Shades of Gray -- NJO -- (links pg. 1)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by LadyMairead, Sep 13, 2002.

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  1. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
  2. Utuu Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 18, 2002
    star 2
  3. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    A teaser post, to tide you over until I get the actual post done tomorrow or Wednesday.

    *********************************************************

    Six thin, glossy legs, radiating outward in perfect synchrony, edged forward, upward, sideways, and then down, to drop ever-so-gently atop the matted brown hair of the human figure beneath. The six legs, and the brown oblong body attached, froze as the human lurched forward, and then waited in utter stillness until the shifting stopped.

    Skittering one-hundred and eighty degrees to the left, the insect paused only to shake one of its legs free of the tangled mane before clambering down the shoulders and back of the hunched form. Extending two furred feelers, it navigated around the man?s ribcage and forearm, to position itself directly over the heart.

    It felt the need burning deep inside, searing through its body and legs, scorching its nerve endings, razing its eyes. Moisture. Its pores puckered with dryness, its parched exoskeleton ground painfully at the joints, its feelers hung limp and shriveled.

    Its primitive mind did not know the name for the substance it needed, did not know its own particular biochemical makeup nor the nutrients and electrolytes necessary to maintain bodily functions. It simply felt the hunger, the craving, the white-hot desire that shot through its body, incinerating all but that feeling of emptiness, of need.

    It could sense the blood, the fluids, the tissues rich with water beating and throbbing under the surface of the skin. Its legs trembled with a potent mixture of longing and relief. Unrolling its double mouthparts, it cut twin slits on the human?s chest, and burrowed.

    The body was moving now, a roiling, shaking, convulsing upheaval, but the insect did not heed the sudden motion. It simply fed, gorging itself on the wet tissue within the chest cavity, mindless of the mortal struggle precipitated by its own creation.


    *************************************************

    His head buzzed. It rang and pounded behind that curious cloudy feeling, that haze separating himself from reality.

    Who was screaming? Was it him? He blinked. The haze thickened.

    There were lights now, those familiar red and blue flashes that heralded disaster. No, that?s not right. They followed disaster. Heralded wasn?t the right word. Then again, for those caught unaware in the midst of tragedy, they heralded a disaster greater than words.

    It wasn?t him screaming, he realized, because he was talking now. Explaining something. The medic was nodding, so apparently he was making sense, although he didn?t really know what he was saying. The haze was so thick, he couldn?t hear his own voice. Just rounded, torpid noises. He shook his head in frustration.

    He felt something, a vague sensation that seemed only peripherally connected to his body. He looked down. Someone?s hand was on his arm. He blinked and pulled his chin upward. Another medic, maybe the same one as before, was tugging on his arm.

    Irritably, he tried to tug his elbow away, but the motion didn?t translate well from his brain to his arm. He shook his head again, and blinked.

    When he opened his eyes again, he was moving. The ridged, shiny green leaves of the canopy were flying past his eyes. He watched, entranced by their luster, so impossibly distinct and colorful and perfect. Was it possible?

    He sighed. His head was starting to throb again, with that edge of buzzing, so he relinquished the enigma of nature, and let the haze close in again.

    ***************************************************

  4. Utuu Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 18, 2002
    star 2
    Ooooooh. Looks good.
  5. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    Merci beaucoup, mon cher.
  6. Utuu Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 18, 2002
    star 2
    What does that mean?
  7. Trickster_Jaina_Fel Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 3, 2002
    star 5
    two excellent posts -- i didn't read the teaser though, as those nasty things seem to make little sense and just throw my head out of whack even more than usual :p
  8. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    Utuu: *rolls eyes* Learn French!

    TJF: *grins* Fair enough. Thanks for your comments.
  9. Utuu Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 18, 2002
    star 2
    It means...learn...French? But, I know Merci Beaucoup means thank you, so that's not what it means at all. What You Say?
  10. JediWarriorYoda Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2002
    star 4
    She said thank you very much, my something... don't know what cher means, but I don't think it's bad because Cher the singer is also name that, so I'm thinking it's a term of endearment...

