Beyond Obi-Wan Workshop Beyond Challenge Updated 2/21!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by obi_ew, Feb 1, 2005.

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  1. tangled_sphere Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 28, 2003
    star 4
    LE, that was beautiful!

    As you read this, know that my sole wish in life has been granted. You?ve been rid of the monster that tried to take you, and you can breathe free again. I didn?t want it to be this way. I wanted to be there everyday.

    But the Universe would not halt for me. Seasons change, my Padawan, and so I saw the galaxy shift from one to the next. The Jedi were tugged in every direction. Each member of the Order was needed, as plights spread and multiplied across the worlds. I saw things that will haunt me long after I join with the Force. My only consolation was that you were sheltered, beyond the reach of the burgeoning Dark. I came to you in every spare moment, and gazed upon a face of purity, Light. You were an anchor, Obi-Wan, because I knew you were there, and I knew you were untainted.


    Sorry, had to copy all of that, [face_blush] it was so beautiful. I could just feel Obi-Wan's pain as he woke up, and that letter from Qui was touching.

    Beautiful story, LE, I didn't want it to end! [face_blush] It was so interesting viewing everything from Obi-Wan's perspective after all that time and of course you know how I feel about your writing :D

    Great job, LE!
  2. tangled_sphere Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 28, 2003
    star 4
    Now I want to see the other one you wrote! [face_batting]
  3. Shaindl Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 18, 2002
    star 4
    Nice job, LE. Very sad. :( But nicely written. :)

    Shaindl
  4. red rose knight Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 3, 2001
    star 4
    I?ll catch up on the last few stories tonight or tomorrow. :)

    This story didn?t work out as well as I was hoping, but if I put it off any longer, the mocking will become unbearable. :p






    "...Only now, at the end, do you understand."
    Emperor Palpatine, Return of the Jedi


    Grey crystals, the remnants of the ancient Obda Sa?ma mountain range, blew across the dunes; swirling about in a maddened dance as they gathered at the foot of the Patta Hallas Shrine. Once the cultural soul of the long extinct Sagru Kashinai, the structure still vibrated with their spiritual fire.

    The sands were slowly reclaiming the shrine, covering much of the granite that had once been as gray as the desert world itself. The grains seeped into the inner sanctums, covered the floor and clung to the rust colored walls. They had once been the color of the outside world, before the slaughter that had left the shrine merely to memory. Its ghosts were doomed to be forgotten in an ever-changing galaxy.

    The grains scattered the floor of the wide corridor leading to the Kam'ra, the sacred prayer chamber. It was situated toward the northwest, toward the brilliant star they called, Qadim, where their god Ruzinyol was born.

    Qadim was known on most star charts as Sol.

    That was where Ben Skywalker had picked up the assassin, Girune's, trail again, following him almost to the furthest edge of the Outer Rim. He would chase him into the unknown if required.

    "Abu'sta virhya!" Girune shouted as he bound forward, swinging the long, spear headed staff gracefully about in the corridor. Like an extension of the Kashinai warrior, the naginata reached out, the curved blade slicing through Ben's sleeve.

    The 22-year-old cried out as the burn laced through his body, stumbling backward he barely avoided the follow-up attack. He dodged a swing and rushed deep into the assassin's defenses. Pale blue fire lit the dimly illuminated corridor as he brought the lightsaber blade down, striking the staff. The weapon bounced off the tempered Den'luvian steel. Shock lit blue eyes.

    Girune did not miss a beat, striking Ben upside the head with the long rod. Air exploded from the young man's lungs as he was violently thrown to the ground. His weapon tumbled across the sandy floor just beyond his reach.

    Scrambling backward, Ben came to an abrupt stop the instant the assassin brought the tip of the long blade within millimeters of his throat. He swallowed carefully; fearful the slightest move would slice his flesh open.

    "Abu'sta Jay-dai!" Girune growled.

    Drawing his gaze away from the deadly weapon, Ben looked up into the white, expressionless eyes of the Kashinai warrior who loomed over him. Pushing back the fear that was winding dark tendrils around his heart, he glared at the being he had spent the last five weeks following, blocking and methodically driving across the galaxy. Driving him further away from his family. "This isn't over, assassin," he whispered.

    Girune grinned. "You have lost, Jedi pup," he said in thick accented Basic. "Accept your death and I shall honor you with a warrior's death."

