Rethink and Reflect Author: smuggler_vola (known as Epic Duck on fanfiction.net) Characters: Elan Sel'Sabagno, his parents who I made up.Summary: Elan Sel'Sabagno went home and rethought his life...as well as reflecting on where everything went wrong.Disclaimer: I didn't exist when Star Wars was created, do you honestly think I own it? Coruscant's many lights and flashing signs greeted me, as well as speeders and ships zipping by in the airlanes above. Slipping into the waves, or maybe ocean is a better description, of people I made my way through the busy streets. No matter what time of day it was, Coruscant was the city/planet that never ever slept.The old wooden stairs creaked as I trekked up them to the filth-hole of an apartment I stayed in. It wasn't much, a bed, couple of chairs, and a small table in here served as my room for the last...how long had it been? While I would have liked to say only a few months or a year I had been selling Death Sticks, I knew it not to be true.Dropping out of school...running away...in desperate need of money...the thoughts and memories came rushing into my mind all at once. But that still wasn't it, I needed to go deeper. Suddenly, a light bulb lit up in my head (as the lights above my head flickered and one burned out, I might add).oOoA rare breeze blew across the planet as a young woman pulled her jacket closed just a little more. She walked at a slower pace so her son could keep up. He was such a little thing, wide, curious brown eyes and a knack for getting into trouble, a trait his mother was certain ran in the family.If you didn't pay close enough attention, you might mistake them for Humans. They were both actually of the Balosar species, identified easily by their antennapalps on their heads. They walked quietly to their house, the woman having just picked her son up from school.The father was delighted to see his son, Elan, and wife, Sela, approaching. Or at least Elan.“Dad!” the seven-year-old boy shouted as he ran over, followed by his mother Sela walking in after.“How's the shop doin'?” Sela asked, walking over. She brushed as stray stand of her black hair out of her face, meeting his gaze with a look of ferocity in her eyes.The 'shop' was just a coverup. She had discovered only days ago that all he did was gamble and drink at the Outlander, while she worked all day and sometimes all night to make enough money to support their family.“Oh, you know...” nervousness was evident in his tone, “Say, Elan, why don't you go play out back with your toy ship.”Not comprehending what was going on, Elan smiled, “Ok.”The second the back door closed, the only thing to be heard in the Sel'Sebagno household was screaming and the sound of objects breaking and glass being shattered.Until everything went silent.oOoPolice droids and officers were on the scene in 15 minutes, having gotten several noise complaints from neighbors. The sight the greeted them upon arrival was nothing short of horrifying.Blood splattered on the wall, on the floor, tables and chairs overturned, shattered glass spread out across the room. Not to mention the body of a man, Jaelan Sel'Sebagano, cod and lifeless on the ground. Nearby was none other than his wife Sela, as dead as he and with her fingers curled around a balster, one finger still on the trigger.After collecting and examining the evidence, they were able to determine what had happened and that, because he had no other relatives on Coruscant, that Elan would be sent to an orphanage.oOoThat place was horrible, I hated it. And I hated school even more.The other kids always picked on me, if they weren't down right afraid of me, because of what my mother did. I never really understood why she did it, I know what Dad did was bad, but they could have worked it out!After a while, about 10 years, I just couldn't take it anymore. The endless teasing and name calling, it just got to be too much. So I left. Without any warning, I got out of bed one night, packed my bag, and I climbed out the window.Running away made me feel so...free. No one could tell me what to do, I could live my own life and make my own mistakes, nothing was going to stop me.I had found a place to stay after a few hours of wandering around, the same place I'm staying in now.One day someone offered me a death stick, and like a fool I had accepted it. That stuff is addictive, let me tell ya. So I went back and got another. And another. And then another. I remembered in medical school all off the ill health effects of it, but it didn't affect me so I didn't kriffing care.Maybe I had been thinking of keeping them for myself, maybe it was just the idea of having credits to spend, but I went to the docks and 'borrowed' a shipment of death sticks a few weeks later. That's when I began selling them at the Outlander, if only I had known that that would be my life for the next 10 years.But not anymore. This is not the life I want, this was never the life I wanted. I'm enrolling back in medical school and I'm going to help cure people of their own addictions.As I sat in my apartment, I did something I hadn't done in so long.I smiled.