Beyond SJRS AUGUST CHALLENGE! The Beast Of Black Forest ~ Luke and Mara investigate a mysterious forest.

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by madman007, Sep 4, 2013.

Moderators: Briannakin, mavjade
  1. madman007 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 22, 2007
    star 4
    Here is the beginning of my SJRS Challenge for August. You may be able to tell what fairy tale I'm borrowing by the end of this part. I'm sure you'll find a few twists when I'm done with it. More to come soon.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    SJRS AUGUST CHALLENGE! For this challenge you must take the plot of a classic fairy tale (Grimm or otherwise) and insert Luke and Mara into it.
    You must include the words:

    -Popsicle
    -Catastrophe
    -Pittance

    The Beast Of Black Forest
    Part 1

    Setting: A year after the Yuuzahn Vong War.
    Summary: Luke and Mara are summoned to the Drall System in a small village where a series of disappearances had occurred over the past several decades. The recent disappearance is a ten-year-old boy.

    "How many have gone into the forest to look into this?" was Luke Skywalker's first question to the village's administrator, Ameht Rekko.
    The Drallan man spoke in a local accent saying to Luke, "There have been too numerous to mention. We have hired bounty hunters, investigators, and anyone who was willing to go inside the forest. The rest have been people who went missing for no reason or teenagers daring each other on stupid bets."
    Mara Jade sat beside her husband and asked, "And none of these people have come back out of the forest?"
    Ameht breathed out. "That is correct."
    Luke reiterated, "You want us to go into the Black Forest and investigate what has been happening inside it for several decades and possibly rescue a small boy?"
    Ameht nodded. "Yes. His name is Augest Rekko. He is my nephew. Though he likes to be called Augie. He is very dear to me."
    "Why do you believe we can succeed when so many have failed before?"
    Ameht smiled nervously. "You both are Jedi. Never has a Jedi gone into the forest. I realize that you have been busy during the latest war. We have never thought to bother the Jedi on such a trivial matter. I figured since it is peacetime once again, a simple investigation into a forest would be easy for you."
    "Nothing is easy," said Luke. "Especially when you're dealing with the unknown."
    Mara asked, "Does anyone in your village know exactly what we're dealing with?"
    "There has only been speculation. Since the people who have gone in have never come back, there is no way to tell. The theory is that it is a large animal. Over the years it's been known as the beast."
    Mara looked confused. "Like a rancor?"
    "No. We could hear a rancor. The trouble is that we hear nothing. There is only silence. It sounds weird, but that is what makes this more frightening."
    "I understand," Luke assured. "Tell me, does it ever come out of the forest?"
    Ameht shook his head. "Not that we can tell. We try to live our lives in peace. For all we know, the Beast could be one of us luring people into the forest."
    "How long has your nephew been missing?" asked Luke.
    "A week here on Drall."
    Mara calculated. "That's about five standard Coruscanti days. Anything can happen in that time."
    Ameht's voice turned to panic and he pleaded, "Please, you have to try. I have to know. His family has to know. He only has his older sister and his father. Their mother died giving birth to him. We have grown tired of losing our loved ones simply because they go inside the Black Forest. Yet, we are too afraid to find out ourselves. We cannot face our demons as the Jedi have over the past several years."
    Luke cringed inside at the memory of those they had lost fighting the Vong. He stopped himself just before he remembered his own nephew who died in a battle that Luke ordered. Instead, Luke's memory went to another area. One of happiness. "There were some good things that came out of that war, as well, Admin Rekko." He glanced lovingly at his wife and she smiled with him.
    Ameht said, "Ah yes, your own son. Then you both realize how Augie's family feels. If there are heroes who can bring Augie back alive it is the Jedi."
    Mara replied, "Please don't get all of your hopes up. We haven't assessed the situation yet."
    "But you have to promise to bring him back."
    Luke frowned, not wanting to dash the man's hopes. "We cannot promise that."
    "What can you promise?"
    "Answers," Luke replied. "Regardless, I do appreciate your confidence in us."
    "You will do this?"
    "We will."
    Ameht let out a sigh of relief. "You don't know how much this means to us, Master Skywalker. Thank you both. And, as we discussed, I shall gather your credits in the morning. I'm afraid it is a small pittance compared to what you are used to."
