Before Options ---- Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, mission -- COMPLETE -- 21-Oct-2007

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by ardavenport, Aug 1, 2007.

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  1. JazzFox Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Oct 26, 2006
    star 1
    "Yes, I would like to speak to someone at Flumus, Jorok and Zah'quin about a contract of theirs."

    *chuckles* That's got to be my favorite line, the names are so funny! I like how they are perfectly normal to everyone involved though. It makes me think of the ridiculous name of a law firm in my general area of the woods; it's called Allen, Allen, Allen & Allen. Redundant perhaps? Just a little...

    Anyway, great update; I loved it, as usual.
  2. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    I find OBi-Wan and Mayb's thoughts of each other interesting.

    Another little bird joined Qui-Gon, a brilliant blue one, chirping cheerfully on his shoulder. It matched his eyes.


    She is certianly noticing Qui-Gon quite a bit. Not that I can blame her. ;)

  3. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Loved the update. But really? Obi-Wan as a skinny ordinary boy? If so, sign me up! :p

    Obi-Wan's teeth clenched.

    Qui-Gon's admonishment to restrain all of his impulses for the good of their mission made much more sense to the young man. It felt right. His thoughts easily descended upon all the reasons why he would not want to even touch Mayb.

    All of her best features were only physical beauty. She had no depth at all beyond that.

    Not only was she haughtily ignorant of Jedi, she seemed incapable of absorbing any facts about them that she did not like.

    She only valued material possessions. And she equated happiness with the exchange of gifts.

    She spent huge amounts of her time doing nothing more productive than maintaining and artificially enhancing her appearance.

    While he did not think she was unintelligent, Mayb stubbornly seemed to believe that anything that she believed was true was unalterably so.

    A stability, an insulating calm filled him with the increasing mental distance he placed between himself and Mayb, as if the Force itself were pushing her away.


    =D=
  4. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4


    ratna: Mayb can appreciate a good looking Jedi master, but she just doesn't appreciate Obi-Wan's virtues. :p Thanks for the reply!

    dianethx: Thanks! I think one thing I like most with Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan stories is that Obi-Wan is still in his learning time of life, and Qui-Gon, the Jedi Master, is always teaching, and it can be about anything. There's always something new to discover with them. :)

    KELIA: Thank-you! I think Mayb is getting a glimmer of a hint that Qui-Gon isn't for her. [face_mischief]

    JazzFox: Ooooh, I like the repetitive nature of the Allen law firm. I suppose the SW equivalent might be Blork, Blork, Blork, Blork and Zhod. :) Thanks for reading!

    Healer_Leona: It's hard not to notice Qui-Gon.:) And Mayb has already noticed how big and broad-shouldered he is. She just hasn't figured out the Jedi part. Thanks for reading!

    VaderLVR64: Thanks! Yeah, Mayb doesn't know a good looking Obi-Wan when she sees one. :p



  5. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4

    === oO%*%Oo ==%%%== oO%*%Oo ==%%%== oO%*%Oo === - - part 7


    Qui-Gon spotted his Padawan in the spacious lobby of the Grand Muzat by a repulsor-supported sculpture that stretched up to the ceiling in glittering golds and silvers. As soon as Obi-Wan recognized him and Mayb, a stately woman in a maroon business suit turned toward them as well.

    "Master Qui-Gon," she addressed him. "I am Zi-Zom Edoma, Mak Edona's legal representative."

    "I am pleased to meet you," he said politely, bowing.

    "I am sure that your Padawan is capable, but I needed to speak with you directly about the document he presented at my office."

    "Well, I don't need to be here for this," Mayb announced, tacitly dismissing the woman as she adjusted the green drape over her shoulders. Her shiny gold dress swished around her knees as she began to walk away.

    "You can wait in our suite and see if it is to your liking." Qui-Gon's eyes flicked toward Obi-Wan who hastened to go with her. He then extended his arm toward a long, wide corridor that led to the Grand Muzat's lounge. The glowing sign over the entry archway said it was called Mimi's. Edoma did not speak until they were seated and the service droid had taken their orders.

    "I was surprised when Padawan Kenobi appeared in our office. I was even more surprised by the contract he asked us to analyze."

