Beyond - Legends Quiet -- K/J, Second Person

I decided that I wanted to try another second person challenge, since my first (Wondering) came out rather different than what I had planned.

So, in apology for being gone for so long....

Disclaimer: Still not mine.

---
Quiet
---

You?ve never seen them quiet before.

-

You?ve seen them laughing before. You?ve heard how her light laughter will float over his lower chuckles. You?ve seen her brown eyes crinkle with mirth, and you?ve watched his green eyes light and dance with amusement. When they laugh together, it seems balanced to you? her laughter infectious and easy, his harder to call forth but just as genuine. Yes, you?ve seen them laughing together before.

You?ve seen them bantering before. You remember their eyes sparkling back and forth as though they were laughing when they were actually insulting each other. Flirting, your father calls it, with that smirk of his firmly in place. You?re not sure if you can disagree with his pronouncement. You?ve heard the witticisms and stinging barbs that they exchange so rapidly, and you suppose that they could be considered strange terms of endearment. Yes, you?ve seen them bantering together before.

You?ve seen them arguing before. You?ve watched them shout insults that are the same as the ones they use in the banter, and you remember realizing that the insults seemed to sound different in an argument. You?ve watched his eyes harden as she flings his shortcomings in his face in temper; you?ve watched her eyes fill with unshed tears as he methodically tears her apart with familiar cruel words. Yes, you?ve seen them arguing together before.

You?ve seen them apologizing before. You?ve watched them hesitantly approach each other to offer words of guilt and apology. You?ve seen them somberly proffer amends for their harsh words, and you?ve recognized the relief in their eyes when they agree to forget past transgressions. Sometimes they take turns, and you see one apologizing for wounding the other, but most of the time it seems to you that they lost their tempers together, so that both feel the need to make reparation. Yes, you?ve seen them apologizing together before.

You?ve seen them plotting before. You?ve come to recognize the signs, mainly out of a strong sense of self-preservation. You know some poor fool is going to face their combined abilities when they spend time talking in whispers in dimly lit corners. You?ve seen how their eyes flit from person to person as they plan, and you recognized the all-too-pleased smile on her face and the smug half-grin on his as they select their next victim. You?ve been on the receiving end of one too many of their tricks for you not to recognize those expressions. Yes, you?ve seen them plotting together before.

You?ve seen them debating before. You?ve watched them take a topic? any topic, serious or frivolous? and pick it apart. You?ve seen them take sides and question things. You can recognize the measuring weight of her gaze as she ponders the problems of the galaxy; you understand why his eyes grow distant with thought when they debate the nature of temptation. You don?t know why neither of them can seriously discuss the Council without laughing. You don?t know why they always seem to start out defending opposite sides, switch viewpoints with each other halfway through, argue the other?s side for a bit, and then wind up somehow agreeing with each other in the end. Yes, you?ve seen them debating together before.

You?ve seen them bragging before. You actually enjoy listening to them as they stretch the truth in an effort to outdo each other, because to you, the competition is just a friendlier version of their banter, lighthearted and harmless. You enjoy it more when you see the two of them working together to outdo someone else. Sometimes you know that they?re lying through their teeth and over-exaggerating, and sometimes you know that they?re telling the truth about the odds

 

You find him... hard... to write...

Jace says you have him perfect.
Jace absolutely loves this, because it has Jacen and K/J.


Yes, I love it too.

Second-person is such an interesting way of writing... it's cool, and it's really hard to do, but once again, you've just written a brilliant fic.

Oh, it's so good~
^^

 

*jaw drops, hitting the floor, and falling through it to some unknown depth below*

That. Was. Amazing. It's really a good thing you like to challenge yourself because you come up with these wonderful little masterpieces.

All your descriptions were spot-on...perfect. I really like the way you had it from Jacen's POV. I'd quote some things, but I'd just end up re-posting this.

The best part, though, of course, is the Quiet part, when Jacen suddenly figures things out and realizes it isn't as bad as he thinks it should have been.

