*OFFICIAL THREAD* Crazy Episode III Theories!

"Gandolf the Grey"?

my crazy theory: darth sidious pulls back his hood 2 reveal kathy lee griffin! (or whatever)

ok ok ok that wasnt really MY OWN idea...

this...however...IS my own idea: dooku dies of old age & sidious gets a THIRD apprentice b4 vader: itz a GRL this time & she kills mace windu & padme...

 

This may sound insane but I remember hearing that Vader or Sidious got together a bunch of Jawas that were strong with the force to kill off all the Jedi? Did I just have a crazy dream or is this possible.

 

Here's a funny theory...what if Padme is actually in cohoots with Palpatine?? I know it's not plausible, but it would definately explain Anakin's fall to the darkside...

 

Leia says she remembers her mother as sad. Wouldn't you be sad if you had to go on springer to reveal that the father of your twins was infact. . . . .








JAR JAR BINKS!!!!!!!!!!!

What? it could be no worse than ewoks or jawas, or unwinding the luxurious lingerie of a tusken raider.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!! L8er

 

Ok, Padme is killed by Anakin for selling Luke to Owen and Beru because they couldn't have children. Anakin doesn't want a daughter so he tells Palpy and he says give her to the runner-up schmuck in the supreme chancellor give away(Bail antilles/organa, whatever). Good God, it's 3 AM. No wonder I have all these lousy ideas going under the crazy theory posts. L8er

 

Jawas started out as the lost 20. they got together and started a strange religious order called shrinkmedowntoshortysize. By the time they crossed the dune sea on tattooine, they were a whole 3 feet tall and had given up on their religion as it did no good to pray to Awcrapyoushrunkme for water in a freakin' dessert. L8er

 

This is going to be long, but I call it the "V" explanation.

Nute Gunrey (whatever) kidnaps Padme (with r2), who no one knows is pregs. Anakin wants to go after her, but the Jedi want caution. Nute sends a communication, saying they will release her if the senate releases some seperatists. Nute is not planning to release Padme. Anakin goes to Palpatine, and Palpatine gives him some ships and troops.
Obi-wan and some other Jedi go after clues to find Padme.
Nute finds out Padme is pregnant. He decides he wants her kids to use as hostiges after killing Padme, but does nto want to wait for normal gestation, so scientist give her some drugs that accelerate her pregnancy.
Obi-wan finds her, and she gave birth to Luke. They moved Luke into a seperate room. An alarm goes off, but Obi-Wan can't get Padme out. He gets a hold of Luke, and flies away. R-2 finally is able to help Padme. She has not given birth yet to Leia. She escapes to the nearest planet (and if Alderaan is the nearest planet, then great.)

Obi-Wan is afraid to take Luke to Corsucant, since he does not know who is really behind Padme's abduction, and does not want Luke to be abducted too. So he takes Luke to Tatooine, since he knows there are at least relatives that won't sell out Luke, and it is outside the republic.

Anakin gets info. that Padme is on the Nemodians (how ever it is spelt) homeworld. He has all these ships aiming weapons at the planet, asking for Padme. No one knows anything, so he is about to destroy cities and such. Whole bunch of Jedi turn up (Palpatine tips them off), and try to stop Anakin. Everyone believes that since Anakin is a Jedi, he won't destroy the cities or the Jedi in ships sitting between the planet and the Republic gun ships. But Anakin destroys the Jedi in their ships and the cities on the planet.
Obi-Wan wants to tell Anakin about his son but Owen won't let him, and when Padme landed on Alderaan, she was taken in by Bail, who told her to wait, not to go to Anakin.

The growth drugs Padme was given made her kids grow fast, so in a few days time, the kids are a year old. Anakin would not believe they are his kids since they are too old. So before the end of the movie, Leia is almost 2 years old, so she can remember her mom....


(I call it teh "V" theory, cause you remember the minseries, and Robin (whatever her name was) gave birth to two alien hybrid kids, and on grew up exponentially?)