    "Was it not your contract?" Qui-Gon asked looking at the lawyer over the table's small covered glow light.

    "It was," she replied, gazing downward. "At one time." Grimacing, she looked back up at him. "Though it still retained our signature codes, it was altered. And not by my firm."

    Qui-Gon raised his eyebrows, inviting her to continue. Zi-Zon Edoma listed the major agreements between the contract parties, Qui-Gon Jinn and Mayb Oeschus Arimba. The option gave any suitor exclusive rights to negotiate terms of marriage for a fixed time, without the possibility of there being a bidding war with others for the intended mate. The contract itself was not very long. The appendices to it were twenty times longer than the main body of the document.

    Edoma reviewed the main points of the contract and Qui-Gon patiently listened. Most of it he already knew, but the discourse gave him time to evaluate his companion. He sensed nothing other than professional intensity from her. If she was nervous or lying, she was exceptionally good at controlling it.

    The droid arrived with their drinks, a zuno tea in a delicate ceramic cup for Qui-Gon and a glittering amber tingle-juice for her. Qui-Gon paid the droid for both of them.

    "But there are some clauses that my firm did NOT included in the document sent to the Yube Krim Academy." She reached inside her suit jacket and laid a blue data chip before Qui-Gon. "This is a sealed, notarized copy of our original contract and it is on file with the Cucadu courts."

    Qui-Gon did not even glance down at the chip laying on the white table covering. "And the difference are?"

    "Some clauses have been added regarding the status of both parties when traveling outside the Republic." She named several planets and territories in the outer reaches of the galaxy. Qui-Gon noticed immediately that in all the ones he recognized slavery was legal, sometimes traditional. Edoma continued, in a careful measured tone, describing the important points of the alterations to the contract. The added clauses specified that local laws and customs regarding both betrothed and married persons overrode Republic law. So, with the existing contract, Qui-Gon, as the purchaser, could declare Mayb as his property if they were to travel to any of the named places in those clauses.

    Qui-Gon listened to her building her case, her defense. He judged her to be an excellent lawyer. She had seen the danger, the purpose of the changes and what her cousin, and her law firm, could be accused of. But she never speculated about what the danger was, never mentioned it. Her arguments stayed in the safe area of proving that she, her cousin and her law firm h
  6. Valairy Scot Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    Boom! :eek: What just went boom - and did Obi-Wen sense it in time to get Mayb and he away from the "big boom?"

    Clever author, lull us with contract details and throw a "boom" in at the end. [face_shame_on_you]
  7. ratna Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2007
    star 4
    This is just getting curiouser and curiouser!

    Wonder if the skanky lawyer had anything to do with the boom?
  8. KELIA Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 26, 2005
    star 6
    Somewhere above, he heard the distant sound of something going 'Boom'.

    Uh oh, what has Mayb done now? I certainly hope Qui-Gon can come to her rescue in time.

    Hmmmm....what is going on with these contracts? Very interesting indeed.

    Great update

    =D= =D= =D= =D=
  9. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    I can ony hope th big 'boom' was no where in the vicinity of MAyb and Obi-Wan.
  10. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Qui-Gon sat back, suddenly wary, but it was not caused by the calculating lawyer sitting before him.

    Somewhere above, he heard the distant sound of something going 'Boom'.


    Uh oh. What does that mean? [face_worried]

    Great update! =D=
  11. Fifilla Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 9, 2006
    star 3
    I missed an update...

    Part 6:
    They sat at a small intimate table in a garden café with no one else seated near them, all perfect and romantic. They had just shared a delicious late afternoon snack. And Qui-Gon was quite charming. To the birds.
    [face_laugh] Poor Mayb - Qui-Gon is paying more attention to the birds. [face_laugh]

    Obi-Wan had told her the day before that Qui-Gon would never wear any hair adornment in the shape of a bird. But apparently he did not mind if live ones nested in it.
    [face_laugh] Great!


    Part 7:
    Somewhere above, he heard the distant sound of something going 'Boom'.
    [face_worried] I hope, it's not Obi-Wan and Mayb who have caused the 'Boom'?
  12. Persephone_Kore Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2006
    star 4
    Eep! I am duly alarmed.

