[NRW] The explanation for IT ALL! (image heavy)

Discussion in 'Literature' started by Charlemagne19, Aug 7, 2006.

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  1. Charlemagne19 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jul 30, 2000
    star 7
    Okay, I've finally figured out how exactly it ALL fits together.

    The Clone Wars begins thanks to the machinations of Count Dooku and Darth Sidious whom hire the Kaminoans to prepare 3,000,000 clones at a cheap price while secretly having a vast number of clones created by another source in order to provide them with all the troops. This clone source was Altha Prime or as he's called in Galaxy-616....

    The High Evolutionary.

    [image=http://www.geocities.com/ratmmjess/evolutionary.jpg]

    Yes, once you combine Marvel Universe continuity with Star Wars, it all starts to make sense.

    These clones created by the High Evolutionary were so powerful that they immediately overwhelmed the Confederate Forces even as they eventually became bloated, insane, and quite bizarre. This would result in Captain Pellaeon ending up fighting many of them in the mis-named Clone Saga.

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/02/ULTSM100_100.jpg]

    However, this situation only would herald an even greater threat as the Emperor had long ago become aware of a threat that was greater than any in the galaxy. This had lured him to seek out ultimate power in hopes of protecting the universe. Yes, the threat of...

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/c9/Galactus.PNG]

    GALACTUS THE WORLD DEVOURER

    There would be some confusion of course because the GFFA had not yet encountered Galactus and instead believed the time spanning sentient planet Eon, which would father the Yuuzhan Vong race (or as the GI Joe comics would have you believe...NOT the terrorist organization of Cobra).

    [image=http://www.marvel.com/universe3zx/images/thumb/7/7a/Eon.jpg/442px-Eon.jpg]

    Zonoma Seskot's father.

    [image=http://www.joeheadquarters.com/charpics/golobulus.jpg]

    The face of Overlord Shimmra?

    This results in the Star spanning blue skinned, technologically advanced, militant race of stoics in the Kree Empire to send their most important and brilliant member to prepare the galaxy for the coming of the World Devourer.

    CAPTAIN MAR-VEL

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/05/CaptainMarvel.jpg]

    Captain Mar-vel would thus have his death faked via cancer but also to cover up his race's involvement. They code named the Kree Empire with the title of Chiss, dyed the albino member of their race blue like higher caste members (cleverly alluded to in Outbound Flight). The only clue to his true identity were his red eyes that revealed the quantum bands energy that still coursed through him.

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/c0/Thrawn-hq2x.jpg]

    Of course, the 'Chiss' would be devastated and be unable to recover to aid the galaxy against Galactus' might for some 40 years due to the events of Operation: Galactic Storm but that's beside the point. The galaxy was plunging into a horrific and mind numbing state of dread and horror thanks to the efforts of a hidden manipulator.

    A manipulator whom bore THIS face...

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/4/4b/Jjportrait.jpg]

    The Skrull Empire also had plans for the greater galaxy as a whole and had long ago made contact with the struggling civilization through infiltrators. Taking the form of a demented alien, he 'conveinantly' was able to join with the galaxy's protectors in the Jedi Knighthood and from there arranged for the collapse of Sidious' noble plans on Naboo to advert a war to unite the galaxy. From there he corrupted the Sith Lord and turned him towards evil with Skrull mind-control techniques, paving the way for an all out Skrull invasion.

    This would have gone off perfectly if not for the invervention of Immortus.

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/2/27/Immortus_001.jpg]

    The absolute master of time foresaw the ultimate Skrull domination of the universe so he arranged the Clone Wars to suddenly jerk from decades in the past before the Empire's rise to something far more immediate with his vast time travel powers, but like so many alterations of histor
  2. Kidan TFN EU Staff

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    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2003
    star 5
    :eek:[face_hypnotized]:D=D=[face_dancing]


    Wonderfully graet job Charlemagne!!!!!
  3. Lord Vivec Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Apr 17, 2006
    star 7
  4. RK_Striker_JK_5 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 2, 2003
    star 7
    *Gasp!*

    Ye gods, you've done it! The retcon to end all retcons!

    It all makes sense...
  5. JediMasterNicolas Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 4, 2005
    star 3
    Charlemagne...marry me[face_love]


    That.....was.....awesome! =D= =D= =D=
  6. Master_Palpy Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 29, 2004
    star 2
    By the powers that be, this retcon rocks!

    But the first one to quote Charlemagne's post gets blasted! :mad: :p

    Great job!
  7. ThrawnRocks Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 10, 2004
    star 6
  8. Charlemagne19 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jul 30, 2000
    star 7
    The information is also clear.

    A pacifistic, sweet, and yet nevertheless arrogant man in a future where peace and order is the rule eventually becomes enamored of more conquest driven ages. Discovering time travel abilities, this figure will then go back in time to become figures of conquest in the past.

    Now, am I describing Kang the Conqueror

    or am I describing....

    JACEN SOLO!?!


