~~Screaming for silence ~~ A Jaina vignette

Disclaimer: I don?t own Star Wars or the characters. It belongs to the great GL. I?m not making money of this, I?m writing for fun! A part of a song, shown below, also doesn?t belong to me. Its part of a song called Deliver me by Sarah Brightman

Timeframe: New Jedi Order, a few years after Traitor. Spoilers up to Traitor

Rating: PG-13

Author?s note: This is a very dark vignette. If you don?t like the idea of suicide or dark story?s, in this case very dark stories, I suggest you turn around now This is the product a day full of headache?s and blues I just couldn?t help myself.



Screaming for silence


She had an olive brown skin, dark long hair sprawled around her head like a crown,
golden earrings in her ears and part of a broken amfistaff sticking out of her abdomen.
Her soul had left her body for days now, but her presence was still felt when you looked at her and remembered what she once was, a little girl full of live. A shadow of what she?s now. Now she was one of the many, many nameless dead beings lying dead in a field. Killed by the Yuuzhan Vong because they were useless to them.


She was in contrast with the young woman, standing on the cliff that wasn?t far from where the little girl was lying, nameless in the field of dead. Beautiful purple mountains hovering high above the field and the cliff. The New Republic soldiers were laying the dead in large black body bags, giving them a number. They didn?t bother to look at the young woman who stood on the edge of the cliff, a cliff that led to rocks and a light green sea. Waves crashed against the cliffs, like they could push the cliff aside.


I looked from the sea and the mountains to the soldiers working in the field. I recognized the looks on their faces, even on alien faces. It was not hard; it was a look I carried myself. It's an empty look, a look that closed the scene before them of. Acting automatically. One that said we are beyond felling pain. Many had, like me, built a wall around themselves. An empty look, a look that closed the scene before them of. Acting automatically. One that said we are beyond feeling pain. Many had, like me, built a wall around themselves to keep emotions out.


I know you are wondering who I am. I will tell you. I?m Jaina Solo, captain Jaina Solo actually, but that doesn?t matter anymore. Once I had a large family. But they are like the girl in the field, a shadow of what they once were. When they died, killed by the Yuuzhan Vong, a part of me died with them. With their deaths I entered a new era in my life. Since then I can?t stop falling, everywhere I go I hear their voices, not only of my family, but also the voices of my friends. My best friend and lover Kyp. Jag, once my lover then my friend. Wedge, my superior officer.


The wind played with my hair while I watched soldiers work. One looked up from his work, putting a Bothan male in a black body bag and tagging the body with a number, and looked at me. It took him a moment to recognize me, but when he did a questioning look crawled on his face. He left his work and walked towards me. Probably to stop me from what I was planning. But I couldn?t let him. ?You cannot save me,? I said out loud, causing several more people to look up from their work, ?I am beyond saving.?
I know you won?t agree with me, taking my own life. But it?s the only thing left for me to do. Once I would have said we choose our own destiny, but when the Yuuzhan Vong entered this galaxy, mine was chosen for me. But destiny or no destiny, I will not die at the Yuuzhan Vong?s hand. I will not give them that pleasure. Only I decide how and when I die.


After the words left my mouth, I let myself fall from the cliff into the darkness of the green sea below me. With that action the chains of destiny let me fall from their grip.


My soul screamed for the silence, but before I reached that silence memories flashed in my mind. Jacen and me. Anakin and me. Me and my brothers, playing.

 

I loved it! Sad, very very sad!

 

I know... It was supposed to be (<- this is becoming my favo icon see!)

BTW thanks for reading

 

Good Kyp is dead that's a clue it's a good fic

I love dark fics and this one is fantastic.

It's well written and you should keep up writing fan fics

 

Hela holo! Nice to see you here

Ahum, Kyp is my FAVORITE character, but it couldn't be helped...

Why thank you T!

And I will

 

You did say it was dark. That it was; well done. Melikes.

 

Oh Wow you really captured raw emotion in that story. Poor Jaina, i really hope it does not end up like that.

Jez

 

Zara_Rose - Thank you! Dark, very dark...

Jez_3-14159265358979 - Yeah, I always pick Jaina to torture But thanks for reading. I hope she survives too

 

YOU KILLED JAINA! but i suppose it ws part of the story....great plot, btw, but very sad....and kyp and jaina were together! but you killed jaina....hmmm....well-written and very touching.

-JSD

 

Shadow . . . wow . . . wow . . . dang!

awesome post! you captured the emotion just right . . .

amazing

 

JSD - I know. I'm the Queen of Jaina torture. I killed her. But though it doesn't show in the story, Kyp's dead to. Thanks!

MJ - Thank you!

 

Just upping this before I go nightie night night
Well not nighty night night, more like watching LotR...

 

great post. thats really sad. poor jaina.

 

Sweet fic!

Yes, you are the queen of Jaina torture!

 

JainaJag00 - Thanks! I know!

_Tenel_Ka_ - Sweet Well that is new If you say so And thanks!

 

UP!!!

 

Goodness, you killed Jaina! I've never seen that happen before. Very interesting. I like it. Her emotions were very well done. Dark and depressing. Poor girl. Well, that's what happens when you date Kyp. Teehee.

 

LadyMairead - I know! Thanks!

 

Uhm...

can you guess???

UPsidosie!!!!!!!!

 

Very dark, excellently written, though i still can't believe u killed her.... although it fit really well into the story. awesome.

 

Wow!!! Are you reading all my fic? Thanks!

 

okay, um, I read this on FF.net, but let me recap what happened to me when I DID....

*sits at her computer in shock, jaw locked in confusion*

man!! This was so... so.... so... well, you know, DARK! But it was absolutely brilliant.

Except for the killing Kyp and Jaina of course... Jag I don't mind at all...

 

[face_shocked] I know it's dark...but not that dark, is it?

Well anyway, with that kind of reaction it means I did something right

 

this is.... wow. um.... yeah, it's.... I'm having difficulty with the words here!!

Impact. yeah, lots of that... Don't jump!!



edit: I've gathered my thoughts now.

I can?t stop falling. I?ll find you after the fall.

that line is.... uh.... um.... I'm doing it again. Amazing writing.

 

LOL thanks. This is weird. Never thought people would actually like this. I was really depressed when i wrote this

Afer the fall. Well it's kinda a line from a song I heard at the time. I shoukd have put it in the disclaimer, but I couldn't remember whose song it was