    I really enjoyed Qui-Gon's analysis of the conversation.
  13. JazzFox Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Oct 26, 2006
    star 1
    Yay! I love updates. :D

    I somehow get the feeling that not only were Mayb and Obi-wan in the near vicinity of the Boom, but that at least one of them was the cause for it....

    Poor Obi-wan, babysitting the attractive annoyance again.

  14. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4
    Valairy_Scot: Thanks for reading! Aaaaaah, and how could Obi-Wan NOT be near the big boom? [face_mischief]

    ratna: Yes, there a few twists here and there for them to go through still. Thanks for reading!

    KELIA: Thank-you! Aaaaah, I'm sure the Jedi will be able to handle the 'boom'. :) It's the other stuff that they might have trouble with. [face_mischief]

    Healer_Leona: Ooooh, but Jedi just attract 'boom's. [face_mischief] Thanks for the reply!

    VaderLVR64: Oh, it's always nice to end a story chapter with a little 'boom'. [face_mischief] Thanks for reading!

    Fifilla: Thanks for reading! I enjoyed putting in the little scene with Qui-Gon and the birds. I'm sure he's friendly with little birds. :) Looks nice, but it would be impractical with them standing on you. [face_worried].

    Persephone_Kore: Yeah, Qui-Gon can handle himself around lawyers. Glad you liked their conversation!

    JazzFox: Aaaaaah, Obi-Wan can handle Mayb. . . . I think. [face_mischief] Thanks for the reply!


  15. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4
    === oO%*%Oo ==%%%== oO%*%Oo ==%%%== oO%*%Oo === - - part 8


    The shiny pink fresher door slid open.

    "So, do you think Qui-Gon will be long, talking to that lawyer?" Mayb's voice came out of the open door, but she remained hidden inside. He could hear some liquid in a container being shaken.

    "I don't know," Obi-Wan replied. He had been disappointed by Zi-Zom Edoma's cool reception, but as soon as she asked for his Master, he had been obliged to take her to Qui-Gon.

    He looked out of their suite window wall at the balcony's miniature garden and the faint blue glow of the privacy screen beyond it. The Grand Muzat prided itself on serving its patrons' every need (for a fabulous price, of course) including their demands for security. Seeker droids were not permitted. Their suite included a large pink and watery green sitting room and three separate sleeping rooms along with a spacious fresher decorated in polished pastel stone. Mayb had immediately taken advantage of it. She had also asked when her things would be brought from the ship. Unless Qui-Gon intended to buy her new things.

    Obi-Wan felt himself comfortably at peace. His trepidation about Mayb and his own impulses had gone, evaporated and receded in the mental distance between her, a young socialite and him, a Jedi Padawan. There was nothing between them.

    "Well, it's a shame," Mayb said. "Qui-Gon's probably down there right now arranging for Mak Edoma to buy off his option. I was certainly willing to give it more of a try." Her voice emerged from the fresher.

    Obi-Wan turned to her. Mayb stepped up to him and slid her arms around his waist. Her golden hair was perfect as usual, cascading down her bare shoulders, her green drape clinging to her body. The gold dress that was supposed to be under it was missing. And she was barefoot.

    "I still am."

    Suddenly he felt yesterday's hormones returning, stronger than ever. He stared, as shocked by her sudden advance as he was by his vanishing control.

    "I don't think we should. . . .should. . . ." She was rubbing her head against his shoulder. And other parts of her were rubbing against other parts of him.

    "Why not?" He was swaying with her now as she tasted his collar bone, her breath warm on his skin. "I know you're supposed to take care of me for Qui-Gon. He's not interested. And I can tell you are." She grinned, wiggled her hips and pressing them into him. A single high pitched syllable came out of him.

    "We might as well give it a try," she said softly into his neck.

    'You must follow your feelings in this, Obi-Wan,' had been what Qui-Gon first told him that morning. But Qui-Gon always said that. Had Mayb been listening to them from the fresher on the ship?