    The fingers of Ben's left hand slowly drew into a tight ball, quivering as his knuckles paled from the stress.

    Without a word, almost without a sound, Ben reached out through the Force, commanding the energies. Grains of sand and broken stone swirled about, driven into a windless storm. Ducking away from the naginata at his throat, he commanded the hovering granite to come toward him.

    Never realizing what hit him, the assassin was slammed from behind by large chunks of shattered wall. His weapon tumbled helplessly to the side, as he was smashed into the ground.

    There was no hesitation as Ben leapt to his feet, willing an end to the storm and within the same thought, he called the silver and black hilt of his lightsaber to his hand. He had days ago reconciled the mercilessness of what must be done.

    Girune must die.

    No soft Republ/>
  5. Master_Noi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 8, 2004
    star 4
    LE - Beautiful story!

    Master - I can't believe you were worried. I can see that impatience runs as strong in the Skywalker family as the Force. Nice description of Obi. [face_love]
  6. obi_ew Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 14, 2002
    star 5
    LE Sweet. :) See it wasn't so hard was it? :D

    Red Loved it! Ben is very interesting and I look forward to learning more about him. ;) =D=
  7. Shaindl Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 18, 2002
    star 4
    Great job, Red! Ben and Ben's interaction was really interesting. Loved seeing Luke and Mara and Ben Jr together too. :)
  8. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    Since I never come over here, I keep forgetting to check out the fics. [face_blush] But here goes..

    VaderLVR64 Great job with Luke and Mara (my favorite couple. You blaze in the Force pretty much says it all with Mara. Lovely.

    Drabbo You have quite a sense of humor. Loved that they brought Obi back to life and then killed him off immediately. LOL.

    VaderLVR64 It always amazes me how quickly you can write these. Loved the way Luke told Anakin that they were naming the baby Ben. Very sweet.

    zebra3 Loved that Obi-Wan gave Alema the lightsaber to defend herself. And that she found a way to get rid of the hatred filling her. Good job.

    ThrawnRocks Very funny. Loved the Ewok dreams and the jokester, Obi-Wan. LOL. Poor Thrawn!

    VaderLVR64 Loved the gentle way that Ben took care of the Obi clone. Sweet. And I thought you did a great job explaining how the clone would feel waking up. Nicely done!

    kma Loved Luke thinking he was a Jedi love child..LOL. And Luke getting rid of the attachment rule. Way to go, Luke! Great job.

    jade Loved the banter between Kyp and Obi-Wan. I could just picture this 80 year old giving Kyp a run for his money. Very funny.

    Lady_Jedi_Carenix This was rather shivery with the angry people after Jacen and a dead person saves him. I liked that Jacen wasn't sure if it was a dream or not. Good job.

    More tomorrow.


  9. Knight_Dilettante Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 24, 2002
    star 4
    LE :_| Waaaaaaa!!!! I'm a tad confused about when this is occuring and why Luke is there so I think you better keep writing this. An Obi-Wan young enough to guide Luke and Leia for a while is rather interesting. (oooh look a bunny...)

    RRK Whoa! That was... wow.

    I may have to stop reading these. It's going to make me end up reading the EU novels eventually and I don't have time for that now. Not that I am likely to be able to give up reading these.

    KD
  10. Jedikma Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 4
    LE

    Nicely written. I bet you get bonus points for using braided Obi, too. :D


    red

    Loved it! I just loved Obi-Wan in this and I think you should get triple the points for using beardy paunchy Obi! [face_love] I loved Obi-Wan's warmth and humor. I also liked the interaction between Ben and Luke and Mara. Well done! :)
  11. TKeira_Lea Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 10, 2002
    star 5
    Obi on the ByTS!

    [face_dancing]

    VaderLVR64: Wow! You are prolific!

    Shine He assumed a look of injured dignity. ?You would question the word of a Jedi??
    ?I question the word of what is clearly an apparition that is probably the result of too little sleep and too much shaak steak,? Mara grumbled.
    Obi-Wan settled in a chair, putting his hands on his knees. ?Well now, I?m not quite sure what to say to that,? he admitted. ?Are you always this difficult??
    ?I?ve heard that I am,? she replied, clearly unrepentant.


    Two very unique senses of humor going toe to toe. [face_laugh] Loved it!

    A Name of Honor I just liked the whole idea behind that one =D=

    Welcome Back Brilliant! :D

    Drabbo: Anakin the Younger is going to be the death of my poor Obi.

