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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Story [Sherlock] Perhaps It's Elementary (UDC 5 & UDC 4) UPDATED 02/04/2012!

Discussion in 'Non Star Wars Fan Fiction' started by Idrelle_Miocovani, Sep 6, 2010.

  1. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    FelsGoddess
    Can't imagine why not.

    Clearly human heads are supposed to be found in the fridge on a regular basis... :p

    Quick, the ego is going to suffocate us all.

    HELP! 8-}

    Glad you're enjoying! :D


    Mar
    OMG, Sherlock is actually nice? shock That's rather touching, really.

    Well, he's not a complete monster, he's a high-functioning sociopath. :p Actually, that dialogue in "Fixed" is supposed to be tinged with a hint of "I am not going to have two lovebirds in my flat, I need to concentrate" thing, so he wasn't just doing it for John, but for his own peace of mind. :p If he can have a peace of mind, that is...

    Note the difference, John.

    It's a very important difference. :p When I wrote that line, I was remembering a quote that one of my friends from highschool put down in her year book when we graduated: "I'm not wrong, I've just found one thousand ways that don't work." I have no idea where that comes from, but for some reason I've always remembered it. :p

    Hilarious!

    Yeah: picture Sherlock smashing up mugs as an experiment for something-or-other. It's a rather funny mental image. :p

    Oooh, Mycroft! Of course he has a weird effect on people, he's played by Mark Gatiss!

    I know! I bloody well thought he was Moriarty when I first saw him. I was totally taken in by that red herring. [face_laugh]

    This is SO getting made into a comic...

    Comic numero deux? [face_batting] I can't wait to see it! :D

    I can totally picture the slightly puzzled expression on Sherlock's face as he says this...

    Oh yes. So can I. 8-}

    PS: re comics - I'll be indexing them at the top of the thread as you create them, just 'cause that's cool. :cool: [face_peace]


    earlybird
    Thanks! :D They're a hoot to write! :D




    [blockquote][b]VIII[/b][/blockquote]

    [b]Ducks[/b]

    There were no ducks in the duck pond. Sherlock said that was how he knew that Katherine Kirkland was not the murderer. Lestrade said that there was no way that the no ducks in the duck pond situation was linked to the murder, but then Sherlock proved it flat out ? it had something to do with duck droppings. John wasn?t quite sure ? he had been out of town for most of the investigation. This was a perfect example of when he really had no idea what was going on.

    ?Ducks?? he said later.

    ?Don?t you know, John? Everything?s about ducks.?


    [b]Money[/b]

    John would never have said that it was easy adjusting to living with a man like Sherlock, but after several months he began to take things as they were ? like Sherlock playing the violin very loudly at three o?clock in the morning, his very bizarre experiments and the continual mess. However, even after all this time, there was still one thing that perplexed John: Sherlock never asked for money ? he essentially did his job for free. How did he support himself? Where did his money come from?

    Then again, maybe that explained why John always ended up buying the food.


    [b]Uncle[/b]

    There were times when Lestrade would tell Sherlock off and that would instigate an argument between Detective Inspector and Consulting Detective that could last for hours ? or days. If they were interrupted, they would just pick up where they left off. It was a strange relationship: Sherlock annoyed Lestrade, yet Lestrade respected him. And despite how much Sherlock was irritated by the police, there was also some hesitant respect for Lestrade.

    In some ways, Lestrade was like an uncle.

    Which was a very strange observation, John realized, and he decided to keep it to himself. They probably wouldn?t appreciate it.


    [b]Gizmo[/b]

    ?Would you stop that racket?!?

    ?What? I?m playing the violin.?

    ?Exactly. And it?s three o?clock in the morning, Sherlock! I don?t want to have to wake up because you?re playing Bach?s bloody first sonata on some musical? [i]gizmo!?[/i]

    ?It?s a violin, not a gizmo, John, and it?s not Bach?s first sonata, it?s Bach?s second partita in D minor.? Sherlock put his bow to the strings, as if he were going to start playing again.

    John g
     
  2. Mar17swgirl

    Mar17swgirl Chosen One star 7

    Registered:
    Dec 26, 2000
    But of course. There is no point for Sherlock in being nice if it can't serve a higher purpose. :p

    Me too! :p

    [image=http://images.cheezburger.com/completestore/2010/9/10/4e04aaf2-a8e6-496d-b767-7694027fe3fc.jpg]

    :p

    That's so nice and fitting. :) And like Moffat said, if Sherlock wasn't around, it would probably be the "DI Lestrade show", as he was apparently one of the best detectives in the police.

