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Old Rogues go Rogue: Latest Update: Wes' Sister Comes to Visit

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Kettch_the_Jedi, Jan 16, 2003.

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  1. Kettch_the_Jedi

    Kettch_the_Jedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Nov 22, 2002
    First of all, I am sorry, so sorry that it has been so long since the last post. I promise never to take that long again. In fact, I promise to post at the minimum once a month, by the 15th of every month. In addition, as part of my apology, this next post should be quite long. I hope you like it. Oh, and since it has been so long, I reposted in green the last part that had Hobbie in it. The new post starts after the green one. The new post should be especially amusing for anyone who knows one of those absent-minded people. :)

    Part 7

    The next day Hobbie walked into the hanger with an expression that was exceptionally mournful, even for him. Either way I am doomed. Two days ago I was on time and was reprimanded for not putting forth much effort and enthusiasm. Yesterday I was early and Captain Bad-Mood had me scrape oil stains off of the floor. It reminds me of the saying that spread after the second death star?s destruction: Sticks and stones may break stormtrooper bones but Ewok parties will knock out the victorious Rebels.

    ?Hobbie!? Dirke called across the hanger, ?Look, we got a new ship.?

    The doleful pilot glanced in the direction that Dirke was pointing but all he could see was a large lump of metal, nothing even vaguely resembling a ship. ?Where?? He asked.

    ?There,? Dirke once again pointed to the slightly conical structure. ?The Vong have ships like rocks so our engineers built a ship like a mountain to prove we are bigger and stronger.?

    I cannot believe he can say those words ?our engineers? without shuddering, Hobbie thought. Out loud he asked, ?How does it compare with the other fighters??

    ?And they are really bozo because you enter the ship from the top of the cone,? Dirke said enthusiastically.

    ?Are they faster or more maneuverable than the X-wings?? Hobbie persisted.

    ?Well, no,? Dirke replied hesitantly.

    ?Better shields??

    ?Than an LL-wing,? Dirke responded.

    ?An umbrella is more protection than what the LL-wing has. What is their advantage over an X-wing or A-wing??

    ?They do take off faster.?

    ?Newer does not necessarily mean better,? Captain Bren entered the hanger. ?Our engineers are very creative but not very practical. However, we are required to try everything they create until the ship is destroyed or we decide we want them to produce more.?

    She can say ?our engineers? without shuddering also. Maybe they do not know that they are supposed to be shuddering. Maybe I will do it for them. ?Ever think about shooting some of your engineers?? Hobbie asked, shuddering as he said the word ?engineers.?

    ?I will pretend I did not hear that,? Captain Bren replied. ?On another note, I am glad you showed some initiative in getting here early, however, it would be preferable if you did something worthwhile with your time instead of standing around talking.?

    ?I could not find any more oil stains,? Hobbie quickly responded.

    Captain Bren looked around the hanger. ?I see plenty.?

    ?Oh,? Hobbie added. ?Well, I meant to say I could not find any stains that weren?t under a ship. Why clean those up when they will just reappear the next time we land??

    ?I pity all your prior commanding officers,? Bren sighed.

    The rest of the squadron entered the hanger so Bren continued, ?Coora, you get the Mountain-ship. Everyone else, go to your regular ships. Today we are practicing a search and destroy mission. White Sands Squadron is hiding somewhere in nearby space and our job is to find and engage them.?

    Coora--who was always the last person in the squadron to take off and land due to an incident that no one would tell Hobbie about--climbed into his new ship and began to familiarize himself with the controls.

    The entire squadron, minus Coora, started their ships and took off to fly around the hanger.

    ?How does that thing take off?? someone asked over the comm..

    ?Just clear the area,? the captain commanded.

    All of a sudden Coora?s ship shot out of the
  2. Daughter_of_Yubyub

    Daughter_of_Yubyub Jedi Master star 6

    Jul 8, 2002
    [face_laugh] Well worth the wait! Poor Hobbie!

