Lit Books Comics A/V One Sentence or Less -- ANDOR (SEASON 1)

A Jedi from the past travels through time to fight a Sith from the past, where he meets a Jedi from now who's going to a creepy moon, they look at each other, say, "Well, that's certainly interesting," and then separately continue along their respective plots like nothing ever happened, completely invalidating the entire point of a time-travel story.

 

Stuck in traffic for way too long.

 

Magical Dark Side crystals travel through time and make everyone vomit; meanwhile, Jaden Korr is upset.

 

The book where Kyle Katarn's apprentice grows his own facial hair and tries to show that he can whoop Sith and darksiders just as well as his master Kyle Katarn, but sadly without an appearance by Kyle Katarn himself this proves impossible to substantiate and we continue to hope that Kyle Katarn will appear in the still unannounced conclusion to the trilogy to prove to his apprentice that there can be only one Kyle Katarn.

 

The crystal from Splinter of the Mind's Eye has a bunch of buddies.

 

Havac and Parnesius are tied at 7! Oh, sweet drama!

 

He's not a Kel Dor.

 

Havac inches it out, thereby proving that poetry is for losers.

 

A book about all the characters you know and love from Tales of the Bounty Hunters, except none of them act like they did in TOTBH, plus there's a space spider selling information from the middle if his space web in the galaxy's most literally incarnated metaphor.

 

If you haven't heard how freaking awesome Boba Fett is by now, just wait for every single character in the Bounty Hunter trilogy to fill you in.

 

Bounty Hunters galore, but not a one of them is recognizable from the way they acted in previous novels...an ultimately boring tale in an effort to cash in on fans love of the bounty hunters.

 

One of the prime sources of maximalism in the EU, by characterizing turbolasers as having multi-gigaton recoil energies that would rip the ships apart if they weren't properly braced.

EDIT: Sorry- that would be the next book, Slave Ship.

 

A roster of bounty hunters to work with and yet a thing named Balancesheet is the only memorable character.

 

A tale of barving barves and the one barve who proves to be the most barviest of the barves.

 

Part of the tale of a barve that never gets eaten all at once; in fact, goes on to show he's too tough to be killed and eaten at all!

 

Boba Fett is here to do two things: kick @$$ and chew bubblegum...and he's all out of bubblegum.

 

Kuat^Kuat.

(Little math humor for everyone).

 

No thank you.

 

Five-way tie = not enough voting.

 

In the first book of Jeter's Tell, Don't Show trilogy, Boba Fett contemplates the Bounty Hunter Wars, Kuat of Kuat contemplates politics, Xizor contemplates treachery, an Assembler contemplates his Balancesheet, and everybody else contemplates Boba Fett.

 

This one deserves the win.