    You know, you're seriously limiting my-- our scene choice for the planned Sherlock fic. :p

    Then again, we can always have Sherlock play a different piece... [face_whistling]
     
  3. Mar17swgirl

    Mar17swgirl Chosen One star 7

    Registered:
    Dec 26, 2000
    I've just realised I haven't addressed this issue:

    "Indefinitely" would make sense if Lestrade asked "how long?". But he asked "how many times?", so that's why it didn't make much sense to me. :p

    Sorry, I'm applying mathematical logic to real life again... :p
     
  4. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    [face_laugh] [:D]

    Well, I'm not perfect 100% of the time ( not that I wouldn't like to believe that [face_batting] :p ), but English is funny like that. Not everything matches up in the correct grammatical form, especially dialogue. Talk to my sister about it sometime - she's making her living off of studying how people talk. Which is why she gets annoyed with our grandparents whenever they insist that everything be perfectly grammatically correct all the time, because that's not consistent with the way people actually talk. Example: "Turn off the lights" instead of "Take away the lights" (which is what my sister's boyfriend says, apparently it's a Trinidadian habit) or "take this to her" versus "bring this to her", or "Can I do xyz?" versus "May I do xyz?". Which is why you can answer "how many times?" with "Indefinitely" because even though it's not perfect wording (as your mathematical mind jumped on :p ), the meaning is still there and is understandable.

    I'm rotten at explaining this, I need my sister. [face_laugh] 8-}

    Well, this has been an interesting conversation, I must say. :-B

    But of course. There is no point for Sherlock in being nice if it can't serve a higher purpose.

    Naturally. :cool:

    Me too!

    My housemate wasn't. :p She doesn't know enough about Holmesian literature to know about Moriarty (she only really knows the 2009 film, and even though Moriarty was in that, she wouldn't connect the two in this case). So, as soon as Mycroft pointed out the thing about John's left hand in "A Study in Pink", she went, "Oh boy, he's Sherlock's twin brother, right?"

    I was a little surprised. [face_laugh] "Twin, no, but close enough." :p

    I see what you did there.

    Well, I saw the prompt - "Duck" - and went, "Oh! No ducks in the duck pond... DOCTOR WHO!" And then all I could think about what Doctor Who, so I went, "what the hell, I'll just put in a DW reference, like the Moffat fan I am." :p

    And like Moffat said, if Sherlock wasn't around, it would probably be the "DI Lestrade show", as he was apparently one of the best detectives in the police.

    Absolutely. If Sherlock wasn't there, Lestrade would be the best detective in London. :cool:

    Plus I love this version of Lestrade. [face_love]

    You know, you're seriously limiting my-- our scene choice for the planned Sherlock fic.

    Don't you know, Mar? My mind is unlimited in the way that it can twist and turn any type of scene. ;) We'll be good for our collab, trust me. :cool:

    :p


     
  5. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    IX


    Murder

    John began to wonder whether or not they would have a case that had nothing to do with murder. Sherlock loved murder mysteries; he jumped up and down whenever they caught wind of a serial killer. But after a while, when the streets of London seemed to become bloodier and dirtier than the open, dusty plains of Afghanistan, John began to doubt if there were any nice, ordinary, non-homicidal people out there.

    ?Where would the fun be in that?? Sherlock said.

    ?I think I?m going to ignore that. Murder?s not fun.?

    ?If you didn?t think so, you wouldn?t be here.?


    Mystery

    ?And it has nothing to do with the string of homicides you?ve been following??

    ?No, not at all.?

    ?Seriously? Are you sure a murder hasn?t slipped in here or there with this case??

    ?There are no murders in this case, John. It?s a mystery. A stolen artefact. Very valuable. The private owner wants it back as soon as possible, most likely because it?s actually a black-market relic and he has a buyer who will be very upset if he doesn?t deliver it soon.?

    ?Huh. Black market??

    ?Yes.?

    ?Why do I have the feeling this will turn into a murder mystery??


    Writer

    ?I thought you said nothing happened to you,? Harriet said during dinner one evening. ?But look at you now! This blog of yours ? you?re turning into quite the writer, John. I?m proud of you.?

    John smiled hesitantly. ?Nice of you to say, Harry.?

    Harriet grinned. ?Of course! I?m always nice, aren?t I? You should get those stories published. Think about the money you could make! They?d be really popular, I can tell. And then I?d be able to tell everyone that my brother?s not just a doctor and a war hero, but a bestselling author!?

    ?Uh? maybe not yet, Harry.?


    Retired

    ?Sherlock, what would happen if you ever gave up all this detective stuff??

    ?I?d be bored.?

    ?No, I meant, what will happen when you retire??

    ?Don?t be stupid John, I?m not going to retire.?

