Beyond Shades of the Past - 4/6 - AUTHOR'S NOTE *sigh*

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Jesina_Dreis, Jan 5, 2005.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
Moderators: Briannakin, mavjade
  1. -thor- Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 15, 2002
    star 4
    Yeah sure. He cares for her :rolleyes: He cares so much he just drugs her. What a :-B
  2. Jesina_Dreis Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 8, 2004
    star 4
    Luney - Yes, poor Jes. And I think Lonciez is evil enough to deserve being killed more than once ;)

    Red - No, really not good. Next post is worse though.

    Mara - Hey, I like McDonalds! :p

    Spee - Yup...he's dead, and that's good and bad all at the same time. I just love catch-22s, don't you? [face_devil]
    The tunnels are coming soon...very soon...and there will be more exploration of Lonciez's motivations later on.

    Ro - You? Silent? [face_laugh] :p I'm just teasing you... ;)
    No, I don't hate Jes. Actually, I'm rather fond of her. But I'm cruel to everyone I love in these stories... [face_devil]
    You don't have to hide in the corner for long...I'm gonna be generous with the postingness

    Wintych - Something bad always has to happen...Hey, it's me... *holds out arms in Han fashion*
    Just...try to remember, I'm not ALL evil... [:D]

    Jaya - :confused: nano-bots??
    And, oh, yes, you can bet on me having an evil plan...

    LordInferno - I have no idea what to say to that. I'm just going to start admitting when you confuse me beyond all comprehension

    Thor - Just remember...nothing is as it seems... [face_devil]


    Next post coming rather soon...even though I know I'm going to get mocked for not waiting, I don't care...plus, part of this was given away by someone, and I would prefer you guys read the post rather than the slip-up that was made.


    ~Jes~
  3. Jesina_Dreis Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 8, 2004
    star 4
    Chapter 25


    "Elscol!"

    She spun around, spilling some of her caf, but ignored it even as it splashed over her boots. "What's happening?"

    "You've got perimeter alarms going off all over the map."

    "Wake your girlfriend, major," Elscol told him. "It's time to go."

    "I'm here. What's going on?"

    "We've got about five minutes until the Imps are knocking on our front door." She slapped at a control panel, and everyone in the room looked up as the relative quiet was broken by the blast of an alarm. "Get your people out of here!" she yelled over the din. This was, first and foremost, her fight, and she felt she owed it to Wedge to keep his people - some of them her friends - alive.

    Even as she gathered the things she really didn't want to leave behind, she watched the Rogues and Wraiths gather around their respective leaders, and could hear Hobbie order them to get moving. As they headed off toward the tunnels, she grabbed a nearby chair with both hands and swung it at the wall of monitors, turning her head as sparks and shards rained down on her. She could bring the equipment, but she wasn't about to let the Imps know what she'd been doing.

    She saw Hobbie turn at the sound but waved him on, watching as they reached the rear of the warehouse. Just as the last pilot disappeared into the tunnel, though, a crash reverberated through the warehouse - coming from their direction.

    * * * * * * * *

    Inyri and Hobbie led the Rogues out of the warehouse a few meters behind Piggy, Shalla, Runt, and Dia, who were closely following Kell and Face. The plan was to get those who'd flown down back to their fighters, and then head with the others to the tree line and wait until Elscol and her backup could get to them.

    Of course, it didn't work out that way. They'd gotten about ten meters in when the ceiling between them and the Wraiths collapsed. There was no explosion, just the crash as the duracrete that had been overhead hit the ground.

    Coughing from the dust that filled the air, Inyri stared at Hobbie, then at the now blockaded passage, and then back to Hobbie. "We have to go back." There was certainly no going forward. The Wraiths were on their own.

    He nodded and turned to the others. "Double back. Head for Elscol's freighter. Keep low and to the sides, and expect a fight. The Imps will probably have made it inside the warehouse by now."

    On the short trip back to the mouth of the tunnel, Hobbie slipped up to the front, ordering a very annoyed Inyri to stay in back. As they reached the entrance, he could see into what had been their command center. It had become a shooting gallery, with those who hadn't been able to escape hiding behind overturned tables and equipment that now bore many more holes than it had originally been made with. When he stopped, the others gathered around him, resting on hands and knees.

