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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Beyond - Legends Shadows of Maybe - {A Dark L/M AU} COMPLETED

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by vader_incarnate, Mar 11, 2004.

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  1. ThePariah

    ThePariah Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2003
    *does eeeeeeevil happy dance*

    More! More! (licks lips) That tasted good. [face_mischief] [face_devil] [face_laugh]

    MWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!!!!!!!!!



    *ahem*...er, ok. :p Anyone who can't possibly imagine a creepy Dark Luke should SO see a twisted little movie called Midnight Ride. Scarred for life, would you be. :eek: ;)
     
  2. vader_incarnate

    vader_incarnate Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 29, 2002
    You know, this is the first of my short-ish fics that has gotten to page 2 since "She Made My Bed" last February. :p Maybe that shouldn't make me feel so spiffy, but it does . . .


    LP - Elli, are you sure you're only going to do ONE more post? This just begs for an extended story!!!

    I'm tempted. [face_blush] Force knows I'm tempted . . . it started out as such a little bunny, you know, but keeps on growing, dagnabbit . . . At this point, though, I think I'm going to end it with what I had originally planned. I might extend it later, and I'm actually writing an alternate happy!ending for Emmi-dearest, but yeah. :p

    The UST is simply delicious. The fact that Mara finds herself falling under the spell of a Dark Luke and trying to fight the attraction just brings shivers up and down my spine.

    *giggles* How sad is it that I had to ask Su before I realized that UST = "unresolved sexual tension"? 8-} And . . . aye. I was ranting during the chat about that. ;) I hope the ending is satisfactory . . . but until then Elli gets to write lots of dark chocolat-- I mean Luke. Lots of dark Luke. *sheepish grin*

    *thwacks young'un*

    *is thwacked* Ow! :p I didn't kill them, he did! *gestures wildly at Lukie* It's not my fault, honest! The bunny made me do it!

    WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BABY??

    Erm . . . next post? [face_hopeful]

    Great post! . . . Sends cyber cookies

    Thankiees! *munches*


    RM - You freaked me 'n' Emmi out so much with that comment. ;) I'm strangely honored, though -- stars, I made RM hate the man who would have been Luke Skywalker. [face_shocked] [face_blush] If that isn't a tribute to my writing ability, I don't know what is . . .

    And -- Evil Luke *shiver* has no light anywhere - he never did . . . I hope that Mara can kill him -- maybe on both counts. [face_devil] *has fun being evil*


    Jaina_Solo_15 - *giggles* Thanks, babe! Stars know I had fun writing it. ;) And Force knows how much fun I had with the next part . . . [face_devil]


    Twinnie - Thanks, babe. *huggies* It's gonna be all right, you'll see . . .


    Jayden112233 - I love your dark Luke and I'm hoping he breaks Mara's resolve and she joins him. *laughs* If I did that, there wouldn't be much of me left after Emmi caught up to me. :p Thanks, though! :)


    Gabri -

    Sweetie, I've said it before and I'll say it again: good Dark Luke fics are few and far between, and a good Dark Mara fic - interestingly enough - seems to be even more rare. Have them fall in love, duel to the death, hold each other captive until Vader or Palpatine can kill one or both - somehow I don't think I'll mind. Comes the Night didn't scare me off, did it?

    [face_laugh] Stars, I should have known better, hmm? 8-} If I decide to indulge that particular bunny, it'll have to wait till after April Fool's Day, I'm afraid; I promised myself I'd write something silly and Elli-ish just to balance out the angst I've been pouring out lately. [face_blush] My muse disappeared for a year, and her evil twin came back . . .

    Because Elli's writing it, Mara, because Elli's writing it.

    You know, after reading that I came to the sad conclusion that I'd never written a happy ending for any of my ficlets. [face_plain] [face_blush] Ah well, this will be the first . . . kinda . . . :p CPOV ... or not ... *hasn't quite decided*


    DARTH_MARIANA - [face_devil] ;) Thanks!


    VaderLVR64 - *hands a tissue* Aw, everything's going to be all right, dear, don't worry . . . Thanks for the compliments! :)


    ThePariah - I need to see that movie. 8-} And aye, isn't dark chocolate tasty? [face_innocent] [face_devil]





    2AM-ISH EDIT: *yawns* And after putting the finishing touches on the last nine pages that I'm still not satisfied with, I'm off to bed ...
     
  3. vader_incarnate

    vader_incarnate Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 29, 2002
    *pokes to top* Stars, this board moves fast, don't it?

    Wouldn't it be great if I had an update today, right after the last one? ( [face_shocked]) That'll be a first ...

    [face_blush] Anyway. Bored with schoolwork. Fiddling.
     
