Beyond - Legends Quest for Perfection - pre unifying force

I'd like as much criticism(positive AND negative) as possible please


It stung his eyes. It blurred his vision. As Jacen practiced his litesabre technique, his forehead and now face was running with sweat. Hundreds of beads of liquid. Clammy and cold to the touch, but with every drawn breath, the beads waged their own war upon the young Jedi. Forcing his eyes shut for the slightest of a moment and he was barraged with practice lasers by his sparring his droids.
Three of them, all neatly fabricated by the prodigy himself. In his few waking hours of alone time, he spent perfecting his skills and abilities, and these three droids were simply but a minor example of how he perfected himself. PD-01, PD-02 and PD-04 were there designations. PD-03?s production went astray when Jacen accidentally programmed his power converter with the software typical to that of a maid droid.
He remained in a slightly crouched position. His feet ? shoulder width apart while his right foot was drawn back giving him a wide base and therefore rendering maximum balance. With his right hand he held the hilt of his precious tool. Some considered it a weapon, others a symbol. Whatever the case, it still remained a litesabre, and it also remained Jacen?s most valuable possession. With his thumb hovering mere milimetres from the power switch, he applied the required pressure, and was greeted with the luminous beauty, which was his Jedi tool. His Jedi weapon. His Jedi symbol. His litesabre.
The blade was an off blue color, and it gave off a stunning amount of concentrated light. Illuminating its owner?s face, Jacen?s features could now be made out in the dismal training room. Scars. Five years of waged battle against the infamous Yuuzhan Vong. He bore them proudly however, and unlike others ? did not pursue reconstructive surgery, which would rid him of such hideous mars. Although a patchy beard could be found forming a residence around his chin. Brown with a reddish tint, his facial hair was only slightly darker than the hair on his scalp. Which was now neatly cropped and kept presentable.
What was most disturbing however, was the effect the litesabre had on the young man?s eyes. Anyone who gazed into those pearls only caught a hint of the hardships and sufferings that this jedi has been put through. Although the clouds swirling in his eyes were a dark green color, some claimed they could make out faint hints of red, representing the blood spilled by the billions of casualties in this horrifying war.
Quickly adjusting to the new tone of light in the room, Jacen tossed the hilt of his blade back and forth while turning in a full circle to quickly assess his opponents. The droids had arrayed themselves effectively in an equatorial triangle. Essentially, no direction was better to face than another when faced with this situation. Jacen was stuck and realized he would soon have to penetrate this perimeter, and do so quickly, if he wished to succeed through this drill.
Drawing in a deep breath and relaxing his muscles, Jacen allowed himself to tap into the flow of the force that surrounded him. He could feel the presence of his sister within the complex. His uncle Luke was a very faint beacon, but nonetheless, Jacen was assured of his presence somewhere out there. The trees not fifty kilometers from the Academy, the bird flying over head, the hundreds of young Jedi students attending their classes. All of this and Billions of other living beings contributed to the steady flow which was the force. The all-binding power, which gives the Jedi their power.
With a new revival of energy, the young man promptly leaped high into the air. Simultaneously, both 02 and 04 advanced into the middle of triangle so that Jacen would have to land upon them, and effectively ending the battle. However, he altered his course in mid air and landed mere inches from PD-02. Before the droid could pivot and end the battle by tagging Jacen, the young man tagged the droid with his litesabre and ended his brief stint in the drill. In doing so however, Jacen had absent

 

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I liked that/// are jaggie and jayagonna be together in it

 

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UPP