*OFFICIAL THREAD* PT/Episode III Humor Thread

Discussion in 'Prequel Trilogy' started by ST-TPM-ASF-TNE, Dec 24, 2001.

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  1. Lord_Kosh Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 20, 2005
    star 2
    ...this could be continued almost as long as the pants joke....

    Emperor:
    By now, you must know that your chicken can never be turned.

    Obi-wan:
    These aren't the chickens you're looking for.

    Stormtrooper:
    These aren't the chickens we're looking for.

    Yoda:
    When gone am I, the last of the chicken will you be.

    Vader:
    You don't know the power of the Dark Meat.

    3PO (to R2):
    ...You overweight bucket of chicken...

    3PO:
    I say, over there! Were you looking for chicken?

    Vader:
    You are part of the rebel alliance and a chicken...Take her away.
  2. MonkeytheJedi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 21, 2005
    star 2
    The top 10 reasons why Star Wars is better than Star Trek!!

    10: "Look sir, droids!"
    9: No time travellers picking up their own heads
    8: No alternate universes!
    7: No transporters to save your butt at the last minute!
    6: Aliens with makeup somewhere besides their foreheads!
    5: Starship battles in three dimensions!
    4: No neutral zones, all war!
    3: No ultra-powerful aliens with one-letter names!
    2: No holodecks for lame plot ideas invented by actors!
    The # 1 Reason why Star Wars is Better than Star Trek:

    Leia in the skimpy outfit in Jabba's Palace!!

    Baa Baa Imperial Sheep: http://frontsteps.com/movies/baa_baa_imperial_sheep/

    Yoda Parody of ?Hey Ya? by Outkast: http://download.theforce.net/humor/music/mp3s/ithorian-yoda.mp3

  3. LordMajinn Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 19, 2004
    star 1
    Sidious: "Commander Bly, the time has come. Execute Order 66!

    Commander Bly: "Yes sir!"

    Clone Trooper: "It's a shame we have to kill all of these poor innocent Jedi. *Blows nose in a tissue*

    Clone Trooper 2: "Oh well, if we're going to do this thing, we're going to do it right!

    Commander Bly: " Alright then troops, THEME MUSIC!!

    *A clone trooper pops in a CD by QUEEN and plays "Another one Bites the Dust."

    Commander Bly: " That's what I'm talking about!"
  4. TheReturnofKardarl Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2006
    Picture the characters of Star Wars taking a trip to McDonalds.....

    Vader eating his meal:
    "Indeed you are extra crispy as the Emperor has forseen"
    Old Ben giving his order at the counter:
    "Two legs, a thigh, a wing... and no questions asked"
    Vader at the counter:
    "I'm altering my meal, pray I don't alter it any furthur"
    Sidious telling Vader what to order at the window:
    "Do what must be done, do not super size, show no mercy!"
    Vader helping out a new employee behind the counter:
    "I see you have constructed a new kids meal box, your training is now complete"
    Vader still having trouble at the counter:
    "If you don't take my order, than perhaps she will"
    Han Solo and Old Ben arguing over what to order:
    "I call it duck." "In this place there's no such thing as duck"
    Tarkin having a hard time controlling his people at the table:
    "Enough! This bickering is pointless. Vader, release him and give him back the kids meal toy" "As you wish"
    Sidious and Vader sit on the bench together staring at Ronald McDonald:
    "If he could be turned....he could become a powerful ally"
    "Yeeesssss....he could be a great asset" "Can it be done?"
    "He will join us...or die"

    If someone made this a fan film i would die laughing...




  5. TheReturnofKardarl Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2006
    Boba Fett is handed his Big Mac at the counter, looks down at it, and looks back to the employee:
    "Well?...did it survive?" "It's no good to me if it isn't alive"
    Meanwhile, the girl behind counter is at the end of her wits arguing with Vader who still hasn't managed to give his order yet....
    Girl: "Sir, I don't have to take this...."
    Vader leans over the counter: "Perhaps you think you are being treated unfairly?"
    Luke talks to Han as they sit to eat:
    "I used to eat here you know..."
    Han tastes the food and looks back at Luke:
    "Your gonna die here you know"

  6. TheReturnofKardarl Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2006
    Other possible lines:

    "This resturant is the ultimate franchise in the universe!"