    Zebra3: Alema and Obi! Woohoo! Gotta love the Little Blue Twilek [face_batting]

    Well done and the premise that she would find his lightsaber was brilliant!

    ThrawnRocks: ?Very well. Good night, sleep tight, and don't let the Noghri bite!" [face_laugh]

    Jedikma: I liked old as dirt Obi [face_love]

    JadeSolo: Kyp and Obi? Interesting. I think Obi would have been a great mentor for Kyp, based on lessons learned from Anakin. Talk about a bum deal ? your first Padawan is the Chosen One who became the not so Chose One.

    ?I have every right to be tired. I?m old.?
    Yeah?I know that feeling.

    *give me my wings I say*

    Lady_Jedi_Carenix: I concur with OE, I could almost hear Alec Guinness? voice.


    Okay, I?ve gotten through two pages, and I?m thoroughly enjoying these entries. I?ll be back for more input for the rest later!
  12. Koori Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2004
    star 3
    Amaris Talarie is the OC character from The Emperor's Daughter. There could be more to this little plot bunny, but I haven't decided if it needs it. And I will admit there is a little inspiration from red_rose_knight's shower stories here.

    The Shower Incident

    Amaris Talarie winced slightly as her foot touched the cold deck of the ?fresher. She really ought to suggest to Solo that he invest in a mat. Or better yet, perhaps she should just invest in one for him. Entrusting him to do so would only be a waste of time and result in more cold feet. Decision made to investigate the mat possibilities when they were next planet-side, Amaris stepped the rest of the way out of the shower.

    The first sign that something was wrong was the sudden shift she felt in the Force. The second was the fact that there was now a man standing in the ?fresher with her. A man she had never seen before in her life. He appeared to be around thirty with shoulder length ginger hair and the strangest blue-grey eyes she had ever seen. He was also stark naked and dripping wet, but those were facts that Amaris was trying very hard to ignore. Considering that she was, herself, in a similar condition.

    ?How? Why? Where am I?? the man stammered.

    Amaris rolled her eyes. Men! Always asking questions. Reaching over she grabbed the towel from the rack next to her. She wrapped the towel around her while she searched for another one for the stranger. She found it quickly and moved to hand it to him, but decided against it. It was far easier to interrogate someone when you had something they wanted.

    ?Excuse me, but may I have that?? the man asked eyeing the towel.

    Amaris smiled at him. ?No. At least not until you?ve given me reason to give it to you.?

    ?I am Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi, and I demand that you give me that towel!?

    ?Oh! Is that who you are?? She crossed her arms in front of her. ?Well, that?s one mystery solved.?

    ?Great, I?m glad we now know who I am,? Kenobi glared at her indignantly. ?Who are you??

    ?Amaris!? Leia?s voice came through the door. ?Are you alright??

    Kenobi?s eyes went wide and he made a grab for the towel in Amaris?s arms. He slipped, though, and ended up crashing to the deck narrowly missing hitting his head. Amaris put her hand over her mouth to stifle a laugh.

    ?Amaris!?

    ?I?m fine, Leia,? Amaris was nearly in tears from trying not to laugh.

    ?Do you mind?? Kenobi whispered from where he lay at her feet.

    She smiled down at him, enjoying the view. ?Not at all,? she dropped the towel over his head.
  13. obi_ew Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 14, 2002
    star 5
    Wet nekkid Obi! [face_batting] That earns you a limitless supply of bonus points. :D
  14. Master_Noi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 8, 2004
    star 4
    Well, that raised the temperature in here a little bit. =P~
  15. LuvEwan Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 24, 2002
    star 4
    It was far easier to interrogate someone when you had something they wanted.

    [face_laugh] That was a great line.

    And may I say: hubba hubba. [face_rasied_brow]
  16. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    KD I really loved how you pulled Anakin and Obi-Wan into the story. All the errands that Obi put Han through and they paid off - later, much later. Good job.

    OEI loved this one. You got Jacen just right with the whole thinking about the Force thing. And Obi-Wan's comments about Vergere "Just between me and you, I?ve always felt she was more than a bit off in the head." [face_laugh] Gotta love that!

    Wonderfully done.

    Noi I loved that Obi-Wan was trying to be the intermediary between Anakin and Leia. His last comment was so irreverent ?I never liked that my padawan fell in love with a senator from Naboo. LOL.
    Great job.


