Shades of Gray -- NJO -- (links pg. 1)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by LadyMairead, Sep 13, 2002.

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  1. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
  2. Sache8 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 2000
    star 4
    Very nice descriptions!

    **claps**


    So..... when's he gonna get there? ;)
  3. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    ooh, Sache you'll have to wait and find out! :) Well, I'm in an exceptionally good mood because I just got a huge package from my mom with American candy and magazines and books! And she sent a SW book! She said she had no idea which one to send, so she just grabbed one, and it was Balance Point, which is good! So, in honor of my good mood, I'm posting the next part.
  4. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    Sorry these posts are short, but I'm new at this, obviously, so they will be getting longer. This one is for my mom, even though she won't be reading it...
    ---------------------------------

    Later, when she reflected on those minutes that she stood waiting in the docking bay, she failed to understand how she had stayed sane. She could not comprehend how she had kept a grasp on her mind when, denied the immediate pleasure of the experience she had waited so long for, all it had wanted to do was to leave her body and stay in that moment forever, exploring that gray limbo in which time had no meaning.

    Yet even when her whole soul yearned for the minutes to slip away and for the moment to arrive, a part of her had wanted to release her mind, and to follow it into the void, so that she could stay in that place forever. To stay, content with the knowledge that he was safe and would soon be home. To stay, and not have to face his pain, his possible disappointment. To not have to face him as he was now, most certainly changed.

    All of these thoughts and more filled the minutes as she waited, but not so fully as to fill the empty place that had so long been a part of her. It was an acute emptiness, and as much as she had tried to evade it, she had been unable to prevent her mind from exploring at least the most surface aspects of it.

    Sometimes, it was a thick, gray mist, a foul-smelling fog, in which she felt she would disappear if she wandered without caution. Other times, it was a burning ball of something hotter than flames, a supernova that had exploded inside her and threatened to consume her. But most times, it was a cold, hard block of ice that chilled her from the very core. She tried desperately to chip away at it, and sometimes suceeded, but day by day it grew colder and the ice spread, slowly but unmercifully, engulfing more and more of her.

    Yet now, as the minutes passed and the moment approached, the mist seemed to clear, the burning lessened, and the ice began to melt as the hands on her chrono continued to tick.

    And she waited.

    -----------------------------------
    Thoughts?? Please??
  5. Jediksten Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 6, 2002
    it sounds really good :)
    more soon?
  6. Knight-Ander Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 19, 2002
    star 4
    Very good, so far. :)

    "She" I'm guessing, is Tahiri, right?
  7. _Tenel_Ka_ Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 11, 2001
    star 4
    Holy toledo Batman!!


    This is AWESOME! You're such an incredible writer! Post more soon!
  8. JediWarriorYoda Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2002
    star 4
    LadyMairead, I'm disappointed in you..........















    You said your stuff wasn't good. This is so awesome, your power of description is awesome.
  9. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    You guys are awesome. I don't know what to say, thank you so much for saying such nice things!!!

    Jediksten : Thanks! And as a matter of a fact, I will be posting again in a few minutes. :)

    Knight-Ander Oooh, guesses! But I can't reveal my secrets...

    TenelKa [face_blush] Wow. Thanks. I love your writing!!

    JWY Awwwww... You're the best, as always!

    Thanks everyone!!! You make me feel special. :D
  10. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    dum dum dum.... And I give you ---- The Next Post!

    --------------------------------
    Even as she stood, gazing out into the eternal night of space, filled to the brim with sensation, she felt a tickling at the back of her mind and the swirling unreality of her thoughts receded slightly as she realized that she was not alone.

    She could feel him standing hesitantly near the docking bay, cursing his own indecision and cursing the emotions that clouded his thoughts. As she slowly turned to face him, she felt the glow of his love for her warm the ice in her heart, and a bit more melted away.

    In her heightened state of emotions, she felt tears of gratitude rush to her eyes as she sensed his overwhelming concern for her. She watched as his eyes were drawn slowly but unerringly to hers. As their gazes met, both of their doubts were pushed aside.

    Our friendship has kept me sane, she realized. When her life was spiraling out of control, when everything that she had once believed unbreakable had been scattered in all directions, he was the one constant. She could always see the path ahead with him. Sometimes it would twist and turn and she could not see where it ended, but with him there was always solid ground on which to place her feet.

    The one element in my life about which I have never had any doubts is his loyalty.

    As he walked toward her and she reached out her arms and wrapped them around his waist, her senses were filled with him. And it was infinitely more pleasurable than being in that moment alone. The stillness of time was now both a blessing and a curse, and she reveled in the paradox.

    "Don't worry," he said, as he kissed her forehead.

    They both turned once more to gaze up at the stars.

    And minutes passed.

    And they waited.

    ---------------------

    Well, there it is. I hope you like it! I promise there will be another post tonight, so stick around!
  11. Knight-Ander Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 19, 2002
    star 4
    Sticking around. :D

    Good post.

    The bare feet reference made me guess Tahiri, but now I'm not so sure.
  12. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    Thanks Sache. And here's the next post, as promised. Although I guess it's still morning over there for you guys... *sigh* I get so confused...
    --------------------------------------

    In another part of the galaxy, time had also changed its pace.