    ?Okay.?

    ?Retirement is for lazy people.?

    ?You?re lazy all the time.?

    ?I am not! When am I lazy??

    ?Never mind. Okay, thirty years from now, when you are retired??

    ?I?m not going to be retired.?

    ?Hypothetically speaking.?

    ?Very well. I?ll spend my life spray painting smilies on my drawing room wall and using them for target practice.?

    ?? you wouldn?t make a very good retiree.?


    Teacher

    If you thought the world was full of idiots, then it made sense to try to stop the world from being full of idiots by teaching them to not? well? be idiots. Sherlock often complained how no one could keep up with him. It was a constant thorn in his side, a grievance that would never go away.

    When John irritably suggested that Sherlock teach the idiots how not to be idiots, he regarded John disdainfully and said that idiots were born, not taught.

    John decided that even if he were given the chance, Sherlock would be a lousy teacher.




    [blockquote][b]X[/b][/blockquote]

    [b]Captain[/b]

    Lestrade considered himself to be a good leader, a good captain of his team. On a good day, he led his team to the best of his ability and they solved the case. On a bad day, he regularly wondered how he could possibly be a good captain when he couldn?t even figured out if a murder was a murder or a suicide.

    Bad days happened much more frequently than good days. On bad days, Sherlock Holmes made a fool out of them all.

    And then Lestrade had to do the press conference and he remembered why he was captain.


    [b]Pilot[/b]

    ?Have you even moved at all today??

    ?Move? who needs to move, moving?s boring.?

    John checked the kitchen. It was still clean from the last time he had washed dishes. ?You haven?t eaten, either, I take it.?

    ?This is much more fascinating than eating.?

    ?Sherlock, you need to eat.?

    ?I?m working! I don?t eat when I?m working!?

    John walked over to him and unplugged the television set. ?No, Sherlock,? he said. ?This isn?t working. [i]This[/i] is playing lousy, mindless video games.?

    ?Put that back on, I was just about to win level thirty-three!?

    ?Oh, good God, you?ve
     
  6. Mar17swgirl

    Mar17swgirl Chosen One star 7

    Registered:
    Dec 26, 2000
    [face_laugh] Yeah, I went *headdesk* at the end of the episode for not catching that little detail. :oops: And I particularly liked the banter in The Great Game:

    Sherlock: "How's Sarah, John? How was the LiLo?"
    Mycroft: (matter-of-factly) "Sofa, Sherlock, it was the sofa..."
    Sherlock: (looks John up and down) "Oh yes, of course."
    John: "How-- oh, never mind."

    :p

    Me too! [face_love] Rupert Graves is very handsome. I knew him from Ashes to Ashes.

    LOL, touché, Sherlock. :p

    [face_laugh]

    [face_laugh] :_| [face_laugh] This is pure comic material! :D
     
  7. FelsGoddess

    FelsGoddess Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Sep 5, 2004
    Which was a very strange observation, John realized, and he decided to keep it to himself. They probably wouldn?t appreciate it.
    Probably not. :p

    ?Very well. I?ll spend my life spray painting smilies on my drawing room wall and using them for target practice.?
    [face_laugh] Sounds like fun.

    ?Put that back on, I was just about to win level thirty-three!?
    ?Oh, good God, you?ve become a gamer.?

    [face_laugh]

    =D=
     
  8. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Mar
    Oh, yes, I love that exchange. Mark Gatiss is wonderful as Mycroft (and he's a pretty excellent writer, too). [face_love]

    Rupert Graves is very handsome. I knew him from Ashes to Ashes.

    Aha, I need to watch that sometime.

    This is pure comic material!

    I actually had a different drabble written for that one; basically, John buys Sherlock a set of video games in an attempt to keep him occupied when he's bored. It was mostly narrative, and I decided to change it to dialogue to make it more fun. :D


    FelsGoddess
    Probably not.

    I'd imagine they wouldn't look fondly on it. :p

    Sounds like fun.

    Naturally. ;)

    I'm glad you're enjoying! [:D]




    [b][blockquote]XI[/blockquote][/b]

    [b]Office[/b]

    ?Maybe you need to get an office.?

    ?This is my office.?

    ?This is our drawing room! It can?t be your office, all right?!?

    ?Why not??

    ?Because it?s my room, too!?

    ?Get your own drawing room. Most of my stuff is here anyway.?

    ?Exactly. You really need to clean up, I?m tired of tripping over your? what is this??

    ?Put that back!?

    ?Is this a???

    ?Yes, now put it back!?

    ?This is why you need an office ? to put all of your insane things.?

    ?I don?t need an office, I?m not an office person. Offices have secretaries. I hate secretaries.?


