Saga Spirit Warriors of Angharad *COMPLETE* Link to MS Word version available 8/4

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by ophelia, May 10, 2004.

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  1. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    He was human enough to want her to love him, of course . . . Force knew his love for her wasn?t going to wear off. Love never did, for him. Its nature might change over time, but once he?d come to love someone, it was permanent. For that reason, he?d learned young to dole out love as cautiously as he could. When love took root in him, he was stuck with it.

    It *should* have been impossible for him to form such a bond with someone in so short a time . . . but then, it should have been impossible for a twenty-five-year-old Padawan learner to be knighted and assigned the Chosen One as a student all in one day, just as it should have been impossible for a double-talking hypocrite like Supreme Chancellor Palpatine to stay in office for seven very long years. ?Should? had never really seemed to carry as much weight in Obi-Wan?s life as it did in others?, though. Either the Force had marked him out for some unusual destiny, or it hated him. Honestly, at times it was difficult to tell.


    DARN YOU! STOP MAKING ME CRY! This part was especially poignant for me. Especially the last line.
  2. Arin_Atona Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 10, 2004
    star 4
    Holy shimolies... very nice parting scene! I guess that means the end is near for the fic... :(

    And a public congrats to you this time instead of just a PM ;)
  3. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    LOL, public congrats are much better, I think.
  4. mina_murray Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 7, 2004
    Do you have any idea how much I'm crying?
    I think you do. ;)

    THAT was awesome. This story is awesome. Thank you for writing it.[:D]

    I guess the end really is near now...
    I think I'm gonna start crying again :_|
  5. ophelia Cards Against Humanity Host. Ex-Mod

    Game Host
    Member Since:
    Jun 25, 2002
    star 6
    Oh, don't do that . . . then I'll start crying, only it'll be one of those hysterical, deranged crying fits where I end up under the desk and they call the nice young men in the clean white coats . . .

    I think I need this novel and the focus groups to be over. Oh, and I need to find a job and a place to live. I'm going quite bananas. 8-}

    At least I got my 90-day letter today, which is kind of like a coupon redeemable for a teaching certificate, after you send the state a lot of money and wait a long time for them to get around to you. :)

    ****

    The first thing Obi-Wan saw when he palmed open the door to his room was a small hover chair parked in the far corner. This was not really what he had wanted to see. He needed time alone to collect himself . . . to recover as much as he was going to. He had a Padawan learner somewhere on this ship, who was probably playing with things in the engine room or trying to charm the pilots into letting him run some of the controls, instead of catching up on his studies, which was what he was supposed to be doing. Sooner or later, Anakin would take a break from fiddling with ship components and come seeking his Master, however, and neither of them could afford for Obi-Wan to be a wreck at the time, especially over anything personal. Technically, Obi-Wan wasn?t even supposed to have areas in his life that were ?personal.?

    One did not, however, tell the head of the Jedi Council that it was a bad time, and could he come back later, so Obi-Wan entered with some trepidation and found the small green Master standing on the forward lower corner of his bed. Yoda looked a bit odd there, especially standing with both hands folded on his cane in a patient manner, as if the corner of someone?s bed was just like any waiting area, such as a Senate antechamber or the boarding queue in a busy spaceport.

    Obi-Wan gave the little being a reflexive bow, and acknowledged him with, ?Master.?

    Master Yoda pointed at the head of the bed with the end of his gimer stick, and Obi-Wan obeyed the unspoken instruction by going over and sitting down. ?You wished to speak to me?? he asked. It was a rhetorical question?or at least he hoped it was. He would rather that Yoda hadn?t shown up merely to bonk him on the head with his stick and tell him he?d been an idiot.

    Yoda made one of his many ?Hmmf,? noises, this one translating roughly as, ?You?d better believe it.?

    Assuming he was in trouble, Obi-Wan bowed his head as he pulled his boots off, and tried to display the subdued, deferential conduct he would have requested of Anakin. ?If I?ve earned discipline, Master, then I apologize,? he said quietly. He lined the boots up neatly beside the bed and stretched his legs out on the bed. He would have politely sat with them folded beneath him, in order to avoid crowding his small mentor and superior, except for the fact that he couldn?t. ?I will accept any judgment you make,? he continued, ?All I ask is . . .? His voice faltered for a moment, and he had to stop and reach out to the Force for help with control. It did help somewhat, but unfortunately the Force had not arranged things so that life was free from pain, even for Jedi. The Force was there, it reassured him with its presence, but that was all. It did calm him enough to let him speak, however, and he tried again, ?All I ask is for judgment with compassion. The mission . . . did not go well.?

