Before Qui-Gon and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day (Humor, One post ) - Author Replies 10/8

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Layren, May 11, 2004.

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  1. Layren Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    star 5
    AUTHOR NOTE..

    A very big THANK YOU!!!! to those of you who nominated this fic for the awards!!! [:D]



    Title: Qui-Gon and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.

    Timeframe: Qui-Gon is 11 years old.

    Author: Layren

    Rating: G

    Summary: 11-year-old apprentice Qui-Gon has a very bad day. Based on the popular children?s book Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.

    Category: Humor

    Disclaimer: I make no profit from this story. I only play in the sandboxes George Lucas and Judith Viorst created. Kyran and Devin belong to me. Please ask before using their characters.

    Author's Note: Special thanks to Greencat336 for urging me to write this and to Durhelediel and Charmisjess for beta'ing. I love ya'll! *big group hug*

    *****

    I went to sleep and forgot to set my bedside chrono to wake me up, and when I woke up I tripped over my school bag and by accident I dropped my only clean tunic down the laundry chute so I had to wear a dirty one, and when I put on my boots I discovered they were too small?and I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

    At breakfast I wanted a muja fruit, but all I could find was some old tea in a pitcher and a few jiqui fruits. I think I?ll move to Alderaan.

    On the way to class I forgot my book bag so I had to go back and get it, and by the time I got it and got to class I was late and Master Rajane scolded me for not being on time and promised to let my master know about it. I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

    During class I had to read my essay aloud and Master Rajane liked Tahl?s essay better than mine.

    At astronavigation class I messed up the simulator so badly that it had to be reset and reprogrammed. Who needs to fly? It?s dangerous anyway. At quantum mathematics I forgot part of my assignment back in the apartment that I share with my master. I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good very bad day.

    I could tell because Kyran was mad at me for forgetting to meet him for lunch with Devin. I told him that it was an accident. He said next time he would go with Devin without me since I forgot.

    I hope you get sent to Hoth, I said to Kyran. I hope when you get a double-layered sweet snow cone the sweet snow part falls off the cone and lands on Hoth.

    Kyran had dewback ribs with extra sauce for lunch in the cafeteria and Devin had dewback roast. Tahl had dewback ribs too but with no sauce cause she doesn't like it. Guess who didn?t get there in time to get any lunch?

    It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

    That?s what it was because I had to go to the Healers for my yearly exam and they poked me with a needle. I hate needles. Come back next week, Chief Healer Han?yaie said, to donate blood. Next week, I said, I?m going to Alderaan.

    On the way back to my apartment the lift tube door closed on my foot while I was waiting for Master Dooku to get out of his Council meeting. N?hirik punched me in the face when I tripped over his bag in the hall and when I punched him back Master Dooku came out along with several of the Council members behind him and scolded me for fighting.

    I am having a terrible, horrible, no good very bad day, I told everyone. Nobody even answered.

    So then I went with Master Dooku to get new boots and there was a mix up in the sizes and color, the Jedi Master in charge said. We don?t have your padawan?s size in brown right now, said the man. Master Dooku made me take home a pair of bright pink ones instead, but he can?t make me wear them.

    When we stopped to see Master Koth at his desk before another Council meeting, Master Dooku told me not to play with Yoda?s gimmer stick that he had hidden, but I forgot. He also said to be very careful about the stuff on his desk and I was as careful as could be except for my arms. Master Koth said please don?t visit him anymore at his office.

    It was a terrible, horrible, no
  2. Durhelediel Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2004
    star 3
    Very cute. I know you've had this idea for quite a while now. You've pulled it off very well, right mood and everything. Very well done, Master. See, you didn't need your padawan's assistance on this afterall. :}
  3. JediVeloJinn Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 23, 2003
    star 1
    Layren, that was too funny. I really loved it, even as I felt bad for Qui. By the time I got to: I am having a terrible, horrible, no good very bad day, I told everyone. Nobody even answered., I was laughing out loud. It's exactly how I feel sometimes.

    Maybe the reason that it's so funny is because I have bad days too, when I'm doomed from the start (probably because I haven't slept enough, due to reading fanfic). Although I must say that mine don't even come close to Qui's experience. Pink boots!!! :D

    I really loved the way that you narrated it. It was so realistic. Exactly the way that a child would view the events. And the way he kept saying to himself that It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

    And the part about Qui burning the flimsiplast that his homework was on. You didn't say it, but I imagined that Dooku might have been a little suspicious that it just so happened to be his homework.

    Wonderful, Layren. I'm so glad that you wrote it and shared it with us.



