Star Wars Fan Fiction Writing Game!

"have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?"

And Master Aids, confident all of a sudden, replied, "No, m'lady. Not the devil... just a Devaronian somewhere in Mos Eisley."

 

Someone from inside the studio suddenly changed the music.

Now I had the time of my life. Though I've never felt this way before... Yes I swear... It's so true... And I owe it all to you...

Master Aids and the Newcomer danced on....

In downtown Coruscant, Royally Tall Ball was not having the time of his life.

 

floating away in his red balloon, Royally Tall (and flatulent) Ball was having a hard time trying hard not to get hit by passing cars. Unfortunately, his red cloak got stuck into one of Coruscant's spires, and he could not get away.

Meanwhile, aboard the Millenium Gwaihir...

 

"Where do we go now," Ian Solo asked, revving up the Gwaihir's engines.

"We have to get to Endor," replied Malfoy.

"Wait a minute! You did not say anything about Endor when you hired me! I am not going there!"

"Roaaarrrr!" Miaobacca growled.

"I need to get to my secret hideaway there," insisted Malfoy.

"No way! I need more compensation for this. You haven't even paid me in full!"

Malfoy started to think.... (a dangerous pastime, actually)....

 

Double post. Please ignore. Move along, move along.

 

"i'll pay you in full when we get there." said Malfoy. "Trust me."

 

... furously, ian solo screamed ..."after you neglected to inform us that the grand moff moffet was after you?!? how do you expect us to trust you again?"...

... malfoy said wisely...

 

... furously, ian solo screamed ..."after you neglected to inform us that the grand moff moffet was after you?!? how do you expect us to trust you again?"...

... malfoy said wisely...

 

"which is more foolish, the fool or the fool who follow him."

 

Ian Solo retorted, "the Fool who double posts and doesn;t think to fix it before the next guy posts. thats who"...


Miaobacca grunts in agreement...

 

..."RRRAAARRGHH"...

malfoy responds smugly..."and how about the so-called ace pilot who claims to be able to evade the empire and can't even get her ship off the ground to get to a simple place like endor!"...

 

Ian Solo quickly draws her blaster and squeezes the trigger...

With superhuman reflexes, the Sith Lord Darth Malfoy pulls out his lightsabre and deflects the bolt away from himself, taunting the pilot with his words...

 

... "your zipper is open..."

 

"i don't have a zipper." said ian solo, as she fires another.

 

... the Sith Lord deftly knocks away the blast...

the blaster bolt deflects away from Malfoy, bouncing off the mirror finish of the Millenium Gwahir twice...

and hitting Darth Malfoy in the shoulder forcing him to drop his lightsabre, which promptly turns off...

... Ian Solo cautiously approches the fallen Sith, and says "I've dealt with Jedi and Sith before... You're just a second rate, trying hard...

 

...copy-nexu!!"

he uses the Force to command his saber to fly to his hand, only to have miaowie grab him by the wrist and the ankle and lift him up over his head...

... the helpless sith screaming like a girl...

 

... "aaaaahhh.... somebody saaave meeee!!!"

 

"Roaaarrrr! ROAAAAARRRRR!!!!" Miawie growled.

"Aaaaaah!!!" Malfoy continued to scream. "What... is ... he... roaring.... about?!?!?" The Sith screamed again.

Ian Solo crossed her arms in front of her, leaned back on the wall and calmly looked at the squirming sith. "Miawie is roaring 'Who's yer daddy? WHO'S YER DADDY?!?!?!' "

"What do I do? AAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!"

"Well," Ian Solo said with a smile. "Who IS yer daddy?"

 

Then all of a sudden, rock band Remy Zero appears and plays the "Smallville" theme.

"Saaaahmmmbaahdeeee Saaaaaaaveeeee MMEeeeeeeeee.."

 

... malfoy answers... "i honestly don;t know..."

... then breaks down into tears...

 

... " I don;t know who my daddy is... I've never had a daddy, now you're telling me that this... this THING is my daddy?"... mayfoy said, pointing to the Wookinky holding him aloft...

...Ian Solo says "no wonder you're disturbed, you can;t even tell the sexual orientation of a Wookinky, Miaobacca can't be your daddy... he's...

 

... "celebate"...

... this particular wookinkee has pledged his life to me and protecting me, he has sworn to me a wookinkee life-debt"

... "and never assume that just because you're a sith lord, you can always have your way, you cry-baby"...

... "now, since you still owe me money for this trip and i need to pay off some bills, cellphone, internet, etc... you will double the amount agreed and we get half of whatever is valuable in your secret base on endor..."

... malfoy is shocked at the arrogance of the smuggler but he is also...

 

... Aroused!!!

he liked strong women, they remind him of his mother, despite being a slave on Tatooine, she was as strong-willed as any free entity in the Galaxy...

... Darth Malfoy agreed to their terms... he said...

 

... "fine, you'll get what you want, you pirate... as long as you take me to endor"

solo nodded and commanded miawie to watch over the sith as she took the controls of the gwaher...

meanwhile... in the emperor's dance studio...

 

... the graceful steps of the Master Jedi Aids had enamoured his partner, she looked deep into his eyes and said ... "you are very graceful on the dance floor, are you this good in other rooms of the house?"

confidently, the Jedi answered, "why of course... but there is one room where i am always at my best...