main
side
curve
  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Saga SOUL OF LOVE AND BRAVERY (AN AOTC-ERA AU)THANKS and A REQUEST(7/15/05)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by GunraysLawyer, Sep 29, 2003.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. returnofthejeni

    returnofthejeni Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Mar 29, 2003
    I just got done reading "To Absent Friends"
    and I loved that story!
    Especially the OC's, and how they play into everything.

    I know I'm going to like the prequel!

    UP!!!
     
  2. qingauk

    qingauk Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 12, 2002
    HMMM.. the dark side clouds everything..
     
  3. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 1, 2002
    Another great post. I loved how you had Padme shivering with a combination of anger and fear. Great job. And Ivo is about to enter the fray.

    Looking forward to more!
     
  4. GunraysLawyer

    GunraysLawyer Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 23, 2003
    REPLIES AND NEW POST ON 10/3

    ENJOY
     
  5. PatttyB0123

    PatttyB0123 Former RSA star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Apr 2, 2003
    When is the next post? Great chapter.
     
  6. MissPadme

    MissPadme Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 9, 1998
    Great background on Dormé; one thing about SW is that even minor characters have a story. I also enjoyed the "between the reel" stuff with Padmé.

    --MissPadme
     
  7. anakin_girl

    anakin_girl Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Oct 8, 2000
    Poor Padme and Dorme. :(

    "No one is going to die for me like that..." :_|

    And Ivo and crew going to the Senate...can't wait to see what happens here...

    You've got me hooked, GL. Looking forward to seeing where you're going with this. :)
     
  8. GunraysLawyer

    GunraysLawyer Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 23, 2003
    Yes, it is very early here in New England as well as everywhere else in North America, but I'm posting replies anyway. :)

    NamelessAlien-- Yes, I can be the Lord of the Typo, but I'm trying. However, I must inform you that there will be mush in this story, there has to be if you think about it, but trustthe other elements that you cite are key. ;)

    CrystalKenobi--Yes, Padme is safe, for now. Thanks for the compliment, that phrase just seemed to roll off her tongue.


    Darth_Tim--Mutual of Naboo and IGTT Coruscant both quote better than 5,000 credits a year for a 1,000,000 credit policy on a healthy, non-smoking, 20-25 handmaiden. Don't even ask about smoking rates for these girls. :) ;)

    Darth Breezy--Yes, it has begun. I will keep you updated, and I'll try to avoid things that would give Freud fits. :) :cool:

    Arriss--I hope that easy chair is comfortable, 'cause this is gonna be a long ride. Glad you're enjoying it thus far.

    Darth_Lex--Thanks, I thought for a long while on the backstory, but I think tha it makes sense, and allows the use of all sorts of musical references.

    Thanks on the Padme thing. I thought she sounded too cold at first, but then I rewatched the early post-bombing scences in AOTC an dI think that I got it right. I'm glad you agree with me on it.

    Yeah, poor Ivo, the Force always is so crystal clear to him...well, muddy crystal at least. 8-}

    Geo3--Don't worry, she'll learn how to smile like that, but it may come with some heartache and some jealousy of the openness of another relationship. (How's that for a spoiler?)

    returnofthejeni--Welcome, new reader...I'm so glad that you enjoyed the first. I hope that you enjoy this as much. I look forward to seeing you around.

    qingauk--Yes, it does. It gets darker too. Sorry for the downer.

    dianethx--More praise, wow. Let me repeat an announcement to the general readership, If you want to read a well written, fair, and exceedingly interesting portrayl of an AU Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, then go read "Betrayl" by this woman.

    I hope that you continue to enjoy this, and that you continue your wonderful take on a different AU as soon as possible. :)

    PATTYB0123--Thank you, and the next post will be soon. :)

    MissPadme-- Thank you for your kindness. I agree that on eo fthe truly great things about Star wars is that any character you look at has a life story, and generally isn't there as a red shirt, set up to die so that we learn how the monster works, and a spear carrier. Hope someday to get that 5 paragraph response out of you. ;)

    anakin_girl--Thanks. So, I've pulled the self-confessed terrible lurker into the light, and she enjoyed it. Well, I am to please, but there is more set up to take care of...