    "Admin Rekko," Luke stated calmly, "I appreciate your desire to compensate us for our efforts. It is not needed. Please, keep your money."
    Ameht smiled proudly. "I was told the Master Jedi was gracious and modest. And, please, call me Ameht. I assume you will want to start your investigation in the morning. It is getting late now."
    "Yes, that would be better, of course," Luke said. "We will need to fetch some equipment from our ship.”
    "Take all the time you need. We have accommodations arranged for you both. My assistant will show you to your quarters. Thank you, again.”
    After Luke and Mara were shown their room, they set out in a speeder taxi back to the spaceport in order to fetch their equipment out of the Jade Shadow. They selected only what they needed, preparing for a few nights of camping if required. Mara locked her ship back up and they went back to their room to rest. Luke went to a nearby restaurant where they sold his favorite Karkan ribenes with tomo spice. He sat at the small table and started eating while Mara sat on the bed with her datapad. She had not said a word since they left Ameht. He noted as she looked at the datapad, "Did you see that drawing that Ben made us? Winter sent it this morning."
    "Oh yes," she said in monotone. "It depicts us being very far away from Ben."
    After a pause and a ribene, Luke licked his fingers and then questioned, "What's wrong, Mara?"
    "Wrong? What could be wrong?"
    "Stop it, Mara. This is me. You've been distant ever since we agreed to investigate what's going on here."
    "You better knock off that 'we' from that sentence."
    "And?"
    "Just wondering what we're doing here is all."
    Luke shrugged. "We're helping those in need. It's what the Jedi do."
    She turned to look at him. "It's what the Jedi used to do before the Vong war. The Jedi Council is in shambles. You know it. Yet, here we are helping villagers with some unknown creature taking their people. Like the war never happened."
    "The war did happen, Mara. I don't have to tell you that. The only way to get back to normal is to do things we used to do. This could turn into a catastrophe, Mara."
    "I'm sure it could. Why couldn't they scan the area from the atmosphere? Or hire a raiding party?"
    "I'm sure they can't afford either. The Drallan government isn't that generous to these small independent villages."
    "Why us, then?"
    "Well, at the risk of sounding egotistical, they wanted the best."
    He managed to make Mara smirk on that as she said, "Maybe. Eh, it's probably some new creature that's taking the people for food."
    "I'm not so sure. I felt something when I focused in on the forest earlier today."
    "Like what?"
    "Something dark."
    "Well, it is called the Black Forest."
    "It's not that simple, Mara. There's a presence of some kind there."
    "Sith?"
    "No. I'm sure of that. Just not much else."
    Mara shut off her datapad and turned down the bed. "Well, I'm tired. Guess we'll find out in the morning."
    "I guess we will."
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    The next morning, Luke and Mara set out on foot with their pack to the Black Forest. They passed by several homes of villagers, of whom some were already up and wishing them luck. They knew what the Jedi were about to do. They came to a small ridge that went down a low grade on a grassy meadow. Drall’s sun shone brightly and gave off pleasant warmth.
    Before them at the bottom of the ridge was the edge of the Black Forest. The trees and land beyond that point were drastically darker than the bright green of the meadow. The darkness of the forest seemed to be endless beyond the horizon.
    “Wow,” Mara muttered, “that is a big forest. There could be anything in there.”
    “That’s what we’re here to find out.”
    “Funny, I thought we were done with searching the unknowns in the galaxy.”
    “If you believe that then you should go back to smuggling.”
    “Oh, there are plenty of unknowns in that business, too.”
    “You should have no problem with adapting, then. If you can’t, you can go back to the luxury of our suite.”
    “Harsh,” she said in mock offense. “I like the new you, Skywalker.”
    “Shades of the old you, Jade.”
    “I still have some of the old Hand in me.”
    “As a former Hand I knew used to say, shut up and get going.”
    They both walked down the low grade and stopped just before the edge of the forest. The villagers built a sign that acted as a warning.
    Abandon all hope for all who enter the Black Forest.
    Mara said at full sarcasm, “I’m convinced. Let’s go back.”
    “Funny. You first.”
    She uttered as she stepped forward, “Me and my big mouth.”