    Shaindl Oh, I loved that you showed Han in his drunken, mourning stage. Not too many people do that and I think you got him just right. I liked that Obi-Wan was able to get through to him and allow him to see that his family needed him. Wonderful!

    NenYim Very funny. I didn't know Kenobi had such a Janson sense of humor. But never get in the way of a bored dead Jedi. LOL. Kyp kissing Jaina. He's in trouble now. Good job.


  17. leandrastar2000 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 6, 2004
    star 2
    Well, just checked these stories out and may I say, WOW what a variety of ideas, all of them good. I really enjoyed reading them and may even contribute a story myself. Great job everybody!
  18. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    I'm behind on reading this, but hope to catch up soon! Bravo to all these wonderful authors!
  19. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    OE Very funny. Those three kids are the Sith in disguise, I tell you. LOL on bringing back Qui-Gon to train them. [face_laugh] Good job.

    Bekah I liked the interaction between Anakin Solo and Obi-Wan. The fact that Obi-Wan hadn't yet met Amidala or Anakin or even Luke and Leia in his dream should have sent bells ringing in his head. I liked that Anakin was telling him to let go. Good advice. Hope he takes it! Wonderful.

    tangled_sphere I really loved how you connected Jacen with Obi-Wan, his almost turning into a Vong helper was quite chilling. Loved his musings, too, and the way he had to think his way through. And in the end, it was love that helped him see the Light.

    Great job.

    LE Oh, I loved that Obi-Wan went past the Purges because Qui-Gon couldn't let him suffer any more. It must be quite a horrible thing to wake up years later and know that everything you've known and loved is gone. Very chilling but at least the ending was a slight bit happy. He's alive and Luke is still there to train.

    Great job with this, LE.

    rrk Loved the whole Ben Skywalker thing. He's a character with a lot of potential and I think you've really melded the parent's characteristics in him very well. I liked that he was willing to go after the bad guy and sacrifice himself to save his family. Loved the fight. I could really picture it so clearly and his discussion with kenobi was wonderful.. great job.

    Koori Loved the naked Obi-Wan. LOL. And her leaving him the towel on his... head was priceless. Wonderful.

  20. PadawanKitara Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2001
    star 5
    Oh Wow- too many to attempt to catch up on at one time. But have to say that I am getting a whole new appreciation for the beyond. That is what you wanted, isn't it o_e?


    and naked obi ain't bad either =P~
  21. TKeira_Lea Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 10, 2002
    star 5
    Back again!

    Obi for Valentine?s Day [face_love] Why not?

    KD: "I'm not doing you any more favors, Old Man."

    *snickers*

    Loved the Obi/Ani banter. Just like old times?

    oe: Wow! I think you?ve got Jacen down pat! =D= I just loved his introspection, and that Anakin (the Younger) would have understood him better than Jaina. Spot on.

    In a weird way I think the Jedi Order is going to let Anakin (the Older) sort of sink into the darkness of the Sith hoping he?ll lead them to their enemy. Much like what Jacen is going through here. It was a fun juxtaposition.

    "That?s impossible."

    The stranger's lips twitched at his retort. "That?s your uncle speaking."

    "I suppose you?re going to tell me you knew Uncle Luke also?"

    "I was once his tutor."

    Jacen vigorously shook his head in denial. "Uncle Luke was taught by two of the greatest Jedi to ever live. Master Yoda and Ben Kenobi."

    "Obi-Wan Kenobi."

    "You knew Obi-Wan Kenobi also?"

    "Of course I knew him! He?s me!"


    Loved that whole exchange. I know it was younger Obi but I could hear Alec Guinness say that last line.

    Can?t wait to see you write more Jacen!

    Noi: Wow! That was a great way to resolve their renewed friendship (in the afterlife) O:) I really enjoyed your little viggie.


    Halfway through! I'll be back with more. These are so much fun ;)
  22. Zebra3 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 28, 2004
    star 5
    Shaindl: Voices in my head. As if I didn?t have enough to deal with
    Great way to portray Han! I love his interaction with Obi-Wan :)

    NenYem: [face_laugh] That's so Jaina! [face_laugh]

    obi-ew: Jumping to his feet he fled the trio as fast as his legs would carry him. Watching as the young Jedi vanished into the jungle foliage, Anakin pouted.
    [face_laugh] Great job!