    New Post within a few moments.


     
  9. GunraysLawyer

    GunraysLawyer Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 23, 2003
    Now, the next part....




    Chapter 1, Part III A Conversation on a Lift

    Ivo made an effort not to appear hurried as he crossed the lobby of the Chancellery Office Tower - but he was in a hurry. His long discussion with the guards at the entry concerning his lightsaber and its effect on his ability to enter the building had caused him to lose most of the extra time he had allowed to get to the Office of The Chief of The Chancellor?s Guard to discuss security for the briefing scheduled for that afternoon. Ivo was also annoyed. He was annoyed that the guards had wanted to stop him and he had been annoyed enough that to influence the guards? minds enough for them to just to let him through. As he approached the lifts, he saw only one available and made for it just as its doors slid shut.

    He briefly considered jamming the doors open with the Force, but he settled for a strong voice.

    ?Hold the lift!? He yelled as he dashed towards it. As he squeezed through the doors, he was greeted with a sight that he somehow knew that he wouldn?t forget. Standing at the right hand side of the lift was an attractive woman of medium height with rich brown hair worn in a rather severe style. She wore a sheath-like dark dress, which hid her figure from any close view. Ivo noticed her very dark brown eyes were questioning. With sudden insight, he realized that he was staring. Gods Ivo?See an attractive woman, and you act like you?re fifteen again. Just thank her, turn, and find something to do.

    ?Thank you for holding the lift.? He said as he began to turn reluctantly to face forward. He then shifted his black nexu fur wrapped, plumed dress helmet from his hand to under his left arm. Lacking anything better to do, he began to whistle softly ?The Procession of the Hunt? from a Naboo Opera he enjoyed??Queen Amimallé?

    ---------------------------------------------


    Dormé had been prepared to sit through a long strategy meeting and lunch after Amidala?s surprise appearance in the Senate. The meeting had just gotten underway when Senator Orn Fre Taa had arrived amidst his retinue of half-clothed female Twi?leks. He had informed the assembled Naboo, Gungan, Alderaani, and Chandrilians that the Kalindan Protector would be at the meeting with some of his staff. Apparently, they too had an idea about how to deal with the crisis. This had shocked everyone. The Kalinadian Commonwealth was one of the great military and economic powers of the Mid-Rim. It had entered the Republic as a state with possessions on multiple worlds, and had stayed that way. The Kalinadian Military was large, well trained, and experienced by anyone?s standards. The nobility of the aristocratic Commonwealth was known to be bellicose and obsessed with taking strenuous action. Amidala had sent Dormé back to the Embassy to obtain any dossier that was available on the Lord Protector or other members of the Kalinadian leadership. Thus, Dormé had traveled back, obtained the dossiers available, and returned to the tower where the conference had been located.

    She had suffered through an interminable wait for a turbolift to carry her to floor of the conference. During the wait, she had begun to read the dossiers on the Lord Protector, Lady Protectrix and the rest of the House Arzhan. She had just begun the biography of the Heir Apparent, Lord Kisavalivo Arzhan, when the turbolift arrived. The doors were a little more than half closed when she heard a low tenor, slightly accented male voice call out for her to hold the lift. Wearily, she looked up from her data pad, and pushed the ?doors open? button. She looked up to see a young man in a dark green, blue-trimmed uniform get into the car. He was tall and appeared fit, but not an over-muscled buffoon like some security she?d seen. Her eyes quickly moved to his face. His deep auburn hair framed a handsome face with regular, if somewhat angular features, and intense gray eyes, which she noted were fixed on her. He must have become aware of his staring, because he seemed to bl
     
  10. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 1, 2002
    Now that is a great scene!!! First meetings are always awkward and yet you've made it seem so realistic. I could just picture the two of them in that turbolift and he begins to whistle off-key...LOL. I noticed that he was whistling about a hunt(hint, hint). I guess his subconcious was trying to tell him something...