    [b]Sales[/b]

    ?Mrs Hudson, what are you doing??

    ?Getting rid of some of your old things, Sherlock. You needed to clear out that room??

    ?Did John tell you to do that??

    ?No, of course not, dear, I know a mess when I see one. Haven?t I always told you that you make too much of a mess??

    ?That?s not the point! The point is you?re throwing out my things!?

    ?It?s not like you?re using them, dear.?

    ?I am! Now put them back! Bloody hell, this isn?t the Sale of Sherlock Holmes? Luxury Items, I want everything back where you found them!?


    [b]Accounting[/b]

    ?Don?t you even look at your bills, Sherlock??

    ?No. I am not an accountant.?

    ?Accounting has nothing to do with it ? you need to keep track of this stuff.?

    ?I don?t have the time. It?s boring. Can I borrow your phone??

    ?What? NO! For the love of God, stop borrowing my phone, you?re running me up a huge bill!?

    ?I?ll pay you back.?

    ?Pay your own phone bill.?

    ?I don?t like bills.?

    ?No one does, that doesn?t mean you can ignore them. Where is your phone??

    ?Bills are for accountants. It?s upstairs, which is why I wanted to borrow yours.?


    [b]Management[/b]

    221B Baker Street was a mess. It was always a mess. John had a feeling that wherever Sherlock lived, a mess surrounded him until it took over the entire flat. Sherlock had no sense of what it was to keep things organized, but he did have a good sense of management. Somehow, in the chaos of old books and paper and pens and the odd microscope or two, everything had its place. He always knew exactly where everything was as long as no one touched it. It wasn?t as though his stuff was unmanageable. It was just Sherlock?s manageable chaos.


    [b]Temp[/b]

    ?Well, Yorick, what do you think? Was it the sister or the brother??

    Yorick grinned.

    ?Yes, that?s what I was thinking. The sister had the green scarf, but the brother had access to the arsenic. So they killed their cousin together and then provided each other with alibis.?

    Yorick grinned.

    ?But there has to be something more than that??

    Yorick grinned.

    ?But what could it be? And why would they kill their cousin? Money was not an incentive, they?re not involved with gangs??

    Yorick grinned.

    Sherlock glared at him.

    ?And you?re a terrible conversationalist. Where?s John when you need him??
     
  9. Mar17swgirl

    Mar17swgirl Chosen One star 7

    Registered:
    Dec 26, 2000
    Hooooold on a moment, you mean you never saw Life On Mars or Ashes To Ashes? :eek: You never experienced the hunky sexiness that is Gene Hunt? :eek:

    Right, I'm going to make you watch it.

    [face_laugh] I don't think I want to know what that was... :p

    Of course he hates secretaries. Imagine Sherlock with a secretary. 8-}

    Aww, he's just like me! [face_love]

    :p

    That one was the best! [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] Yorick temping to cover for John. How the roles changed... :p
     
  10. Storms_Legacy

    Storms_Legacy Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 29, 2007
    I have never seen this show before, but I think I'm going to have to now. These drabbles are amazing - and hilarious! I couldn't stop reading them, and nearly all of them made me laugh. Awesome job, Idri! I'll be keeping an eye out for more of these for sure.
     
  11. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Mar
    You never experienced the hunky sexiness that is Gene Hunt?

    I have now. [face_love]

    Though I like the sexiness of John Simm in that leather jacket even more. [face_love] [face_love]

    Right, I'm going to make you watch it.

    Go figure! [face_laugh]

    I don't think I want to know what that was...

    You don't. You reeaaally don't. :p

    Of course he hates secretaries. Imagine Sherlock with a secretary.

    In an alternative dimension, maybe... [face_laugh]

    Aww, he's just like me!

    Why am I not surprised? o_O

    Actually, that paragraph is based on my own... er... management difficulties. :p I'm a ridiculously clean person, but I make one hell of a mess with my school stuff. Everything has its pile around my room. Organized chaos. My dad keeps trying to stop it, but it never works. [face_laugh]

    That one was the best! laugh laugh laugh Yorick temping to cover for John. How the roles changed...

    This is the one out of all the ones I've written so far that amuses me the most. :p I decided to start calling the skull Yorick not because of my drama background, but because my sister has a skull for school that she called Yorick until she and her partner realised that it was a female skull... and then they just called it The Skull. I suggested Yoricka, but that didn't catch on. Still, it's better than the delightful originality of The Skull. :p


    Storms_Legacy
    You NEED to watch it! I have links. PM me if you need them. [face_batting] Though it will be having its American broadcast in October. :) I'm glad you're enjoying them! :D They're wonderful fun to write. [face_batting]




    [blockquote][b]XII[/b][/blockquote]

    [b]Terrorists[/b]

    The explosion had shocked the police as much as it had the public. Sherlock was, as always, unperturbed as Lestrade?s team ran here and there, pursuing as many leads as they could.