    [hl=pink]YubYub and TG- Protecting fangirls from hormonally gifted fanboys since 2002[/hl]
  3. Jedi Master Greg

    Jedi Master Greg Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jun 1, 1999
    more more more!!!
    lol!! Hopefully someone ONCE told Hobbie that "some girls just aren't worth it."
  4. Agent_Jaid

    Agent_Jaid Jedi Master star 5

    Feb 21, 2003

    That's just saaaaaaad... :p

    I loved the post with Wedge though!! [face_love] :D [face_laugh] [face_laugh]

    When Myri said she was going to marry him...... [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]

  5. pengwin_jibberish

    pengwin_jibberish Jedi Youngling star 2

    Jul 3, 2002
    *Wipes tears from eyes*
    I"m laughing too hard right now to form coherent sentances.
  6. Kettch_the_Jedi

    Kettch_the_Jedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Nov 22, 2002
    Thanks. :)

    Jedi Master Greg
    Glad you liked it. I'm in the process of writing the next part (with Wes and what his squadron does with the paint). And, we'll see if this girl is worth Hobbie's time... :)

  7. Jaina_and_Jag

    Jaina_and_Jag Jedi Master star 5

    Apr 19, 2003
    Hey! :) I'll read it in a bit, kinda busy right now.

  8. JadeSolo

    JadeSolo Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Sep 20, 2002
    HAHAHA!!! [face_laugh] Let's see, what part did I like the best? Hobbie screwing with that scientist's mind, I think--TOO FUNNY!! That, and Wedge's decision between his two orange flightsuits [face_laugh]

    Good thing I'm not eating anything right now. It would be all over my keyboard :p

    That scientist reminds me of someone...who...who...whaaaaa....wait, what was the question?
  9. CptCorranHorn

    CptCorranHorn Jedi Master star 5

    Oct 16, 2002

    that was awesome

    poor Hobbie lol

    and the women advice from Hobbie's fellow pilots was dead on [face_laugh]
  10. Sahiri

    Sahiri Jedi Youngling star 3

    May 27, 2002
    Wow, it has been awhile. Thanks for the heads up. Great post. Anything with Hobbie in it is always grand ol' fun.

  11. Jedi_jainafel

    Jedi_jainafel Jedi Padawan star 4

    Aug 5, 2002
    *Falls down laughing*

    *Wipes away tears*

    That..was SO good!!!I was laughing so hard, the entire post!!!

    Good to have ya back and posting Kettch_The_Jedi!!!

  12. Phoenix_Reborn

    Phoenix_Reborn Jedi Master star 4

    Feb 23, 2003
    Poor Hobbs!

    I missed this fic! I'm glad to see it updated, but if I was the Hobster I would leave that planet never to return's detremental to a pilots' survival rate...
  13. talkingbanana

    talkingbanana Jedi Master star 3

    Jun 4, 2003
    YES!!! You FINALLY updated! Thanks for the PM tellin' me, by the way. I appreciate that.

    Hilarious as always, keep up the good work and UPDATE MORE OFTEN!

    SECRETSISTER Jedi Master star 8

    Nov 18, 2001
    OMG!!! Mountain shaped ships! Ewok vases! Myri marrying Wes?!? [face_laugh]

    And poor, poor, Hobbie. How does he do it? I've never seen so much bad luck embodied in one person!!!!

    Wes's pilots are a hoot! I think he needs to open a Child Care Center or something!!

    Keep going! Keep going! [face_laugh] :eek: [face_laugh]
  15. neila_nuruodo

    neila_nuruodo Jedi Master star 4

    Aug 3, 2002

    *catches breath*

    [face_laugh] That was hilarious!! I loved Hobbie playing with that scientist's mind... and the Hard Luck Cafe...LOL!! Post more soon! :D
  16. I love Sci Fi

    I love Sci Fi Jedi Master star 4

    Jan 21, 2000
    lol :)) poor guy he just can't get anything right
  17. Spike2002

    Spike2002 Former FF-UK RSA and Arena Manager star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Feb 4, 2002
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]
    I'm so glad I finally got around to checking out your updates. That last one was hilarious.
  18. talkingbanana

    talkingbanana Jedi Master star 3

    Jun 4, 2003
    It's almost the 15th . . . here's a please-update-soon UP!
  19. Rogue...Jedi

    Rogue...Jedi Administrator Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jan 12, 2000
    [face_laugh] this is hilarious!!!

    Keep it up!
  20. Kettch_the_Jedi

    Kettch_the_Jedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Nov 22, 2002
    Glad you liked the Myri part. :)

    lol! and I feel proud that I made you cry with laughter. :)

    I liked the flight suit part also. :) And I think scientists (spacey ones) are really fun to write.

    :) more advise coming (next post with Hobbie)

    Glad you liked Hobbie.

    Thanks. I feel as if I have acheived something good when I cause a reader to enjoy the entire post (with laughter). :)

    :) Detrimental for sure.

    Glad you liked it. :) I am pretty sure I'll get the update posted tonight. I am pleased that you are looking forward to it.

    Child Care Center... hmmm... it could be arranged. :) And, yeah, poor Hobbie but I see a change of luck in his future... sort of.