  4. EmilieDarklighter

    EmilieDarklighter Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 19, 2002
  5. vader_incarnate

    vader_incarnate Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 29, 2002
    *grins back at Emmi* Stars, I'm not satisfied, but I figured I might as well post it now before I talked myself out of it again ... Enjoy! And yes, this is the end! [face_plain] :p

    = = = = =

    Pain.

    It was mind-numbing, excruciating ... she wondered, vaguely, if he had broken anything, before coming to the realization that everything hurt: her head, her chest, her arms ... even her toes, it seemed. Even her hair. She fought against unconsciousness, reaching for the Light to sustain her this one last time, to give her the dignity to die as a Jedi should, as the last of the Jedi should ...

    And she found it. She drew it in quickly, nearly sobbing in relief, and let its warmth flow through her battered body. Carefully, she directed it towards her wounds, towards her sore and aching muscles, towards the painful bruises and lacerations she'd picked up during the fight. Slowly -- too slowly for her comfort, but it would have to do -- the pain began to abate and her mind began to clear. She opened her eyes.

    And wished that she hadn't.

    He was watching her, a quizzical expression upon his face. "I didn't think you'd know how to do that yet," he told her, raising an eyebrow. "Even that much control of the Force could have helped you earlier, you know."

    She opened her mouth for a sharp retort -- or a multilingual hypothesis on his ancestry, whatever came out first -- before coming to the realization that she couldn't.

    She couldn't open her mouth. She couldn't move her jaw at all. In fact ... she couldn't move at all.

    She fought to move, to fight back, to win back control of her seemingly paralyzed muscles; she struggled to stir her head the tiniest bit, all to no avail. He held her against the wall with a powerful Force-grip, held her pinned and frozen like a giant insect for his inspection. She wanted to spit, to curse, to howl her fury at this black-clad monstrosity ... and found that she could do little more than glare at him.

    So she glared.

    He laughed, the sound of it once more echoing off the walls for what seemed to be forever, before dying in the silent oblivion of the abandoned Temple. "So feisty," he complimented, sending her an amused glance. He looked at her thoughtfully, standing with his arms crossed behind his back and his legs splayed, ignoring the blood now dripping down into his black collar. He was smiling, a self-satisfied little smirk that sent tremors up and down her immobile spine.

    Like a little boy inspecting his new toy ... albeit an insane, sadistic, and evil little boy ...

    "Whatever shall I do with you, dear?" he mused, ignoring her poisonous glowering. "It would be a shame to kill you, because then you'd be all gone ... but, still, it'd be so much fun."

    He took a step closer, reaching out a hand for her face, and she fought to draw back, to flinch away, but couldn't do anything more than stare at him in wide-eyed shock. She didn't want to die, didn't want it to end here, after so long, but no matter how hard she tried to move, she couldn't; his control of the Force was unmatched, rivaling that of some of the greatest Jedi masters and far surpassing her own. He brought a hand to her head ...

    ... and withdrew the clasps that held her hair pinned up. She had put her hair up before the fight, knowing that it would get in the way, but now ... he took them out one by one, letting loose the cascade of fiery hair that habitually hung to her shoulders.

    "So much beauty," he whispered, looking into her wide eyes. His expression was unreadable, his eyes cold and impassive. Or was there a hint of something there ... "So much beauty should never be tamed."

    Abruptly, he turned away and began to pace, his dark cloak whirling behind him as he strode forward and back, never more than a meter away from her. "I didn't expect her to be so beautiful," he growled seemingly to himself, almost snarling with what sounded surprisingly like desperation. He spoke quietly, but he was close enough and the Temple was silent enough that his whisper
     
  6. Bri_Windstar

    Bri_Windstar Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 27, 2002
    *uncrosses fingers and sighs exasperatedly* 8-}

    Elli, i LOVE this story. He's so cold, so calculating, and Mara is just as fiery as ever. It's an odd contrast that works well here.

    Gah, he's just plain creepy 8-}

    I liked how he toyed with her, rather like a cat does a mouse. It was so seductively evil. You get a sense that, in his toying with her, he's actually toying with himself, those emotions he shouldnt be able to feel.

    Poor Mara :( 8-}

    ::Windstar Out::
     
  7. RebelMom

    RebelMom Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Apr 20, 2000
    wow, that was good. He was so evil, so seductive. I got shivers. You really like dark stuff, don't you? ;)

    so glad Luke didn't really end up like that. He was creepier than Vader and Palpy put together.
     
  8. obaona

    obaona Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2002
    :D Wonderful! :D I'm jealous. ;)
     
  9. ThePariah

    ThePariah Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 24, 2003
    OH...MY...GOD. :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

    That is the most intense thing I have ever read.

    That kiss---!!! *fans self*

    Elli, you are a genius. A mad, mad, mad genius.