    ?Terrorist groups? it has to be? only they would target that building??

    ?It?s not terrorists,? Sherlock said loudly.

    ?How do you know?? Lestrade asked.

    Sherlock leaned back in his chair. ?It?s our friendly neighbourhood bomber.?

    ?What ? Moriarty??

    ?Maybe,? Sherlock said. ?He?s back for more. Back to make me dance again.? He held out a phone. ?The bomb was to get our attention. Now the real danger begins.?


    [b]Deadline[/b]

    ?Twenty minutes, Sherlock.?

    ?I know, I know! I can do this in twenty minutes! I can do it in less! Just ? [i]give me time.?[/i]

    ?I am giving you time. Moriarty?s time. We?re stuck playing by his rules, and his rules say you figure this out in twenty minutes or we?ll have a dozen people dead and their blood will be on our hands.?

    ?My hands, Lestrade. Not yours, mine. This one is for me. I?ve got to solve it. It?s my problem, not yours, and frankly you wouldn?t be able to anyway. Twenty minutes. I can do this.?

    ?You better.?


    [b]Jack[/b]

    The playing card arrived in a white envelope. There was no name on it, but they all knew who it was addressed to. No one would send the police something like that.

    It was the Jack of Hearts. Sherlock picked it up, staring at it. There was something written in pencil the back.

    [i]?The big fish dances.? [/i]

    ?What?s that supposed to mean?? John asked.

    Sherlock put down the card. ?It?s a clue,? he said. ?This isn?t the Jack of Hearts, it?s the Page of Cups.? He withdrew his phone and accessed the Internet. ?I need to find a tarot deck.?


    [b]Defiant[/b]

    ?So, how did I do, Sherlock? Have I become your arch-nemesis yet, or does that position still belong to your brother??

    Sherlock watched him with narrowed eyes. ?If that?s supposed to be threatening, your threats need work.?

    ?You haven?t answered my question. Or are you too defiant for that??

    ?I don?t answer to murderers.?

    ?Oh, but this was never about the murders.? He laughed. ?We know that, you and I both. It?s all about the game, but the game will only be exciting when there are lives at stake. That?s where the fun is. That?s where you get your rush.?


    [b]24[/b]

    Twenty-four hours and it was all over. Again. Somehow, miraculously, they both stumbled back to their flat, went up t
     
  12. Mar17swgirl

    Mar17swgirl Chosen One star 7

    Registered:
    Dec 26, 2000
    Ahh... Moriarty... [face_devil]

    [face_laugh]

    Love this! :D
     
  13. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Aug 21, 2006
    Great sets and now really interested in Sherlock=D==D==D=
     
  14. FelsGoddess

    FelsGoddess Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Sep 5, 2004
    Sale of Sherlock Holmes? Luxury Items,
    [face_laugh] Browsing such a sale would certainly be entertaining.

    ?Bills are for accountants. It?s upstairs, which is why I wanted to borrow yours.?
    *agrees*

    I have got to watch this show. :p
     
  15. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Thanks for reading, everyone! [:D]




    [blockquote][b]XIII[/b][/blockquote]

    [b]Enterprise[/b]

    ?Have you ever actually considered becoming a detective??

    ?What do you mean? I [i]am[/i] a detective.?

    ?No, I mean a real one.?

    ?Oh. You mean a paid one.? Sherlock frowned. ?Police forces don?t do it for me. Too many regulations. Too many offices. Too much paperwork. And they?re stuffed full of idiots. It?s much more fun this way.?

    ?I would never have guessed.?

    ?Call it an endeavour in active deduction?

    ?An endeavour??

    ?A plan.? Sherlock opened his laptop and logging on to his email.

    ?Right.?

    ?Venture, if you will.?

    ?Sure.?

    ?How do you feel about a triple homicide??

    ?Sounds great.?


    [b]Galaxy[/b]

    ?I don?t see the point of having this argument again!?

    ?But how can you not know the most basic facts about our planet? There?s a whole world outside this one, Sherlock; you might not be all that interested in it, but it?s there and it?s??

    ?What? Important? How is the bloody galaxy important and why should I care if it?s infinitely expanding? How does that affect me and the work I do? Will the great big galaxy somehow gloriously help me solve a case by writing the murderer?s name in the stars? No, it won?t!?

    Sherlock stalked off angrily.