    "The other entrance is about twenty meters that way," he said, gesturing in the general direction. "It's all open, so keep low until you get behind the building, and then run as fast as you can. There's nothing to hide behind if anyone sees us." They were outside the warehouse, but about ten meters was open to view from inside the building, via the door and a long window. The last ten - the distance he'd told them to run - was hidden by the warehouse's back wall. "Inyri, Donos, Duryll, go."

    He watched as Inyri led them, following his instructions to the letter, occasionally glancing back at the melee inside the warehouse. Luckily for them, it looked like more of Elscol's people had arrived to help try to evacuate those still trapped, and they were serving as a decent distraction to the Imps. Elscol, having headed to her ship, was probably long gone.

    As Duryll disappeared into the tunnel, Hobbie ordered Gavin and Ensa to go and followed himself. But then Ensa's foot caught on a stone and he fell forward, catching the attention of at least one Imperial, who didn't hesitate to open fire on them. A second later he was joined by others, and the quiet esca
  4. padawan lunetta Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 15, 1999
    star 6
    NOOO! HOw could you? :'( :'( :'( Poor Hobbie! And poor Inyiri! :'( Well done though...but STILL :'(
  5. Thrawn McEwok Co-Author: Essential Guide to Warfare

    VIP
    Member Since:
    May 9, 2000
    star 6
    HOBBIE!!! :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :_| :_| :_| :_|

    And, the poor random OC, too... :eek: :( :_|

    And Piggy, MiA!! :eek: :eek:

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    - The Imperial Ewok
  6. -thor- Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 15, 2002
    star 4
    You do have a thing for killing people, don't you? :eek: :mad:

    I expect you to come up with a surprising twist! :p ;)
  7. RedGold Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 29, 2004
    star 4
    *shoots Jes*

    There... I feel all better now.
  8. RogueMara Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 29, 2005
    star 2
    :eek:

    HOBBIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :_|

    What is wrong with you? lol

    Is this revenge for the McDonald's comment? Cause I take it back! lol
  9. Jaya Solo Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 12, 1999
    star 5
    Wow. I wasn't expecting that. I was expecting more of a... you kill off Escol and then their escape plan is blocked... not that you would kill Hobbie off. :( Poor Inyri. :(
  10. SweetPea Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 8, 2004
    star 2
    Oh. My. God.

    OHMYGOD!!!

    :eek:


    :_| You killed my Hobbie... :_|


    You evil, evil, author...


    That's it! I'm gonna...uh....



    *steals Jes' shoes*
  11. talkingbanana Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 4, 2003
    star 3
    Blast! You killed him again!

    *wails with everyone else*

    And hey - I did tell you that the deep sense of foreboding and despair had a purpose, right? [face_whistling]

    Oh yeah, and um, good writing and all that jazz. It was a nice update, minus the whole Hobbie's-dead-again thing.

    *bursts out laughing at McEwok's "poor random OC" comment and runs away*
  12. Mirax_Corran Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 25, 2005
    star 4
    Wh-bu-ho-Co-d-Ty-de-We-de-Co
    I'm speechless!(only from first five chapters)

    :_| :eek: YOU KILLED CORRAN?!?!?!?

    AND YOU MADE TYCHO SUICIDAL?!?!?!?!?!How could you? I think Corran's affair is a LOT nicer!

    Commander Corran Horn - Human male from Corellia
    Why is he in the Dramatis Personae if he dies in the first post?

    ?Because Corran just tried to kill me. And came very close to succeeding.? He could have kicked himself for being so blunt, but, truthfully, couldn?t think of any other way to say it. Besides, Mirax was hardly one for dancing around an issue herself.

    Mirax stared at him, unblinking. No. There was no way. No way. ?What kind of sick joke is this?? she finally exploded. She couldn?t imagine him saying something like that if it wasn?t true, but there was no way it could be true.

    ?No joke,? Tycho told her softly. He recounted what had happened on the test run. His eyes were closed, his face becoming paler and his breathing more shallow with each word. At one point, Wedge had to help him into a chair because he?d started to sway slightly, but he?d kept talking.

    She sat in silence as he finished his account, eyes closed tightly, willing herself to keep her emotions under control. When she finally opened her eyes, she looked straight at Tycho. ?You did what you had to do. I won?t hold it against you. Now, if you both will excuse me, I?m going to go home.? She wanted to be with her child right now. Her son Valin wasn?t even a year old.

    Wedge sighed. He caught her arm as she rose. ?Mirax?? he began, but she pulled away and cut him off.