 

The whole "Handmaiden-Decoy" trick totally backfires:

1. Anakin accidentally sleeps with Dorme, thinking she's Padme.

2. Dorme becomes pregnant and gives birth to Luke and Leia. Dorme, quite the weepy one (as seen in AOTC), is who Leia remembers as being sad.

3. Padme, realizing what has happened, cannot bear the situation and dies.

4. Anakin, grieving over Padme's death, then kills Dorme in a fit of rage, thus turning to the Dark Side.

 

What if Anakin's injuries are from falling in the Sarlacc instead of lava like everyone seems to think?

It's so crazy it just might work.

 

Well if were getting crazy...

R2D2 is Darth sifo dias' uncle sisters brothers cousins long lost neices driod. Therefore Palp = bane = maul(2) + Anikins clone divided by the Padme principal (Padme = mace's hoe) multiplied by Yoda does not see the darkside = R2 is a human that looks like droid and his clone is Vader and thats why Anikin eats mashed potatos with Jar Jar!

 

Some nice crazy ideas

 

How about this crazy theroy........R2-D2 is really the chosen one....think about it he has saved somebodys life in every movie...heck if he hadn't got the sheild back up on the starcruiser when everybody was leving naboo theyed all be dead..and star wars would have ended. I can just hear it ....

Mace:we were wrong it wasn't Anakin

OB1:Than who?

Mace: it was R2-D2 all a long

OB1: yeah I knew

Anakin:NOOOO!

R2-D2:beeb blob boop beed beeb (traslation:I am the chosen one worship me ha ha ha!

Palpatine: Lets go R2 and rule the universe

 

AJP,
Let me just say that you are one sick, twisted individual. I like that in a lunatic

 

Yes I am a lunatic......R2-D2 FOREVER!!!!

 

In the coruscant bar scene, when Obi-Wan chops off Zam's hand, there is a 'woman' standing next to Ahmed Best and she GRINNING like a crazy evil sith lord.
It is no doubt everything in this movie is being manipulated by 'h'er'.

George Lucas is using the old "make everyone think the bad guy is a male" but then the bad guy turns out to be a 'hot chick'.

But don't don't be fooled by appearances.

Master Sifo-Dyas wasn't killed, he had a sex change, and hangs out in the clubs on coruscant...

That's all there is to it.

 

Sidius comes and suddenly open his cloak. Anakin shocks and he tells anakin "i am your father, son, join me and we can rule the galaxy as father and son."

 

Padme and Anakin go for a night out in the coruscant entertainment district. There Padme buys some deathsticks and gives them to anakin. When they start using the deathsticks they halusinate the whole original trilogy and wake up in a new unreliased version of RotJ.

 

The only reason Padme gets pregnant with Luke and Leia is because someone sabotaged the birth control device she and Anakin were using...
And that someone would have to be... Yoda, because he could foresee that only Anakin's offspring could eventually turn him back to the good side of the force...

 

TINA, LOL that is too funny.

Anyways here is my crazy idea.

Lucas has totally tricked the fan base.
Palpatine and Sidious are actually two separate people. Even more shocking they don't even know each other.

This is how it goes Anakin kills both Nute Gunray and Dooku killing the 2 people who even know he exists. Sidious kidnaps Palps, lets Obi know first then tells Anikin to come later. This is what happens Sidious allows himself to be killed by Obi and Yoda. Then does a life force transfer into Palps, then in walks Anakin just as Obi wants to kill the now sith controlled Palps.

Obi "Out of my way Anakin so i can kill the Sith"

Anakin "You'll have to come through me first"

Obi "Don't be dumb"
Anakin "NO you don't be dumb, you want to kill the Chancellor"

Palps "Save me Anakin, the Jedi are evil and want to kill me."

Big fight, you know the rest.

 

This one is out there, but I came up with the idea after reading the "behind the scenes" info on Lando in the OS database.