    Yoda made another of his ?Hmmf? noises. This one seemed to express that his suspicions had been confirmed. Fortunately, he did not seem angry; his reaction appeared closer to that of a person who had believed there must be an explanation for someone?s very out-of-character behavior, and was satisfied at having been proved right. The little Master walked over to where Obi-Wan was sitting, and the being?s usual stiff, wobbling gait was amplified by the resilient surface of the bed. It would have been a humorous sight, if Master Yoda didn?t always have such an air of gravity and dignity about him. ?So,? the
  6. sentinel75 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 21, 2004
    star 1
    'End 401/402'

    You've finished?!
  7. ophelia Cards Against Humanity Host. Ex-Mod

    Game Host
    Member Since:
    Jun 25, 2002
    star 6
    Tomorrow, I think. I've only got one more scene to go. :)
  8. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Oh, man, I never thought I'd cry this hard with one of your posts, but you with Yoda/Obi always makes me at least choke up. It was such a more profound version of that scene in FFD when Yoda whacks him on the head and goes "BE NOT A FOOL!" I love the parallel to ACM, when Yoda "reconstructed" Obi-Wan. I've always loved their very sweet relationship in your universe.

    Unfortunately, you've given me massive frikking plot bunnies--one for when Keme takes care of Anakin while Obi-Wan is in seclusion and one of Yoda/Obi in this kind of universe when they return to the Temple.
  9. ithesock Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 12, 2005
    star 2
    Holy...

    That was beautiful!!!!

    The whole mind-healing session was so well written out - so well thought out. Poor, poor Obi...especially when he realises Anakin has been talking about it.[face_laugh]

    Loved Master Yoda in this.

    401/402?!

    I went 'NOOOOO' when I saw that.
  10. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Ack, I forgot to congratulate on certification!
  11. solojones Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 27, 2000
    star 9
    :eek:
    ?!?!

    :_|

    I still have to catch up, but the thing is, I'm leaving at 4am Wednesday morning. I don't know if I'll be able to before that.

    I just can't believe it's ending :(


    -sj loves kevin spacey
  12. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Anyone else want to see Ophelia do a brilliant short story to give herself a short respite, then plunge back into the world of Star Wars on drugs?
  13. Princess_Arulmozhi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 16, 2004
    star 4
    <in manner of Matreya's Mouse> Mememememememe.............
  14. ophelia Cards Against Humanity Host. Ex-Mod

    Game Host
    Member Since:
    Jun 25, 2002
    star 6
    I've been writing in the "world" of "Star Wars on Acid" (from the initials of the title, in case I never explained that--SWoA) for years, so I'm sure I'll do it again.

    I'm just never, ever, ever writing another fanfic epic. I don't like writing original fiction that much, but if I ever write another thing this long, I'd better be getting paid for it. :p

    And thanks, Ish. :) I know I owe people *so* many author replies, and I actually intend to do that--I'll just use the time I no longer have to spend writing this. :D

    ****

    Anakin?s Master had been sleeping for hours when the boy entered his room quietly to bring him what the Luminus? droid kitchen staff claimed was ?dinner.? As far as Anakin could tell, the meal consisted of reconstituted everything, and its components ranged in color from off-off-white to gray-green to just gray. Anakin was willing to eat just about anything, and even he had found himself asking a droid chef if the kitchen had any Temorian fire sauce. This particular condiment had been invented specifically to kill the taste of food that had gone slightly off.

    Actually, in this case, the problem wasn?t the food?s taste, but its tastelessness. After some reflection, he had decided that eating the Luminus? food was much like eating a pair of one?s old socks, if the same could be made soft enough to chew. Unfortunately, the kitchen crew didn?t have any Temorian fire sauce, so Anakin had settled for a small blizzard?s-worth of salt. He?d actually pocketed a small salt cellar on his way out of the mess hall, on his way to bring food to Obi-Wan.