    Great job. I'm looking forward to seeing more!
    And thanks for the accolades. You are very kind!!!
     
  11. CrystalKenobi

    CrystalKenobi Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 31, 2003
    I like the interaction between Dorme and Ivo. Sorry I have to make this quick, trying to do this at work with the DSL vs Dial up at home will try to give more of a reply later.
     
  12. RebelMom

    RebelMom Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Apr 20, 2000
    An enjoyable first meeting. I liked the interaction between the two.
     
  13. DarthBreezy

    DarthBreezy Chosen One star 6

    Registered:
    Jun 4, 2002
    Tee-hee!!

    Lovely first meeting!

    [face_laugh]

    I'm enjoying seeing you flesh out Dorme and Ivo!

    Off key

    *tee-hee*

    Edit

    OK, who else has "I get by with a lttle help from my freinds..." going through their head?
     
  14. Darth_Tim

    Darth_Tim Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 26, 2002
    *starts humming "Love In an Elevator" by Aerosmith*

    :D

    Seriously, though, I liked the interaction as well. Also, a good illustration of why I don't sing when anyone can hear...

    -Tim (who sticks to the guitar :D)

     
  15. Arriss

    Arriss Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 1, 2002
    <chuckle> What a way to meet! You presented this scene very well and really came across w/the emotions. Poor Dormé, what?s a girl to do? ;)
     
  16. qingauk

    qingauk Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 12, 2002
    very creative job with some amusing notes interjected!! That was a cutie.. she must have been embarrassed..
     
  17. Darth_Lex

    Darth_Lex Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 17, 2002
    What a great first meeting! :D

    Dorme seems as anxious and fretful as the AOTC character but also deeply loyal obviously, and Ivo is cultured and well-mannered but not particularly good with women (or so it seems). In a funny way I guess they played to their own strengths and weaknesses in their first encounter. Ah, first impressions.... ;)

    I suspect Amidala of Naboo will be none to pleased by the warmongering barbarism of the Kalindians... :p

    This is really getting intriguing. :cool:
     
  18. MissPadme

    MissPadme Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 9, 1998
    Ah, first meetings. Even Ivo isn't immune to awkwardness :). I wonder how Padmé is going to feel about her handmaiden dating a man from a militaristic culture?

    (Sorry, no five paragraph comment this time.)

    --MissPadme
     
  19. geo3

    geo3 Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 29, 2002
    I feel for Dorme and for Ivo.

    Ivo may be feeling a little awkward right now, but that's only because he is interested. In general, he doesn't strike me as a man who would have trouble pursuing a woman.

    The bit with Dorme and the whistling really struck home for me because we have someone like that in our family - he has perfect pitch and can't stand it when we sing along with the radio or our favorite music...we call him the Faschist, and sing twice as loudly when he isn't around...

    Lovely post!
     
  20. Delight

    Delight Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 25, 2001
    Nice! Love that first meeting in the lift and that 'Don't believe everything you read' bit. Wonder what intrigue will follow... :)
     
  21. GunraysLawyer

    GunraysLawyer Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 23, 2003
    Ok, A brief announcement and a Question....

    First, replies on 10/5 and a New Post Chapter 2, Part I on 10/6, then parts 2-3(0r 4; it really has 3 and 1/2 parts) on Wenesday, Friday and Sunday , if necessary.


    The question (inspired by Lex and the illustrations in Winds of Change): Who would you cast to play Ivo Arzhan opposite Rose Byrne and the rest?
     
  22. geo3

    geo3 Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 29, 2002
    Me!!! Me!!!! *raises hand urgently*

    Kenneth Branagh!!!!!

    oops - that was for 'Absent Friends' - he's the age for that.

    Still, how about a younger K.B. for Ivo in this story? It's all imaginary, anyway...
     