    Yeah, playing with the scientist's mind is definitely fun to write. :) Glad you liked the Hard Luck Cafe also. I have something planned that may make him wish he had maybe... well, I don't want to give away any hints. :)

    I love Sci Fi
    He does have strikes against him, listening to the other pilot's advice. :)

    Glad you liked it. :)

    Greetings! I am happy that you are amused with the story. :)

  21. Rogue...Jedi

    Rogue...Jedi Administrator Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jan 12, 2000
    *coughs* I notice the one post you didnt respond to, which I will now update and say it is the 15th. :D :)
  22. Jaina_and_Jag

    Jaina_and_Jag Jedi Master star 5

    Apr 19, 2003
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] Great post! :D

  23. Kettch_the_Jedi

    Kettch_the_Jedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Nov 22, 2002
    :) I know, I know. :) I have a post ready but I'm not too happy with it. I think I misplaced my humor and can't get the next post correct but I need to post it tonight. AAAcck!

    Thanks; glad you liked it. :)
  24. Kettch_the_Jedi

    Kettch_the_Jedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Nov 22, 2002
    I know it is short and I do not think I am yet happy with this latest post, but I wanted to make sure that it was up on the fifteenth so here it is. I will try and add more before the end of the month (but no promises). :)

    Also note that Wes' background is being supplied by Daughter of Yubyub's story [link=]The Life of Wes Janson[/link].

    Lastly, since there is a month between posts (usually) and I alter between characters I decided to add a summary to refresh your memories (in case you do not want to re-look up the last posts). Enjoy!

    Summary: Two posts prior, Wes arrived on his second day with his new squadron to find them all dressed as famous new republic and imperial personas (except Swroe, the mostly-def pilot). His lone female pilot, Drea, dressed as an ersatz Princess Leia complete with tasty cinnarolls attached to her head. Wes had his new pilots perform a simple flying exercise in which they try to avoid being shot down by him. His pilots, however, used their solid green ships to camouflage with the grass and hide. Exasperated, Captain Wes ?convinced? the supply officer to give him a cartload of cans containing the most hideous, bright yellow paint he had.

    Part 11

    Two hours after finally approving his pilots? paint jobs, Captain Wes Janson sat at his new desk filling out what seemed to be forms requiring information that no one should need to know. Take, for example, question number 54 on form eight which was required for any exercise using ships in the air: did any pilot experience any itches on their persona while flying one of the government?s ships, and if so, where was the itch located?

    Wes sighed, reminding himself that at least the ships were all properly painted a color so blaring they were probably contributing to his slightly massive headache; there was no way anyone could hide in these ships. Of course, it had taken two tries before the ships were painted as he wanted them, but with this group that seemed almost a miracle. The first time Wes had checked on his pilots to see their progress he had been both dismayed and impressed with how his pilots had responded to his order ?cover you entire ship with this paint.?

    First, he had checked on Afba, who had interpreted his order as ?stripe your entire ship with this paint.? Bright yellow stripes across the entire length of a normal Y-wing would have been bad enough but Afba had not gotten rid of the original green paint. The green and yellow stripes created a combination that was physically painful to the eyes (and a good reminder that Hobbie?s lifeday was coming up soon).

    Secondly, Wes had observed Drea?s paint job. Not being extremely patient, Drea had decided to hook up the paint to a supervac and reverse the power flow. Most of the ship did get painted; however, so did everything else within a large radius of Drea?s ship. Wes? intention of making the ships impossible to hide was voided in that particular area of the hanger but as a positive side effect Dria would never have to worry about someone stealing her ship?even smugglers had standards. Dria swore that she could find the Y-wing easily by moving her head around until she could determine the outlines of the ship but Wes figured that if he ever needed to get in her Y-wing he would have to stumble around in that scary world of eye-hurting yellow until he physically ran into it.

    Next?after procuring a set of dark sunglasses in case any of his other pilots were as impatient as his female pilot?Wes checked out Pilla?s artwork. Out of all the pilots, Wes had admired the questioning pilot?s job the best. Pilla had covered his entire ship with large smiley faces. Large Yellow smiley faces. ?I do not want to see any green on the ship,? Wes had clarified, to which Pilla had responded, ?Can I glue purple teddy bears on the green spots?? Trying not to be envious of Pilla?s creativity as well as trying to remember the idea for future use, Wes had kept
  25. Kettch_the_Jedi

    Kettch_the_Jedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Nov 22, 2002
    OOps! I forgot to change the subject line...

    :) Old age and all that.
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