    [b]Federation[/b]

    ?I see you have a fan club.?

    ?I?ve a what??

    ?A fan club. How do you get a fan club??

    ?People must be reading the website.?

    ?Have you even looked at your website forum recently??

    ?No, why??

    Twenty minutes later, Sherlock was considering pulling the website altogether.

    ?Idiots everywhere!? he shouted. ?The sheer [i]stupidity[/i] they are spreading on my website, pretending that they are as intelligent and observant as me.?

    ?I don?t know why you?re surprised; fans generally aren?t all that intelligent.?

    ?It?s bloody offensive! They?re like a? a group, or a gang, or a? or an alliance! It?s awful!?


    [b]Next[/b]

    ?Next.?

    John read off the next case file.

    ?Next.?

    John read the next one. And the next. And the next.

    ?Oh GOD this place is boring!? Sherlock finally complained, throwing himself down on the couch. He picked up his violin and played a chromatic scale as fast as he could. ?Why can?t there be anything interesting going on? This is bloody London, there?s always criminal activity! Why do I always have to wait for them to develop brains??

    John closed the file folder and put it away.

    The violin screeched through the flat for the next hour and a half.


    [b]Generation[/b]

    Sherlock sometimes complained that youngsters these days weren?t half as brilliant as youngsters had been when he was a kid. Then he complained that older men and women weren?t brilliant either. In fact, there was no one out there who had an ounce of brilliance anymore.

    ?That?s a bit depressing,? John commented.

    ?There?s a large cloud of idiocy on this generation?s police forces,? Sherlock said lightly.

    ?Oh? so you were just talking about the police, then??

    ?Of course, what did you think I was talking about? The criminals are much smarter nowadays than they used to be. Kudos to them.?
     
  16. Mar17swgirl

    Mar17swgirl Chosen One star 7

    Registered:
    Dec 26, 2000
    I love the matter-of-fact tone they both use here. :p As if they're deciding what to have for dinner. :p


    [face_laugh] Trust Sherlock to get offended by his worshippers! :p

    Poor John... :p

    Thank God we still have smart criminals, eh, Sherlock?o_O


    Another fantastic set of drabbles, Idri! =D=
     
  17. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Thanks, Mar! :D [:D]

    I love the matter-of-fact tone they both use here. tongue As if they're deciding what to have for dinner.

    Actually, I just had a funny mental image of Sherlock holding a fancy dinner menu that had a list of various types of murders on it... and the price tag attached to it. 8-} My mind is a very scary place these days. [face_plain]

    Trust Sherlock to get offended by his worshippers!

    Naturally. ;)

    Poor John...

    I know how he feels, considering my upstairs neighbours - but they aren't nearly as smart or classy as Sherlock. No violin, just lots and lots of rap music and the occasional horror movie at 3:10am. :p

    Thank God we still have smart criminals, eh, Sherlock?

    Of course! If there were no smart criminals, then what would happen? :p




    [blockquote][b]XIV[/b][/blockquote]

    [b]Psychic[/b]

    You ran into a lot of odd people on the streets these days. Some of them were a bit strange; some of them weren?t. But there was one woman they met who loudly proclaimed that she was a psychic. Sherlock let her predict his future just to get her to shut up.

    She babbled something out about him working with the police and that he had a mortal enemy who would one day get the better of him.

    ?And that?s the power of the psychic,? Sherlock said later. He pointed to a newspaper. ?They?re slightly observant and they can read.?


    [b]Detective[/b]

    ?He?s not even a proper detective,? Sergeant Donovan said. ?He just shows up whenever he?s needed.?

    ?But it?s true that he solves cases for the police,? the reporter said.

    ?Yes ? no ? well?? Donovan paused and bit her lip, looking like she didn?t know how to respond. ?He does. He helps ? but only a little bit. He?s a consultant, he doesn?t do the work for us.?

    ?Well, that?s almost insulting,? Sherlock said after seeing the interview on the telly. ?I?d be upset, except? well? it?s [i]Donovan[/i] who said it and, frankly, it?s beneath me to get upset at anything she says.?


    [b]Fraud[/b]

    Sherlock was an amazing actor when he needed to be. He could trick anyone, given the right incentive. John had seen him order a glass of wine at a restaurant, throw it on his face, and then ask the restaurant?s owner to toss him out, all for the sake of the act.

    It was practically fraudulent, the way he deceived people. Of course, it didn?t matter ? the people he tricked were either criminals, who were then caught, or Lestrade, who adamantly ignored him. It was a shame, in some ways: he could have had a brilliant career in the theatre.