    Luke followed her into the Black Forest. The trees were blackened with a dark bark and thick leaves covered the sky from above like a rooftop. The ground consisted of a blanket of dead leaves and twigs. Each step they took surrendered the sound of cracking foliage underneath. They walked for five standard minutes and could see and feel the difference. The warmth they felt from the system’s sun was now nonexistent. The coldness of the air combined with the lack of light contributed to the overall feeling of dread.
    “This place reminds me of Dagobah,” said Luke. “With much less water. Speaking of that, what does the scanner say about wildlife?”
    Mara glanced at a datapad and read it. “Your basic life forms indigenous to a forest.” She stopped to listen. “Though you wouldn’t know it by sound. It is too quiet in here.”
    “I agree. Let’s see what we can find further in.”
    The terrain stayed the same as they went deeper into the forest. There was one constant variable. No water. No streams or ponds of any kind. After about an hour in, Mara noticed something new on the ground.
    “Luke, take a look at this.” She bent closer to the ground as Luke did the same beside her. She poked at something with her finger that revealed several white seeds. “I thought these seeds were part of a plant here, but I haven’t seen a plant yet where they would come from.”
    “They look like hoyy seeds. For cooking and salads.”
    “Or just to eat,” Mara added. “Not something you’d find in a forest like this.”
    “How would these get out here?”
    Mara glanced back to where they had been. “Judging from where I first saw them a few meters back I’d say they’re forming a line.”
    “Like a trail?”
    “Exactly. As if someone was leading us somewhere.”
    “Then I guess we follow the trail.”
    And that they did. Mara’s theory that the seeds followed a trail was correct. They started seeing more seeds scattered on the ground going in a specific direction. It wasn’t long before they came to the first open space clearing they encountered in the forest. It was almost a mirror image of the meadow without the bright colors. The area was vacant of trees. They could see sky above them but here in the forest the clouds obscured any light from the sun. The main feature of the area was a flat rock with no grass that overlooked a large gorge. Even from his position several meters away, Luke could see that the depth of the gorge was very deep. The flat rock acted as a cliff.
    Mara looked down at the trail of seeds that ended just before the area of flat rock. “I don’t understand. Why does the trail end here? Unless…” She stopped in the middle of a horrible thought. “Oh, my stars, Luke. Could the people who went missing not see the edge of the cliff and…” She couldn’t finish the thought. “They just kept walking…and they couldn’t see.” Her voice started breaking.
    Luke eased her mind. “No, Mara. That’s not what happened.”
    “Then what?”
    Luke took a long pause to answer. “I sense something here. That presence I felt before. It’s stronger here.”
    “Luke, there’s nothing here.”
    “Exactly.” Luke started circling the area of flat rock as if surveying it. “Maybe we’re meant to think nothing is here.” Luke ignored his wife’s look of confusion and closed his eyes. He opened his mind to the Force and focused on the area before him. He spent several minutes in a deep meditation. And then, he saw it. He opened up his eyes and he smiled. “If I wasn’t a Jedi I wouldn’t believe it. Someone without the Force wouldn’t see it until it was too late.”
    “See what?”
    “Hold my hand.”
    She did so without question and she absorbed his thoughts through their Force bond. Slowly forming before her eyes was a small cottage. A one-story dwelling stood where there had been flat rock before. It was made of wood and stone with windows that were blacked out. All indications were that it was abandoned. Luke felt differently.
    Mara gasped. “Why couldn’t we see this before?”
    “It was hidden by the Force.”
    “You mean someone used the Force to hide it. Like Corran can do?”
    “Similar. I can’t be sure, but this feels like the source of darkness I felt in the Force.”
    “That eliminates a large animal. This proves that whatever it is we’re looking for is intelligent.” Mara tilted her head. “Now that you mention it, I can feel something dark here, too.”
    “See if there’s an entrance.”
    Both of them searched the dwelling for any doors and Mara finally did. “Over here, Luke.” He came up behind her to see a front door inviting all who approach. Too inviting. Luke felt something else. Mara said, “Guess we have to knock.” She started walking towards the door. Luke was just behind her when she touched the controls to open the door. A vision flashed in the Force to Luke.
    It was too late.
    “Mara, no!”
    The trap door beneath their feet slid away and they both dropped down into a hole under the ground.