    ?No, Wedge. Not now. Just?? She shook her head. ?Not now.? Then she was gone, determined to escape before the tears began to fall.
    :_| :_| :_|

    POOR MIRAX!!!!!
    Myri
    Please have Corran come back from the dead [face_praying]



    Corran's back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YayYayYay!!!!! :D

    Later: How could you??? 'Nyri is one of my fave characters. And I've always liked Hobbie! I was going to chant 'Nyri and Hobbs but now I can't can I??
    Myri
  13. SweetPea Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 8, 2004
    star 2
    Anyway, Jes, these shoes aren't my size so...*shrug*...I guess you can have them back...

    Oh! and Ro, here are your Docs back...I'm pretty sure the garbage-can smell is almost entirely gone...

    and here is my more detailed review:

    "Wake your girlfriend, major," Elscol told him. "It's time to go."
    Okay, so this is Hobbie POV...

    then at the now blockaded passage
    See??? Tunnels are a bad idea!!!

    He had just reached the tunnel, right behind Gavin, when the Imps who had seen them made it outside. He knew he was in trouble a second before the blaster bolt hit him in the back, spinning him around as another struck his chest.
    Gah!!! I think it's interesting here that you have Hobbie's death from his own POV. And I think it's well done. I imagine in cases like this death is just kind of big surprise: a moment to go "Uh-oh," and then...nothing.

    First, Corran's supposed death, and Tycho's breakdown. Then they found Corran, but one of the Wraiths was killed. Now Jesina was missing, another Wraith was dead, and two Rogues were gone. And Elscol had been forced to abandon her resistance effort, albeit briefly, because Hekrig had chosen this perfect point in time to come after them.
    Nice wrap-up of the tragedy there...*sigh*

    She swallowed hard. "Wedge?"

    The knot was now a solid block of ice. "What, Elscol?"

    "Hobbie is dead."

    NOOOOOOOO!!!

    And now I am off to inaugurate my new microwave, which I'm told involves smashing a bottle of champagne against its hull. Or something of that nature.
  14. Maggy Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 2, 2004
    star 4
    *stumbles into thread*

    *waves*

    hello everyone! I am alive! :p

    my dear Jes because i missed already three ups (and I kinda reviewed to it all already and I have not much time and all and everything and so on and has forgotten what she wanted to say :confused: ...

    What I am saying? Um ... yeah ... um ... i only say:

    How dare you killing Hobbs

    *gets her cry attack again*

    :_|
    :_|
    :_|
    :_|
    :_|
    :_|
    :_|

    *leaves with red rimmed eyes and tears strained cheeks*


    ~Mag~


    *peaks in again*

    hello Mirax :)

    >Commander Corran Horn - Human male from Corellia <
    Why is he in the Dramatis Personae if he dies in the first post?


    brillant! :D

    nobody has noticed that before


    *scurries off*
  15. Knight_Aragorn Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 15, 2003
    star 4
    You....killed....Hobbie? *in shock*


    ...


    :_| :_| :_|

    Even after he was shot, I was expecting (hoping) that they'd be able to save him. But...

    "Hobbie is dead."

    :eek: NOOOO!!!

    Poor Inyri. Poor Wes and Wedge. I bet this will hit them all hard. :(

    I don't suppose there's any chance of a miraculous recovery? Or an alternate dimension Hobbie appearing? Or any of the other variants of implausible resurrections that appear in sci-fi so often? [face_batting]

    *Sigh*... it was worth a try. :p

    Very well written, by the way. Great action scene, very intense. But... I can't believe you killed him... :_|
  16. Jesina_Dreis Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 8, 2004
    star 4
    Hey, guys....Myri_Antilles and I have created a Pilot Fic Index and Discussion thread in Resource. Please stop by and support your fellow pilot readers and writers!!

    And don't forget to submit your stuff if we don't have it!


    Pilot Fic Index and Discussion Thread


    :D :D :D :D :D
  17. Rowan_Jade Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 14, 2003
    star 3
    You're not REALLY gonna want to read a review from me are you???? No? Okay, so I'll just make comments on everyone else's comments...


    Thor
    You do have a thing for killing people, don't you?

    Yeah, she's pretty good at it huh? :mad:

    Red

    *shoots Jes*

    There... I feel all better now.


