Amph SEASON PREMIERE ALERT! Top Shot

Discussion in 'Community' started by Zaz, Aug 18, 2006.

  1. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    And if you live in a hole in the ground, here's some news!

    9-11PM
    ABC, TV-14-LV

    Season Premiere
    Lost

    "In case you missed that story in our midseason preview...it's a new season! Doc Jensen: Commence your salivating."
  2. Armenian_Jedi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 14, 2003
    star 7
  3. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    10-10:30PM
    BET

    Season Premiere
    Baldwin Hills

    "With spitfire teen queen Lor'Rena in Vegas, and fan favorite Staci subdued by pregnancy, the show's addictive venom seems to have dissipated. But with new drama simmering for glamazon Gerren (she won't leave Moriah alone!), season 3 looks like it'll get better, later. C+ ?Tanner Stransky"
  4. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    11-11:30PM
    IFC

    Season Premiere
    The IT Crowd

    "Moss gets revenge, and not with a computer virus."

  5. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    10-11PM
    HBO, TV-MA

    Season Premiere
    Real Time With Bill Maher

    "I bet Bill couldn't help but be worried that there wouldn't be anyone to make fun of when the country was all kumbayaing on the Mall. Thank you, Tom Daschle and Caroline Kennedy!"
  6. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    9-9:30PM
    TLC, TV-G

    Season Premiere
    18 Kids and Counting

    "Baby Jordyn-Grace Makiya comes home. Clearly, the Duggars are running out of good names, so maybe it's time for a vasectomy?"

    The Octomom is not alone. Why anyone would give these lunatics their own TV show is beyond me.

  7. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    10-11PM
    History, TV-PG

    Season Premiere
    Ax Men

    "Another season of timber cutters in Oregon. Which begs the question: If a series falls in the forest..."
  8. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    8-9PM
    The CW, TV-PG-DL

    Season Premiere
    Reaper

    "Back for its second season, Reaper has one thing left going for it: Ray Wise as the dapper Devil. Bret Harrison's Sam has been established as his son, but Sam must still do the same thing: capture souls to send to hell. The gimmick has grown lame, even if this week Sam does his task with an electric cattle prod. So is a new gimmick: Pal Sock (Tyler Labine) finds out he has a hotsy stepsister (Eriko Tamura), and he lusts after her. Doesn't that mean his soul should go to hell too? C ?Ken Tucker"
  9. Mastadge Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jun 4, 1999
    star 7
    Reaper's not the greatest show on TV, but that Tucker guy sounds like an idiot.
  10. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    It's shot in BC. A point in its favour.


    8-10PM
    The CW

    Must Watch of the Week Season Premiere
    America's Next Top Model

    "A group of 13 women assembles in Las Vegas. One has a disease that Americans know nothing about ? epilepsy! ? so they must be educated. Another is treated like she's so fat that Sully could land a plane on her behind. And a third is so cripplingly old (25) that it's truly amazing she still has control of her bodily functions. What could bring these gals together? A new cycle of America's Next Top Model. Aside from her usual go-tos, Tyra Banks still manages to uncover some wonderful loony tunes 12 cycles in, like Allison, whose biggest goal is to have the nosebleed that has eluded her all of her life...because she's obsessed with blood. After this Vegas episode, Tyra transports the contestants to the Republic of Gossip Girl (the Upper East Side of New York City). And with any luck, there'll be a crossover episode in which Allison's dream is fulfilled ? after Blair clocks her in the face. ?Henry Goldblatt"

    10-11PM
    Bravo

    Season Premiere
    Make Me a Supermodel

    "Unlike that other modeling show on tonight (see Must Watch), there is little pretense to this show being about much more than getting hot people in their underwear. What's wrong with that? Let's see: There are caricature-ish judges (one-named photographer Perou), predictable contestants (the homophobic ''I'm especially not gay'' Branden), and a runway show that insults viewers with clothing ''inspired by'' real designers. At least the breathtaking ballet dancer Sandhurst and bitchy beauty Salome are killer eye candy. B-"
  11. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    10-10:30PM
    E!, TV-14-L

    Season Premiere
    Keeping Up With the Kardashians

    "This reality series has always been a tad shallow ? that's part of its charm! ? but the season 3 premiere hits new lows in selfish behavior. After failing to complete her drunk-driving classes due to an Australian jaunt, Khloe is sentenced to jail time. Don't worry about Kardashians going all Oz: The poor little rich girl is released after only a few hours of hard time. And how does the Kardashian clan celebrate her freedom? A round of shots at lunch. This episode has been found guilty...of being obnoxious. C ?Tim Stack"
  12. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9

    8-10:02PM
    ABC

    Season Premiere
    Dancing With the Stars

    "Let's put odds on Karina and Maks' engagement imploding on live television."

