Before Small World -- Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan story

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by ardavenport, Dec 14, 2005.

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  1. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4
    Title: Small World
    Author: ardavenport (aka Ani-Chay Pinn, aka Anne Davenport)
    Timeframe: pre-Episode I
    Genre: adventure
    Characters: Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi
    Summary: Our Jedi are sent to answer a fugitive?s request for help
    Note: Originally posted on The Jedi Assembly fanfic forum
    Disclaimer: All characters belong to Lucasfilm; I?m just playing in their sandbox
    ======================================================================


    Obi-Wan Kenobi took carefully measured steps between the marker rows. He breathed with the motion forward, slow, meditative, his arms folded into the sleeves of his brown robe, the hood covering his head. He walked the patterned, stone floor, one foot forward, then another, then another...

    The markers led him around another curve and he followed it, doubling back to the direction he?d come from. Step...step...step...forward. And back. His robe brushed the floor, barely a whisper of sound, his deliberate steps even more silent in the great hall. His master made no sound at all, though Obi-Wan could feel the tiny motion of air from his matching steps just behind him.

    The labyrinth of knee-high markers wound around and around, a pattern of tightly packed rows, snaking through the room, along the walls, filling its center with winding, curling lanes. The markers marched on and on, in pairs, elaborately carved in grained stone with curling leaves and flowers, sinuous animals, dripping fungus and lichen, insects, fish, globs and many limbed things that Obi-Wan did not recognize. At first glance they all appeared to be the same, but subtle differences between them accumulated as the Jedi progressed through the labyrinth. None of them, not even the matched pairs they walked between, were quite the same in either color or shape.

    Another turn. Another long stretch of markers led along a final, columned wall and turned around a corner. Obi-Wan lowered his gaze, back to the floor and the markers, and away from the temptation of anticipation. Of finishing and getting out of the labyrinth.

    The Temple of the World Mothers was not an easy place to enter.

    Behind him, Master Qui-Gon Jinn?s concentration was perfect. Obi-Wan felt the Living Force strongly from his master and he let his anticipation slide away. The World Mothers? labyrinth was as arduous as any Jedi training. Obi-Wan smoothed his momentary distraction, feeling the Force around him, and proceeded at the same steady pace.

    The labyrinth was a meditation. The World Mothers would not welcome anyone into their sacred realm who had not shown them the courtesy of demonstrating their sincerity. One way or another. When they had petitioned to enter at the great door of the Temple the robed young acolyte had bowed to them and silently led them through the huge anteroom, down a long, well-lit hall and through a great archway to the first pair of markers, inviting them to enter through the labyrinth.

    They could have strolled across the great hall, through the lines of markers to reach the inner entrance to the Temple. And endured whatever rumored trials and perils that lay in wait for those who chose to circumvent the contemplative path. But the Jedi had not been sent for a confrontation. And it was obvious that they were expected. Other petitioners at the Temple door were being turned away when they?d arrived. They were ushered in immediately. No one else walked the gray, stone labyrinth with them.

    The Jedi had bowed deeply to the acolyte, thanking her for the World Mothers? welcome and entered. Qui-Gon had Obi-Wan go first to set the pace. Obi-Wan knew that his master was testing him, just as much as the World Mothers. Patience was one thing that his master often corrected his seventeen year-old student about.

    They neared the end of the wall and Obi-Wan cleared his mind, preparing himself to accept whatever the labyrinth would lead them to. He slowly turned the corner...

    Obi-Wan?s resolve wilted when he saw another great
  2. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    Fascinating and well done story. I enjoyed the descriptions and details, especially through the labyrinth.
  3. Princess_Arulmozhi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 16, 2004
    star 4
    Ah, nicely done. I too, loved the descriptions, and the measured way in which Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan acted. The Worlds are fascinating. The aura refreshing. :)
  4. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Beautifully done! =D= The descriptions were lovely and the story was moving. Bravo! =D=
  5. Kestrel_Kenobi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 26, 2005
    star 4
    I really enjoyed this.
    An interesting, well written story.

    =D=

    Great job.
  6. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4
    Aah, I'm glad you enjoyed the story. Thanks for the comments. I'm just as greedy for feedback as the next fanfic writer.[face_mischief]

    This one is actually one of ten different stories that have accumulated on another forum and I was just going to post them slowly here -- I really don't write that fast at all.
  7. Bastet Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 30, 1999
    star 4
    Wow, great story! :D

    I liked the idea of those worlds, very interesting. And that dude being put in one...yikes! :eek:

    I also liked how Qui and Obi were faking being knocked out by that tea, and then the others were arguing about whether they really were faking or not, that made me laugh.

    Thanks for sharing your wonderful story, ardavenport!

    Edit: I just saw your latest post. I'm glad you've got other stories, I'll definitely be keeping an eye out for more from you! :D
  8. dianethx Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    I really liked the way you described the walk that Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon had to go through in order to get to the heart of the place. The worldviews were rather horrifying in their way even as they were walking towards the Worldmothers. I really liked that Yaz had to suffer such a fate. But once the Worldmothers start down the dark path of revenge, they may wish it to be otherwise.

    Good job.
  9. ardavenport Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 16, 2004
    star 4
    Bastet: I liked the idea of those worlds, very interesting. And that dude being put in one...yikes!

    I also liked how Qui and Obi were faking being knocked out by that tea, and then the others were arguing about whether they really were faking or not, that made me laugh.


    Yes, Jedi have all sorts of powers that would fool people that would leave them scratching their heads. Glad you enjoyed the story.

    dianethxI really liked the way you described the walk that Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon had to go through in order to get to the heart of the place. The worldviews were rather horrifying in their way even as they were walking towards the Worldmothers. I really liked that Yaz had to suffer such a fate. But once the Worldmothers start down the dark path of revenge, they may wish it to be otherwise.

    Yes, that long, tedious walk in the beginning bore a strange resemblence to the wait in line at CIII.[face_whistling] And the Worldmothers couldn't take revenge without paying a price for it. Thanks for reading.

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