    Now that's more like it...(this refers to the teaser)
  11. Trickster_Jaina_Fel Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 3, 2002
    star 5
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] you guys are hilarious...strictly translated, she said "Thank you so much, my dear" cher = dear :p [face_laugh]

    *momentarily loves being a frenchie*

    ~TJF
  12. Rogue_of-Peace Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 7, 2002
    star 4
    [face_laugh] @ Utuu. You fool...

    So, how are you enjoying HP5, LadyMairead?
  13. Utuu Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 18, 2002
    star 2
    ROP: *clicks tongue* Jealousy does not suit you, lad. Just because nobody has ever refered to you by a foreign term of endearment does not mean you have to take it out on me. [mutters]'sides, at least I'm not a Kiwi[/mutters]

    Thank you JWY and TJF, I appreciate your helpfulness. 'Specially since some authors, who shall remain LM, are not quite so nice to their Chief Reviewers. Such a shame, really.
  14. Rogue_of-Peace Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 7, 2002
    star 4
    Well, thank God that your not a Kiwi then. We wouldn't want you to be an example of the population, especially when you don't know a simple phrase in French. And you forgot the first rule: if you don't understand, don't show it, and find out.

    And I think she may have way back at the start of this fic, before you arrived, when I used to keep calling her, "mi'lady".

    Oh and you won't be accepted as an example cos you can't translate a simple message: [face_laugh] @ Utuu. You fool... Does not equal Jealousy (It was supposed to have an = line with a strike down but it doesn't work here)
  15. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    Je t'aime aussi, ROP. ;)

    *high fives TJF*

    Nice try, JWY. [face_laugh]

    And Utuu... *shakes her head hopelessly*


    Seriously, though, before the post, I have to extend a massive Thank You to Utuu and JWY for talking me off a ledge with this story. I was really frustrated and about ready to give up on SoG altogether, but they were kind enough to spend close to an hour (I think it was like two hours with you, Utuu ;) ) hashing out all my character and plot problems with me. Thanks so much guys, I don't know what I would do without you. :)

    On to the post. It's rather lengthy, so grab a pillow. ;) Oh, and it might not make sense without the teaser, so skim that if you haven't.

    ****************************************************

    ?Are you alright? Is everything?Jag? Jag look at me??

    His eyes were hazy, darting back and forth, then stopping suddenly to stare, unseeing, at the wall. His pupils looked wide and unfocused.

    ?Jag, look at me please.? She could hear a tinge of desperation creeping into her voice. She closed her hand around his elbow and pulled him closer to her. But he still seemed unaware of her presence.

    She reached up to rub the back of her hand along the familiar jawline, prickly and unshaven, feeling the warmth of his touch and hoping he could feel her. His eyes skittered to the side again, but this time they landed on her.

    ?Jaina?? It sounded as if he was asking the question to himself and had merely vocalized unintentionally, squinting with the effort of putting this face into this context. He struggled a few minutes more and she lifted her lips to press them against his cheek, his neck, his lips.

    ?Jag, it?s me. I?m here. Are you alright? Tell me you?re alright??

    Thing suddenly snapped into place, his pupils dilated and then contracted once, and he breathed, ?Jaina?.? no longer a question, but a confirmation.

    ****************************************************************

    ?Jaina??

    Why was she here? He still didn?t understand, but he was relieved nevertheless to see a recognizable face. She was asking him questions again, and he had to strain against that feeling of disconnectedness, of distance, of something like drunkenness, to understand the meaning of the string of words.

    ??alright? Are you??

    ?Yeah?yes, I?m fine.? They must have told her that he was uninjured, that it wasn?t him the red and blue lights had come for, but to hear it from his own lips seemed to reassure her, and her eyes closed in momentary relief. She drew her hands down his arms and he exhaled in pleasure and leaned into her, not caring that they were in the middle of the medward.

    ?Why?how did you get in here?? He opened his eyes, feeling grounded, as if all the pieces of his body had reconnected, that floating sensation gone. It was her touch that pulled him out of the haze.

    ?They called me?when they brought you in they called me.? She sounded almost apologetic, and her next words came quickly. ?Maybe because we?re in the same squadron.?

    He knew that wasn?t why they had called her, of all people, that it had been a different reason altogether, but he didn?t contradict her. Better that it wasn?t discussed, especially here, in the middle of everyone. They were standing in the middle of everyone.

