Before Repost: A Mission Gone Wrong. Qui, Obi. A rescue mission goes horribly awry..

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Valairy Scot, Jun 19, 2009.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
Moderators: Briannakin, mavjade
  1. Valairy Scot Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    Title: A Mission Gone Wrong
    Author(s): Valairy_Scot
    Timeframe: JA
    Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Qui-Gon Jinn
    Genre: Vignette
    Note: For those who read this before, I have off and on worked on a "real story" for this but my "outside muse" is caught up in DRL and can't help with some plotting ideas to actually move it forward. I do have about 100 pages, though. I may get Mission of Mercy up in the fall of 09.


    A Mission Gone Wrong


    I was the first to arrive, staring pensively at the sun getting ready to drop over the horizon. This mission was not going as planned, something was terribly wrong. If help didn't arrive soon, two rescuers would soon be added to the death toll, for soon, there would be no life left on this planet. It was that dire a situation.

    I heard soft, slow, dragging footsteps, and knew Obi-Wan had arrived. He came and stood by my side, silent. There was no need for words between us; we both knew what we faced.

    We knew there was nothing more we could do, but still we tried, traipsing through the countryside, seeking life and seeking to give hope. But both were now in short supply.

    I turned and looked at his face.

    ?Oh, Obi-Wan,? I sighed when I saw his weary face. He was bone-achingly tired, and his eyes had seen too much this day. So had mine. This day, as well as all the ones that had preceded it since we had landed on this planet. We spent our days apart, doing what we could, joining up at sunset when no more could be done.

    ?Eat something and then rest,? I said softly. He sat, but made no move towards the concentrated rations in his belt. ?Padawan, you need to eat something. Eat.?

    Normally, any such repetition of an order, even couched as a request, would have him instantly obeying me, so I was surprised that he made no move. He sat, more falling than sitting, and looked up at me with empty eyes and simply shook his head. He wasn?t defying me ? he never did ? he just couldn?t comply. At first I thought he was just too tired, but then I looked at his face again and saw the hint of an apologetic grin. Sudden realization hit me.

    ?You gave the last of your food away!? I accused him, and he nodded slowly. I wanted to be exasperated with him, but pride warred with anxiety. He had seen someone in greater need, and had reacted. It was the compassionate thing to do, if not the correct thing. We were, however, down to the last of our own reserves, so all he had done was hasten the inevitable end by just a few days.

    As had I.

    I squatted by his side, tilted his chin upright with a finger and looked deep into his eyes, those changeable blue-gray eyes, now more gray than blue with fatigue and hunger.

    ?I understand, Obi-Wan,? I said softly. ?Your connection to the Living Force leaves something to be desired, I often think, but I have never doubted your compassion towards others.

    His eyes shone at me, and I smiled, somehow. I was worried, very worried, for this planet was dying from hunger and malnutrition. Help was supposed to be on the way, but hadn?t arrived yet. Obi-Wan and I had been sent ahead with a transport full of food to distribute and asked to survey the countryside. When the Senate supplies arrived, we would be there to direct its distribution to the most needy and oversee order.

    The aid was supposed to have arrived a month ago. Obi-Wan and I had immediately rationed our concentrated rations; it should have kept us going for up to six months, if we were very careful. Now we were both out ? not for lack of care, but because we didn?t lack for caring. We had seen too many beings in dire straits, and how could we hang onto our food cubes when beings were dying around us.

    Now we were victims, too.

    I sat down by Obi-Wan and put an arm around his shoulder. He leaned his head against my shoulder and closed his eyes. We sat there quietly, my mind recalling the first time Obi-Wan had been exposed to terrible suffering, something no boy so young should have to face willingly. He had done what nee
  2. KELIA Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 26, 2005
    star 6
    :_|:_|:_|:_|

    What a brutal beginning.

    I'm not surprised Qui and Obi would give away all the food they had.

    I would leave our fate to the Force, for I had lost my faith in the politicians.

    Can't say that I blame him. I just hope help arrives in time.

    Heartbreaking, but wonderful beginning

    =D= =D= =D= =D=
  3. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4
    You do love torturing Obi-Wan don't you.o_O

    Obi-Wan had stroked the baby's cheek with a finger and when the baby started to suck on it, I could see Obi-Wan just absolutely flinch. I saw the anguish in his eyes, but he held back the tears that I knew had to be seeking release.

    The baby hiccoughed once, and we all knew the child was dying in his arms. Obi-Wan had started to croon a soft lullaby then, seeking to ease the baby's passage with the only thing he could offer - his comfort. His voice cracked and tore with emotion, but he sang softly, sending that little spirit off to the Force accompanied by love.


    How horrible for Obi-Wan to hold the dying baby, poor boy.:_|

    Please don't tell me that Obi dies. I couldn't bear it.:_|

    Although I think I have to know so I can prepare myself.:_|

    Good (sad) start.=D=
  4. earlybird-obi-wan Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 21, 2006
    star 6
    Poor Obi:_|:_|:_| let him be safe or let some one save them

    Great beginning=D==D=
  5. Valairy Scot Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    A quick note - this is NOT the beginning of Mission of Mercy. This is a standalone vignette that INSPIRED the story to come. It has a beginning and an end, but the middle and the plot needs work.
  6. Raphire Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 19, 2008
    star 4
    That poor poor baby!:_|

    I hope Obi-wan doesn't Die!

    This is a really good story tho :_| =D=
  7. charie Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Oct 6, 2007
    star 2
    Heart breaking!:_| I would love to read Mission of Mercy!!! I'll be waiting. Thanks you for such a moving vignette.=D=
Moderators: Briannakin, mavjade
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.