    Bekah_K: Ohh! Very good story! Love the idea of Anakin Solo and Obi-Wan meeting! :)

    tangled_sphere: Hearing her voice, he rushed over and embraced her. At that moment, he felt complete, and he felt like he would never let go again.
    :_| Excellent sibling interaction here! :)

    LuvEwan: :_| <<<---- 'Nuff said!

    rrk: Great Ben/Ben interaction! We don't see near enough of him :)

    koori: ?I am Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi, and I demand that you give me that towel!?
    :D Very nice indeed! :D
  23. Lady-Kenobi Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2003
    star 3
    EVERYONE'S STORIES ARE JUST GREAT!

    I will have my own story finished before the deadline.

    Just a little hint. the story features Jaina talking with her Granddaddy.
  24. leandrastar2000 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 6, 2004
    star 2
    Well, here is my little contribution to this challange. I hope everyone likes it. Please keep in mind that this is the first time I have attempted to write Mara and I don't know if it's very good. Any way, I gave it my best shot.

    Here ya go.

    _______________________________________________________

    Title: Look To the Future
    Author: Leandrastar2000
    Summary: Written for the Obi-Wan challenge. Your just gonna have to read it.
    Disclaimer: George Lucas owns it, I just play in his universe.


    Mara Jade stood on the roof of the Great Temple looking out at the vast jungle of Yavin IV. She and Luke had come here to check on things and to relax a little before returning to Corascant. In less than two weeks she would become Luke?s wife and things would change for her.

    Who was she kidding; things had already changed for her. She had gone from not really having anyone who truly cared about her, to having someone who cared about her enough to want her as his wife. This was a new concept for Mara and it would take some time to get used to.

    ?Luke?s love for you runs much deeper than you realize, Mara,? a gentle voice spoke from behind her.

    Mara swung around, her hand automatically going to the hilt of her lightsaber. Even as she turned she wondered why she had not sensed another?s presence. When she faced the voice fully, she understood why she hadn?t sensed him, for she faced the glowing blue form of a man who had already become one with the Force.

    The man who stood before her was in his mid thirties with redish-gold hair and a beard and blue green eyes that shone with determination. Mara was shocked to realize that she could very well be looking at the male version of herself and there was a familiarity about him that was unnerving to her.

    ?Who are you?? she asked softly and to her horror her voice trembled. There was just something about this man that made her feel vulnerable and that was not a feeling Mara Jade liked.

    ?You have no need to be frightened of me Mara Jade,? he said taking a step closer to her. ?I knew you while you were still growing inside your mother. I would do anything for you then, and I would do anything for you now. I have come to try and ease your some of your troubled thoughts.?

    ?Who are you?? Mara asked again, this time her voice was steady and her own determination was firmly back in place.

    The man before her chuckled, ?So much like your mother you are. Strong, determined, ready to take on the Universe if you have to. Since I know your mother would expect a direct and truthful answer, and since I am quite certain you are just like her, I will tell you who I am without any more delays. I, Mara Jade, am your father, but everyone else called me Obi-Wan Kenobi.?

    Mara couldn?t believe her ears. Was she hallucinating? Could she possible have lost her mind completely?
    Obi-Wan laughed again, ?No daughter, you are not hallucinating and you have not lost your mind. Look deep into your heart and you will know that what I say is true.?

    Mara reached out and searched her own feelings and the Force around her and as she delved deeper and deeper into those childhood memories that were only vague flashes, a face came into focus, the face of her father, the face of the man standing before her, the face of Obi-Wan Kenobi.

    ?Yes, it is true,? she whispered and let that brief but vivid memory of her father?s laughing face dominate her thoughts.

    ?That was a few days before you were taken from us. We thought we had found a place to hide, to keep you safe, but what we didn?t know was that there was a spy among us. A few days later, storm troopers found us and dragged you away while your mother and I fought with everything we had to get you back. For many years to come we tried to find you and get you back, but the Force had other plans for us all.?

    ?How old was I?? Mara asked taking a seat on the roof of the temple before her legs refused to hold her any more.

    ?You were four years old and a very bright star in a very dark night. Even then you
  25. Shaindl Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 18, 2002
    star 4
    Nice job, Leandra! I've always like the idea that Obi-Wan was Mara's father. Especially liked this line:

    You were four years old and a very bright star in a very dark night.

    Just one thing - 'Coruscant' is spelled with a 'u'. :)

    Shaindl
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