    *faints on top of keyboard* :_|
     
  10. DarthIshtar

    DarthIshtar Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Mar 26, 2001
    ::Fans self while writing out coroner's report.:: Mara Jade-Darklighter, dead by lightsaber through chest, already dead due to a lust-induced heart attack. I think that's my fate as well... Great story.
     
  11. LadyPadme

    LadyPadme Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2002


    Stares slack-jawed at screen for several seconds.

    Blinks a few times because having stared so raptly at the screen throughout the entire last post without blinking, my contact lenses have started to stick.

    Snaps mouth shut.

    Ponders on reply to make to this story that was just so powerful, and beautiful in it's dark, twisted way.

    I LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT LOVED IT!!!!!

    Elli, that was simply marvelous. When Luke said that he hated her because had circumstances been different he might have loved her...WOW. And that kiss!! Major kerwalops of the heart!

    Magnifique, ma chere!

    Applauds enthusiastically.

    I'm so glad to see you back in the land of fanfiction!!!
     
  12. DARTH_MARIANA

    DARTH_MARIANA Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 2, 2004
    So at the end Luke killed her! :eek: That was the most wonderful interpratation af a Dark Luke that I've ever read! Great story!

    ~*Mariana*~
     
  13. vader_incarnate

    vader_incarnate Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 29, 2002
    *grins* I'm so glad y'all enjoyed this segment -- I wasn't satisfied, but knew I had to post it before I totally changed my mind. I'll indulge my urge to revise at some later point in time. [face_blush]

    You know, this is the first multi-part story I've finished at the JC. EVER. [face_shocked] :D :D Better yet, second post in two days. Amazing, considering how I usually write. *is very gosh-durned happy ...*

    Okay, reader responses ...



    Bri - He's so cold, so calculating, and Mara is just as fiery as ever. It's an odd contrast that works well here.

    I was really worried that I didn't have her fiery enough, actually. [face_blush] It took a bunch o' edits before I could get myself satisfied with that; I kept wondering if it was too rushed, if the pacing was off, etc. :p Good thing for you you weren't online, babe -- I probably would have made you read it for me, too.


    RM - You really like dark stuff, don't you?

    *laughs* Aye -- it gives me a chance to go insane with the prose. o_O I write humor too, don't worry; promised myself I'd churn out something happy before April Fool's. ;)

    so glad Luke didn't really end up like that. He was creepier than Vader and Palpy put together.

    I'm happy our Luke is nice and huggable. *huggies* [face_love] It's the farmboy charm, gotta love it. Vader ... gosh, Vader's evil, but classy evil, and that's one of the things I adore about him. Palpy ... really creeps me out. [face_plain] :p


    oba - :D So glad you liked it, dearheart! *grins* So amazing that I've actually finished one, aye? o_O In all honesty, one of the reasons I wrote this was to see if I could up my count of :_|s ... I don't keep a count, but I know I'm way behind you, babe. ;) Ah well. I'll try harder next time.


    ThePariah - That kiss---!!! *fans self*

    *puzzled* Was the kiss really that intense? :p I've been interrogating random people about whether or not it qualified as "PG smutlet" ... at least it didn't merit the cold shower Empress' fic did. ;) I can live with that. Thanks!

    Elli, you are a genius. A mad, mad, mad genius.

    [face_devil] Yay, go me!


    DarthIshtar - [face_shocked] [face_shocked] [face_shocked] [face_shocked]

    Stars, you're Empress' old Master! Such an honor! *grins broadly* Thanks!


    LP - Blinks a few times because having stared so raptly at the screen throughout the entire last post without blinking, my contact lenses have started to stick.

    Don't you just hate that feeling? 8-}

    Elli, that was simply marvelous. When Luke said that he hated her because had circumstances been different he might have loved her...WOW. And that kiss!! Major kerwalops of the heart!

    *points up to other comment* Again with the kiss! Stars, I'm amazed you guys liked it so much! :) It's good on me, mostly because I've actually kissed a boy twice and it's never been all that good ...

    *notices staring*

    Okay. Focus = away from Elli's love life now. Moving on. *turns camera away*

    Thanks, LP! :) It's the closet romantic in me, I guess. [face_blush] I'm a such a zealot of the whole undying love no matter the circumstances cliché, I swear ... I usually just hide it pretty well ... ;) Thank you!


    DARTH_MARIANA - So at the end Luke killed her! That was the most wonderful interpratation af a Dark Luke that I've ever read! Great story!

    *grins* Actually ... I don't know if he killed her or not. [face_devil] The nice thing about the ending is that I'm left open to write a sequel if the plot bunnies become absolutely unmerciful ... and greatest interpretation of a Dark Luke? [face_blush] Thank you!
     
  14. vader_incarnate

    vader_incarnate Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 29, 2002
    *pokes to top*

    And fie, I say! :p I'll work on the bloody depressing, oba, watch ... ;) "Deliciously dark" sounds wonderful, too, though ...



