Story [PotC] Escaping Prison (One-Shot)

Discussion in 'Non Star Wars Fan Fiction' started by Jedi Gunny, Jul 23, 2008.

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  1. Jedi Gunny Yahtzee Host

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    Title: Escaping Prison
    Author: JEDIGUNSHIP
    Timeframe: Right after PotC: Curse of the Black Pearl
    Characters: Pintel and Ragetti
    Summary: Right after the events of PotC: Curse of the Black Pearl, pirates Pintel and Ragetti are sent to prison. Now, they try to find a way to escape jail and head back out onto the seas.

    This is the first PotC fic on this board.

    It was dark in the prison cell. Water dripped constantly inside the stones tht made up the cell, and the occasional drop landed on the occupants of the cell. "This is hogwash," stated Pintel. "Three weeks in this cell, and yet we did nothing wrong."

    "I think we did something to make them British mad," said Ragetti, who was fooling around with his wooden eye.

    "At least we broke the curse," said Pintel, standing up to pace around the cell, his grimy head illuminated by the faint light from the nearby torch. "Ol' Jack did it to us. He got back at us for the mutiny, and now he's on the seas and we're not."

    "And Turner," said Ragetti, "he must have done it. He was the son of Bootstrap, so he must have lifted the curse himself."

    "Anyways, we gotta find a way out, mate," said Pintel, now pacing around the cell. "We have to think like pirates."

    "We are pirates," offered Ragetti.

    "I know!" shouted Pintel. "We could lure the dog with the keys."

    "And how do you think that's going to work?" asked his counterpart, still messing with his wooden eye.

    "I'll tell you," Pintel said, sitting down close to Ragetti's ear. "We're going to lure the dog with a bone of some kind. It couldn't not give us the keys for a nice bone."

    "That's your great plan?" asked Ragetti. "I could come up with something even better than that."

    "Well, what do you suggest we do?" asked Pintel.

    "Try to pop open the cell with leaverage."

    "Leaverage? We don't have any of that, genius!"

    "Yes we do," said Ragetti, pointing to something. pintel looked at what his fellow was pointing at; it was a large piece of driftwood, obviously brought in by another prisoner long ago.

    "You thinking what I'm thinking?" asked Pintel.

    "Spring the lock, open the cell, escape," said Ragetti. "Should be easy."

    Grabbing the driftwood, the two began to look for a way to spring the lock and escape the prison. "Look, our guns!" said Pintel, which gave him more incentive to work on getting out. Sure enoguh, the guns were on a table, just sitting there for the taking, or, as Ragetti would call it, "rightful reclaiming". Placing the driftwood underneath the door, the two shoved it down, but the cell door remianed locked. "Now what?" sked Pintel.

    "We gotta keep trying!" said Ragetti. "Get the wood under that opening. Maybe we can lift it enough and use it as a wedge . . ."

    "And slip out underneath?" asked Pintel. "Brilliant, Ragetti!" Pushing down on the wood, the door slowly creeped up, groaning slightly as it went. "Ha ha!" Pintel said. "It's working!" All of a sudden, the wood broke and both men fell on the floor. "Agh!" he yelled, inciting a response from one of the other cells.

    "Shut up over there!" the voice said. "Stupid pirates . . ."

    "You shut up!" yeled Pintel, but Ragetti restrained him. "Fighting should not be our first option. We have to use our brains to get out."

    "And how do you suggest we do that?" asked Pintel.

    "This." Ragetti picked up the piece of wood and slammed it into the cell's bars; even though it did nothing, he figured out another way. "I reckon that if I could slip through the bar, I could grab a gun and shoot the lock."

    "You're skinny enough!" said Pintel, a mischevious grin forming on his mouth. "This could work!"

    "Hold the bars apart so that I can slip through," Ragetti instructed. Pintel grabbed the bars and pulled them in opposite directions.

    "Go. . .mfgh . . . " Pintel groaned; he had muscles, but the bars were fighting him. Ragetti maybe had a minute to get out before Pintel's muscles gave out.

    "I'm going," said Ragetti, turning sideways to attempt to move through the gap create
  2. poor yorick Ex-Mod

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    Oh, good . . . our first POTC fic.

    I'm a not-very-secret fan of that deranged series. :p

    You don't see too many Pintel and Ragetti fics, and it's a pity, really. Those guys have some of the best comedy bits in the films.

    I don't know if you were deliberately parodying the Jack/Will escape in COTBP here, but it was hilarious to watch the ridiculous sidekicks attempt to pull off what the ridiculous heroes did so easily.

    For Pintel and Ragetti, it doesn't work . . . quite so well. :p

    These were some sections that cracked me up:

    "Anyways, we gotta find a way out, mate," said Pintel, now pacing around the cell. "We have to think like pirates."

    "We are pirates," offered Ragetti.

    "I know!" shouted Pintel. "We could lure the dog with the keys."


    For some reason, this made me lol. I could hear the characters saying that dialogue, and could just imagine Ragetti's ever-so-helpful "discovery" that the pirates were, in fact, pirates, and Pintel's annoyed reaction. Bringing in the dog so casually was pretty funny too . . . making a big deal of him would have ruined the joke, I think. Instead, it's just: "AAAARGH! Why is that thing everywhere?!" :p

    I also laughed at the idea of Pintel heroically prying the bars apart for Ragetti, and of course, Ragetti losing his eye at approximately the moment a normal hero would be dramatically bursting into freedom.

    There may be something wrong with me, but this got me too:

    "But we won't have room for it," said Pintel. "We should leave it here."

    Room for it where? In one of the boxes full of possessions you don't have, on account of your being a pirate escaping from prison? For some reason, I think these insane little throwaways actually work better in print than onscreen. The films don't give you much of a chance to ask, "Wait--what?!" :p

    And of course this one got me:

    "It's the Bible. If I see it, I should take it. 'Tis a holy book."

    Pure Ragetti logic. :p A decent man always ought to have a Bible on hand, therefore that's the first thing you ought to steal.

    This was silly in exactly the right way for me. Thanks for 15 minutes of goofy reading pleasure.
  3. Jedi Gunny Yahtzee Host

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    Thanks for reading. I'll try to make those changes next time I write something like this. :D
  4. poor yorick Ex-Mod

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    . . . did I ask for changes? :confused: I liked it. I certainly wasn't trying to slip in unsolicited concrit or anything!
  5. Jedi Gunny Yahtzee Host

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    Oh, I thought you wanted a small change in the story. I was wrong then; my mistake. Thanks for reading again.
  6. Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Master

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    Feb 5, 2005
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    I read this last night but was too tired to comment and have that comment be comprehensible. :p

    This made me laugh. Very hard. [face_laugh] I think you really got Pintel and Ragetti's characters down, I could actually hear the actors' voices saying the words. :D

    Always wondered how they got out of prison, especially with a dog and a Bible. I guess now I know. :p

    Awesome!
  7. Jedi Gunny Yahtzee Host

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    Thanks. I was hoping that my story would nail the part in between the first two movies.
  8. NYCitygurl Manager Emeritus

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    Jul 20, 2002
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    This is so cute!! I love those guys :D
  9. Jedi Gunny Yahtzee Host

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  10. KELIA Manager Emeritus

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    [face_laugh][face_laugh][face_laugh][face_laugh]

    I loved all the banter while the boys were trying to escape. That's the best part of watching the two of them, IMHO.

    Great job on this

    =D= =D= =D= =D=
  11. Jedi Gunny Yahtzee Host

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    Thank you. I liked working with these two characters. :D
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