  23. GunraysLawyer

    GunraysLawyer Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    May 23, 2003
    As promised, Time for replies

    First, If the 'mush' has scared anyone off, well I can't do anything about where the story goes. I mean for 'To Absent Friends'and 'The Great Game' (where their eldest son is an important supporting character)they have to get together some how.

    dianethx--First post gets first reply. Thanks, I was trying to make it awkward, but realistic. A good part of Chapter 2 will involve similarly awkward moments but in a more public setting. I just hope I can continue to deserve the praise...Oh, and in my opinion you deserve the accolades.

    Crystalkenobi--Thanks for taking the time. You'll see more of this couple, don't worry. :)

    RebelMom--Thank you, I hope that I hold your attention.

    DarthBreezy --Thank you. As to the song in question. I didn't, but I'm sure others did. One question...'Tee Hee'? See you in your Freudian Wonderland... ;)

    Darth Tim--Yeah, it's an illustration why I don't sing in public either. :) As to the song, I did think about using it as a tongue in cheek title for about 2.5 seconds. I feared I'd be being asked for a PM version

    Arriss-- Thanks, but I don't understand this: Poor Dormé, what?s a girl to do? ;) . Care to explain? PM me if you think I'm being embarssingly dense...

    Qingauk--Hello again, I'm glad that you enjoyed it. I will tell you that we're 3 posts away from seeing Anakin, but worry not he'll get here.

    Darth_Lex-- Yes, it is odd to see Ivo embarssed. I'm not sure how Ivo is with women. As Geo3 notes, he's note a man with trouble pursuing a woman, the question is how will he act towards someone who could be the woman?

    I suspect Amidala of Naboo will be none to pleased by the warmongering barbarism of the Kalindians...-- You're not wrong, she will likely react badly to the RealPolitik, pragmatic and cynical worldview represented by the Plan. More in Chapter 2...

    MissPadme-- Yes, even Ivo isn't immune to awkwardness...in fact, it may get worse... [face_devil] [face_shocked] ;)

    Oh, I'll find a way to pull that 5 paragraphs out of you....

    Geo3-- My dear Beta, see my comment above, but you're right he is interested, and in the future we may find him worried as his interest and hers becomes more...

    You're casting suggestion is hard to beat...I'm thinking Henry V here. You know, if I actually may realise my mental cast list at some point in time. People will be surprised at some names :)

    Delight-- Welcome back, Thank you, and we'll just have to wait and see.


    Now a Teaser.............


    ?The Dark Side clouds everything. Impossible to see, the future is??

    At that moment, a small hologram of a Rodian aide appeared on Palpatine?s desk. It spoke in Huttese.

    ?Your Honor, the Kalinadians are here.?

    To anyone who looked closely, Palpatine?s gaze became feral, ?Very Good, send them in?? Yes, send in the brave men of Kalinda?the ones who?ll start this war for me in earnest.

    In his seat to the Chancellor?s left, Master Yoda sat as the presence of two powerful Force users flooded the Force. He knew one signature from the man?s childhood in the Jedi Temple. He was Ge-Harza Arzhan, elected Chieftain of the Dragon Clan of Initiates, Jedi Knight, Apostate, and by accident of birth and history, Lord Protector of the Kalinadian Commonwealth. The other was younger, and more uncontrolled. He was a like a wild fire in the Force, guided only by his heart and his own conscience. More than that, he was troubled by something that he had shielded. This must be the son as a man. I have not encountered him since the funeral for Master T?kali. Interesting this is?




     
  24. RebelMom

    RebelMom Jedi Knight star 6

    Registered:
    Apr 20, 2000
    Mush never scares me away - quite the opposite. I'm drawn to it.

    Oooh, great teaser.
     
  25. geo3

    geo3 Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Sep 29, 2002
    Who's afraid of mush? Not me!

    Hmmm...Palpatine continues to be up to his old tricks, I see....
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.