    Part II coming soon!
  2. Jedi_Lover Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2004
    star 5
    Luke once again fell for the trap door in the floor trick. It gets him every time. Let's hope a rancor doesn't live below. Nice start to the story.
  3. madman007 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 22, 2007
    star 4
    No rancor, Jedi_Lover. Maybe something worse.
    Here is Part II. You read this and should know by now what fairy tale I'm translating into Star Wars. More to come soon!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    The Beast Of Black Forest Part II

    Down the stone chute they went from the trap door at the cottage's entrance. The underground ramp was made of stone and was wet with old moss that made it slippery. Luke and Mara emitted various sounds of pain as they fell over each other. Luckily, the trip wasn't long. They were both deposited inside a damp, cold pit. They landed with a wet thud into moist mud. Luke picked himself off and tried to wipe off the dark mud smearing his grey tunic. Mara did the same.
    "This is just great," she uttered. "You could have warned me earlier."
    Luke explained, "I didn't know until it was too late."
    "Whatever." She looked around at their new surroundings. She reached for a glow bar and came up empty. "Kriff, my light is still in our pack up there."
    Luke reached into his pants pocket and took out his glow bar. "I always tell you to keep things on you besides weapons." He started to shine it around them.
    "Show off." She looked back up at the chute they just rode. "Guess we can't climb back up there."
    "Not likely. We still have our weapons."
    "At least. Ugh, my head is spinning. What is this place? There's not much light in here even with your glow bar."
    "Some kind of cavern or cave."
    "There's no bars, so it's not a prison." Mara stepped forward and then abruptly stopped. "Oh...Luke. I'm a bit light headed."
    Luke tried to walk himself and stumbled. "So am I. We didn't hit our heads on the way down. This is something else." Luke fell silent for a moment and said, "Listen. Do you hear that?"
    Mara squinted her eyes in concentration to hear. "A hissing noise."
    Luke carefully walked over to the cave wall. It took him great effort because something was making him weak. He shone the light on the wall and there were several holes in the rock around a thick patch of bright green moss. "Fissures. Oh...it's starting to...really...affect..." Luke started wobbling and fell backward.
    Mara called out weakly, "Luke..." She tried to catch him but her weakened strength could only catch his arm as he went down in the soft mud. She tried to bend down on her knees but in so doing she fell forward over top Luke's limp body. She could barely mutter, "What...is...this?"
    Luke mumbled, "Gas...natural....affects....nerves."
    "Oh...sithsp-..." Her head collapsed over Luke's torso.
    Both of them lay motionless on the mud floor of the pit. Yet, Luke was conscious enough to hear one last thing before he blacked out completely.
    A child laughing.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Luke was finally awake but he still felt groggy. He could move his head but the movement felt as if it were in slow motion. He slowly opened his eyes. He could see he was inside a small rusted durasteel cage. He focused in the Force more. He could still feel the effects of the natural nerve gas. He concentrated to extract them from his system. It took several minutes but he reached the point enough to get his bearings. He moved his head in all directions. He was sitting on the cage floor with his back up against its wall. There was just enough room inside to stretch his legs. He looked down at his belt and, of course, his lightsaber was missing. He wasn't cuff-linked. The small cage combined with the nerve gas was prison enough.
    He looked to his right to see another cage not three meters away from his. Mara was still unconscious laying her head against the metal. He then tried to twist his body toward her. He received a sharp pain coming from his right arm. He looked down at it to see a needle fed into his arm and attached to a clear hose. Something was intravenously being pumped into him. He followed the hose that went outside the cage and was hooked into a drip of some kind. The color of the liquid inside was not water, as it gave off a milky white opaque color. He saw a separate hose coming out of the drip and the clear hose went directly to Mara's arm.
    Luke tried to take the needle out of his arm. He immediately received a sudden shock from behind him. This wasn't natural. Something hit him. Intentionally.
    Luke then heard the same laughter before he blacked out. Only it wasn't a child. The shock interrupted his concentration in the Force, so the effects of the nerve gas were slowly returning. Yet, he could still focus on the figure who had poked him with a vibro-pic.
    "Ahhh, ahhh, ahhhhh. The nosh is trying to come away. Naughty, naughty. It can't do this to be hearty." An elderly man stood just outside Luke's cage after he stepped out from behind it. He had long, stringy and oily grey hair. His face was wrinkled and pale. His nose was so enlarged that it looked like it hooked over his thin mouth full of rotten gray teeth. He wore a dark tattered robe that flowed along with his small frame of a body. His voice was high-pitched and he spoke in a strange sing-song manner that was just eerie to Luke. "The nosh is going to fly with colors. All alone save for three. Soon me be all alone. None but me."
    "Who are you," Luke's voice scratched.
    The man snapped, "Hush, nosh! No labels. Block the way in. They don't flow."
    "What is it you're putting in our bodies?"
    "Mmmm, hmmm. Ration needs a boost. Thicker. Hour by hour. Ready or sour." The man giggled as a child would from knowing an inside joke.
    Luke was about to read the man in the Force when he heard a familiar mumble. Mara was just awakening.
    "W...what's...going on?" Her head lifted slightly.
    "We're being held, Mara," Luke explained. "Can you see?"
    "A...little. Why do I still feel the nerve gas?"
    "It must be coming from the rocks in the cave. Something underneath giving off the gas. Look, Mara, when you move, you're going to find a-"
    "What the kriff is this doing in my arm?"
    "That's what you'll find. It's some kind of intravenous drip, but it's not water or sugar."
    "What is it?"
    "I'm not sure yet."
    "To Hell with this." As she went to take the needle out, the old man moved quicker than Luke could imagine and he poked her with the vibro-pic on her leg. She let out a yelp.
    "Let her go!" Luke yelled.
    The old man sang, "The noshes too sweet. In for a treat." He laughed his childlike laugh.