    Velo
  4. Kynstar Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2004
    star 5
    Yeah she postee it!! :D Great job! Now I remember this story ;) well the one ya based it off of hehehehehe

    Great job! hehe I love the ending about Dooku agreeing with him! Very cute indeed!! :D hehehe don't play with the gimmer stick that he had hidden... Master Dooku hid Yoda's stick? LMAO!! hehehehe
  5. red rose knight Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 3, 2001
    star 4
    Poor Qui-Gon, everything he touched just went terribly wrong. [face_laugh] That was really funny and I could just see him staring in horror at the pink boots. That was very enjoyable.
  6. Layren Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    star 5
    Durhelediel Thank you padawan you were right but you know how skittish I get about working alone with my writing lol. Especially since I'd never written a humor thing alone..Glad you liked it!

    JediVeloJinn [face_blush] Thanks so much for the very nice review :D As for the pink boots that was Greencat's suggestion and I thought it was really cute so I kept it. The burnt flimsiplast was based on actual real live events :D My Father spilled water on a section of the newspaper my mother needed to read and so mom remembering something about microwaves being good places to dry things off decided to stick it in there and see if that would help. My sister turned the microwave off and Dad opened the door and the paper burst into flame [face_laugh] so Dad very hurriedly tossed it outside and now there's a singed patch of grass on the front yard. I wasn't actually there but when my mom told me the story it was just so good that I had to use it ;)

    As for the narration that's how the original book was written so I thought it was a good idea to be kind of true to the original format ;) Very glad you liked it!


    Kynstar Yeah see I told you it was based off the other one lol. I'm glad you liked it and thanks for the reviews both here and on ff.net

    Red_Rose_Knight YAY! I sucked in a mod!! :D See I can write non-angsty fics ;) Very glad you enjoyed it! Thanks very much for the review it really made my day ;) Hehehee you think Qui is actually going to wear those boots? [face_mischief]
  7. Vampi_Digitalwytch Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Apr 11, 2004
    star 3
    Considering my son brought home the Viorst book from the school library today, I took that as a sign to get the mole out of my tookas and read this fic.

    Layren, you've managed to do something I have trouble with and that's write from a child's perspective. As much as I try, I flub it somehow. I also liked to see Dooku not being portrayed as mostly evil, after all it was only when he was sick and tired of how the Sentate was and how the Jedi werre following suit that his perspective changed.

    Excellent job. :)
  8. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    This was adorable! I love a young Qui-Gon. Not too many people write him at all. Poor kid - nothing went right for him at all.

    Great job!
  9. ca_tron Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 6, 2002
    star 3
    Very cute. It made go and re-read the orignal and I felt like a child again. Thanks. I really needed it.
  10. greencat336 Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 27, 2001
    star 5
    Very, very entertaining! Well done. :)

  11. AnakinsHeir Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 2, 2004
    star 3
    This was adorable! It brought childhood memories rushing back, which is a good thing! You did a great job with this, it was definitely SW but the childhood classic was interwoven flawlessly. Wonderful job!
  12. Layren Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    star 5
    Vampi Thank your son for me for bringing the book home ;) I had had this idea for awhile and I'd been wanting to make it work but coming up with the star wars equivalents for all the earth terms like microwave and ice cream were the hardest parts lol.

    I've always been around kids ever since I was one myself lol. I did a LOT of babysitting growing up and I worked in daycares when I was old enough to get a job. Being around kids so often and watching them interact gave me lots of inspiration. I'm glad you liked it!

    Diane No not too many write young Qui-Gon ;) I had briefly considered doing this with young Obi-Wan instead but I figured Qui needed some attention :)

    ca_tron Very glad you enjoyed it! That book was one of my favorites when I was little and when I could afford the book in college I bought myself a copy to read during finals when everything was out-of-control. Now I don't have finals since I'm not in school anymore but it still makes good therapy ;)


    Greencat Hey you! Glad you got around to reading it! Thanks for the suggestions and the pink boots seem to be a big hit ;)

    AnakinsHeir Glad you liked it! I sat with the book on my lap for about an hour and a half trying to figure out how to make it all come out lol with my hubby looking at me the whole time thinking I'm nuts..
  13. Jemmiah Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2000
    star 5
    Loveditloveditlovedit! :D :D :D
  14. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Priceless, absolutely priceless! It's a horrible, no-good rainy day here so I needed something like this! Superb work!
  15. Knight_Dilettante Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 24, 2002
    star 4
    I too loved this. I liked the way the narration moved too, though I did not recognize it, not having read the book. I will have to look for this book for my daughter. Although, I think perhaps I want to read it first, lest it give her ideas. :D

    I can imagine Qui-Gon devoting considerable effort to coming up with a way to render the pink boots either wearable (several trips down to the dye rooms where all the lovely misty-grey wool cloaks are dyed dark brown for example) with, predictably less than successful results. And then him giving up and trying to "accidently" lose them. And of course, everyone knows that the pink boots with the brown splotches are Qui-Gon's so they make it home every time.