    Yes, where did the mysterious Exile come from with his abilities to form lasting attachments yet ruthlessly persecute his enemies? Yes, indeed, it was Jacen all along! All the while seeking to displace the REAL Jedi Exile whom was a female!

    Thankfully, Jaina Solo would time travel back herself after immitating the abilities of her brother in order to stop him but would overshoot the mark and attempt to pass herself off as Darth Revan.

    (Sadly, this was because Jaina was an abyssmal student of history rather than an attempt to replace the mythical figure)
  9. JediMasterNicolas Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 4, 2005
    star 3
  10. Charlemagne19 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jul 30, 2000
    star 7
    *Whistles*

    Guys, I know you love the pictures but you don't need to quote them. It more or less kills any ability for me to do more pictures.

    ;-)

    Some people are still on dial up out there.
  11. Master_Palpy Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 29, 2004
    star 2
    :oops: Now, where's that DL-44 I keep hidden in my desk... :p
  12. Master_Keralys Sometime Technical Aide and Erstwhile Lit Mod

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 2003
    star 5
    Did you forget the part about skin dyes on the albinos? :rolleyes: Silly man! He meant that is Thrawn, after he took off his makeup after Ruhk's "assassination." Duh! :p

    - Keralys
  13. ThrawnRocks Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 10, 2004
    star 6
    To Master_Keralys, you listen.

    EDIT: Or if you want to get technical it could be Flim...
  14. Charlemagne19 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jul 30, 2000
    star 7
    But yes, whom would ever suspect:

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/1/1f/Revan.jpg/250px-Revan.jpg]
    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/1/1f/Revan.jpg/250px-Revan.jpg

    is actually

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/1/17/Jaina.jpg]
    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/1/17/Jaina.jpg

    ????

    It would also certainly explain why the Exile is female yet this is viewed as a picture of him...

    [image=http://starwars.wikia.com/images/d/de/Jediexile.jpg]
    http://starwars.wikia.com/images/d/de/Jediexile.jpg

    Seem familiar with the right dye and hair stylist?

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/d9/Jacen.jpg]
    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/d9/Jacen.jpg

    All a plot by the future

    [image=http://www.marveldatabase.com/wiki/images/b/b1/Kang_001.jpg]

    Whom LIKE Jacen, already has a history of killing his girlfriends.
  15. Thanos6 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 20, 1999
    star 4
    *worships*

    Wonder if Thanos and Maelstrom could fit in...
  16. Charlemagne19 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jul 30, 2000
    star 7
    The origin of Thanos as the individual whom is involved with the Star Wars universe is a very clear and easy one. Already, we know the Celestials...

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/7/70/Thor424.jpg/387px-Thor424.jpg]

    Created Centerpoint, the Savage Land, the Asgardians, the Eternals, Apocalypse, and numerous other species. Which of course would induce Thanos of Titan (one of the Eternals) to go investigate their experiments that would eventually give birth to the Rakata. Thanos worships a creed that exalts death, destruction, passion, and freedom....

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/2/2f/Thanos.PNG/531px-Thanos.PNG]

    SOUND FAMILIAR?

    Yes, Thanos eventually went to one of the worlds that the Rakata had taken over and there proceeded to free the primitive people while seeking Celestial artifacts. There, Thanos with his awesome might successfully single handidly destroyed the Rakata forces and set himself up as god king of the people (an amusement for the people). Thanos shared his immense and mighty knowledge with this race and had his brain engrams transferred into the first of the holocrons. Thus, did the people become known as the Sith (the Eternals being the inspiration for various Celtic and other divine legends).

    Thanos was given the name Supreme Sith and thus was the legend of Adas formed. It also explains how a single military leader, no matter how brilliant can defeat a Star Spanning Empire. Thanos does it all the time.

    I point to Thanos' quotes to describe the Sith philosophy....

    * "I now hold omnipotence. What should I do with such almighty power? The answer to that is actually quite simple: Anything I want. Anything. I am incapable of error. Any result that displeases me I can simply reverse. There is nothing I need to worry on, for I am Thanos. And Thanos is supreme. Supreme."

    * "Am I not Thanos?! Did I not butcher the woman who gave me birth, who force-fed me into this hell called life?! Is not the wake of my passing crimson with the blood of my enemies and allies alike?! Death is with me every second of the day! My every moment is spent in either dealing out death or worshipping it! So tell me, who under the stars is better suited than I to be Death's consort?"

    * "You address omnipotence. Tread carefully."

    * "Truth is a subjective concept."

    * "Death, thunderer, is like love-making. It gets better each time."

    * "Destiny awaits." (from Marvel Super Heroes arcade game)

    * "Who would have thought that becoming God would be such a hollow victory" -Thanos Quest Book 2

    * "My name is Thanos, and my name means Death" Thanos Quest Book 1


    It is quite likely that Thanos' evil activities resulted in the figure known as Adam Warlock journeying to the distant past to share his cosmic truths gained from the Soul Gem to oppose Thanos' followers and thus were the Jedi Knighthood born. The fact that Adam Warlock believed that omnipotence could only be properly wielded with all emotion divorced from his personage may explain why that the Jedi code took shape with its curious mixture of benevolent seeking of peace yet simultaneously its seemingly inhuman exaltation of logic.