    [b]Awareness[/b]

    John heard it again and again ? normal people heard, but didn?t listen. They saw, but they didn?t look. They missed things. Sherlock could claim back and forth and up and down that he was the most intelligent man on the planet ? sometimes his arrogance did get the better of him ? but after a while, John knew that it wasn?t so much his brilliant [i]intelligence[/i], but his ability to be exceptionally aware. It was his keen, penetrating awareness that allowed him to deduce the most complex results.

    Although Sherlock was also very, very smart. Just not about anything he deemed trivial.


    [b]Pharmaceutical[/b]

    Barely a week passed when John wasn?t tempted to get rid of the stacks of nicotine patches Sherlock had hidden in cupboards all over the flat. He wondered how much money Sherlock spent on the things. The man was addicted; it sometimes unnerved John to see him wandering about the flat with a strange, keen glare in his eye and three or more patches stuck to his arm.

    One patch he could deal with. Four was bloody insane.

    He?d take any amount of playing the violin at absurd hours over seeing Sherlock when he had four patches on ever again.

    [hr]

    Note: ?Choose any (non-"Author's Choice") challenge set from UDC3 or UDC4.? So, this set comes from UDC4, Week 7.

    [blockquote][b]XV[/b][/blockquote]

    [b]No Turning Back[/b]

    ?Come on, John!?

    John ran forwards, following Sherlock into the darkness of the alleyway. They had been running for what seemed like hours now; he had no idea where he w
     
  18. Mar17swgirl

    Mar17swgirl Chosen One star 7

    Registered:
    Dec 26, 2000
    Next comic is up! :D

    [image=http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c251/Tauriel/Sherlock/sherlock_comic_02.jpg]
     
  19. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Mar, you just made my insanely crazy, dramatastic evening a lot better. [:D] [:D]

    I love it. [face_love] [face_laugh] :_| [face_laugh]

    PS. Due to my dramatastic plans, I won't be updating again until probably Monday, people. :p (Though I'm sure NSWFF could do with the rest ;) ). Things are insane here right now. 8-} Please enjoy Mar's awesome artwork in the meanwhile. [face_peace]
     
  20. FelsGoddess

    FelsGoddess Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Sep 5, 2004
    ?Idiots everywhere!? he shouted. ?The sheer stupidity they are spreading on my website, pretending that they are as intelligent and observant as me.? [face_laugh]

    Fraud and Awareness Love the description of his character.

    Great responses!
     
  21. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    Thanks, FelsGoddess! [:D]




    [blockquote][b]XVI[/b][/blockquote]

    [b]Ranger[/b]

    Allison had been completely unremarkable ? big hair, makeup-coated eyes, scoliosis ? save for the fact that she had been the first girl to hit him. It was a memorable occasion. She had marched up to him, told him he was a friendless, raving lunatic, and gave him a sharp slap across the face.

    All because he had exposed her relationship with Mr Mitchell in the middle of the school cafeteria.

    The funny thing was that many, many years after secondary school, he was still called a raving lunatic and he was still getting slapped, but the friend thing had inevitably changed.


    [b]Cavalier[/b]

    Molly stared at him, her eyes wide. She did that thing (again) where her cheeks would turn red and her eyes would water, and then she would say ?Okay? in that very whispery voice and flee.

    John usually told him off whenever it happened.

    ?You could do with being nicer to her.?

    ?Why? I am nice!?

    ?No, Sherlock, you?re not. She likes you. Show some? interest once in a while, it won?t hurt.?

    ?If I show interest, that would be a lie. She might mistake my meaning. I have no intentions towards her, so why should I lead her on??


    [b]Thief[/b]

    Detective Inspector Lestrade stared at the item of interest on the table. He paused. He looked at Sherlock, who was calmly leaning against the table. He looked at the table again.

    [i]?Why[/i] do you have another one of my IDs?!?

    ?Because.?

    ?Sherlock??

    ?You were annoying me,? he said, ?so I took it.?

    ?I need it back! Do you know how much it costs me whenever I have to replace it??

    ?No idea, but I?m sure it?s just enough to irritate you.?

    ?Exactly! So stop pick-pocketing my IDs!?

    ?Then stop being annoying and I won?t have to pick-pocket your IDs!?


    [b]Acrobat[/b]

    ?What in God?s name are you doing up there??

    ?I really can?t say ? other than I was trying to figure out how hard it was to scale the walls.?

    ?Well, don?t expect me to get you down from the ceiling. You did it yourself, so you?re getting yourself out of the mess.?

    ?Good. Great. Fine. I don?t need any help. None at all.?

    ?? blast it.?

    ?What??

    ?You! You?re always doing that!?

    ?What??

    ?Getting into stupid situations and I?m the one who has to bail you out!?