    Yoda coaching the new girl who can't figure out the register:
    "Try not. Do or do not. There is no try"

    Leia:"I'd rather kiss a clown"
    Solo:"I can arrange that!"
    Leia:"Will someone get this big dumb purple thing out of my way?"
    Solo:"No meal is worth this!"
    Solo:"I don't know Chewie..... eat casual, but don't make it look like your trying to eat casual"
    Vader after finishing his meal:
    "I sense something...something I have not felt sense..."(Barfs under his helmet)



  7. Obi-Wan-1000 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 11, 2005
    star 4
    That one was funny[face_laugh] [face_laugh]






  8. MonkeytheJedi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 21, 2005
    star 2
    yea that is funny
  9. DARTHKANISS Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 8, 2004
    star 1
    God such humor and amusement in this thread its tantilising my interlect.

    Cheers.
  10. MonkeytheJedi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 21, 2005
    star 2
    [image=http://www.public.iastate.edu/~jdkalb/meesahate.jpg]

    [image=http://www.creaturecantina.com/news_images/2005/0720/gg3.JPG]

    [image=http://media.gamespy.com/columns/image/July03_oldrepublic_2.jpg]

  11. Lord_Kosh Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 20, 2005
    star 2
    Love the pictures...especially the one with Jar Jar Binks getting punched out. If only we had a picture of Tyson biting off his ear...with a quote "tastes like chicken..."
  12. TheReturnofKardarl Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2006
    For those who haven't seen it, go to Compfused.com and check out the lost Star Wars scene. It is hilarious! When the new laptop gets here, I'll be making similiar funny star wars clips.
  13. Darth_Culler Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Oct 9, 2005
    You know you're a redneck Jedi when you hear...
    "Billy Bob Joe, I am your father... And your uncle!!!!"
  14. Lord_Kosh Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 20, 2005
    star 2
    Redneck Jedi names:

    Qui-Gon Jimmy
    Obi-Bob Kenobilly
    Aayla-Beth Secura
    Barriss-Sue Offee
    Bastila-Jane Shan
    Yodaddy


    Any others???
  15. MonkeytheJedi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 21, 2005
    star 2
    [image=http://home.att.net/~jcshetler/insideship.jpg]

    Master! I can't believe you're breaking into our bathroom!

    Oh! Was it wrong of me? Did I catch you at the wrong time?

  16. RebelScum77 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2003
    star 6
  17. FettPredator Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Feb 20, 2006
    "21 Reasons Why Star Wars Is Better Than Titanic"

    1. The Titanic is big, but it doesn't have hyperdrive.

    2. Yoda could use the Force to lift Titanic out of the water.

    3. Leia is a princess, a senator, a freedom fighter, and Jedi material; Rose is just marriage bait.

    4. Ewoks throw better parties than either first class or steerage.

    5. When flying towards the Titanic, Wedge can't say, "Look at the size of that thing!" and really mean it.

    6. It would be much scarier to get chased around the boat by a raving madman with a lightsaber as opposed to a handgun.

    7. Titanic is egalitarian by portraying poor people as sympathetic characters. Star Wars is egalitarian by promoting bug-eyed amphibians to Admiral.

    8. Said bug-eyed amphibious Admiral manages NOT to lose his ship.

    9. We know Cal is the bad guy because he sneers at the poor and treats his fiancee like property. We know Darth Vader is the bad guy because he strangles people and blows up planets for fun.

    10. Yeah, Leo can dance, but can he fly an X-wing?

    11. Rose braves icy water to rescue her man. Leia braves Jabba the Hutt.

    12. There are always enough escape pods in Star Wars.

    13. Do you know what the Empire does to self-proclaimed "kings of the world?"

    14. If Luke were handcuffed to a pipe below decks in a sinking ship, he would use the Force to get the key.

    15. Nothing has the same sting as "I'd rather kiss a Wookie."

    16. Han is frozen in carbonite and turned into a wall ornament. Leo simply freezes.

    17. Han Solo would've steered clear of that stinkin' iceberg!

    18. We knew the boat was gonna sink. But who could've anticipated, "Luke....I am your father."?

    19. Stormtroopers blast big holes in stupid minor characters; everyone in Titanic was a stupid minor character.

    20. When Star Wars was proclaimed coolest movie of all time by half of planet earth, George Lucas did not make a dork of himself at the Oscars.

    21. Titanic morals: a. gamble, b. cheat on your husband, c. pose nude for pictures, d. premarital sex is OK if you're infatuated.