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/5/54/Warlock_I_9.jpg]

    The fact that the Jedi are born from an order of monks and Adam Warlock is a spiritual leader whose worshippers were known to wear brown robes is further evidence to the veracity of this. The lightsaber may have been invented by Adam being accompanied by one of the Avengers known for his frequent time travelling escapades....

    [image=http://www.marveldatabase.com/wiki/images/6/66/Black_Knight_III_001.gif]

    (for lack of finding a good lightsaber picture)

    Adam Warlock is even known for having 'fallen to the Dark Side' and become the Magus so its likely that his teachings were tainted even from the beginning.
  17. JediMasterNicolas Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 4, 2005
    star 3

    If ment for me then, :oops: I didn't catch his meaning.


    EDIT: Also, I obviously didn't understand the meaning of "don't quote the pictures", though in my defense I was quoting his quoting of the pictures....go ahead, shoot!

    :p
  18. Thanos6 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 20, 1999
    star 4
  19. Thrawn McEwok Co-Author: Essential Guide to Warfare

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    Member Since:
    May 9, 2000
    star 6
    For the idea that Palpatine is Apocalypse alone, you get a Very Large Cookie?.

    This... could be made to work. [face_laugh]

    Of course, you can't have this without the Blackhole/Essex idea as an inevitable collateral... but even more obviously than that, Mara Jade...

    [image=http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/ATA/25282MV~Jean-Grey-Kissing-Wolverine-Posters.jpg]

    ... is a time-travelling Jean Grey...

    [image=http://www.jadesabre.com/images/maralukeben.jpg]

    ... trying to protect her son by Logan - Anakin Skywalker!

    And this plot must involve the Askani - who are thus revealed as none other than the Fallanassi!

    But all of this leaves just one question: who was Ashka Boda? o_O

    - The Imperial Ewok
  20. Ender Sai Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Feb 18, 2001
    star 9
    Wouldn't the Punisher therefore be a Mandalorian on earth, struggling with a hitherto unknown condition (we call it a conscience ;)) and the limits of Earth tech?

    E_S
  21. Rogue_Follower Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Nov 12, 2003
    star 6
    Nope. The Punisher is actually Valance the Hunter. [face_mischief]

    I'm editing out some of those redundant pictures in quotes, since they take up bandwidth and waste space. And, as C19 says, its a browser killer for those with dial-up. ;)
  22. Charlemagne19 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jul 30, 2000
    star 7
    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/ec/Quasar_%28comics%29.jpg]

    and

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/4/42/Lukepromo2321.jpeg]

    Coincidence? I think not.

    The answer is that Luke Skywalker is in fact actually the character of the Guardian of the Universe. His identity as an agent of SHIELD (without a killer instinct) is actually the result of Luke having a period during the largely underdeveloped period of his time after ANH to journey to the planet Earth in order to investigate the origins of the Jedi where he was recognized by Zonoma Seskot's father and bestowed upon the Quantum Bands.

    The presence of these bands allowed him to journey to and from the Star Wars galaxy (originally arriving through ancient Rakatan technology amnesiac) and galaxy-616 with incredible ease. It also explains his constantly fluctuating power level with the Force. It also explains why Quasar is never in the Marvel universe for more than a dozen issues.

    ;-)

    Luke Skywalker's appearance on Earth was also briefly documented on The Muppet Show.
  23. Ender Sai Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Feb 18, 2001
    star 9
    It's also funny how you noted Golobulous from the GI Joe movie in there; dp had forever been pointing to that as a basis for the Yuuzhan Vong, and most thought him delirious or on crack (a valid point, though). I saw it again 2 years back, turns out he was right!

    ES
  24. Charlemagne19 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jul 30, 2000
    star 7
    In the tradition of Marvel Heroes, Luke Skywalker also has two love interests. One of which is feisty and redheaded while the other is cold and blonde.

    Example, Cyclops...

    Jean Grey: [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/c/cc/Jeangreyendsong.png/363px-Jeangreyendsong.png]

    Emma Frost: [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/a/a7/Emmaf165.png]

    Peter Parker:

    Gwen Stacy: [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/3/3d/Gwenspidey.PNG]

    Mary Jane Watson: [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/f/fb/Maryjaneross.png]

    Luke Skywalker:

    Mara Jade:[image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/7/73/Maralukeben.jpg]

    Callista:[image=http://starwars.wikia.com/images/8/83/Callistafight.jpg]

  25. Charlemagne19 Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Jul 30, 2000
    star 7
    But what REALLY needs an explanation is this...

    Mace Windu

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/c/c0/Macewindu.jpg]

    Nick Fury, Agent of Shield

    [image=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/e8/UltimateNickFury.jpg]

    My current theory is a random dimensional opening (they happen!) caught Mace and deposited him on Galaxy-616 where he put his Jedi skills to use in helping the Ultimates.
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