  13. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9

    10:30-11PM
    TBS, TV-14

    Season Premiere
    My Boys

    "I don't want to spoil matters by saying too much about Bobby's wedding, but the word fiasco is used. And not in a good way."
  14. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    9-10PM
    Showtime, TV-MA

    Season Premiere
    The Tudors

    "Henry VIII marries his third wife, Jane Seymour, whom I seem to recall he divorced, beheaded, or chopped up and fed to his pet wolverines. Want to hear something funny? I have a history degree."

    So do I, and she died in childbirth, nimrod.


    9-10PM
    HBO, TV-MA

    Season Premiere
    In Treatment

    "Hope Davis joins the cast as a lawyer. Which makes sense, given that they're the only ones who can afford a shrink these days."

  15. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    9-11PM
    Discovery, TV-PG

    Season Premiere
    Mythbusters

    "Are movie car chases real or fake? I could answer that in less than two hours."
  16. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    Season Premiere
    Tracey Ullman's State of the Union
    B

    "Now that we've become accustomed to daily flayings from Stewart, Colbert & Co., Ullman's take on American absurdity feels oddly gentle despite its topicality. Still, the shape-shifting British comedian's characters have a loopy, if intermittent, charm. Among the best: pharmacist Padma Perkesh, who punctuates her pill dispensing with Bollywood-style dances, and former First Lady Laura Bush, played here as a chain-smoking Southern belle. Ullman's Celine Dion, however, looks disturbingly like Mister Rogers' Lady Elaine. ?Leah Greenblatt"
  17. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    10-11PM
    Animal Planet, TV-PG

    Series Debut
    Stranger Among Bears

    "Like the Melanie Griffith movie, but with bears instead of Hasidic Jews ? though both like salmon."
  18. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    7-8PM
    Nicktoons, TV-T7

    Series Debut
    Iron Man: Armored Adventures
    B+

    "The Iron Man of comic books and last year's blockbuster film is a grown man named Tony Stark, with a grown man's problems. He responsibly leads a global tech firm into the future, struggles with the siren lures of easy women and stiff booze, and occasionally pummels earthshaking bad guys. But in Nicktoons' new cartoon series, Tony is a teenage boy, coping with his billionaire father's mysterious death. What could've been a clunky retrograde reboot works surprisingly well, thanks to some smart writing and stellar CG butt-kickery. ?Marc Bernardin"
  19. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    8-10PM
    BBC America, TV-PG

    Series Debut
    The Apprentice UK

    "The Brit version of Donald Trump's show follows the same basic format, with 14 (noncelebrity) contestants trying not to get fired by billionaire Sir Alan Sugar. But what the show lacks is spice. Where are crazy Joan Rivers and feisty Annie Duke when you need 'em?" --Dalton Ross"
  20. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    9-10PM
    Discovery, TV-PG

    Series Debut
    Weaponizers

    "Ordinary vehicles are turned into weapons of destruction, with pyrotechnics and military weaponry. Um, does the White House know about this?"

  21. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9

    8-10PM
    Fox, TV-PG-DL

    Season Premiere Inside Look
    So You Think You Can Dance

    "Lace up those boogie shoes: Season 5 boasts ''a phenomenal change in standards,'' according to exec producer/judge Nigel Lythgoe. He won't dish about the finalists, but Lythgoe hints that the female dancers are the ones to watch ? or ogle, really. ''The girls are really beautiful.... [They] almost could be models,'' he says. Is loudmouth judge Mary Murphy as enthusiastic? If Lythgoe's hearing is any indication, we'd say yes. ''I'm holding my telephone to my right ear,'' he jokes, ''because my left ear is basically shot.'' ?Kate Ward"


    10-11PM
    A&E, TV-14

    Season Premiere
    Crime 360

    "Apparently, it's easier to solve crimes if you look at them from all different angles. Actually, in that way, it's a lot like choosing an outfit."

  22. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    9-10PM
    TLC, TV-PG

    Season Premiere
    What Not to Wear
    C-
    "An utterly unenthused (and, fittingly, former Curb Your Enthusiasm guest star) Mayim Bialik gets ''assaulted on all fronts'' by Stacy and Clinton for season 7's kickoff. The gurus criticize Blossom for being uncomfortable with her body, but she's really just uncomfortable with the show. ?Annie Barrett"
  23. Jag4Me Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 29, 2008
    star 6
    I'll admit it... I love this show and watch it all the time. Also, my hair stylist was trained by Nick Arrojo.:p
  24. Zaz Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 1998
    star 9
    They should do more men, though. The way some people dress is a crime.
  25. Jag4Me Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 29, 2008
    star 6
    I agree, and the few shows they've done with men are really fun to watch.