    "You didn't tell me we had a guest," Mara quipped.
    "There wasn't time. I didn't know how much strength you had yet."
    "I've got plenty now. Figured to use the Force to wean out the gas effects."
    "You are getting good at that."
    "Hey, if I can push out a Vong poison out of me while giving birth to a baby, there's nothing I can't overcome." She looked over at their new captor. "So, who is this character? And why is he talking like he's singing?"
    "Good questions all around. I think the drip is something that's keeping us alive."
    "Alive and healthy," she added.
    "Speak, speak forever and a day,' the old man suddenly sang out. "Still not one visitor, so here you stay. Hours you had filled with goodies. We see how close you come to the light."
    "What the kriff?"
    Luke tried to explain. "We must have been out for hours. Hooked to the drip all that time. No one else is coming for us. The light may mean the sun."
    "When did you start speaking crazy?"
    Luke shrugged. "My sister is married to Han Solo."
    "Good point."
    The old man waddled toward Mara's cage closer. "Slippy is the noshes. The thickness is the show. What I have is ready for the light or shall they stay on many a night?" The man reached inside the cage and felt around for Mara's arm. His closeness to her gave her a good look at the man's eyes. They were clouded over by a film of whiteness. He finally found her arm and squeezed it with his fist firmly. "No, no, no, the factors haven't presented themselves. They wait for the light to dance."
    "I hope you can translate that, Master Jedi. Being that you speak fluent insanity."
    Luke tried to analyze the man's words. "I think he means you're not ready yet. Something about a moving light."
    "There's not exactly any sunlight down here."
    "I'm not sure, Mara. One thing that is sure is he is the source of darkness I felt before."
    The man turned and headed toward Luke's cage. "Pretty, pretty speaks like water. What does the nosh have to offer?"
    Mara said, "Looks like it's your turn."
    "I see that."
    "You know he can't see. His eyes are white."
    "I believe he 'sees' with the Force. It's definitely the dark side. But...it's a darkness I never felt before."
    "Uh, Luke, you stood head to head with the darkest of the Sith, the Emperor."
    "This is different. I can't explain it exactly. Palpatine's darkness was rooted in Sith lore. For all of his madness, he was focused. Determined. He had purpose for his darkness. This man's darkness is more...wild. Untamed. Almost primeval."
    "Well, that primeval darkness is about to squeeze your arm."
    Luke thought a moment and said, "Maybe I can give him what he wants to see his plan."
    "What do you mean?"
    "Let me focus a moment."
    The old man reached Luke's cage and felt around for his arm inside of it. Luke concentrated in the Force to give the man an illusion. The old man found Luke's arm, but what it was in reality was a space of air. Yet, the man squeezed around an arm that felt to him as thick and healthy. And ready.
    The man cheered like a child would in gleeful surprise. "Ahhh, glory, glory. This nosh can soon see the dancing light. Train with all might." He cackled as he retracted his hand away from Luke very satisfied. He waddled away using the vibro-pic as a cane. "Meters to go. Soft is the time. Haste is the prime." His singing voice faded as he turned the corner of the cave and disappeared.
    "So...that happened," said Mara. "What did happen?"
    Luke said, "I gave him a Force illusion of what he wanted. A thick and hearty body."
    "What in the world for?"
    "I have my theories. Right now, I want to get us out of here, now that he's gone."
    "He doesn't think we can escape if he's left us alone."
    As Luke carefully took out the needle of the drip, he said, "I don't think he realizes we can use the Force. Remember, Ameht said there have been no Jedi here." He was free of the drip and he took a moment to use the Force to extract the effects of the gas again. He felt stronger within a few minutes. He easily exited his cage and stood up to stretch. He turned to see Mara standing outside of her cage. "Oh, I was going to help you out."
    "I sometimes can manage without you, dear."
    They took the chance to see their surroundings. They were in a large alcove of a cavern. Small candles lined the walls at unmeasured intervals. They looked behind them to see many more cages like theirs. All were empty.
    Save for one.
    Inside one cage nearby was the figure of a small boy in a fetal position. He was also hooked up to a drip with a needle in his arm. The drip's bag was near complete. He had been there longer. He was unconscious.
    Luke tried to call out, "Augest? Augie?"
    "I don't think he's going to answer, Luke. He's pretty out of it." She moved to hold up his arm. "Luke, he's as cold as a popsicle."
    "We need to get him out of here." Luke carefully took out the needle in the boy's arm and Mara opened up his cage. She tried to pat his arm to warm him up. A moan was all that he could manage. She used the Force to try and kick start his brain activity. His eyes fluttered open and he saw Mara.
    "Who...are...you?"
    She smiled sweetly and said, "I am Jedi Master Mara Jade Skywalker. We were also trapped inside cages but we escaped."
    "Sky...walker? Do you...know...Master Luke Sky...walker?"
    Mara chuckled. "Do I ever. He's my husband. And he's right here."
    Luke bent down to meet the boys eyes. "Hi, there. You must be Augie."
    "Yes. Big...fan....of yours."
    Luke gave an embarrassed look at his wife. She uttered, "Face it, honey, you're famous in the galaxy."
    Luke added, "For all the good reasons." He addressed Augie. "Can you move?"
    "A little."
    "All right, don't try to do too much yet." He stood and told his wife. "Can you sit here with him while I see if I can track down this man?"
    "Yes, but we don't know this cavern yet. We need our weapons."
    "Well, I saw the old man bear to the left of the alcove. I'm going to follow that path to see where he went. As soon as Augie is strong enough to move, you need to get him away from this gas. You'll need to use the Force to–"
    "I know what to do, farm boy. Remember, I gave birth to our son under worse conditions."
    Luke gave a pause and gave an embarrassing, "Right."
    "Must have slipped your mind. I can handle this. You go find that kook. I can follow you when we're ready with our bond."
    "All right." Luke looked down at Augie. "We're going to get you out of here and to your father and sister, Augie."
    Augie muttered, "May...the Force...be with...you."
    Luke smiled and rubbed the boy's head. "Always. Thank you." He nodded to his wife and turned to leave them.