    Mayb's lips followed his jawline back and she began mouthing his ear. Obi-Wan gasped with an audible sigh, it felt so amazingly good. He couldn't believe it. It was his ear. His thoughts swam with anticipation of what it would feel like when Mayb's mouth moved onto other places.

    She wrapped her arms around his neck, using her weight to pull him down to his knees. He could not remember what they had been talking about or where they were. He felt himself slipping into what was to come, losing control of his body, his thoughts, the Force. . .

    Mayb squealed as he leapt up and violently thrust her away, the Force sending her flying back into the fresher to thump and skid on the smooth, hard floor. His body shaking, Obi-Wan swept his outstretched hand before him to close the door.

    Nothing happened.

    He scrambled forward and slammed his hand on the locking controls. The pink door slid shut over Mayb's screech of rage. Furious thumping assaulted the door from inside the fresher. Knees shaking, Obi-Wan slid down to the floor, his back to the door.

    Gulping breaths of air, he tried to reassemble his earlier calm, but it was gone. It had been an illusion all along. Behind him, Mayb screamed and pounded harder on the door. Obi-Wan concentrated on breathing slower, but he couldn'
  16. Valairy Scot Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    Oh, goodness - giggles - a woman spurned is almost more dangerous than mere attackers, considering how Obi-Wan battled the attackers and curled up taking Mayb's less serious but just as determined kicks. [face_laugh]

    Obi's talk with Qui-Gon should be - er - interesting.

    Loved the chapter. All of it.
  17. Fifilla Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 9, 2006
    star 3
    =D= Loved the whole chapter!

    "Are they gone?" Mayb breathed behind him.

    Obi-Wan gulped, his saber still held up before him defensively, but he sensed no more intruders either in the suite or outside.

    "Yes."

    Mayb's small hand grabbed his Padawan's tail lock and jerked his head backward.

    Ouch! [face_laugh] Poor Obi-Wan!

    Next chapter should be interesting, I can't wait to read Mayb's and Obi-Wan's explanations of what had happened.
  18. KELIA Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 26, 2005
    star 6
    My goodness, Mayb didn't take "no" very well, did she?

    I'm just glad Obi-Wan survived her little...outburst.

    she started as if coming awake from a dream.

    Hmmmm....very interesting.

    Great update

    =D= =D= =D= =D=
  19. Ara-gon Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2005
    star 2
    If you didn't give us Mayb's pov I might start wondering if her shallowness was a front. But you do. So I don't.

    Great post showing the conversation between Qui-Gon and the lawyer. And then "boom." Right outta the blue. Good job!

    Oh, Obi-Wan, if you're going to turn a girl down, turn her down. But do it with a tad more grace than Force-shoving her across the room. Let her have her dignity. Especially Mayb.

  20. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    Holy moly, quite the little spitfire she is! [face_laugh] [face_laugh] Can't help but laugh at her as she seems to get her way most times and I like that this time she didn't. And better for both their safety. LOL

    Poor Obi-Wan, he'll be battered and bruised now.
  21. ratna Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2007
    star 4
    ouch!

    for all parties concerned.
    [face_beatup]
  22. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4
    Valairy_Scot: Thanks, glad you liked it! Obi-Wan really needs to learn a little more about women. The problem with Mayb attacking him is that she can't really hurt him, so he can only defend himself and not attack back.

    Fifilla: Thanks! There's a little more coming.

    KELIA: Thank-you! Fortunately, Mayb was only in bare feet and standing on a slippery floor, so she didn't hurt him much.

    Ara-gon: Thanks! Oh, it's fun putting in a 'boom' in the middle of an ordinary conversation. [face_mischief]. And it's true, the Force is not a good way to say, 'no'.

    Healer_Leona: Yeah, Mayb does have a temper when things don't go the way she thinks they should. I suppose, being a Jedi Obi-Wan could leap up with his lightsaber and end it all, but since she couldn't really hurt him, he acted only defensively. Thanks for the reply!

    ratna: Yes, ouch for Obi-Wan, but he's tough. :) Thanks for reading!


  23. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4
    -- this is only a little post since I'll be away this weekend and the one after this is long and there's no good way to break it up.