YAY.

~Abby~

 

Do you have ANY idea how jealous I am of your writing?


This was great. Was it, dare I ask, inspired by something?


Dana

 

Wow

 

yes, i second that 'wow'!

that was really good! i'm totally impressed

 

Woah.

That was...

It..

::Sigh::


Beautiful

 

Beautiful!...I really felt myself getting quiet at that 'quiet' part when Jacen sees them touching. **sigh** Tingles just ran up and down my spine!

 

Wow! That was powerful. Saber I don't get how you always manage to make these masterpieces. They're all sooo wonderful! This was no exception. Great beyond measure. Truly one to add to my pile to stories to re-read.

Fireyforce

 

Wow! This was excellent! Very nice little descriptions of K/J when they are together. When Jacen realizes that the quiet moment he witnessed fits right along with the others, I sighed because it was just that great. This is a great piece of work!

Ambyr-Rose

 

Absolutely brilliant! Your work continues to amaze, Saber ? especially when you use different POVs! I apologise for not commenting on your fan fiction for a while. I have to play catch up now.

I agree with you about Jacen. He?s a tough cookie. I?m having difficulty trying to write a short piece with him. I don?t know Jacen well, but I think you?ve got a great handle over the character.

Amsie

 

dj: Jace liked it, eh? That's good to know. And yeah, second person is a bit weird. That's why I had to play with it.

Abby: Thanks! I'm a bit amazed at it myself, actually-- description usually isn't my strong point.

Dana: If you're jealous of me and I'm jealous of you, then does it all balance out in the cosmic scheme of things?

JainaDurron: Thanks!

MegDurron: Thanks!

MiraxJade: Thanks! Stream of consciousness reply? Cool.

valsolo: ooh, tingles, eh? Thanks! I'm glad to see you're back into K/J yourself, btw...

Fireyforce: heh, I make these "masterpieces" by hating work and refusing to think about it. Thanks!

Ambyr-Rose: Yes, I was trying for the whole closure everything-fits-together type of ending. I'm glad you thought that it worked!

Amsie: Woohoo, welcome back! Jacen is quite the pain to write, isn't he? Glad you thought I managed him decently, and I hope I get to see what you're going to be doing with him soon...

-Saber

 

Wow. That was wonderful.

And I agree; one of the reasons I like it so much is because it has K/J and Jacen!

Second person is so challenging to write in; you did a wonderful job. I love that some of the things you write, I can tell you're writing them to stretch yourself as a writer. That's awesome.

That was one of my favorite examinations of their relationship I've ever read. Kudos!

 

That was very well written, perfect portrayal of Jacen. Beautiful, yet simple. Liked the fact that there were no words. Great job!!

Flame

 

::Applauds::

Here, have a trophy or a cookie, take your pick.

 

I don't know how you keep chugging all these wonderful viggies out Saber, but each one is better than the last

I liked that it was from jacen's POV...we don't see his reaction very much to their relationship and I think you handeled it just right

Bravo!

EJ

 

Great post, Saber Sometimes the style seemed a little too repetetive, but I really enjoyed it nonetheless -- and the "quiet" part was amazing.

~TJF

 

.. that was.. beeeautiful.. *stunned silence*

*slowly starts to smile* truly beautiful.. *tries unsuccessfully to wipe the wide smile off her face*

 

One word: Beautiful.

The way you've portrayed Jacen - as a part of Jaina's life, but not her 'everything' - is so accurate on so many levels. They're not the conventional do-everything-together twins, they have non-mutual friends and interests, and you've captured that dynamic perfectly. As for the K/J... I absolutely loved how you did it. Subtle, sweet...not overly mushy or sappy. Excellent stuff.

-JSD

 

Awwwwwwww! Simply beautiful You could really pick up on the moods and emotions

~Goddess Jaina~

 

You really managed to convey what they were feeling through Jacen. Really neat secondperson fic. Lovely.