Discussion in 'SouthWest Region Discussion' started by Moka, Jan 14, 2004.
Pikachu holding a lightsaber, no less.
Oh come on Gerson don't act like you're too cool for Pokemon.. cause you're not... remember our game to kill the time when driving back home? GUESS THAT POKEMON?
I remember that. I found my book about Squirtle "Coming Out." It is still really funny. oh and my blue haze spreads out into a thick blue force mist across the arena, serverely limiting the range of vision of everyone.
Moka dawns his special "Blue Force Mist Optical Vision Goggles" and can see all perfectly clear.
"I believe that this 'Jaded' is in need of a lesson in the art of the lightsaber."
Moka's twirling vortex helicopter of death slows, and he lands nearby Jaded Jedi. He swings at her withhis dual bladed saber...
VWOOOM! VWOOM VWOOM!!
Axia tire of fighting pulls out her brand new blaster and double-checks the label.
"Warning, lasers made of new 'spongy-light', guareented not blockable or deflectable by lightsabers. Acme Inc."
Axia shrugs and takes a shot at somebody, she cant tell thanks to the blue mist.
Moka sees a blaster bolt coming toward him and goes to deflect it. It has a bit more force than usual, but bounces easily off his saber's blade.
He thinks to himself, "Wow, good thing I paid the extra $39.99 for the upgraded 'spongy-light' blade coating made by PEPSICO INC. or I'd be toast right now."
He looks to see where the bolt came from. It was Axia. He thinks that she has betrayed their pact and so charges to meet her in the fray.
Halfway through his swing Moka realizes that the jaded jedi is way too intimidating to try to strike out at- and retracts his blade! He then looks around for another foe that would be a little more suited to his skills as a lightsaberist. (hehehe!! "lightsaberist")
Everyone in the immediate vacinity seems to realize that an undefeatable foe is standing among them. They dare not look in the jaded jedi's direction for fear of soiling themselves.
She is very menacing.
acthar reforms as a blue haze, looks at jaded, soils himself, looks away from jaded, soils himself again and gets ready to fight! He starts shooting blue haze force lightning at moka! He can do that, ya know? the whole force ligthning thing. TAKE THAT!
So how many pieces did I get chopped up into? Give me closure
Axia throws away her blaster and makes a copy of her receipt sending in her refund form to acme.
She then feels a small distrubance in the force and begins counting the Darkstar pieces.
Talon produces a large, empty jar from the folds of his robes. He opens it and captures a portion of the blue haze in the air, and then he seals it.
"Try to coagulate back to bodily form now, Acthar!"
beemo just sits back and wonders why all of this grown people are humming and making buzzing sounds in the middle of Toys 'R Us..........hmmmmmm - interesting...
Axia looks up at the guy watching all her friends in the middle of Toys R' Us and shrugs her shoulders and returns to counting the Achtar action figures....umm I mean the pieces of acthar. Crap! I lost my place! "1..."
Talon glances at Axia... "weren't you counting Darkstar pieces?
Yeah, I am blue haze. there are only 2 pieces of me, my head and my body. oh yeah! FORCE LIGHTNING ON GEOFFRY THE GIRAFFE!
Without warning Moka appears to cower down to the ground in a small ball.
It appears he has sunk in fear...THEN WITHOUT WARNING everyone realizes that he was not cowering but rather focusing and meditating in order to build up the largest discharge of force lightning ever seen since the beginning of the use of force lightning.
He leaps into the air, extends all of his limbs away from him and bursts forth in what looks like an atomic bomb of blue lightning, enveloping and consuming all within it's circle of reach.
He then lands back on his feet, and once again ignotes two sabers ready for any who would dare come against him again.
ZAPP!! POW! ZZZIZIZIZZZIIZZZZTT! ZAPP!
SNAP! HISS! SNAP! HISS! VWOOM! VWOOM!VWOOM!VWOOM!
With one swift move Moka attacks everyone in the TSS...
Axia realizes she's been counting the wrong action figures and begins again only to have some huge bolt of blue lighting hit her and knock her clear across the store into the barbie aisle.
Axia returns with an (you guessed it) entire leeeeeegion of barbie shock troops and attacks Moka!
"Babrie battalion the left flank! Christie Battalion the right flank! Everyone else up the middle!"
Moka pees a little, then runs as fast as he can to the GI Joe aisle.
what Moka doesnt know is that the Barbie army outfitted themselves with supplies from the GI Joe aisle and conscipted the Joes to get the Transformers to help.
Seeing that he has no other options, Moka moves as quick as he can to raise an army from the Pre-school toys aisles.
On the horizon (well OK just down the next aisle) Axia sees rank upon rank forming of Dora the Explorers, Go-Bots, Big Birds, Builder Bob's, Tickle-me-Elmos, and every last one of the "Playskool Star Wars Playset" toys.
A terrifying sound is heard as the final crack shock troops, moka's relentless cavalry, known as the Wiggles (all outfitted with the official "Captain Feathersword's Feathersword"), mount up onto their Barney the purple dinosaurs and grin with evil glee as they sing their disheartening battle chant, "Fruit salad, Yummy yummy! Fruit salad, Yummy yummy!Fruit salad, Yummy yummy!Fruit salad, Yummy yummy!Fruit salad, Yummy yummy!.
It is truly an army that would inspire fear and dismay into the heart of any man.
....I am no man.....
the jaded jedi remains in her menacing stance and snickers a bit when Axia returns to the battle with barbies....
Axia runs in fear out of the toys r us, down the street, around the corner onto teh freeway, to the airport and take the first flight to Spain to recruit...Petra.