    Star Wars morals: a. fight evil, b. do good, c. respect all life even if it's ugly and slithers, d. rescue princess, e. save planet.
  18. FettPredator Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Feb 20, 2006
    and luke Skywalker isn't obsessed with sleeping with every alien he encounters[face_dancing]
  19. lightthunder1 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 11, 2005
    star 1
    here is a humor

    [image=http://www.signmediainternational.com/images/BURGER%20KING.jpg]

    it is your first day working here

    [image=http://www.funnypart.com/pictures/FunnyPart-com-yoda.jpg]

    thanks drunk man

    [image=http://www.acaciahsrealm.com/images/anakin_happy_sm.jpg]


    oh no it is over burning

    your fired
    no
    [image=http://www.stardestroyer.net/ROTS/Vader-2.jpg]



    [image=http://www.roger-one.net/pix/wallpaper/Checa/anakin.jpg]

    noooooooooooooooooooooo

    good by my
  20. DarkJediKriss Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Dec 28, 2005
    I made this one and thought I might share it. Click on it make it bigger. LOL!
    [image=http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f237/DarkJediKriss/anisbunnyears.jpg]
  21. lightthunder1 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 11, 2005
    star 1
  22. jedi_master_gon Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Feb 21, 2006
    SPOILER INTERVIEW FOR STARWARS EPISODE III:

    So George, tell us, who exactly is this "Darth Sidious"?
    GL: Darth Sidious is actually Yoda. This plothole will be explained in Episode XXXVI: Attack of the Revenge of the Phantom Hope Striking Back Returning of the Menace.

    uh huh, i see. how will Darth Sidious [yoda] be revealed?
    GL: Obi-wan will go into the Jedi's bathroom stall and walk in on Yoda putting on his robes.

    Do we get to see Qui-Gon as a ghost?
    GL: no. Qui-gon has been killed twice: in his mortal form and his also mortal-force-ghost-form by the force-ghost of Darth Maul. This will also be explained in Episode XXXVI: Attack of the Revenge of the Phantom Hope Striking Back Returning of the Menace.

    Do Obi-wan and Anakin have a "thing" going on?
    GL: Not in Episode III. But in Episode XXXVI: Attack of the Revenge of the Phantom Hope Striking Back Returning of the Menace, they will be in a relationship together as force-ghosts.

    Who will Yoda fight?
    GL: EVERYONE. He will fight both Darth Sidious and Vader, and every single clonetrooper in the Republic army. SUPRISINGLY, he does not manage to defeat them all. He DOES however defeat all the clonetroopers that have the ability to aim accurately and kill major characters. Darth Vader and Sidious survive as well as Yoda. Yoda's ability to defeat all the clonetroopers, will be explained in Episode XXXVI: Attack of the Revenge of the Phantom Hope Striking Back Returning of the Menace.

    Explain in detail one of the fight scenes.
    GL: Anakin will fight against Aayala Secura, Ki-Adi-Mundi, Mace Windu, Yoda, Obi-Wan, Shaak Ti, and the jedi on the council with the really really really long neck. We never gave him a name. Well Anakin against six jedi isn't fair, so he will bring the entire Republic Army of clones. Anakin and his clones defeats all of them except for Aayala Secura, and they make her dance by shooting at her feet. When they finally kill her she does a really phony looking fall. Why Obi-Wan and Yoda are alive in the OT will be explained in Episode XXXVI: Attack of the Revenge of the Phantom Hope Striking Back Returning of the Menace.

    Who is the father of Luke and Leia: Anakin or Obi-Wan?
    GL: Neither. Yoda is. That's why Luke and Leia look nothing alike, and at sometimes Luke looks a little like a goblin.

    How will Mace be killed-off?
    GL: He doesn't. He appears to be struck horribly by Darth Sidious's/Yoda's lightning and thrown out the window, but if you pause the screen RIGHT before he is struck by lightning, it's really Jar Jar Binks. It only looks like Mace Windu because the lightning deformed him. Mace will come back and explain his escape in Episode VII: The Empire's Revenge of the Jedi Menace Hoping of the Clones.

    Please comment on my first humor post!
  23. DarkJediKriss Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Dec 28, 2005
  24. mjp Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 21, 2004
    star 1
    Yep, good start. Keep 'em coming!
  25. jedi_master_gon Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Feb 21, 2006
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