Buff, NY Stupid things people say

My favorite right now is "Hot enough for ya?"

 

"I'll come down there and break your legs" But thats mostly at work.

 

I love this new topic! If only I could think of a good line to contribute...

 

"i aint' fer sure" "yous" "same difference" "i could care less"

 

People looking at my tattoos and asking "Are they real?"
And my reply is "No I draw em on every morning"

 

"Do you work here?"


Noooooooo, I just put on the uniform to confuse morons like yourself.

 

I slipped in the tub!

 

^That wins it all!!! ^
But I ate some Palmolive is a close 2nd.

 

Yeah like trying to say there was shampoo in the tub & that's why he "slipped"!

 

you're the foreman?!

 

No problem. I can fix it.

 

"Is this on sale?"

"No, we just put the little yellow sticker next to the original price to trick you."

 

"Are you serious?" "Did you get your hair cut?"

 

Can I get paper IN plastic?

 

"What do you you mean I didn't win I had all red cards!"

Yea right and 3 pair beats a full house-morons

 

Anyone: No, Mr So and So isn't home.

Me: May I leave my number for him to call me back.

Anyone: Sure.

Me: OK, My number is 888-

Anyone: Wait, I need to get a pen....

 

I got one like that, when they call me for a phone # & I start to give it to them & they say wait I gotta go get a pen!

 

Then you ask them to repeat the # and they hang up.

 

<<Customer returning call>>

Me : Thank you. I have your account loading. How may I help you?

Customer: I don't know. You called ME!

 

Phone solicitor: "Are you the person who makes decisions about choosing your phone service?"

Preferred response, "No, we don't have a phone...."

 

"Can I ask you a question?"

 

"There wasn't a sign."
Yes. There is a sign. There always is a sign, there always will be a sign. Just open your eyes.

 

"It will be ready in about an hour"
"AN HOUR?!"
What you would like to say: "DID I STUDDER?!"

Other things you would like to say: "YES, I WENT THROUGH 5 YEARS OF COLLEGE TO BE ABLE TO JUST COUNT TO 30 AND PUT PILLS IN A LITTLE CONTAINER!"

Gosh, I miss working with the public! NOT!

 

Marty, I see you are fitting in nicely at Wegmans! This is only the beginning. Wait until the holidays!

 

?I?ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,? ?Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.