    He actually wasn?t entirely sure he was doing his Master any favors by waking him to eat this, but he did need to eat sometime, and Anakin had been lonely for him for days. It wasn?t the same having him around if he was just going to sleep.

    Despite his desire to wake Obi-Wan up and talk to him, the boy was quiet as he entered the darkened room and set the tray down on a small table by the bed. The only light came in from the open door and the thin crescent of Angharad that still reflected sunlight. They were in synchronous orbit over the planet, so they would journey through day and night along with those who were in displacement camps down on the battlefield or else making their slow way back to their homes.

    Even in the dim light, Obi-Wan didn?t look so good. The bones were too visible in his cheeks and the orbits of his eyes, and there were dark smudges of exhaustion below his closed lashes. There was a general redness and swollenness around his eyes and nose that told Anakin he?d been crying. Obi-Wan would have died from embarrassment if he knew his Padawan had noticed that, even though Anakin actually found it reassuring to know that his Master suffered and wept like anybody else. Anakin himself was never going to be a ?perfect,? emotionless Jedi, no matter what he did, and it helped to know that Obi-Wan wasn?t either.

    The real shame, as far as he was concerned, was that the Order?s rules on emotion and attachment had forced Obi-Wan to say good-bye to someone he loved, and then made him feel guilty for hurting over it. During his weeks on Angharad, Anakin had learned that non-attachment had its uses; it could keep you calm and cool under fire, so you didn?t do anything stupid and get yourself killed. He?d also learned that non-attachment wasn?t good for everything. He?d needed to draw on his passionate hatred of bullies and those who preyed on smaller, weaker people in order to survive his fight with the Sith on Ix. He?d also learned that life away from everyone he loved was scarcely worth living. Maybe a ?perfect? Jedi wouldn?t care where he was or who he was with, but Anakin cared.

    When he grew up, he was definitely changing the rules. Almost from the beginning, he?d fantasized about how he would remake the Jedi Order if he could, but it was only after the Supreme Chancellor himself had encouraged him to nurture those dreams that he began to think seriously about how there might
  15. Princess_Arulmozhi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 16, 2004
    star 4
    Yeehaw!!!!!

    EDIT: okay, I wrote that so I could reserve first post. <is sheepish>

    First, my dear, let me congratulate you. [:D] [:D] [:D] You've actually finished a marvelous, sparkling 402 chapters of fanfiction feast. <It also means I can save it all up as a word document and re-re-re-read it as much as I want>

    I'm actually sad that its all over - like graduating or something. A happy-sad feeling. Trying and finding a place for insane commenting, and enjoying myself over unlimited Obi-Ani mush. There's no one that writes them quite like you do.

    And this last chapter was awesome. I loved how Anakin picked up the tiny tidbits about Obi-Wan...and about how they both shared a father-son moment. And Obi-Wan's rueful acknowledgement of Anakin's needs. [face_love]

    Bravo a million times.

    And Obi-Wan's eventual realisation that he would even have to let go of the Order (Ah, 'Letting Go.'). But it is so true...spiritual evolution reaches its peak only when you let go of everything.

    And Anakin's wish to 'make it all right'. That lays the foundation for future events, and ties up so very well with canon. (Well, aside from Obi-Wan and Ix, one can argue that this is canon too... :D )


    ?To win, you must claim allegiance to some group or side, and we cannot. We fight,? he said, and then nodded in the direction of the darkened planet, ?they win.?


    Brilliant. @};- @};-

    =D=
  16. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Anakin still didn?t like the sound of it, and he gave broad hint that he wanted Obi-Wan to move over by attempting to scoot right *into* him. ?Now?that?s my bad leg, you know,? Obi-Wan said testily, but he did move over and let Anakin sit properly on the bed, without having to perch. It was a rather narrow bed, and a youth less skinny than Anakin couldn?t have managed it. ?You have to sit just there, do you?? Obi-Wan asked, although this time his tone was as much fond as irritated.

    Anakin didn?t bother answering that question. If he hadn?t needed to sit right there, why would he have gone to the trouble of trying? To his relief, Obi-Wan put his arm around his shoulders and let Anakin lean against him. The boy knew he wasn?t supposed to do things like that?sixteen-year-old Padawans were supposed to be sort of like slightly smaller versions of adults, and be all stiff and boring and unaffectionate. Well, Anakin?s mother hadn?t raised him to be any of those things, and he thought they were stupid. Obi-Wan thought that emotional discipline and control were important, but whether it was through guilt or compassion or simple habit, he couldn?t seem to turn Anakin away when the boy reached out for him.