    More coming soon!
    Last edited by madman007, Sep 9, 2013
  4. Nyota's Heart Combos & Paragraphs Host

    Game Host
    Member Since:
    Aug 31, 2004
    star 6
    Hi, @};- This is one fascinating read =D= As usual, your L/M snark is perfect. :) Looking forward to more.
  5. Jedi_Lover Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2004
    star 5
    I hope Luke kills the old man. His sing-song rhyming talk is irritating. Nice update.
    Nyota's Heart likes this.
  6. EmeraldJediFire Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 23, 2012
    star 4
    Hmm I honestly don't know what's going on, but I suppose that's the idea. (sighs) How many parts will this have if you don't mind my asking?
  7. madman007 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 22, 2007
    star 4

    Three parts. The next one will be the end. I felt it was too long to read at one sitting.

    Not sure how you can't know what's going on but maybe the final chapter will explain more.

    Has no one guessed the classic fairy tale yet? Or do you know and just waiting for the end?
    SPOILS! (open)
    SPOILS! (open)
    I figured the trail and the testing of the flesh inside the cage would give it away.

    There is another big clue in the last chapter. With a Star Wars twist, of course.

    Coming soon.
    Last edited by madman007, Sep 10, 2013
  8. EmeraldJediFire Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 23, 2012
    star 4
    What I meant, I'm not sure where its leading. Oh! (eyes light with recognition) Ah...I'll wait till the last part though
    Last edited by EmeraldJediFire, Sep 9, 2013
  9. madman007 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 22, 2007
    star 4
    And here be Part III; Hope you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading

    The Beast Of Black Forest - Part III
    Luke turned left at the end of the large alcove and headed down a narrow path lined with candles attached to the rock walls. It turned and twisted around in the dim light, but Luke followed it easily through the Force. Eventually, he came to a staircase that was definitely man-made. They were made of wood but built imperfectly with jagged angles. They still held their purpose as they led up to a mechanical door. Luke climbed the stairs and the door slid open. He walked through an area that was built into the cavern. The cottage. He was led into a hallway that was lit with modern lighting, though the area was still dim. Luke followed the hallway and came to the entrance to a large room.
    At the other end, the old man tended to what was the room's main source of light. A hearth. The fire inside of it burned brightly. The dancing light, thought Luke. The old man sang cheerfully while he worked.
    Luke could then deduce what was happening. The trap. The keeping of victims in cages. The drip that filled the victim with nutrients so that the muscles would be...thicker. They were being fattened up. Luke cringed at the thought. Luke had come across darkness in his life. Not like this. Pure and wild with no purpose but for one. This man deserved to be called a beast.
    Luke looked around the room. The hearth was at the opposite end from him. To the right was a large table. An enormous cutting blade was stuck upright into the wood. Next to it on the edge was their pack that they left when they went through the trap. Next to that, Luke spotted his lightsaber and Mara's beside it. Luke watched the man carefully and waited for him to turn his back to him. Luke called his lightsaber into his hand through the Force.
    Immediately, he heard the man stop singing. He knew Luke was there.
    The man sang, "Ahhh, the rat has loosened the grip. Free of metal, free of soul. He bites off chips by the edges." The old man turned toward Luke's direction. "The nosh does not like it's ration state."
    Instead of hiding, Luke came out to stand before the old man defiantly. "I know what you are doing. I know what you have done for so many years. You have tormented this village for the last time. You use the dark side of the Force to lure people into your trap. A trap that is a hidden image within the Force. You keep them caged and fed without them knowing. Until they are ready." Luke glanced behind the man at the fire in the hearth. "Ready for the dancing light."
    "Yes, yes, the nosh gains knowledge of the fort. Close to pieces lost."
    Though Luke couldn't understand his meaning, he went with it. "You are not lost. You must stop what you are doing. I can help you. You can do good using the Force. Search your feelings."
    For a moment, the man was silent. Then he started to crack a smile. He then began to slowly cackle that grew into a hearty laugh. The sound of his laughter echoed in Luke's memory. He had heard it before from another dark Force user long ago. He could feel the darkness growing inside the old man. A darkness that was void of all compassion and full of greed.
    The man sang, "Pity, pity, the nosh knows not of the juice. Hidden under the recluse."
    Luke could suddenly feel something else building up inside the man. This was also all too familiar to Luke. This time, he was prepared.
    Instantly, a large spark of Force Lightning shot through the old man's fingers and directed it at Luke. Luke quickly ignited his lightsaber to absorb the energy. Though he successfully blocked the lightning, the sheer force of it pushed Luke back several steps. He still held out his green blade to deflect the bolts coming at him at random. Luke considered using the Force to absorb the energy with his real hand, but that attempt failed years ago in his youth against the clone of Palaptine. Age had caught up to the Master Jedi.
    The old man stopped the bolts abruptly. "Feeble, feeble, nosh. No means of freeing the box. Doomed is all who enters the realm. End is nigh into the dancing light."
    Luke had an idea and he started to circle around the man with his blade in a defensive position. When the second attack of energy came from the old man, Luke used the reflective techniques of Form Three to propel the energy back at its user. The power of the man's own doing was double bouncing off Luke's blade. It thrust the man backwards several meters. He landed into the large table, thus knocking it over along with its contents. The smell of burnt flesh rose from the man's smoldering robe.
    The old man let out an inhuman cry of rage as he stood up weakly. Luke could sense his rage burning like the fire behind him. Underneath the rage was a hint of desperation. Luke anticipated the man's next move and positioned himself specifically.
    The old man spat out, "Dark pours from the wound! Heal is the catch! Never you come with might! Triumph is the fight! Forever is your shade of end. Coldness declares you to bend!"
    Knowing only half of what the man was speaking about, Luke cried back, "I know of darkness! All of my life I have lived through it. I've both confronted it and accepted it. I am the master of my darkness. You can't control yours. It will be your undoing. For all darkness, there will always be a spark of light."
    At once, the man attacked with a battle cry. He used the Force to launch himself into the air with sparks of Force Lightning ready to consume Luke. He flew directly at Luke with lethal intent.
    He never had the chance.
    Luke crouched low beneath the old man flying at him. He swung his blade in an upward arc just as the man was directly above him. The blade cut through the man's torso fully. The two bisected pieces kept their momentum from the speed and landed just where Luke had intended.
    Inside the burning fire.
    The old man's cries of pain ended. It was at that moment when he felt a sudden joy. He turned and his wife appeared at the entrance to the room with a weak Augie standing beside her.
    "Luke, what happened?"
    Before he could answer her, he felt another surging from inside the hearth. He felt that surge before, as well. Knowing what was about to happen, Luke yelled to his wife, "Get down!"