    Oh, nice Red, Now we'll NEVER get another post... :p

    Rogue (or Mara, which ever you prefer)

    What is wrong with you? lol

    Do you want a list??? :confused:

    Is this revenge for the McDonald's comment? Cause I take it back! lol

    Yup! It's all YOUR fault she killed Hobbs!

    Nanner

    And hey - I did tell you that the deep sense of foreboding and despair had a purpose, right?

    This is the reason you are now: The Minister of Foreboding and Despair and more to come later... *throws MORE confetti* Congrats! You're just the woman for the job! *Pats Nanner on the back & hands her champagne*

    Spee

    And now I am off to inaugurate my new microwave, which I'm told involves smashing a bottle of champagne against its hull. Or something of that nature.

    Ya can't Spee, I just swiped the bottle of champagne & haded it to Nanner for her election. You can however, microwave something... that'd serve as a breaking in ceremony. Just don't try using the cat. I know he can dial 911 pretty well, but the microwave is a whole 'nother can of worms! I'll send the guinea pig over to give the cat lessons in microwaving... he's really good at it, but he keeps burning the popcorn. :p PS. THIS was the post.... I warned you (sort of)....

    Mag

    stumbles into thread*

    *waves*

    hello everyone! I am alive!


    *waves at Mag* Hi! :D [:D]

    Yeah!!!!!! Mag's alive.... too bad Hobbie isn't ! :mad:


    Jaya

    I don't suppose there's any chance of a miraculous recovery?

    um, nope, probably not... she likes to kill the main characters, in case you haven't noticed yet.

    Or an alternate dimension Hobbie appearing? Or any of the other variants of implausible resurrections that appear in sci-fi so often?

    Admit it... first nano-bots, now this... you're secretly a Trekie aren't you???? Oh, wait.... if I KNEW about that that'd make me a Trekie too huh? Um, no.... not us, Council members, we'd NEVER watch a show that was so loosley based on reality.... really! *phew, they bought it!*

    Jes

    I'd comment, but you KNOW how I feel about this... feel free to copy & paste any of my replies to the replies if you want, save a few keystrokes there... :D I have voiced my opinion at DownTime so no more prodding (till next topic comes up).... I'm still taking suggestions for a title if you stumble across any that would be perfect for it... since you are one of three whole people that know what I'm talking about (ever)... :p

    Okay, I'll go cry in the corner now until you bring my Hobbs (well, Spee's Hobbs if I remember correctly) back and make Tych sane & non suicidal and all of the other things I wish you'd do but you won't ....*sigh*

    YodaRo (who still loves ya even if you killed Hobbie)




  18. RogueMara Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 29, 2005
    star 2
    Yup! It's all YOUR fault she killed Hobbs!

    I TAKE IT BACK!!! *goes out to find a way to bring Hobbie back* *finds some copper wire and a pair of scissors* *gets excited*
  19. SweetPea Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 8, 2004
    star 2
    Ro

    Ya can't Spee, I just swiped the bottle of champagne & haded it to Nanner for her election

    Ro!!!! That was Dom Perignon!!!!!

    :mad: Shall I take your shoes again?

    Nanner

    Congratulations, Minister!! :D

    Mag

    Yay! You're alive! :D
  20. bkwormlisa Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Feb 10, 2005
    Ouch. You really do go in for killing main characters, don't you? At least he isn't one of my favorites. :\ But couldn't you have killed Inyri instead?
  21. talkingbanana Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 4, 2003
    star 3
    Y'know, re-read that again, and I gotta hand it to ya, MF: as much as I hate you for killing Hobbie, at least you did it well.

    Yay! I've always wanted to be the Minister of Foreboding and Despair! Does that mean I don't have to go to calculus tomorrow morning?

    *hands back the champagne* Save that until I'm older, will ya? ;)
  22. Mirax-Jade Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 7, 2003
    star 4
    You...You...You...YOU...OMGYOUKILLEDHOBBIE!!!!!!!!


    ::mutters string of evil curses under breath::

    Yes. Directed at you oh EVIL one!!!!!!


    {great post by the way but that is BESIDE the point}


    AHHHHHHHHHHHH! ::eek:ffers you cookies and STEALS them back::
  23. Myri_Antilles Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2004
    star 4
    <stomps into thread, whacks Jes over the head with the butt end of her lightsaber, and stomps back out, muttering something about evil authors who kill members of the fab four>
  24. Wintych Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 2, 2004
    :eek: :eek: :eek:

    English not being my native language, I believed during one moment that I had not understood well...

    but not...