    (If you're not oba and you're wondering ... I'll explain later. :))
     
  15. leia_naberrie

    leia_naberrie Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 10, 2002
    PART II

    [thwacks Mara on the head] You just had to say 'No', didn't you? :mad: Because where you live, drop-dead gorgeous, totally powerful Sith Lords that propose to women that want to kill them are a dime a dozen? :mad:

    <Re-reads post>

    What! :eek: He kills... me? :eek:

    Kill him Mara! Gore out his eyes with your nails! He doesn't deserve redemption! [face_mischief]


    PART III

    Inspired! :eek: :eek: :eek: There's torture and nookie in the same post! :) And the end was just perrrrrrfect!

    EDIT:

    LOL at Ish's 'coroner's report'!
     
  16. Jayden112233

    Jayden112233 Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Sep 21, 2003
    *grins* Actually ... I don't know if he killed her or not. The nice thing about the ending is that I'm left open to write a sequel if the plot bunnies become absolutely unmerciful ...

    *jumps up and down excitedly* A possible sequel??? And Luke might not have killed his "toy". Well, a Mara fan can only hope. 8-}

    This was a fabulous story. I hope you do write a sequel, but regardless I will be looking forward to your next fic.
     
  17. DarthIshtar

    DarthIshtar Chosen One star 10

    Registered:
    Mar 26, 2001
    Yeah, I agree. The line about hating her for that one reason was so true to form, so tragic.
     
  18. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    "Whatever shall I do with you, dear?" he mused, ignoring her poisonous glowering. "It would be a shame to kill you, because then you'd be all gone ... but, still, it'd be so much fun."

    WOW! VaderLVR is blown away! Amazing story, Luke was just so darn evil! The ending was horrible and wonderful all at the same time. Okay, off to cry now, and you promised tissues so better get moving!
     
  19. kayladie97

    kayladie97 Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 6, 2003
    :eek: :eek: :eek: That was just...just...WOW! Sometimes when I read a story on these boards and it is SO good and SO incredible, I wonder what the heck I am doing trying to write fanfic! I couldn't come close to how wonderfully horrifying this is! (That's a compliment, really! :p )

    As a HUGE Luke fan, I have to tell myself that stories like this are only make-believe! It didn't really happen! But that doesn't make my awe at what a story you wrought any less.

    The kiss was incredible...not just because of passionate intensity, perhaps, but because we ache for knowing what could have been, what should have been, right along with Luke...and Mara, for that matter.

    I liked Mara's disjointed thoughts about Luke's scent, his hair, his chest...very nicely done. Me, I think he killed her (much as that pains me!) because it's what he seemed to be leading up to as he talked about things that he "had no right to feel" and didn't understand. :( But if you want to show us the alternate ending, I will be happy to read it! :D

    Fantastic, fantastic job!

    :) :) :)
     
  20. DARTH_MARIANA

    DARTH_MARIANA Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Mar 2, 2004
    Please let there be a sequel!
     
  21. vader_incarnate

    vader_incarnate Force Ghost star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 29, 2002
    *sheepish grin* I'll respond to comments in a jiffy, but the handmaidens were discussing random things in a chatroom -- here are the results of our obsessiveness ...



    Random Stats -
    • Story started - March 4

    • Finished(ish) - March 15

    • 14 pages (1 inch margins, 12-pt Times New Roman)

    • 7010 words

    • 624 lines of text

    • 148 paragraphs

    • 528 commas

    • 113 occurrences of ?...?

    • 56 occurrences of ?--?

    • 55 italics

    Smiley Count (as of 44 posts)
    • [face_shocked] - 19

    • :D - 16

    • 8-} - 13

    • ;) - 8

    • :) - 6

    • :( - 5

    • [face_blush] - 4

    • [face_laugh] - 4

    • [face_love] - 3

    • [face_mischief] - 3

    • [face_devil] - 2

    • :mad: - 2

    • :_| - 2

    • :cool: - 1


    *is oddly proud of the shock factor* I have to work harder on the cry value, though ... ;)
     
  22. LadyPadme

    LadyPadme Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 26, 2002


    Elli, you're such a nut :p
     
  23. EmilieDarklighter

    EmilieDarklighter Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 19, 2002
    I LOVE THIS STORY!
     
  24. Jedi Trace

    Jedi Trace Former RSA star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Dec 15, 1999
    That has to be the most disturbing L/M fic I've ever read - I actually got a little queasy. (And it takes a LOT to make me queasy. ;))

    Leaves to go watch the end of ROTJ.....repeatedly. 8-}
     
  25. EmilieDarklighter

    EmilieDarklighter Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 19, 2002
    First page, first page...must stay on the first page.

    I printed this out today. The computer messed up and printed it three times. :D More yumminess for me!
     
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