    ?You do need to hold on tight sometimes, don?t you, poor fellow,? Obi-Wan said, with rueful gentleness. He obviously wanted something else for his Padawan, but wasn?t going to deny the boy affection he was practically begging for, at least not now when Anakin was still young, and had been alone so long.


    That's where you had me start bawling. Did I tell you that I bawled at ROTS when the closing credits came on? That happened to me here, too. But I love the idea of the mini-Masters that Padawans are supposed to be and how it didn't happen with Padawan Kenobi or Padawan Skywalker.

    And hey! He should have been going "WOOHOO! FIVE WEEKS WITH KEME! Oh, I mean, um...yes, Master, if I must suffer such things according to the will of the Force." "Yes, Anakin. Stop bouncing."
  17. mina_murray Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 7, 2004
    [face_dancing]Aww. I can't believe it's over.

    :_| :_| :_| Over...

    I'll return when I'm feeling less bipolar.

    But those were the best 74 pages ever.=D=
    Thanks for the ride.[face_peace]
  18. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Best waste of time I've ever executed. ;) wait, that came out wrong. You didn't waste time, but if my dad knew that I was sobbing over imaginary people while I had homework to do, he'd kill me! I don't care! Well worth it!
  19. sentinel75 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 21, 2004
    star 1
    Congrations, you've finished. Good work for not going all Spielbergian on us *cough*WotW*cough* - "We fight - they win" seems to be a perfect summary of the story themes, and the Jedi way.

    Word count please?
  20. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Yeah, I forgot to ask about that. Do we need a new button for "Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease make it stop!"
  21. ophelia Cards Against Humanity Host. Ex-Mod

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    Member Since:
    Jun 25, 2002
    star 6
    The final wordcount was just under 360,000. 8-}

    I'm also hearing a lot in FG1 about how socializing has never been allowed in the story threads and it needs to stop because it creates needless ups, except I can't tell what people mean by "socializing." If my definition of "socializing" has always been disallowed, then every poster on all 4 story boards should have been permbanned by now.

    Anyway . . . I'm going to make an effort to reply to multiple people at once, to minimize the "upping." It'll just have to be when it's not 4:00 in the morning. :p

    Oh, and P_A--I more-or-less stole the final line from "Seven Samurai" . . . not word-for-word, but the general idea. Since I was ripping off the film anyway, I wanted to end the story like that. Explaining why is another thing I can do when it's not 4 in the morning.

    sentinel75 . . . I'm scared to ask how "War of the Worlds" ended. If you tell me, I guess it had better be via PM or tucked into a post that's mostly about the story.

    And people *outside* FG1 say they don't like it because they don't know what's going on in there . . . 8-}

    Ha! Found "The Seven Samurai's" final lines:

    Shichiroji: So, once again we have survived.
    Kambei: We have lost again. It is the farmers who have won.
  22. Arin_Atona Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 10, 2004
    star 4
    It's done! Finished!

    Congrats, ophelia - you've done a marvellous job at storytelling.

    You even made me like young Obi-Wan a bit! :eek:

    Time to start planning your next fanfic epic! [face_whistling]
  23. Shadowolf Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 4, 2005
    star 2
    [face_laugh] Never in a million years would I have thought that's what SWoA stood for! By coming back to it does that mean we'll get to see how things progress for Matreya?

    Oh Bravo! =D=

    Ophelia, you've written a wonderful story that sucks your readers right in. Your characters absolutely jump off the screen and I've been so enamored by your characterizations. The plot was fantastic and I can't wait to get this baby printed out so I can read over it again! Thank you so much for plugging away and sharing this with all of us, it's been a pleasure to read every day.
  24. solojones Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 27, 2000
    star 9
    Maybe if I don't read the end, it'll never end :_|

    -sj loves kevin spacey
  25. solojones Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 27, 2000
    star 9
    Ok, I have to get out of town but I wanted to share these with everyone first. These reminded me so much of SWoA ;) They're from a recent episode of Family Guy.

    Brian's Novel (part 1) and Part 2

    ;)

    -sj loves kevin spacey
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