    And it was really nice to see a nice Dooku.

    I soooo identified with his day. It was rather like several of mine lately. 'Cept no one has tried to make me wear pink boots. Looks around fiercely. And they better not now either.

    KD
  16. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Yay! That's always been my favorite picture book and now I can picture it with SW! So cute and funny!
  17. Jedikma Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 4
    I LOVED this! Of course, I read this book to my kids years ago and adored it and I love how you used it here. I think every kid has one of those days just like this. ;)

    Just wonderful!

    I also like how you wrote young Qui-Gon. Wish I could just give him a big hug! ;)

    ~ Jedikma :)
  18. _JM_ Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 26, 2001
    star 4
    Never read the original story but I enjoyed this a lot.
  19. female_obi_wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 1, 2002
    star 3
    I've never read the original either, but that was funny. [face_laugh]

    Pink boots...
  20. Layren Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    star 5
    Wow I am totally amazed I didn't expect it to get this much reader response considering it was my first try. Lol.

    Jemmiah Very glad you liked it!

    VaderLVR64 Rainy days are very good for reading. Nothing better than curling up with a good story on a rainy day ;) Glad you enjoyed it!


    Knight_Dilettante



    I can imagine Qui-Gon devoting considerable effort to coming up with a way to render the pink boots either wearable (several trips down to the dye rooms where all the lovely misty-grey wool cloaks are dyed dark brown for example) with, predictably less than successful results. And then him giving up and trying to "accidently" lose them. And of course, everyone knows that the pink boots with the brown splotches are Qui-Gon's so they make it home every time.


    LOLOLOL. Perhaps I should do a sequel on Qui-Gon trying to get rid of nasty pink boots lolol That's great! I'm very glad you liked Dooku being nice ;) I don't see him being really mean or anything although I do see him being strict. I think he probably has a good relationship with Qui-Gon. Never mind what the books say ;)

    DarthIshtar That was my favorite one too :D Heheheee. Glad you enjoyed it! My other favorite picture book was one called The Paper Bag Princess :D


    Jedikma Kids aren't the only ones with really bad days :D


    I also like how you wrote young Qui-Gon. Wish I could just give him a big hug!


    Well Qui-Gon is my favorite character but I've never tried to write him this young before. This was also my first try at writing Dooku by myself. Lots of firsts here so I'm glad it was a sucess :D



    JM Well now you should read the original :D It's really cute and good for a laugh on a hard day ;)


    Female_Obi_Wan Hey you! Glad you liked it .. yes the pink boots seem to be a success. In the original story the kid went to buy sneakers with his two brothers so I had to come up with something that was the equivalent. He wanted red sneakers with blue stripes but they were all sold out while his brothers got the shoes they wanted ;) He had to wear plain old white shoes. Poor Alexander.. at least they weren't pink [face_devil]
  21. NarundiJedi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 2001
    star 6
    Wow, reading this made me remember all the parts and pictures from the original book! You wrote a most excellent parody!

    Of course, I liked the parts you added in as an extra touch. My favorite part was this, for some odd reason:

    My shower was freezing since Master Dooku used all the hot water.

    I can just see poor Qui shivering while Master Dooku sits by, all warm and toasty with a smile on his face. :p

    I'm glad I finally got around to reading this! It really is a great piece! :)

    Jae Angel
  22. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    Must agree with all before me, it was wonderful.
  23. 1-Ani-Obi-luvr Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 24, 2004
    This was great! That Dooku has always been a pain in the butt : )

    My shower was freezing since Master Dooku used all the hot water.

    Great job!
  24. Tanith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2003
    star 1
    I agree with the comments above.

    Love the way it was written - just the way a kid would write it in his diary.
  25. Layren Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    star 5
    Hi everyone! Glad you've enjoyed it so far! I've been pondering doing a sequel to this little fic if there's enough interest in it. Thanks everyone SO Much for your reviews. It truly does mean a lot.


    Narundi Thanks so very much for the kind words! I'm glad you liked it :D I'd had the idea for awhile but making it actually work was another matter entirely.. working on sequel now :D


    Healer_Leona Very glad you enjoyed it!

    1-Ani-Obi-Luvr hehehehe in the original book the kid's bath was too hot. I thought that with a Master/Padawan team it'd be more likely that Master Dooku would use all the hot water rather than having a shower that was too hot ;)

    Tanith Glad you liked it!
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