"Lando was still the product of cloning, part of the Ashandi family who reproduced through such means."

Now I'm pretty much a Star Wars "canon" guy. (The only true info in Star Wars has to come the movies and from GL personally.) This quote is referring to original drafts of the ESB script. So it's something Lucas himself wrote. And the only reason I even considered the possibility was because Lucas likes to reuse his own ideas.

If this is true, then maybe we could see Lando in Ep.III.

For the entire thing, clickhere

I don't necessarily believe we'll see him. I was just curious to get your thoughts on the possibility or lack thereof.

 

Listen, I went through this whole wonderfully hilarious thread and all of you are wrong the true theory is that...

are you ready for this.....

Mace Windu is really Anakin's father. yes, its true. you see..Mace goes to tatooine on a peace keeping mission. he meets Shmi and feel sorry for the poor girl that shes a slave to the hutts. he comforts her but not before he is seized by the "power of the force"

Shmi and Mace does the wild thing and conceives Anakin. He didnt think nothing was wrong until Shmi told him that shes pregnant. Mace then realizes that he commited the ultimate Jedi sin so he goes back to Coruscant. Now heres the twist...

get ready...this one will blow your mind..

he knew that they would revolked his master's title if they ever find out so he gives Shmi the Jedi Mind Trick to make her think that she conceived the boy herself. that way no one would be the wiser. I mean shes a slave, who would believe her.

Why do you think Mace didnt want Anakin to be trained in the first place ? ah ha ! thats right cause he knew ( hahahaha ) Anakin was his kid. dont want the eveidence of Mace's pimpin ways in front of him.

so this sets up the ep 3 confrontation between Mace and Anakin in which Ani kills his own father ( sweeeeeeet )

for an even deeper twist, during TPM while Qui-Gon was walking aroung the city with jar-Jar and the Queen. Obi- Wan sneaks away from the ship to get some grub. he meets Shmi at the market. Obi Wan feels sorry for the girl cause she is a slave. He comforts her but not before he is seized by the "power of the force"

Obi-wan and Shmi does the wild thing and they conceived....yep, you guessed it " Owen Lars " Obi never new that Owen was his son, but Shmi told Owan that Obi-wan was his father. It gets deeper than that folks ( hahaha you see, Shmi didnt want to be blatant by naming the child Obi-Wan Kenobi Jr. so she made up a name that would sound simular to his.

O.W.E.N ( which is actually
Obi-Wen Kenobi. she just took out the BI , kept the W and then substiuted the A for and E...trying to be slick and then just make up a phony last name like we wouldnt be able to pick that up hahahaha )

Anyway,Owen always hated Obi-wan cause he was an dead beat dad. thats why he told Luke that
"he was a crazy old man" and that "hes dead, he died about the same time as your father."
See, folks..everything connects. In fact...Obi-Wan Kenobi is really Anakin's step-father..."from a certain point of view."
And that my friend is how things really went down

Whew ! ( I told you Lucus wont be able to outsmart me )

 

I've got th craziest theory ever! that anything in this entire forum will come true because we no so little about what will happen yet

(oh and Padme=Mon Mothma=Jar Jar=Bass Nass=Jabba=Rikishi from WWF=Death Star=Nute Gunray's hat you know it makes sense

 

How about posting theories that are a little different versus straight-out spam? Thanks.

 

Okay we know Anakin can't fight his record throughout the series 2-3 and one of those victories was a gimme and the other was against a barely trained padawan that could have killed him save for a lightsaber proof suit (Thanks for that GL) so I propose that Palpatine and Dooku purge the Jedi and Anakin being a lucky something or another trips as Dooku prepares to finish him and Dooku impales himself on Ani's blade. Palpatine then converts Ani and Obi kicks his butt bringing Ani's overall record to 3-4
Ani then albeit clumsily manages to help keep the galaxy in line hence why he answered to Tarkin in ANH but only to Palpy in ESB and ROTJ.