Stuff you ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY would not want in Episode III

I would ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY not want to see Mace make out with Yoda.

 

Thanks for tonight's nightmare, Lars_Muul. I really needed that.

I don't want another Star Wars film without the "jump to hyperspace" cockpit POV. You know, stars turn into lines and all of that.

I miss that, man.

 

I have so little hope for Episode III that I almost wish George Lucas would put the most awful, ridiculous things in the final prequel. It would be a fitting end to such a disappointing series of movies. Stuff like:

• Lots and lots of cameos of OT characters
• Too much screen time devoted to Boss Nass shaking his jowls
• A cutaway just as Anakin is about to fall into the lava pit
• Grando Calrissian
• N'Sync, led by little Bobby Fett, hunting down the Jedi (and totally kicking arse!)
• A Celine Dion song playing as the Jedi are dying
• Yoda explaining that only Jedi with a high enough midichlorian count disappear when they die
• Bullet-time and any Matrix-like effect during the lightsaber duels
• Darth Maul in a wheelchair
• Darth Maul fighting Yoda in his wheelchair
• Look Who's Talking-like voiceovers for babies Luke and Leia
• A shocking revelation that Sidious's powers come from a magic ring, forged in the fires of Mt. Coruscant

 

I fear Juan_Tufte.

Anyway, I ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY would not want Anakin killing Padmé in Episode III.

Hmm, can't think of anything more ABSOLUTE or POSITIVE than that on my end...

 

I´m glad to be able to help out, Kizakh. Hope you slept well!

 

You lucked out this time, Lars_Muul. I had some strange dream about a cheese factory and accordions last night, with no appearance of Mace and Yoda.

This time...

 

I don't want to see this scenario:

*Anakin, newly transformed into Vader, walks to Palpatine, now Emperor*

Vader: what are we going to do now, Master?

Emperor: Same thing we do every day, Vader. Try to take over the universe!

OR....

Emperor: Now, I will declare myself Emperor and rule this Empire!

Vader: That's ******* brillaint, Master!

(yes, Rick McCallum as Vader )

OR...

Emperor: Vader, let's go hunt the Jedi.

Vader: Yippie!

 

Darth Maul in a wheelchair
Darth Maul fighting Yoda in his wheelchair

LMAO !!!

 

Boba Fett killing Mace

Jar Jar saving anyone inadvertently in a 'hilarious' comedy way

Anakin bursting spontaneously into Bohemian Rhapsody with Palpy on backing vocals
"I am just a poor boy nobody loves me"
"He is just a poor boy from a poor family"
"Knocked into a lava pit by Obi"
"Once was a man but now is part machine"
"Chosen One"
"Evil lord"
"Will you let me go?"
"No, no, no, no, no!"

 

Yoda getting his mac on with Obi-wan and Ani.

Yoda's "lightsaber".

Jar-Jar's "lightsaber".

The jedi knights don black nikes and comite mass suicied, Ani reolizes he joined a cult.

 

Padmé naked. Oops, wrong thread. I ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY DO want to see that...

The real things I don't want to see:
C-3PO's "Goldmember"
Shaven Wookiees
Darth Xio Jade
Darth Maul cloned
A black lightsaber blade
Jar-Jar. Period.

 

Palpi naked....I shutter to think about it.

We find out why C-3PO is nicknamed "GoldenRod"

 

Any more cloning stories of any kind. Christ, the list could be endless (Oh y'know, actually Vader doesn't die at the end of ROTJ, cos there's a gang of 'em living in a cave on Dagobah...)
Coop.

 

Definatly NO MORE Boba Fett. The jedi killed his father. Fine, I can deal with that as his motive for going into the family buisness. But, let's leave it at that. Let's not give him any more thought until he shows up in ESB. Then we can all cheer.

 

1) Any Expanded Universe
2) Palpy = anakins father
3) Jar Jar dying (I bet that'll cause a stir with some folks )
4) Mace Windu being gunned down by a load of Battledroids
5) Padme dying of anything other than a broken heart
6) Any Han, Chewie, Lando cameos
7) Naboo = dagobah/Endor etc etc
8) A prototype Death Star
9) Any boy band, crappy pop artists or any kind of cameo by a celebrity
10) anything Supershadow claims is in EP3 ( )
11) any kind of Rob Coleman cameo (he's had two already let that be enough!)
12) short lightsaber duels

thats it for now.....

 

Stuff you ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY would not want in Episode III

.) That we actually get to SEE the twins
.) Too much Jar-Jar
.) Yoda fighting again
.) Chopped Action-Sequences (e.g. lightsaberbattles)
.) a crappy space-battle just to make ROTJ´s Battle of Endor look better
.) Copy & Pasted TPM/AOTC OST
.) OT cameos (except for Tarkin)
.) Prototype Death Star

.
.
.

 

Bea Arthor!!!

 

HAHAHA! OWNED!

 

Ditto to everything JKBurtola said.

 

a long graphic birth scene

 

I hope I do not see the movie end with more unanswered questions.

 

10) anything Supershadow claims is in EP3 )

Indeed.

About them short lightsaber duels... I actually wouldn't be surprised if Anakin kills Dooku quickly, but I do expect to see a well-fought, long-winded battle between Anakin and Obi-Wan.

Fo

 

I agree, Dooku's duel (with whomever) needs to be short and sweet, like Vader and Obi-Wan's duel in ANH, or perhaps even closer to the length of his duel with Obi-Wan in AotC... He's not a major character, and they really don't need to drag out his death scene.


The focal duel of this one will be Anakin and Obi-Wan's.

 

1. Padme naked AND PREGNANT
2. Vader knowing his child(ren) are alive at the end
3. Captain Typho (man he cannot act!)
4. A Death Star. The plans would be ok.
5. Nute Gunray and the Viceroy surviving.
6. Anikan NOT having a father
7. Qui-Gonn not appearing as a ghost


Wait - I take back #1 - That would actually be kinda hot

 

CGI Chewbacca
CGI Ackbar
Han Solo