Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Kit', Jul 29, 2000.
Hey Kit', let me know what you thought of X-men. I thought it was great!!
Man, I haven't seen X-Men yet. No one out here wants to see it!
More story please.
WARNING: The post that you are about it read contains 'iffy-ness' and this may be attributed to the lack of sleep from the author. However, it is not adivsable to view the next post if you have an aversion to 'iffy-ness' as you may find it's contents disturbing. If you do have the aforementioned aversion to posts that are not the usual calibre of writing, we would like to advise you to turn your computer off now...
Warning sent out by:
Department and Bureau for Iffy-ness.
10:27 pm, Sunday 27/8/00
* * *
Rohnin groggily opened his eyes; the world around him seemed odd and strange. The walls were white, but not the starched bleakness of the infirmary. These were a soft luminous creamy colour and there were lavender coloured curtains too. When he twisted his head Rohnin could see people sitting in beds or moving slowly about the room. They were talking quietly but there was no laughter, no sounds of joy. Rohnin rolled onto one side and groaned at the pain in his leg.
?You are awake.? It was a statement rather then a question. Rolling back over, Rohnin glanced up to see a woman leaning over him. She had short brown hair and brown eyes and she looked like one who was used to being obeyed.
?I would rather not be.? Rohnin said back without thinking. The woman shook her head more to herself then to him and gave a lazy cat-like smile.
?Decorum. Decorum and manners are what make the man?or the slave.? She said to him and then smiled again at his confused look. ?Oh didn?t you know that? You are a slave now, and one who is going to be sold in two days despite my wishes and concerns.?
?And you are?? Rohnin asked. He knew that he was being rude, but he didn?t care. What did he have to live for if Amy was dead? The woman only 'tsked' at him and smiled her cat smile.
?My name is Healer Fey-tal, I am married to Marcus Servilius?slave owner and dealer and I am currently your master. So, unless you start behaving yourself you might end up feeding my rather expensive glordium tiger or if you want to die?remember that being a healer I can do everything in my power to make you live. Your name if you please and be civil this time.?
?Rohnin Darkhil, and I am very pleased to meet you.? Rohnin tried, but the phrasing sounded hollow on his tongue. The last time he had said that had been to Amy. Even just her name could bring back almost haunting memories, the feel of her hair against his cheek, the sound of her laughter, the touch of her fingers against his, the crinkle of her nose when she giggled at a joke. Everything, every little gesture brought back a painful memory. With a start, Rohnin realized that the woman was talking to him again. Noticing that he wasn?t responding she pulled a little light from her pocket and shone it in his eyes.
?I am not blind you know!? Rohnin shouted, causing other patients/slaves in the room to look around.
?And you obviously still have both your lungs and your vocal cords.? Healer Fey-tal said clipping the little torch away.
?Next time you will respond or you will get a beating.? A new voice said. Rohnin half rolled half turned to see a man standing on the other side of the bed.
?Rohnin, this is your other Master. Master Servillius meet Rohnin Darkhil.? The healer said smiling at the older man.
?Don?t get too involved with your little project, Fey?? Servillius said, ?I have just had word that another slaver has been caught, not ours thank goodness. However, it means that these slaves are going to have to be broken up and sold as quickly as possible. Tomorrow if may be.?
?So soon?? the healer asked. She glanced at Rohnin and then back at Servillius. The man shrugged.
?Such is life I am afraid. Tomorrow, I am going to take all of them down to the sale yards and sell them as best I can.?
Healer Fey-tal bit her lip; she had wanted more time to find out what was actually drawing her to Rohnin. Twice last night, after Marcus had fallen asleep she had gotten up to look at his picture on the identity disk and at the two photos. She had destroyed th
I didn't see any iffiness in that post, not a scrap! It was great! I loved the way Rohnin responded to Fey-tal, sassy at first, and then more subservient. I also liked the description of the holo, with him and Amy in the front, and Obi-Wan just visible in the back, with his plate piled high with food. Good! And that Jedi that Marcus Servillius hates so much just has to be Qui-Gon, I know it! This must be a foreshadowing to a hefty showdown coming up at some point, right, Kit'?
All right, go back to sleep. You've earned it with this post--for now.
Good post. Poor Rohnin. Poor Amy. This situation needs recitifying, our sleepy authoress!!
Holy cow Kit'!! That was awesome!! I really liked Fey-tal's protectiveness toward Rohnin. The emotional description at the end almost brought a tear to my eye. Not iffy at all, no way, no how!
That was so good Kat'. I am so glad that you post. Poor Rohnin. Please post more soon.
aw.. so sad.. Hey, this Fay-tel chich sounds kinda nice...
ah man, the Jeid marcus alomst killed wouldn't happen to be Qui-Gon, would it????
Wahhhooo! She posted!
I don't see how you could believe that was iffy kitten. *shakes head* Good luck for QCS!
I've noticed something about 'iffy' posts. Want to know what that is...? It's the fact that as much as I've read that disclaimer I've yet to come across a genuine 'iffy' post.
Kit, guess I'll still be searching for the elusive 'iffy post', cause I didn't find it here.
Now I'm so excited at the idea that Master Servillius was almost killed by my favorite Jedi.
*There's a knock at the door. Marcus goes to open it to find a stoic giant standing calmly on the other side. "Surprise!"
Thanks for the replies guys ~ It was really nice to know that the post wasn't iffy.
Did you guys realise that the last page was taken up purely with begging?
So what do you want now? A post with Amy and Obi-wan or a post with Rohnin?
