oder auch

Frantic mit Uns-Harrison, gestern abend auf Kabel1 gelaufen:

"Wie buchstabieren Sie das?"
"Mit einem A wie Arschloch!"
hab keine lust die Szene zu beschreiben, wer den Film kennt, weiß was ich meine.

so, mehr zitate aus filmen die so gut sind, sie hier zu posten, fallen mir spontanerweise jetzt nicht ein.

bis zum nächsten mal,
euer uwe seeler!

 

anlässlich meiner kürzlich erworbenen Ocean's Eleven DVD:

"I'm not joking, Tess" - "I'm not laughing, Danny!"

"They said I payed my debt off society" - "Funny, I never got a check"

Resozialisierungstussi: "What would you do, if you were to get out?" - "I don't know, what do you guys make in a month?"

 

hat jemand in irgendeinem Forum als Signatur:

Die zehn Gebote Gottes enthalten 279 Wörter, die amerikanische Unabhängigkeitserklärung 300 Wörter, die Verordnung der europäischen Gemeinschaft über den Import von Karamelbonbons 25911 Wörter...

 

aus YJCC:

KoS: I'm about tired of this whole 'human' thing. Isn't it about time for another extinction? Please?

nyj: the human race are pathetic parasites

KoS: a virus with shoes.

Quelle



"Humans. Are. Disgusting.", Sid, Ice Age, 2002

 

"Knock your head against the door! If that doesn't open it, at least I'm in peace from any more stupid questions", Gandalf zu Pippin, FotR SE, 2002

BÖSE



(vielleicht ungenau)

- TLJ loves BB aka Pip

 

Da sind echt gute Szenen reingebaut in die SE...

 

Oh, hell yeah

guck ich gleich mit Mama

wir brauchen nen FotR-Thread

 

"I like to be mean!", Janne, Seite 4

 

"The only bad thing about this Extended version DVD is that it makes me think that all my other DVDs are boring...", Maladour-Fei, hier, über die FotR-SE-DVD

 

"Sex. Golf. Jedi Outcast.
3 things you can enjoy without being ANY good at !!", Blackouts signatur

 

"plotting a murder on the JC is probably against the TOS", malkieD2








Sagt mal, liest das hier überhaupt irgendjemand!??!
Ich fühl mich so einsam hier....

 

Danke

---

"We think, therefore we are. We do not think... we must be watching television."
- (unwichtig woher)

 

Doch tut ich, aber ich kann doch nichts dazu beitragen ohne lauter Fragen zu bekommen, was dass heißen soll.

 

"I have a life, I just haven't visited it lately.", DimensionX, hier

 

"receiving a full-screen DVD is on par with receiving a gunshot to the crotch", Pooja, hier