Pirates of the Caribbean

JACK: Do us a favor...I know it's hard...but stay here, and try not to do anything...stupid.


*SB*

 

BARBOSSA: I don't trust your word.

JACK: Yes, well, out of the two of us I'm the only one who hasn't committed mutiny, so it will be my word that we'll be trusting. Savvy?


*SB*

 

ELIZABETH: Will, how often must I ask you to call me Elizabeth?

WILL: At least once more Miss Swann, as always.


*SB*

 

JACK: Stop blowing holes in my ship!


*SB*

 

WILL: We're going to steal a ship? That ship?

JACK: Commandeer. We're going to commandeer that ship. Nautical term.


*SB*

 

JACK: Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest... Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid.


*SB*

 

WILL: Elizabeth goes free!

BARBOSSA: Yes, we know that part, anything else?


*SB*

 

JACK: You, sailor!

MR. GIBBS: Cotton, sir.

JACK: Mr. Cotton. Do you have the courage and fortitude to follow orders and stay true in the face of danger and almost certain death?

[Pause.]

JACK: Mr. Cotton! Answer, man!

MR. GIBBS: He's a mute, sir. Poor devil had his tongue cut out, so he trained the parrot to talk for him. No one's yet figured how.

JACK: Mr. Cotton's... parrot. Same question.

PARROT: [squawk] When do we sail. When do we sail.

MR. GIBBS: Mostly, we figure, that means 'yes.'


*SB*

 

RAGETTI: Is it supposed to be doing that?

[pointing to the Black Pearl which is sailing away]

PINTEL: They're stealing our ship!

RAGETTI: Bloody Pirates!


*SB*

 

ELIZABETH: Whose side is Jack on?

WILL: At the moment?


*SB*

 

PINTEL: It was only after that, did we find out that it was Bootstrap's blood we needed.

RAGETTI: Now that's what you call ironic.


*SB*

 

HARBORMASTER: Hold up there, you! It's a shilling to tie up your boat at the dock... and I shall need to know your name.

JACK: What do you say to three shillings and we forget the name.

HARBORMASTER: Welcome to Port Royal, Mr. Smith!


*SB*

 

WILL: This is either madness... or brilliance.

JACK: It's remarkable how often those two traits coincide.


*SB*

 

NORRINGTON: Mr. Sparrow, you will accompany these men to the helm where you will give them directions to Isle de Muerta. And for the remainder of the voyage I want you to consider every possible meaning of the words, "Silent as the grave." Am I clear?

JACK: Inescapably.


*SB*

 

JACK: Scarlet!

[She slaps him]

JACK: I'm not sure I deserved that.

[A blond woman approaches]

JACK: Giselle!

GISELLE: Who was she?!

[She slaps him]

JACK: I may have deserved that.


*SB*

 

JACK: One question about your business, boy, or there's no use going: This girl...how far are you willing to go to save her?

WILL: I'd die for her.

JACK: Oh good. No worries then.


*SB*

 

JACK: [Imitating Elizabeth] "It must have been terrible for you, Jack. Must have been terrible." Well, it bloody well is now!


*SB*

 

JACK: There'll be no living with her after this.


*SB*

 

RAGETTI: This is just like what the Greeks done at Troy. 'Cept they was in a horse instead 'o dresses. Wooden 'orse.


*SB*

 

WILL: She goes free!

BARBOSSA: What's in your head, boy? You only have one shot and we can't die.

JACK: Please don't do anything stupid!

WILL: You can't.
[points gun at his own throat]
WILL: I can!

JACK: Like that.


*SB*

 

JACK: Easy on the goods, darling.


*SB*

 

Taeriel's favorite... (I might not have gotten this exactly right either...)

JACK: No, no, not good! You've burned the food, the shade, the rum!

ELIZABETH: Yes, the rum's gone.

JACK: Why's the rum gone?

ELIZABETH: One, because it is a vile drink that turns even the most respectable men into complete scoundrels, and two, that signal is over a mile high. The entire royal navy is out looking for me, do you think there's even the slightest chance that they'll miss that?

JACK: But why's the rum gone?!


*SB*

 

BARBOSSA: And I want 50% of ye plunder!

JACK: 10

BARBOSSA: 40

Jack Sparrow: 25!

BARBOSSA: [Considering]

JACK: and I'll buy you a hat! A really BIG one!


*SB*

 

[Anamaria has just slapped Jack]
WILL: I suppose you didn't deserve that one either.

JACK: No, that one I deserved.


*SB*

 

ANNA MARIA: You stole my ship!

JACK: Borrowed, borrowed without permission. But with every intention of bringing it back.

ANNA MARIA: But you didn't.

JACK: You'll get another one.

WILL: A better one.

JACK: A better one. (waves his hands around)

WILL: That one.

JACK: What one?

WILL: That one. (point to Interseptor)

JACK: That one!

JACK: Aye, that one. What say thee?


*SB*