    A ship emerged from hyperspace at an indistinct point somewhere between the center of one galaxy and the edge of another, changed course, and reentered hyperspace. A man sat in meditation, parting the curtains of reality as he moved between planes of understanding. Time also seemed changed to this man. But he was accustomed to the capriciousness of time, and rather than dwell upon it, he ignored its passage.

    What is truth?

    The truth, he had come to understand, was something that we chose to believe. The only real truth was that there is no truth, because even that was a lie. He had also come to understand that right and wrong did not exist, while at the same time they did. In a grand cosmic sense, the ideas of right and wrong were simply constructs which we used to justify our actions and make our decisions.

    His thoughts always returned to the classic question that was posed to schoolchildren of every species:

    A man's wife is very ill with a disease that bacta cannot cure. In fact, there is only one remedy in the whole galaxy, and it is relatively inexpensive to manufacture. But it is being sold at an exhorbiant price for the manufacturer's profit. Was it wrong for the man to break into the med station, destroy the guard droid, and steal the medication?

    As a child, he had said that stealing was wrong and so was the man. As a teenager, he had said that saving the man's wife was more important the the law, so the man was right. But somewhere in the back of his mind, he had never felt comfortable with those answers. Such distinctions of right and wrong had never completely satisfied him. And now, no longer a child and infinitely the wiser with the knowledge of how little he really understood, he had discovered the answer to the question.

    What the man had done was neither right nor wrong; it contained elements of both, but it was impossible, and pointless, to attempt to weigh them and discover whether the action was more of one or the other. Right and wrong were irrelevant in that situation: the point was that the man had chosen a course of action that produced a particular result. The judgement of the morality of his actions was extraneous.

    But at the same time, he believed that right and wrong did still exist and could still be important, vital even. For instance, he believed that it was wrong to steal something simply out of desire. But where, he wondered, does that line of distinction lie, between the black and white of right and wrong and the gray where it didn't matter? Had it been right or wrong of him to refuse to fight, to refuse to use the Force for agression? Maybe, like the man in the story, his actions had been neither. But why?

    Yet even as he asked himself these questions, and marveled at his new understanding, he had an inkling that perhaps the answers weren't so easy as this. That perhaps the truth couldn't be gleaned from something so simple as a child's tale of morality. He felt that he was missing something, passing by it, catching a glimpse from the corner of his eye, but unable to focus on it clearly. What it was, though, he had no idea. But perhaps his knowledge that he did not fully understand the answers to these questions was as important as the answers themselves.

    The truth is always greater than the words we use to describe it. He heard a whisper float through his mind.

    "Deep thoughts, young Solo." A voice cut through his thoughts, and the threads of truth and untruth that he had begun to weave into something resembling understanding unraveled and slipped away.

    "When the teacher mocks," he answered slowly, as his eyes slid open, "it becomes difficult for the student to learn."

    "Mock? I do not mock, I only observe."

    He took a deep breath, " Right. If you say so." He stretched his arms above his h
  13. Knight-Ander Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 19, 2002
    star 4
    Grrrr! Vergere. :mad: That bird can be more frustrating than a... a... well, I don't know what's more frustrating than her! If I was a Padawan to her Jedi Master, I'd wind-up kiling myself from bashing my head against the wall so much! :)

    Very good, mi'lady. Keep it up.
  14. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    Tee hee. Thank you Knight_Ander
  15. Sache8 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 2000
    star 4
    While I'm not really keen on the vague Force-revelations of Traitor, you seem to have a very good handle on them. ;) I only hope that Jacen doesn't go all monk-ish like Luke did for the greater part of the EU.

  16. JediWarriorYoda Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2002
    star 4
    Those were so good, I wish I had been up to read them when they first were put on the boards. Darn, those time zones.....
    Don't second guess your work. You're writing style is unique, you use description to draw in your readers in and then with those descriptions you leave us in suspense. Keep up the great work!! Can't wait to find out who you were talking about in the first couple of posts.
  17. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    Sache: I know, the whole philosphy thing can get kinda dull, but I love it! And I know what you mean about Luke, that did get old. Thank god for Mara!

    JWY: What can I say, you're so good to me! The time zone thing is totally killing me. I hate being the only one around on the boards... It's creepy.

    The next post is sort of ready, but I'm not sure if I'm going to post it tonight or not...
  18. JediWarriorYoda Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2002
    star 4
    How many hours ahead are you then us in America?
  19. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    Six hours. It's about ten p.m. here.
  20. JediWarriorYoda Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2002
    star 4
  21. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    Okay, *whew* just finished the next post (on paper, anyway). If anyone wants it, I can have it up in a few minutes, or else I'll post tommorrow.

    Any takers?
  22. JediWarriorYoda Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2002
    star 4
  23. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    Yes! :)
    It's just that I have so much fun posting that I forget I need to hold off until I have more written.
    But Ok, if you really want it...
  24. Knight-Ander Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 19, 2002
    star 4
  25. Sache8 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 2000
    star 4
    I know how you feel. I usually use up my supply of pre-written posts in the first week, and then have to write them as I go. ;)


    Wow, you must be up pretty late then! It's got to be what... going on 11 for you, huh?
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