    === oO%*%Oo ==%%%== oO%*%Oo ==%%%== oO%*%Oo === - - part 9


    The lift doors opened.

    "Out!" Master Devano growled, prodding the prisoner's leg. Qui-Gon gave him a push to get him moving. As they exited, a second lift arrived with the local constables and the hotel manager. Devano charged down the hall with Qui-Gon and their prisoner following.

    Devano stopped at a blackened, blasted part of the hallway. The door of one suite was gone, shattered into pieces scattered inside.

    Inside, the main room of the suite was blasted, broken and flooded, but the fretting cleaning droids and housekeeping staff remained in a less destroyed corner of the room while constables and technicians scanned the wreckage. A moment later the constables from the lift joined them. A surly, craggy-faced inspector scowled at them while she helped direct the activity. They had agreed to allow the Jedi a moment to speak to the suspect. The local authorities did not really have much choice, since Jedi authority through the galactic senate easily overruled them.

    Knight Yudi, a tall, thin Quorasi stood in a doorway. They went through it into one of the suite's undamaged rooms. Inside, Obi-Wan sat on a sleep couch; he looked damp. Qui-Gon recognized Dean Hawxol in a slightly wrinkled, dark blue suit with an orange shirt and white scarf tied around his neck.

    "You!" Mayb leaped out of her chair at him.

    She aimed a kick at his shin but he evaded it, not wanting her to hurt her toes on his heavy boots.

    "If you think I would EVER marry you after this - - "

    "Marry?" Devano said with surprise. Yudi shurgged.

    "- - then you are even more of a BUCKETHEAD than you look!!!" she screamed. Qui-Gon easily caught her wrists and evaded more kicks. She tried to push him away and he let go.

    "Then our contract can be terminated," he said calmly, folding his arms into his robe sleeves.

    Mayb lifted her robe and thrust her hip forward, revealing the bulge of a new and purpling bruise. "Look at what he did!" She pointed at Obi-Wan, who looked like he going to be sick. "And this!" She pushed her white sleeve back, shoving a bruised elbow at him.

    "We shall seek medical attention for you immediately," Qui-Gon promised. Clearly unsatisfied with this, Mayb continued to glare up at him. Then her eyes fell on a new offender.

    "And you!!" she raged, pointing. "Don't think this means you can walk into this. I'm not giving out ANY options after this!" Surprised now, Qui-Gon looked at their prisoner, a middle-aged male human with slightly graying, light brown hair and beard. His otherwise distinguished green suit was a little crumpled after he had practically collided with Qui-Gon as he rushed out of the lift into the lobby of the Grand Muzat. His face was bruised where Qui-Gon had struck him with the butt end of his lightsaber hilt while he disarmed the much larger and armored attackers behind him.

    "That's not Mak Edoma," Devano said by way of explanation. Qui-Gon raised his brows and saw a similar look of surprise on his Padawan's face.

    "What are you talking about, you. . . . you hairy little wart?!" Mayb shouted down at Devano.

    "THAT'S NOT MAK EDOMA YOU RAVING TWIT!!!" Devano boomed back, his voice filling the room. Mayb leaped back into Hawxol, both of them shocked.

    "His name is Aimoh'toh," Devano continued, still loud but no longer shouting loud enough to be heard on the entire floor. "He's the slaver that THAT poovus scumbag was going to sell you to!" Devano pointed back at Hawxol who had gone pale. Mayb looked from one to the other, her mouth open, frozen between surprise and outrage. Aimoh'toh only glared maliciously at Devano.

    "What is he talking about?" Mayb demanded.

    "Mayb Oeschus, my dear, I might have. . . ." Hawxol stammered, ". . . misrepresented, this particular - - OW!"

    Mayb's kick finally connected. Howxol bent over his injur
  24. JazzFox Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Oct 26, 2006
    star 1
    oh goodness gracious! Looks like everyone's had an eventful day. I feel so bad for Obi-wan though, Mayb is a bit to forward isn't she? I'm glad she finally got to kick something though, something she could actually hurt, and something that deserved it. :D
  25. Valairy Scot Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    Oh, dear, I'm confused...must reread.

    Give Mayb steel-toed boots and she might do some actual damage.
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