Provo "Obi-Wan Kenobi reveals secrets on the next Sally"

Discussion in 'SouthWest Region Discussion' started by Marna_Veign, Mar 13, 2002.

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  1. Marna_Veign Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 31, 2002
    star 4
    I've been sick lately, so perhaps this crazy idea comes from that. Ever wonder what it would be like to get 'Old Ben', Luke, Leia, and Vader on Sally to 'Tell a loved one a secret you've been keeping'? Can you picture it? I think it would begin as follows:

    Sally: Now, I'd like to introduce our first guest. Obi-Wan Kenobi, Jedi Knight and General from the Clone Wars.
    (Obi-Wan enters and sits.)
    Sally: Welcome.
    Obi-Wan: Thank you, Sally. I'm glad to be here. This air conditioning is nice after living on Tatooine for many years.
    Sally: I imagine it is. Now then, can I call you Ben?
    Obi-Wan: Everyone else does.
    Sally: Ben, you have a secret you would like to reveal.
    Obi-Wan: Yes. I've been carrying this secret with me for, oh so many years. I feel as though I don't have much time left before I die. I am an old man.
    Sally: Yes. Tell us about this secret.
    Obi-Wan: Well, a family I know had been split up when the twins were just babies. I'm getting too old to keep this kind of secret, and I want to let them know that they are family. Perhaps things will get better if they know.
    Sally: Now this family, the boy, Luke, had been sent to Tatooine to be raised by moisture farmers, correct?
    Obi-Wan: Yes. I stayed nearby, though, to keep an eye on him. And his sister, Leia, was sent to Alderaan. She was adopted by Bail Organa. Even at that young age, I could tell both twins were strong in the Force.
    Sally: The Force?
    Obi-Wan: It's an energy field that surrounds us, and penetrates us. It binds the Galaxy together.
    Sally: Okay. Tell us a little about their father.
    Obi-Wan: He was a pupil of mine until he turned to evil. He has risen to a position where he's second only to the Emperor.
    Sally: I see. He's backstage now. Are you ready to greet him?
    Obi-Wan stands, hand resting on the hilt of his lightsaber. The Imperial March plays, and Darth Vader strides onto the stage.
    Vader: I've been waiting a long time, Obi-Wan Kenobi. We meet again, at last. The circle has been completed. When last we met, I was but the learner. Now I am the Master.
    Obi-Wan: Only a master of evil, Darth.
    (Vader ignites his lightsaber, and security all around the stage pull their guns.)
    Sally: Darth Vader, you agreed not to attack anybody on this show today. I believed you to be a man who keeps his word.
    (Vader puts his lightsaber away)
    Sally: Much better. We will be back in a few moments.
    (Camera pans out and shows Vader and Obi-Wan eyeing eachother unsteadily)
  2. Marold Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 17, 2001
    star 6
    cool.

    Now think if they were one Jerry Springer, wait no don't think that. It will ruin everything.
  3. Marna_Veign Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 31, 2002
    star 4
    This is the sort of thing that happens when one of my family gets sick. I mean, we're wierd to start with, and crazily creative, but add a mild fever, and watch out. Same thing happens when I stay up until about 3:00 am. ;)

    I wasn't really sure where to post this. It isn't a role-play, nor is it really good enough to be a FanFic(it would get lost in the shuffle) so I decided to share it here.
    I've invited a friend of mine to check it out. I told him you guys don't bite. ;)
  4. spoo Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 16, 2001
    star 4
    I wrote a Jerry Springer one a long time ago in this forum. I thought it was funny (that doesn't necissarily mena it WAS funny...)
  5. Renegade4E Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2002
    star 1
    In one of my film classes one group used the talk show set at KBYU and spliced in footage from a Springer or Sally show and made it as if they were the real show and it was hilarious!
  6. Kendu_Knight Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 2, 2001
    star 4
    Hey there, Marna :)

    Sounds good so far. Keep it up. Can't wait to see what happens :D
  7. Marna_Veign Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 31, 2002
    star 4
    Sally: We're back now. With me I have General Obi-Wan Kenobi and Darth Vader, Dark Lord of the Sith. Now, Vader, you know that you are here to meet your twin children for the first time. Are you worried about what they might think of you being second only to the leader ofn the evil Galactic Empire?
    Vader: If my son joins me, we can rule the galaxy as father and son.
    Sally: Okay, I take it you don't care what they think. Your children are backstage now. They have no idea why they are here. Let's bring out your daughter. Princess Leia Organa, member of the Imperial Senate.
    (Leia comes out with the cinnabun hair style and white senatorial robes.)
    Leia: Darth Vader, only you could be so bold.
    Obi-Wan: Actually, Leia, I am the one who wanted you here.
    Sally: Have a seat, Princess. Do you know why you are here?
    Leia: Not really. All I know is that there was a pesky farmboy from Tattoine staring at me backstage. Really bothersome.
    Sally: Now, I hear you are the youngest senator in the Imperial Senate.
    Leia: Yes. I've worked hard for it, and I feel I've done a good...
    (Vader stands, pointing a finger at Leia)
    Vader: You are part of the Rebel Alliance and a traitor!
    Sally: Vader, contain yourself, or we will have to bring out someone I don't want to.
    (Vader sits)
    Sally: What would you say, Leia, if I told you that the farmboy has something to do with you.
    Leia: What?!
    Obi-Wan: Calm yourself. There is something I need to tell you, but I want Luke out here before I do.
    Sally: Luke Skywalker will join us when we return from these messages.
    (Camera pans out. Sally sits easily. Leia is staring down Vader, and Obi-Wan still has his hand on his saber, just in case.)
  8. Detjen Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 27, 2002
    star 4
    So when does Vader start force choking the audience or maybe Sally?
  9. Kendu_Knight Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 2, 2001
    star 4
    It would turn into Jerry then ;)
  10. navaren Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 9, 2001
    star 3
    Now we know the real reason Sally was cancelled....::grins::
  11. Marna_Veign Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 31, 2002
    star 4
    Sally: We're back. With me is General Obi-Wan "Ben" Kenobi, Jedi Knight of the Old Republic; Darth Vader, Dark Lord of the Sith; and Princess Leia, youngest member of the Imperial Senate. And now, we will be joined by my fourth and final guest, Luke Skywalker, a moisture farmer from Tatooine.
    (Luke walks on. His step falters a bit when he sees Vader.)
    Luke: Is that who I think it is?
    Sally: Darth Vader.
    (Luke sees Obi-Wan and continues onstage.)
    Luke: Ben? Ben Kenobi? Boy am I glad to see you. Especially with HIM here. (he speaks to Vader) I've heard of you.
    (Luke sits next to Leia, and she scoots a bit away, not wanting anything to do with the rugged boy.)
    Sally: Luke, Ben has something to tell you and the Princess. Ben?
    Obi-Wan: I have something to tell you about your father.
    Luke: You knew my father?
    Obi-Wan: Yes. He was the best star pilot in the galaxy. (glances at Vader) He and I fought together in the Clone Wars, as Jedi Knights.
    Luke: Uncle Owen told me he was a navigator on a spice freighter. He died a long time ago.
    Vader: No. I am your father.
    Luke: No. No! That's not true! That's impossible!

    This computer has frozen up twice, so I'll do more later.
  12. spoo Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 16, 2001
    star 4
    hmmm.. I still think my Jerry Springer one was better :D
  13. Marna_Veign Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 31, 2002
    star 4
    If anybody has any suggestions on what to happen next, go ahead. I feel better now, and can't think along the crazy likes I did to begin this.
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