    The dark energy from within the old man erupted from his death, just as it had when Palpatine and C'Boath died. The blue wave of Force came out of the hearth and obliterated everything in its path. All of the man's belongings and furniture were destroyed. The table that held Luke and Mara's pack was on the floor. Luke dropped to the floor making his body flat against it. He used the Force to deflect any debris that flew at him. He could sense Mara through their bond and could feel confusion but her survival instinct won out. She moved herself and Augie back into the hallway away from the blast.
    Within seconds, it was over.
    Luke picked himself up and dusted himself off. The fire inside the hearth had been extinguished. The only light source in the room now was from the outside sun barely coming through the blackened windows. Their pack was underneath him and he grabbed it. He also spotted Mara's lightsaber nearby on the debris-filled floor. He picked it up, too. Mara came out from the hallway with Augie behind her.
    "You all right," he asked.
    "Yeah. Guess I don't have to wonder what that blast was."
    "No."
    Mara surveyed the damaged room and then noticed something. A doorway that had been opened from the blast. "Luke, what was behind there?" She started to walk over to it. Luke tried to call to her to not open it further, but it was too late. Mara gasped at the sight.
    Falling out of the storage area were the remains of various dead carcasses. Some had been decayed from years of age and others were still fresh. It looked like someone or something had feasted on them. Mara didn't have to guess. "What...did he do to them?" she could barely whisper.
    Luke stood in front of Augie, who was looking in another direction. "He consumed them. That was his food. He couldn't stop killing and feeding."
    Mara nodded slowly. "That's why no one came back."
    "Yes," Luke replied in a low voice.
    "And I was next," said Augie, who suddenly appeared beside them. "I just wasn't plump enough."
    Mara gave the boy a knowing glance. "You led us here. Those were your hoyy seeds in the forest."
    The boy smiled and nodded. "I figured someone would try and track me down. I never thought it would be the two greatest Jedi."
    Mara scoffed. "We are hardly that."
    "Now, now, let the boy have his opinion, Mara."
    Mara gave her husband a cocked red-gold eyebrow. "Whatever you say, Master."
    Luke turned to Augie. "So you laid out those seeds so someone could trace where you ended up?"
    Augie nodded. "People in my village have known about the Beast for years. He used to lure men, women, and children back here. They were never to be heard from again. People in my village are not violent. They didn't know what to do. They were too afraid to chase him off. I guess when I disappeared my uncle had had enough."
    "But you went in here on purpose to let people know where the man lived," Luke stated.
    "It was stupid, I know."
    "No, Augie. It was brave. You risked your life for this to never happen again. It's what the Jedi call courage. That's what makes a hero."
    Augie smiled. "So...is it over now?"
    "Yes, Augie," said Luke, "the Beast of Black Forest is dead."
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    A generation later...
    "What happened next? What happened next, Daddy?" the young boy cried out.
    "Well, as you know, Luke and Mara went back to the village to take the boy back to his father and sister. They were all overjoyed."
    The little girl who sat beside her brother had an inquisitive look. "How can you be over joy?"
    Their father laughed. "No, honey, they were all very happy."
    The boy cried, "And Luke and Mara told how they killed the Beast and were called heroes. Right, Daddy?"
    "That's right. They were named Heroes of the Village."
    The girl stated, "And the Beast stopped eating people up."
    "Yes, it did. The Black Forest was no longer dangerous. The boy showed great courage in helping to save more people from being lured by the Beast. Once the villagers realized what the boy did, they were no longer afraid. The boy conquered his fear. And that, my loves, is the beginning of wisdom." He saw the boy try and hide a yawn. "All right, it's time for bed. Both of you."
    The girl hopped off her brother's bed and jumped into her own. "Will you tell that story to us again tomorrow night, Daddy?"
    "Of course. I know you can't hear it enough."
    As the boy covered himself with covers, he asked, "Whatever happened to the boy who helped Luke and Mara, Daddy?"
    He gave a grin and replied, "He became a wise man."
    "We like hearing that tale, Daddy," said the girl.
    "Then you shall hear it again. And then you can tell it to your kids. And they to theirs. Now, are you all tucked in? Excellent." He went to the doorway and switched the main light to a small nightlight in the corner of their room.
    "Good night, Daddy," said the boy.
    "Good night, Daddy," said the girl. "Oh, and tell Grandpa Augie good night for us."
    "I will. Good night, Greta. Good night, Hansa."

    THE END
  10. Nyota's Heart Combos & Paragraphs Host

    Game Host
    Member Since:
    Aug 31, 2004
    star 6
    Super ending. I did feel there were elements of Hansel and Gretel because of the seeds scattering making a trail and the cottage in the first part, but the old dude LOL threw me off. =D= Glad Luke and Mara are heroes at the end too, @};- and legendary ;)
  11. Jedi_Lover Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Nov 1, 2004
    star 5
    When that creepy guy was talking to Luke in riddles I kept visualizing him saying, "It rubs the lotion on its skin." [face_laugh] Nice ending.
    Last edited by Jedi_Lover, Sep 11, 2013
    Nyota's Heart likes this.
  12. Tarsier Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 31, 2005
    star 3
    Very cool story! I figured it was Hansel and Gretel after part 1. You did a great job with the old man's speech, rhyming and hard to follow, but not entirely nonsensical.

    I really like the ending - that Augie went into the forest to stop the monster once and for all, and that his son tells the tale to his grandchildren. :)
    Nyota's Heart likes this.
Moderators: Briannakin, mavjade