    ?Let?s go sit down,? he suggested, pulling her toward a row of orange chairs. They sat, and he pretended not to notice when she leaned against him a little, pressing her body against the side of his. He shivered internally, but held himself still.

    ?But I thought they weren?t letting anyone in here?because of the quarantine.?

    ?The quarantined patients are in a different wing. Besides, I have connections?? Her eyes sparkled as she said this, words trailing off at the end like a suggestion, waiting for him to fill in the blank. He didn?t disappoint her.

    ?Ah, of course. The Princess and the General,? he began, lifting his chin and adopting a tone of disgust. ?The Chief-of-State and the War Her
  16. Rogue_of-Peace Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 7, 2002
    star 4
    Merci beaucoup, ma dame. :p @ Utuu.

    Intriguing.... very clever hiding the source of the virus as the bug who demolished his lightsaber... that's all I thought it did. Very clever indeed.
  17. Utuu Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 18, 2002
    star 2
    :D Hehehe I do so love being me. I actually understood most of the phrase, ROP, and I also knew that you weren't jealous. Y'know, with the whole laughter, and mocking, and the...OK, so it wasn't that funny, but still...lemme alone! And I'd actually be pleased to be a New Zealander, Kiwi name notwithstanding. ;) I mean, when was the last time NZ started an unjustified war? Besides, my ignorance is one of my best qualities. Y'know, since they're all such good qualities and so forth. Ranks right up there with my humility. ;)

    At any rate. don't feel so hopeless, LM. I must amuse myself, mustn't I. So, onwards and upwards...

    Oh god, there Jaina goes again, what with the selfishness. I really don't like her. She needs her comeuppance. Oh well, Jag was good. Humanity suits him.

    All in all, a pretty good job, dear. I do think it suffered somewhat for a lack of character interaction or internal monologue. Even so, the building of tension between the Intel crew was done very well, and I look forward to the climax of the Ylesia mission. I do wonder, however, just what kind of spice they need? There's a lot of different types.
  18. JediWarriorYoda Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2002
    star 4
    Ooh, it seems we've gone back to the good ole days... Hmm, I knew the bug that demolished the saber also brought the virus, but the thing that intrigued me the most was that Jag doesn't look people in the eye when he is talking to him or is it just Jaina that he does this with...
  19. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    ROP: Thank you! I do so love being called clever. :D

    Utuu: How is Jaina being selfish? :confused: I'm not sure what you're referring to, could you be more specific? Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed the post.

    I do wonder, however, just what kind of spice they need? There's a lot of different types.

    [face_plain] Stop making things difficult.

    JWY: Thank you! I appreciate your help earlier, and I'm very happy you liked the post.
  20. Utuu Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 18, 2002
    star 2
    No, I can't.

    [face_plain] Just say Glitterstim and go back to writing.
  21. Rogue_of-Peace Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 7, 2002
    star 4
    Nah, get some ryll kor. You can't go wrong with ryll kor. 9 out of 10 Twi'leks agree.
  22. Utuu Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 18, 2002
    star 2
    At the risk of sounding ignorant again *rolls eyes* how do you even do ryll kor? Stupid SW and their drugs that are mined out of the ground. How did they even discover the narcotic properties? Something like;

    "Gee Mal'nia, why don't we expose this spiderweb we found on a planet with no atmosphere to direct sunlight and then consume it so we can figue out if it has narcotic properties? Won't that be fun?"

    "Oh, wait, I have a better idea. Why don't we chew on these rocks we dug out of a mine on Ryloth? That's an even better idea!"

    Andris is good, though. It's like the Cocaine of the SW Universe. "Andris; The *other* white powder." 1 out of 1 Sigmund Freuds agree.
  23. LadyMairead Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    I remember I looked it up once, and I picked the one that you could swallow or inject. I don't remember which one it was, but that's it. I have to find it again.

    But don't let me stop your argument. :D
  24. Utuu Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 18, 2002
    star 2
  25. Utuu Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 18, 2002
    star 2
    Argument? I thought for once I wasn't arguing. Oh well, it sounds like Carsunm, unless Ryll isn't just cut with something else or consumed orally. Hey, I never said I dodn't have a reasonable idea of how it was used.
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