Beyond - Legends Of Love and Ewoks (Luke/Mara vignette, humor)

A/N: Set six months after Union. This is just a fairly weird scenario that popped into my head after reading a short story challenge on another site. Baklava to the first reader who catches all of the challenge points: something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, and an Ewok.


Standard disclaimer: Absolutely nothing is mine. Just playing.


~*~*~*~*~*~


His wife's outraged shriek, the Jedi Master reflected even as he winced, could probably be heard halfway around Yavin. So much for 'there is no emotion, there is peace'. How would he explain this lapse to the students?

"Luke Skywalker!" the still furious voice of his beloved demanded.

Luke sighed. "Coming, dear."

"Don't you give me that! How did this -- this thing get here?!"

"Mara," he began placatingly as he entered the common room of their quarters. "Mara, it's not a thing, it's an Ewok."

"I know what it is, Skywalker," Mara replied scathingly. "I also know the location of Endor relative to Yavin. You want to explain how an Ewok crossed the galaxy to appear in our apartment?"

"Would if I could," Luke answered. He sank into the nearest chair, and immediately wished he'd chosen another. The one he was now in was small, uncomfortable, and old; it was among the handful of nonessential equipment left behind when the Rebellion had rushed to leave the moon after the original Battle of Yavin so long ago. He'd found it when he first set up the Academy, and kept it for sentimental reasons, but that didn't mean he actually wanted to sit in it. The aforementioned Ewok waddled cheerfully over and tugged at his hand, chittering in his native dialect. Luke soothed him absently, more concerned with Mara's state of mind. He knew from vast personal experience that it was better to stay on the fiery redhead's good side. "Best guess is that he stowed away on a supply ship."

"Why in the name of the Force would he do that?" Mara's green eyes were practically shooting sparks. "And far more important, why is he here in our rooms?"

Luke tried hard not to cringe. Her previous reaction didn't bode well for the revelation of his next piece of news. "Because I volunteered the two of us to take him home."

"You WHAT?!!" Mara's earlier outburst paled in comparison. The Ewok dove for cover. Luke prepared himself to follow if necessary. "Do you know how long a trip that is? If you think I'm going to stay in a ship with that -- that -- that animated children's toy--"

Luke rose warily. "Love, it won't be that bad, really --"

A snap-hiss interrupted him, and the two Jedi turned in time to see a familiar blue blade sweep cleanly through the middle of their couch -- the only truly comfortable seating in the room. The clearly startled Ewok wielding the weapon dropped it with a clatter and stared wide-eyed at them. Luke and Mara returned the stare. Silence reigned.

"Won't be that bad," Mara mused softly. "Won't be that bad." She retrieved her lightsaber, retracting the blade as she did so. She turned to face Luke. An unearthly peace seemed to have descended upon her. The effect was even more chilling than the anger of a few minutes ago, and he involuntarily stepped backward. She fingered the saber hilt thoughtfully as she regarded him.

"Mara," Luke said hastily. "Sweetheart, it won't --" No, wait -- bad choice of words. Very bad. New approach needed. "I'll keep him out of your way, I promise. Think what a great test run it'll be for the Jade Sabre. "

Mara groaned aloud at the mention of her new ship. The Sabre was already as dear to her as the Jade's Fire had been, perhaps even more so. After all, Luke had designed it as a gift for her. Which, of course, only made the current prospect all the more terrible to contemplate.

"It'll get Ewok hair all over it!" she all but wailed.

Luke pulled his wife of six months into a comforting embrace. Mara Jade Skywalker was fierce, intimidating, and capable beyond words, but everyone had a weak point. Mara's was undoubtedl

 

that was hilarious!


You write them so well!


And I caught ever part of the challenge. Do I get a prize?

 

Howdy Gabri!

Great comedy short! And I got the items as well, though one took a little searching!

 

*gasping for breath*

That was marvelous, Gabri!

Really, dearest, I'd been having one of those terrible, horrible, no good very bad days until I got on the JC! I'm at school (skipping lunch is no big ) and I just had to stay on to see what this was.

Oh, and our convo inspired me the other night...talking about mush in TLC. Check it out.

-Emmi

 

Ok . . . . something old. . . The chair that Luke sat in

Something New . . .. the Jade's Saber

Something borrowed. . .

Something Blue. . . . Luke's Lightsaber

And an Ewok. . . . that's a given. . .


borrowed. . . that could refer to the ewok since they had to take it back, or to the blue lightsaber since it was originally Anakin's then Luke's.

Borrowed. . . borrowed. . . I'm at a loss. . .

 

borrowed time. toward the end of the story.

anyway, great stuff.

i've seen this challenge at fanfix.com, but haven't gotten to trying it yet.

 

Wonderful as always, Gabri! I got all five points, but it looks like the baklava has already been taken.

inez

 

He he he. Gabri continues to help me get over my phobia of L/M fics. Allthough I have yet to read one that she didn't write

 

Wonderful! Found through this your completed story. *goes to post on that, too*

Great job!

 

Bravo

Astro

 

Ooh, that was fun. And I caught all the points.

 

That was absolutely adorable.

~~Jilly

 

I see these little bunnies are nibbling away at you, too, Gabri!