    ?Ah... Interesting.?

    ?Oh, really."

    ?I suppose that has happened from time to time.?


    [b]Barbarian[/b]

    If there was one thing John could never get used to, it was the body parts that kept showing up in inconvenient places (the fridge, freezer? occasionally the microwave). He could stomach it ? he?d seen enough on the battlefield ? but the final straw came when Mrs Hudson opened the fridge door and? well, her scream could be heard ten blocks away.

    She sounded like she being murdered. John had rushed into the kitchen to find her staring at the severed head.

    ?It?s just a head, Mrs Hudson. Come on, I?ll make you a cup of tea.?

    Silently, he cursed Sherlock.

     
  22. earlybird-obi-wan

    earlybird-obi-wan Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Aug 21, 2006
    Loved the new sets and the comic[face_laugh][face_laugh][face_laugh]
     
  23. Mar17swgirl

    Mar17swgirl Chosen One star 7

    Registered:
    Dec 26, 2000
    Like hell he doesn't... [face_laugh]

    Too true, Sherlock. :p

    Idri!!! [face_love] [face_love] [face_love]



    ...



    [face_love] [face_love] [face_love]

    This totally reminds me of House and his secret stashes of Vicodin hidden around his flat... :p

    Nice to see Sherlock appreciate John's presence. :)

    Teehee. :D

    [face_beatup]

    :p

    Since I find Molly to be both weak and annoying, I fully support Sherlock here. :cool:

    [face_laugh]

    Suuuuure you don't... :p

    This sentence seems kind of redundant and doesn't read right. You just added it to fill the 100-word quota, didn't you? :p

    A cup of tea = instant cure for everything [face_Union_Jack]

    :p
     
  24. Storms_Legacy

    Storms_Legacy Jedi Knight star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 29, 2007
    Those were a great bunch of drabbles, Idri! I have to say, Nowhere to Hide and Thief were probably my favorites out of all of them. These are seriously awesome - you did a great job!
     
  25. Idrelle_Miocovani

    Idrelle_Miocovani Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2005
    earlybird
    Thanks! :D [:D]


    Mar
    Like hell he doesn't...

    Well, obviously. :p

    Too true, Sherlock.

    If anything, it will just annoy her further! [face_laugh] :D

    Idri!!!

    [face_laugh] [:D] See? It pays off to watch the unaired pilot, you get to make references to funny moments from it... :p :D And then Mar is the only one who gets them. 8-}

    This totally reminds me of House and his secret stashes of Vicodin hidden around his flat...

    Why do I get the feeling that you're going to make me watch House after I finish A2A, Jekyll, State of Play (BBC version, obviously) and any other number of British TV programmes you shove in my direction? :p I need to start getting back at you with my own suggestions! [face_laugh] (There are a couple of Canadian programmes I think you should try, actually ;) )

    Nice to see Sherlock appreciate John's presence.

    Well, he does. He just doesn't always show it. :p But it's always nice... :)

    Teehee.

    Yep. :D That phone thing will always be clever... "WRONG!" [face_laugh] Bwhahaha.

    beatup

    tongue


    Imagining young Sherlock is quite hilarious. [face_laugh]

    Since I find Molly to be both weak and annoying, I fully support Sherlock here.

    Me, too. To be honest, she seems more like the character type for a secretarial position or something rather than someone who works in a morgue... I know at least half a dozen people who have taken anatomy classes, and one of them does perform autopsies. And let me tell you, she is downright insane. Brilliant mind, just really crazy, and you do not ever want to go out to eat somewhere with her because her dinner topics are rather gruesome. ANYWAYS, I found Molly's characterisation to be a kind of annoying decision on the part of the writers. :confused: Though I suppose she does provide some amusing incidents throughout the show... :p Or maybe she just acts that way when Sherlock's around. 8-}

    laugh

    I got a kick out of Sherlock using Lestrade's ID in a Study in Pink and his reasoning behind having it... thought I should give it a mention. :p

    Suuuuure you don't...

    Yes, we believe you completely... :p

    This sentence seems kind of redundant and doesn't read right. You just added it to fill the 100-word quota, didn't you?

    Guilty as charged! [face_laugh] I went and changed it since you bugged me into changing it. I don't think it's much better, but there's always one drabble that just annoys you so much that you have to let it just kind of... sit... and be not as well written as some of the others. [face_laugh] 8-}

    A cup of tea = instant cure for everything [face_Union_Jack]

    Well, obviously... :p


    Storms_Legacy
    Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed them! Yes, "Thief" was a lot of fun to write. :D It references one of my favourite parts of the show. :p


    Thanks for reading, everyone! :D [:D]