I really like it Kit. !!!
that's a hard decision.. Amy/obi, or Rohnin???
um.. einy, meny, miny, moe..
how about this. Kit, pick a number 1-10.
How about if you post two posts, back to back? Amy/Obi first, and then Rohnin?
My number is six.......
Actually I am that tired that I fell asleep on the bus so I am not going to post tonight but I should tomorrow night.
Anyway, thanks for replying...and my offer still stands...you decide. Obi-wan/Amy or Rohnin?
I hand to send the search dogs in there to find iffyness... They couldn't find a thing!
Don't you wish the fires would just burn both our schools down so our entire student body is considered SPEACIAL COCIDERATIONS in the QCS tomorrow?
Grr. I am so not ready.
But hey what can you do.
I'm not going to hassle you for a post cause It's too late in the day and QCS is tommorow.
btw, thanks for the free plug!!!
I know its probably to late now, but good luck with the QWC's of what ever they are a friend of mine is also going for them never seen anyone so stressted.
Wait I have to just change this.......Arghh to many mistakes.
This is the post that I had to change.
I don't care what anyone says. YOu can get the iffy-dog-sniffers out. YOu can go over this post with a microscope, you can say that I am fishing for compliments (which let me assure you I am not) but nothing will change my mind. I do not like this post!!!!!!
P.S There should be another one tonight.
Obi-wan bounced Allicia on his knee making the little girl?s golden pigtails wildly fly around with each movement as he watched the Jedi and civilians mingle in the room of a thousand waterfalls. They had had almost a kind of ceremony today, to mark the three-month anniversary of Rohnin?s disappearance. In some ways it was a letting go for his friends; an admittance that Rohnin wasn?t coming back. He had found it uncomfortable after a while, mingling with people he didn?t have anything in common with so he had just drifted away. Now Obi-wan preferred it out on the edges of the crowd, he wasn?t being deliberately anti-social he just didn?t feel comfortable talking to Rohnin?s friends. The brown haired teenager stopped bouncing Allicia and watched her carefully as the little girl slid off his knee and began to trample through the gardens.
Qui-gon often joked that Obi-wan seemed almost to be like Allicia?s father, and in some ways that was true. The little girl called him Obee-wan; and if she wasn?t trying to climb onto his back or play dress-ups with him then she was snuggled up on the couch with Amy. At the thought of the teenager a smile lit Obi-wan?s face for a few moments, she had seemed happier over the last month although she still mopped occasionally. She was even putting on weight again and the Jedi tunics seemed to cling to her figure now rather then hang loosely. Obi-wan?s grin soured as he thought about the effects today might have on her, she had seemed almost too interested earlier when Kendry had remarked about Rohnin?s love affair with the roof.
?Obi-wan.? Master N-ari?s voice snapped Obi-wan out of his reverie. The older woman smiled sadly.
?I hope you are having a good time.? She remarked sitting on the stone ledge behind him.
?It is okay I guess. Rather odd really with Rohnin?s friends here?I don?t know what to say to them. Do I apologize for Rohnin or do I try to make chit-chat? The more I think about it the less I knew about him.? Obi-wan said. Allicia came running back with a handful of flowers. Smiling at her, N-ari swung the little girl into her lap. Allicia giggled and huddled closer holding out the flowers, until N-ari took them and began to absentmindedly braid them into the girl?s hair..
?Thank you.? N-ari said to the little girl as she took more flowers and then turned back to Obi-wan. ?I know that feeling. It is hard to see the people that Rohnin called friends and to not know their names or anything about them.? Obi-wan smiled at her and then turned his attention back to the crowd gathered around the refreshment table. N-ari?s grin brightened as she noticed Obi-wan staring at the food.
?Go and eat.? She said pushing him upwards. The Jedi took off at a pace not quite as slow as a walk but not something he was going to be pulled up for as running. The padawan grabbed a plate making a few cursory half nods to the older Jedi and the adults. He resisted the urge to stick his tongue out at his master as he observed the older Jedi giving a disapproving look at the amount of food his apprentice was systematically stacking onto his plate. Carefully balancing the dish Obi-wan looked around for Amy, she was no-where to be seen. Immediately worried the boy strode over to his master. Qui-gon broke off mid-conversation with An-Paj to frown at Obi-wan.
?I?m sorry Master.? Obi-wan apologized, ?But have you seen Amy??
?No, I am afraid that I?? Qui-gon began but he was cut off by Kendry. The tousled haired boy
?I have! She said something about the need to get away and that there were to many remembrances or something. Then she said she wanted to go and explore and she disappeared.?
Boy, that must be love, if Obi-Wan can abandon an entire plate of food for a girl! Oooh, I wonder what Rohnin is going to say when he comes back and finds his girl snuggled into the arms of a Jedi, no less. I hope he bops Obi-Wan on the nose, grabs Amy away, and plants his lips on hers for the longest smooch in the history of the Jedi Temple!
Okay, more Rohnin now! He's got to come back!
What would be the fun if I brought Rohnin back now? I have far more interesting and horrible things planned for our favourite hero...
P.S: Thanks Mouse2 for voting for ROhnin and amy as best romance. I personally think other people do a better job at presenting star crossed lovers but then again, I WAS STOKED!!!
it will be a sad state of affairs if Rohnin comes back to find Obi and Amy together.. that is ofcoarse .. if Amy actually ends up mirroring Obi's feelings for her.
Its interesting that the largest amount of criticism for this "adventure" comes from the author herself ..
Excellent post Kit'! Give us more!
Best romance for Amy and Rohnin is well deserved. They think each other dead, yet still love each other fully. I want more of it!
BAD Obi-Wan!! MORE!!