Adorable! I know Mara would have my butt in a second if I said that to her face, but I know you don't mind.

And I love how Luke worried that too much cuteness would turn his wife to the Dark Side! LOL!!!

Excellent viggie!!!

 

HA! That was excellent! I love to read about the newly wed Skywalkers ^_^

EJ

 

Classic! Ewoks rule!

 

Hilarious! Never stop writing. You're great at it.

 

Jedi_Liz: *laughs* Well, you're supposed to tell me what they are! Silly Liz. But I'm sure you caught them. Here, have some yummy baklava. And thanks!

Rivad: Howdy, Rivad! [face_cheerful] Glad you liked it! And since you caught them all so quickly too (I saw that post before you edited it!), you can have baklava too.

Emmi: *groans* You're not supposed to skip lunch, Emmi! You need to eat! *sighs* But I have had similar days, where the food just isn't as important as the sanity. So pleased you liked it, dearest.

maramijade: Good job! I'm actually flattered you didn't catch the borrowed time right away -- that's exactly what I was going for. Thanks for reading!

zeekveerko: Excellent!

i've seen this challenge at fanfix.com, but haven't gotten to trying it yet.

That's the one. I'd have submitted it to fanfix already, but I'm still struggling with the formatting. Either my computer hates me, or I'm hopelessly technologically illiterate. They're equally possible. Glad you liked it, though!

Inez: Thank you so much, Inez! Here, have some baklava anyway.

crystalrain: Gabri continues to help me get over my phobia of L/M fics.

That's what I'm here for. Don't worry, you'll find more you like.

Oba: Thank you, O Queen of Vignettes!

Astro: Thanks!

RebelMom: Thank you, Mom! Here, you can have some baklava too. Oh, I give up. Baklava for everyone!

JainaDurron: Thank you, Jilly! Have some baklava.

LadyPadme: That particular bunny nipped a long time ago. I wanted to post it at fanfix first, since it was their challenge that inspired it; but as I mentioned, the formatting eludes me. I'll figure it out one of these days, and it'll be one of those ridiculously obvious things that makes you feel really stupid for not catching it earlier...

And I love how Luke worried that too much cuteness would turn his wife to the Dark Side! LOL!!!

*laughs* Well, if anything would turn Mara, I really think it'd be something like cute, fuzzy Ewoks that'd do it.

Eowyn_Jade: Thanks!

I love to read about the newly wed Skywalkers

Me too.

Daughter_of_Yubyub: They are pretty cute, aren't they? I especially liked the one that Artoo was chasing around.

Jedi-2B: That means a lot coming from an author as talented as yourself. Thank you very much!


Thanks for all the wonderful responses, everyone!

~Gabri

 

Why thank you Gabri!

Rivad pulls out dictionary and looks up baklava.

ba·kla·va (plural ba·kla·vas) noun

rich pastry: a dessert, originally from Turkey, made of paper-thin pastry brushed with butter, layered with nuts and baked, with syrup or honey poured over it after cooking.
[Mid-17th century. From Turkish.]

Oooo!!!! Yummie!! Thanks Gabri! Now I've learned something new for the day!

Yeah, I posted the answers, then realised others might want to figure it out on their own; so I decided not to ruin anyone else's fun, and I edited them out.

Keep up the good work!

Rivad looks around then slips a few more wild attack plot bunnies out of their cages to chase after Gabri...

Hehehe!

 

You're quite welcome, Rivad. Yes, baklava is extremely yummy. Another new fact for you: the paper-thin pastry used in baklava is called phyllo.

*glances around nervously* Do they have to be wild attack plot bunnies?

 

*Emmi throws up shield*

I've already loaned her some of my semi-tamed, cageable bunnies. I keep them locked up to play with in my spare time. Don't let the wild ones hurt her!

 

Thanks for the word Gabri!

Rivad writes phyllo in his book of new words.

I always try to learn something new every day, especially new words!

But Emmi the wild attack plot bunnies are guaranteed to produce lots of fine action, romance, and all around Luke/Mara goodness... at least that's what it said on the directions...

Rivad checks packaging on plot bunnies he released...

Oh dear! It seems that was only the first box! The second box was different! I've released Sonny and Cher plot bunnies to attack Gabri! NOOOOO!!!!

 

Emmi: *ducks behind shield and hugs Emmi* Thanks, dearest.

Rivad: Here's one of my favorite words for you: terpsichorean.

Oh, my stars....Luke and Mara meet Sonny and Cher. What an image... *shivers*

~Gabri

 

Freakin hilarious. I can just imagine how volatile Mara was in the first year of her and Luke's marriage.

 

That whole post was totally Mara! There are far too many good lines to quote, but all of Mara's dailogue was soo hilarious! This was a brilliant piece of work--sweet, funny, and NOT STUPID! (thank the Force) I hate stupid viggies that are supposed to be humour. *ahem* Anyway...wonderful!

 

ZaraValinor: *grins* Yes, I imagine Mara had her moments. Old habits die hard, right? Thanks!

Bellyup: Thank you so much! I'm so very glad it wasn't stupid. I do know what you mean there. I've read plenty of those myself. It's good to know that this one doesn't qualify.

~Gabri