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Lit One Sentence or Less -- REBELS (SEASON 1)

Discussion in 'Literature' started by CooperTFN, Sep 18, 2012.

  1. Jedi Ben

    Jedi Ben Chosen One star 7

    Registered:
    Jul 19, 1999
    You may as well go onto Crucible ID
     
  2. Todd the Jedi

    Todd the Jedi Mod and Soliloquist of SWTV star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Oct 16, 2008
    Abeloth channels her inner Kenny McCormick and suffers from a variety of horrible, gruesome, and slightly hilarious deaths.
     
    DarthRelaxus likes this.
  3. The Compeer

    The Compeer Jedi Knight star 2

    Registered:
    Jun 12, 2013
    The internal flap on the hardcover sums up what's wrong with this book more succinctly than I can: "In the stunning finale of the epic Fate of the Jedi series, Jedi and Sith face off - with Coruscant as the battlefield." That's all that can be said to describe the finale to this nine-book fiasco, because that's all eight prior books could produce for a climax; the GFFA (both acronyms are equally pertinent) has become a cardboard cutout for poorly developed characters to play lightsaber-wielding Cops and Robbers in front of, because somewhere down the line it was decided that that was Star Wars was all about, and the book as good as says that that's what the saga will continue to consist of from here on out, because The Force Says So. Epic.
     
  4. DigitalMessiah

    DigitalMessiah Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 17, 2004
    Here's my weak, but true, first entry:

    Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
     
  5. AusStig

    AusStig Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 3, 2010
    This is the way you left me, I'm not pretending, no hope, no love, no glory, no happy ending.
     
  6. AusStig

    AusStig Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 3, 2010
    A book in which that bad guys are thwarted, but they get away and a new ally his chased away because she made one mistake.
     
  7. DigitalMessiah

    DigitalMessiah Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 17, 2004
    Troy Denning finally realizes what Fate of the Jedi's plot should be about when he co-opts the Mortis trilogy and decides that Abeloth can only be killed by the Dagger of Mortis, unfortunately he came to this realization when he was writing the final book of the series.
     
  8. Revanfan1

    Revanfan1 Force Ghost star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2013
    In this book, Abeloth is killed off at least three times, once by Saba biting her head off and once by Boba Fett because whatevs, and yet her main body survives having its brains smashed out by a stone pillar...great.
     
  9. The Compeer

    The Compeer Jedi Knight star 2

    Registered:
    Jun 12, 2013
    All this time you were pretending - so much for my happy ending. :p
     
    _Catherine_ likes this.
  10. Gamiel

    Gamiel Force Ghost star 6

    Registered:
    Dec 16, 2012
    This is the way the world ends; This is the way the world ends; This is the way the world ends; Not with a bang but a whimper.
     
    Plaristes and Random Comments like this.
  11. Nobody145

    Nobody145 Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Feb 9, 2007
    Three words sum up just how serious you should take this book (which is not at all)- Jedi spice cartel.
     
    tjace, Plaristes and Revanfan1 like this.
  12. Gamiel

    Gamiel Force Ghost star 6

    Registered:
    Dec 16, 2012
    o_O can you explain?
     
  13. Revanfan1

    Revanfan1 Force Ghost star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 3, 2013
    The Sith started their own news station on Coruscant to explain why the Jedi left–said explanation being that the Jedi Order was in fact, all along, a drug cartel–apparently, given the members are the same, it's supposed to be implied that they're drug traffickers from all the way back to the Vong war. How the people of Coruscant bought this, I do not know, except for the Law of Denning.
     
  14. Gamiel

    Gamiel Force Ghost star 6

    Registered:
    Dec 16, 2012
    Oh, I see
     
  15. Parnesius

    Parnesius Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Sep 8, 2012
    So...after twenty-one books and eight years or thereabouts...it turns out the post-FotJ galaxy looks a lot like the post-NJO galaxy...only, you know, the characters are fifteen years older or dead...actually, quite a lot of them are dead...and there's still an insane eldritch abomination-lady out there (and Abeloth, ho ho)...and Luke knows about Krayt but is kinda doomed to fail to stop him...and the Jedi didn't mature, and if they even got a Fate out of this, it's not a great one...the X-Men's fate, possibly...or the Jedi and Sith get the Joker's "we'll be doing this forever"...and for now, that's kind of the 'main' EU finale...well, there it is.
     
  16. DigitalMessiah

    DigitalMessiah Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 17, 2004
    Even the characters that are still alive are actually dead.
     
    DarthRelaxus likes this.
  17. AlyxDinas

    AlyxDinas Jedi Knight star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 12, 2010
    Wherin we learn that balance was not something achieved by Anakin but is really just the Jedi and Sith going about their "natures" for all time because hey what not the name of the series is Star Wars or whatever' stop asking me I'm Troy Denning and I rained on the days I was booooorn!

    Or something.
     
  18. DarthJenari

    DarthJenari Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Dec 17, 2011
    A series that was doomed to fail from the moment Natasi Daala became Chief of State reaches a pathetic, long awaited end.
     
    GrandMasterKatarn and Grey1 like this.
  19. Jeff_Ferguson

    Jeff_Ferguson Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 15, 2006
    You know your plot makes no sense when after nine books, you need The Clone Wars to explain it for you.
     
  20. DarthSanctimonious

    DarthSanctimonious Jedi Knight star 3

    Registered:
    Sep 18, 2006
    The last and best part of FotJ, for exactly that reason.
     
  21. The Compeer

    The Compeer Jedi Knight star 2

    Registered:
    Jun 12, 2013
    Yeah, I wish. It's painful enough and sufficiently lacking in resolution that even a sentiment of "oh, thank god that's over" doesn't really ring true.
     
  22. DigitalMessiah

    DigitalMessiah Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 17, 2004
    You know it's not over because Denning is just going to write the next novel.
     
  23. LightsaberAccident

    LightsaberAccident Jedi Padawan star 1

    Registered:
    Aug 26, 2013
    Tentacles everywhere.
     
  24. Havac

    Havac Former Moderator star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 29, 2005
    [​IMG]

    Worst book ever, man.
     
    GrandMasterKatarn likes this.
  25. JackG

    JackG Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Aug 15, 2011
    The cover is representative of the novel in a way not intended: the whole contrivance was crudely and obviously put together, offering nothing new or enjoyable.
    [​IMG]

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