Story [Star Trek: 2009] Shopping (Spock/Uhura) short humor one shot

Author note: This was suggested by a reader over at ff.net. It was written late at night on a whim. Please be kind. I hope you will enjoy.

Shopping

?If you know what it is you want, and its size, what is the purpose of coming to a retail center to search for it? Why not just have it replicated to your specifications??

Nyota?s sighed; but not a big heavy production. She knew Spock found the entire concept of shopping illogical. She would grant him that as long as he came with her anyway.

She had picked out three different blouses, all shades of orange, with different artistic designs. As she looked at them and held them up to her chest to get a better idea of how they would look, she noticed that Spock was not paying attention. She had half a mind to have him hold her purse while she went into the dressing room.

?I?m over here, Spock,? she said, throwing one of the blouses at him. It landed on his left shoulder. He looked at it, unperturbed, and took it down, folding it nicely.

?So, you are,? he replied, the edges of his mouth turning up almost imperceptibly.

?I know you?re bored, but this is important,? she urged. ?I?m planning to wear one of these to see my family on my next trip to Earth. And by the way, having an item provided for me by a computer is not as exciting as seek out new and interesting garments.?

?I suppose so,? he replied, still unconvinced. He looked around the store in obvious judgment of its triviality.

?Come here, Spock,? she said, and extended her hand to him lovingly. He took her hand and he led her to a divan sitting between two changing rooms.

He sat next to her, perfectly straight, looking like what he was, a person out of his element. No one could say that Spock ever looked like a ?deer in headlights?. He was much too disciplined for that. As she looked at him, though, she saw something akin to a lost boy, looking for something familiar; someone familiar to give him comfort and safety. She wanted to hug him and kiss him. He was so damn cute.

?Think of it this way,? she began, placing his and on her thigh and stroking it lightly. ?Have you ever been hunting??

He arched an eyebrow. ?Hunting??

She shook her head. ?Never mind. Bad idea. What about searching for the answer to a challenging puzzle??

?I have done that, of course? he replied. ?We are always facing new challenges on the Enterprise and they require us to use our knowledge and experience to over come them.?

?Exactly!? she said excitedly. ?So you understand why we?re here??
Raising both eyebrows, he declared: ?No.?

With her free hand she touched his cheek and leaned into kiss him lightly on the lips. She then pressed her head to his. ?Spock, Honey. The ?challenge? as you call it is my mother. She always makes some comment about how I?m dressed. Either I?m not fashionable enough or I?m too flashy. It makes me crazy. So, the challenge then becomes what to wear? It has to be something new; something she hasn?t seen before. It has to be the right color. She loves orange. And, it has to fit the right way or I?ll hear about that too.

She leaned back not wanting to appear improperly intimate in public. ?So, I?m out here searching; using my knowledge and experience with my mother as my guide to pick the right outfit to wear home.?

?I would be happy to accompany you to Earth and explain to your mother how uncomfortable it makes you that she judges your appearance every time she sees you.?

Nyota laughed out loud. ?As much as I would pay money to see that little interaction, I don?t think it would be a logical course.?

?The logic is sound, Nyota,? he replied. ?Your feelings are hurt by her words and this is something I could bring to her attention and stop it from happening again.?

She smiled and kissed him again; this time one the cheek. ?I love that you want to defend me, Spock, but this has been going on for years. I think that confronting her would only make it worse. All I wanted to do is explain why we?re here.?

?I will accept your wishes.?

?Thank

 

This is great!! I love Uhura trying to explain shopping to Spock

 

Very funny interaction between Nyota and Spock who is definitely WAY out of his element here.

 

Great job! I love Spock trying to reason out shopping with logic!

 

Oh brodie! That was delightful!! Absolutely!!! Hee! i'm one happy camper! A whole RV park full! Tell you what!! Nyota's next shopping trip should be titled: "i want to get my freak on with my hot sizzly honey bear, so I'm buying the slinkiest sexiest lingerie ever." Thanks so much for this sweet read.