Before - Legends Not Hers to Keep - Mother's Day Challenge Response - Shmi and Anakin

Title: Not Hers to Keep
Author: VaderLVR64
Characters: Shmi, Anakin, Qui-Gon
Notes: Written for the Mother?s Day Challenge


Not Hers to Keep


?It?s a boy!?

The midwife?s announcement was punctuated by the newborn?s outraged howls. Wearily, Shmi reached out for her son, the pain of bringing him into the galaxy already fading from her mind.

As he was placed in her arms, Shmi observed with amazement as the baby?s cries immediately began dwindling. Finally, he gazed up at her with wide eyes, as if surprised to see her there. ?Hello,? she whispered, cupping his downy head in her hand. ?I?m your mother.?

?He?s going to be a big man,? Marrja the midwife noted as she grasped one of his feet in her hands. ?Look at these feet.?

The midwife?s apprentice giggled as she handed Shmi a blanket to wrap up the baby.

?Was his father tall?? the young girl asked.

Shmi looked at her, tried to remember the girl?s name and failed. Her name hardly mattered, the new mother thought dreamily. Her exhaustion was making her feel lightheaded and distance from everything except the baby in her arms. ?I have no idea?,? she murmured.

She did not see Marrja and the girl exchange knowing glances.

Carefully, Shmi wrapped the baby in the blanket and then snuggled him to her. He turned toward her, already instinctively seeking nourishment. Quickly, and with more skill than she had hoped for, Shmi positioned him to feed. The urgent tug of his mouth surprised her. It was strangely soothing, filling her with an odd sense of euphoria.

Marrja leaned in close and whispered, ?Don?t get too attached,? she advised. Marrja delivered all of the slaves? babies. ?It?ll just make it harder??

She let that thought trail off as their eyes met.

Shmi knew what she was hinting at, but the warmth of the baby in her arms, the pull of his mouth, and her own exhaustion kept the ugly truth at bay. ?All right,? she agreed dazedly. ?All right,? she said again, hardly aware of speaking.

Marrja stared at her for a moment and then sighed, shaking her head. ?He may not be yours to keep, Shmi,? she whispered.

The new mother did not hear her words. She heard only the soft sighs of the baby at her breast.


~~~~~~~~~


?Sold?? Shmi asked in horror.

?Lost,? the man corrected. ?Your Master lost you in a bet.?

Instinctively, Shmi tucked Anakin behind her, not that it would do any good. For once, he did not ask why; he simply held onto her skirts and hid his face in the folds of fabric. Her voice low and shaking, Shmi asked, ?What about?Anakin??

Behind her, she felt her son stiffen in fear. Though he was only three years old, he was wise with experience. He knew what sometimes happened to children. Slaves were not in control of their own destiny. Their lives belong to someone else.

It was a harsh truth he had realized at a very young age.

?The boy?? the man asked, obviously in a hurry to move on to the next task appointed by his employer. ?Oh?? He frowned. ?He goes with you.? He shrugged, as if it made no difference to him.

And it doesn?t, she thought. He could care less. We?re just slaves. Pieces of property?

?Thank you,? she murmured out of habit and not from gratitude. ?Thank you.?

The man barely acknowledged her words, already moving away. Shmi turned and gathered the trembling child into her arms.

?Shhhh,? she murmured, stroking her hands over his bright hair. ?It?s all right,? she soothed. ?You?re coming with me. No one is taking me away.?

Anakin?s arms wrapped around her neck, holding onto her with painful intensity. She did not attempt to loosen his hold. ?You?re mine,? she whispered, more to herself than to him. ?You?re my son.?

Even as she offered the words of comfort, she knew they had no real meaning in their world. But he was still hers for now?

Not to keep, but to cherish. She would settle for what she had, knowing that the future was uncertain. She kissed the little face s

 

That end with Shmi dieing. So heartbreaking beautiful.

A very moving piece. Great work.

 

That was beautiful, Kim! Wonderful insights on Shmi and her relationship with her son at various points throughout her life.

 

That was beautiful. It brought tears to my eyes and warmth to my heart. Well done

 

Beautiful.

I liked seeing this through Shmi's eyes, especially the ending:

He had made her complete the moment he had arrived in her life. Now she would pass out of this existence, sheltered in the warm protection of his arms. Anakin protested, as she knew he would. He doesn?t understand, she thought. He doesn?t know that it?s all right.

As a mother myself, I know that no matter how much we love our children, they aren't ours to keep -- someday they will leave us and move on, and that's all right. The fact that we got to hold them for a little while makes life whole. Beautifully written!

 

If I'm crying, it's my own fault!

This had "read at your own risk' written all over it.

And of course delivers 1000%

 

That was so bittersweet.

I'm not surprised Shmi knew Anakin wasn't hers to keep for very long and I love that she made the most of their time together.

I just wish they could have had a lifetime together



Great response to the challenge

 

WOW amazing!

That was so very powerful. Very nicely done from Shmi's POV. wow.

Dana

 

A beautiful response to the challenge. I liked the sense of Shmi looking over her life in her delirium and realizing that her end was not such a bad thing. It made Anakin's reappearance almost unnecessary. It was a blessing for her, though.

 

MamaV!!!! I'm crying in the cafeteria!!!!! That was soo beautiful...heartbreaking even! I so admire Shmi for understanding and being willing to let go so Anakin could become what he had to be....wow. You communicated every little nuance so amazingly....

Amazing!!!!!
Irish

 

Wonderful depiction! Great job!

 

He murmured something and she struggled to make sense of it. Her pain was receding now, ebbing away from her swiftly, leaving behind only a warm euphoria. It was all right now; she was safe.

Nothing could hurt her anymore. Ani was with her.



What a poignant, yet beautiful glimpse into Shmi's life. Fantastic work, as always!

 

Wow... Loved this. Shmi's story just breaks my heart, and this... illustrates her beautifully.


Well done.

 

Ending with Shmi's death was so heartbreaking, but very fitting! Shmi's life was very hard.