    YOU KILLED HOBBIE!!!!!!

    :_| :_| :_|
    :_| :_| :_|

    I expected that somebody dies, but not him!!!
    Why him? How could you?

    OH, YOU ARE SO EVIL!!!!!!!!! :mad: :mad:

    POOR INYRI!!! They were to marry
    POOR WES!!! Jes is very badly and now Hobbie, his best friend, dies
    POOR WEDGE!!! They were friends since so a long time
    POOR TYCHO!!! how will he take the news?

    I hope that they will be well. ALL.

    Please... [-o| [-o|
  25. Jesina_Dreis Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 8, 2004
    star 4
    Wow....I should kill people more often...got quite the reaction out of you folks...

    Luney - Yeah...I don't know who to feel worse for, Hobbs because he's dead or Inyri because the man she loves is dead :(

    McEwok - Nice to know that someone cares about the poor OC. :p Yes, poor Hobbs. And poor Piggy...and no, he's not MIA...he's actually dead too :_|

    Thor - I don't have a 'thing' for killing people... :p I just try to make it realistic. Face it, if they were forced to evacuate like that, chances were that someone wouldn't make it out alive. Hobbie, as the one in charge on the ground (excepting Elscol) would be the last to run, and would be the first to put himself in harm's way if necessary. :( It fits. As for the others, well, they're more random casualties I admit, but honestly, people die. I didn't, contrary to popular belief, kill them for the sake of killing. [:D]
    No twist for this...this is the reason I put that note sometime back about not everyone I kill coming back to life.

    Red - Well, I'm glad you do, because I don't. :p

    Mara - Trust me, hon, you don't want to know what's wrong with me...it'd take all night. ;) And no, this is not revenge for the McDonald's comment...though you're still mean for saying that :_| [face_laugh]

    Jaya - The thought of killing Elscol hadn't even entered my mind...until now. [face_devil] Yes, poor, poor Inyri...and Wes...and Wedge...and Tycho...and I'm sure there are others

    Spee - [:D] I'm sorry. Really. It made me cry too... :_| ...honest it did. You still love me?

    Nanner - You knew I was going to...shouldn't have gotten your hopes up. Just remember, I have to rewrite a lot of the scenes coming up b/c everyone knows that they were together, which is going to mean lots of crying on my part, because it's so sad and the only way I can write it is by trying to put myself in Inyri's place.

    Mirax - I would call you Myri but I've already got one of those running around here, hitting me with things, so you get to be Mirax.
    So have you actually caught up or did you just want to know what all the crying was all about.
    Yes, I killed Corran and brougt him back. Yes, I killed Hobbie and he won't be coming back. :( Sorry. [:D]
    I don't think I can win with you....I kill Corran and Hobbs in this fic...and in the other one I have Corran having an affair and Hobbs with all these skeletons in his closet and going on trial. [face_thinking] You'll have to wait for the next one. I'll be nice to them both, and Inyri too, in that. I'll pick on other people. [face_mischief]

    Spee (again) - I didn't even think about it as I wrote it...probably because the first time I wrote it was still when I had POV issues with my writing and did it terribly. This time, it just started out as his POV and stayed that way. Glad it worked for you though.
    Actually, since that interests you, go check out DownTime's challenge.
    [:D] again. I still love Hobbs myself, if it's any consolation. And I'll be nice and tell you this: He won't die in "False Truths"

    Mag - [:D] It's okay...he's alive elsewhere.
    Actually, the reason Corran was in the Dramatis Personae is that I copied it from the squadron roster I set up at the very beginning of the story so I'd know everyone's numbers. He's always one of the ones I fill in first because he's always nine.

    K_A - Yes, I killed poor Hobbs. :( He was too badly hurt for them to save, one to the chest and one to the back...no chance :_|
    Yup, poor Inyri and Wes and Wedge...but don't forget Tycho...he's known him longer than any of the others have.
    And, I'm sorry to say, he won't be returning. :(
    I'm glad you liked the post though.

    Ro - No review? :( :p
    Oh, but you should keep coming into DownTime, if only to lodge your protests about people we kill ;) Actually, next week I think we're going to be talking about Wes, soooooo :D
    I'll try to make things better as much as I can by the
Moderators: Briannakin, mavjade
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.